Because of Jesus...

[Christownsme]

Everything I didn't want to happen as a kid has happened in my adulthood.. I began my journey to God as a near atheist. I developed a mental disorder. I dropped out of college. I lost my music career I had going. I developed diabetes. I lost my job. I'm trapped in a red tape wall concerning my meds and my healthcare - which presents a problem with getting married to my girlfriend (that's a long story). I'm scared and confused, about life and about going back to work. I struggle with porn. I struggle to know God loves me, even though it's plain in front of my face. I run from God with my sins instead of running to Him sometimes.

It's good to know and identify the problem areas. I think I did that just there and now.

Now these are the things I've gained, the blessings which are mine:

I have a girlfriend who really loves me. I have two parents, who love me and support me so much. I have a place to live, food to eat, money to pay my bills, I can get my meds I need, I still participate in some music events, I turned from being an atheist to someone who knows God exists and who knows God rewards those who seek him. I have faith. By faith Christ has saved me and is saving me. I can always talk to Jesus. I don't always run from God because of my sins. I eventually give in and turn to Him. God is ever patient with me.

I realize now that much of my former life was lived in such a selfish way. I had a mask on - my total ego - the mask I put on to survive in life. But my ego crashed. My emotions crashed. My whole sense of who I am crashed. I became like Saul, when his eyes were blinded by the light of Christ. Eventually the scales fell off my eyes and I could see again. But there were a lot of brokenness that needed Jesus' touch to heal. And I'm in that healing process today.

I've lost a lot of things, but I'm a better person because of Jesus.

 

[bigo1984]

Matthew 10: 39

Whoever finds their life will lose it, and whoever loses their life for my sake will find it.

 

[joshuanazar]

Awesome man. Just keep focusing on Jesus.

 

[Xalith]

Stay with Jesus, OP.

Even if the very worst on Earth should happen to you, you know there will be a Perfect Life waiting for you in Heaven. It doesn't matter what happens down here, even if you end up dying young, you can still spend Eternity with Him in Heaven.

Our time here on Earth is merely time for us to do His work, to help bring others to Him, and to do anything else that He has planned for us. We don't always know what He wants us to do, but He has ways of gently nudging us towards situations and circumstances and I pray often that He gives me the wisdom to make the right decisions, and to do and say the right things that He wanted me to do, even if I'm not aware of His divine plan for my time on Earth.

Nobody knows what all we've done that fulfills His purpose; He can use nearly anything in your life for His plan, no matter how inconsequential it seems to you. Even sin and the consequences of sin can be used by Him (a murderer or thief can convert or be forgiven and evangelize people while in prison, for example).

So keep on truckin', keep prayin' daily, and He will guide you to do what He wants you to do with the rest of your time on Earth, whatever that may be.

 

[bigo1984]

The topic title of this post makes me think of a song. "Its all because of Jesus im alive." "Its all because of the blood of Jesus Christ."