I feel it is necessary to log the past 3 weeks leading up to today, November 8, 2012. I have been asked so many times about what has happened to me that I feel it is time to journal. Not just for the edification of believers or the stirring of faith in nonbelievers, but also that I might recollect these moments later in life if I need a refreshing memory or something like that.
This is unedited and I am leaving out names.
A couple of months prior to this time:
I attended a revival at my church. There the revival pastor spoke about the gifts of the Holy Spirit and gave stories of healing and amazing things that left me awestruck and hungry. I went forth every night to receive tongues and every night I was left without a feeling of Gods presence. On the last night I was confused as to why my faith wasnt good enough to receive tongues so I caught the pastor after the service and began to question him. On my way to him a man tried to pray for me. This man didnt know that my children were screaming in the car with my wife and I was in a big hurry. I told him, not tonight semi-rudely. As I spoke to the pastor of the revival I was caught off guard by a flooding of the Holy Spirit. I was filled so powerfully that my thoughts left me. I gazed with joy and confusion in the air above me and turned to see the man I dismissed praying for me with his hand about 6 inched away from the part of my back where the most intense feeling of this power entered through. I said, what are you doing in a laughing tone. I ended my question and had to leave to the car in a hurry but I was so full of joy and a physical presence, I barely communicated with anyone the rest of the night. I can only describe it as waves of euphoria emanating from the core of my spirit. It filled and overflowed a well in my being that could not be reached by any other means, truly by my creator, the one who left that void in all of us that only he can fill. Fast forward .
2 Weeks ago:
I have recently been introduced to a book called Appointment in Jerusalem by: Derek Prince. My wife urged me to read it. I was swept away with this biography of a lady who manifested the gifts of the Spirit, almost all of them, in a very short period of time and really didnt have a clue what they were until she asked a Pentecostal pastor about the experiences. Amazing book. This grew my faith in the Holy Spirits gifting and the fact that it still happens. I, in turn prayed to God for a revelation. I wanted these gifts more than anything. After a couple of days I was searching on you tube for a mans name that the revival pastor had mentioned. I was led to a tent revival led by Kenneth Hagin in 1997. As I watched, I saw a great, lively service with shouting of joy and Halleluiahs. When it came time to preach the man, Hagin, was struck with an undignified laughter that consumed him in front of thousands. Long story short, he walked around the service for about an hour just laughing and the laughter caught others. They were shaking and jumping in a disturbing way, not theatrical but disturbing real. I was convicted all of the sudden of the thoughts and words I had spoken against these type people on TV. I realized, through this pressing in of the Holy Spirit that I was missing out and I repented in my heart and believed the power that was taking place at that meeting. I didnt have to make this decision really, it was an understanding that opened my eyes and I saw it to be true through my spiritual eyes. I couldnt possibly maintain my prejudice against this truth. It is hard to explain that to a non-Christian. I just believed!!!
The next day:
At work I decided to show a co-worker this video. I wanted God to reveal to him the power and necessity for the Holy Spirit. He is Catholic, but I believe his views to be Christian. However I felt the need to educate him and obey this nudge of the spirit, so I pushed play on the video. What happened next changed me forever. Before the video ever showed up I was filled with the Holy Spirit so heavily that I had to hold on to the desk to keep from jumping around or falling. The pressure of the joy and euphoria was so intense this time that I could barely speak. I looked at my co-worker in a creepy way and proceeded to explain, in detail, what I was feeling and what this was. I detailed it to the best of my abilities because I feel that people need specific details, not general descriptions of these events for their faith. I just wanted him to see the Spirit at work on the video, but God wanted him to get a real view!!! Over the next couple of hours we worked and dealt with customers regularly. I was writing with shaky hands and at times had to run and hide to keep from laughing uncontrollably or tearing up in front of customers. The sensation gradually left me and I was in a peaceful, joy filled haze. Later that day the store was empty and the Spirit filled me again, each time more intense than the last. I was under so much pressure spiritually and physically that I walked up and down the aisles and uncontrollably spoke halleluiahs and glory to Gods while praying for everyone I loved. Whew!!! Glory to God!!! That passed again after a time and I went home, still in a haze, and picked up my children and hugged my wife with the joy that cannot be dictated. I continued to be obsessed with my moment by moment union with my God for days. One time I even watched the video again and ate M&Ms again just to try and re-live that glorious feeling. Its where I belong, I thought, and, I hope this doesnt fade away. That Sunday night, last Sunday Nov. 4th, I had the opportunity to lead worship. I picked out my songs at home and practiced hurriedly. I had been in prayer on and off for the Holy Spirit to show himself in a mighty way in the service that day. The morning service left me disappointed but hopeful that something was building. That evening the songs were sung and the message was about the need of the power of the Holy Spirit. I chuckled, of course. He preached with a strong but practical delivery. At the end of the service he asked the small crowd that makes up the night service to come to the front. Those with tongues were told to exercise them and the ones without were prayed over to receive them. Smaller services are good for this type thing. I wanted tongues to be mine. I have tried to utter things but, they felt so man made and stupid I embarrassed myself by myself. This time I got on my knees and received with all I knew how to, the gift of tongues. I began to speak words that sounded like a complex language! This was different. I believed a little and spoke them in my truck on the way home and felt a little peace when I was done. I could stop and start them at my will however it wasnt definitely a real thing. The next day I got home from work in a frantic race to the shower for prayer and time alone to practice this again. The words became very fluid and almost Russian sounding. I leaned my head back in the shower and went to a peaceful place in my soul when I turned off the water I stopped speaking these tongues and stared through the shower curtain with a smile and that haze returned to me. I stood there for almost 5 minutes trying to enjoy the sensation. Since then my words have been flowing easily and bring me peace and a spiritual filling of the gas tank. I cant explain it. I just feel like my compass if calibrated with God being north and peace is thickly spread through my spirit. I feel like I have a membership card to the throne of God and can enter anytime. Tongues are weird though!!
Wednesday Nov 7th yesterday:
I had a normal day at work. Our cat died and I went home to remove it from the house and bury it. I did this alone since I have wussy girls. Just kidding they are really brave, sometimes. During that time I started feeling sick. This was not a normal sick as it grew into my spirit. I was surprised and confused to feel such a disturbance I couldnt explain. I was pressed down so hard I started calling everyone I loved to make sure they were ok. I even checked to see if some giant event had taken place on the world scene. Nothing. I prayed and prayed. I even commanded an evil spirit, if it was there, to depart from me. Nothing. I just waited and prayed for discernment or answers. The intensity reached a peak when a co-worker came down to get a pizza. I was so hurt and almost physically hunched over that I asked him if he was doing ok. I told him I was a Christian and God tells me things sometimes. He said he was fine and thanked me for having courage and the care to ask such an intrusive question. I felt no change and was disheartened and wanted it to go away. I had called the man that l had been blessed by that night I was talking to the revival pastor over and over again and got no answer. I felt drawn to his advice because of a pull of my spirit. I believe God has paired me up with him for like an apprenticeship of sorts. I hope he is up for it. I could not reach him and went home discouraged and spiritually and physically depressed hard. I took a shower and prayed again. My wife was at church with my kids so I was home alone. I would like a night off to myself but I felt the need to find answers to my problem. I needed prayer or something, this was getting hard. Upon arrival I went to the eating area and proceeded to get a plate and eat with my family. Before I got my plate my phone was ringing. It was my friend I tried to call all day returning my call. I took the call in another empty room and told him everything and wanted to make sure I was handling it correctly. He said I did well and proceeded to pray for me over the phone. In his prayer he paused and said (as though, it had just come to his attention), if there is and spirit or curse or demon, etc Be gone in the name of Jesus, BE GONE I was in full prayer with him agreeing in all things he was saying and on the second BE Gone I felt that depression break up and fall away almost like an alka seltzer tablet dissolving. He said that he thought something just broke on me and I said I think so but I will call you back in a few minutes when I have proof. I then went to sit down with my family and within 10 seconds my joy was restored 10 fold and I began to involuntarily tear up. I apologetically dismissed myself and ran to the room I took the phone call. I was overcome, overtaken, overwhelmed by a laughter that was so great and giggly. I tried for several minutes to leave the room but the laughter and joy was so intense that I couldnt be around people. I got on my knees in a corner and just let God have me. I laughed with so much joy that I would have scared anyone that saw it. I even took a picture of myself to remember this experience. There evidently was a dark spirit on me!! Believe it folks. Something is trying to stop this chain of events. Believe me. I am not a dreamy hippy. I really experienced this last night. I called my friend to confirm his suspicion that a spiritual hold was broken. I couldnt hardly speak I was laughing so much. He started laughing too. AMEN! I walked around until I had the courage to go in the eating area. I was still not in presentable shape but ran straight to our retired Pastors table and half crashed into it. I was laughing and making all kinds of wild gestures. I looked to be on meth. The table caught on very quickly that the presence of God was all over me. I said, Where are you are going tonight I am coming with you. I needed an escort. It was that bad, people. I followed him to a prayer meeting and started us off with a detailed description similar to this letter. We all praised God and started speaking in tongues and praying in English and giving God glory like I have never seen. Some people told me their arms went up almost involuntarily during this time. I have never witnessed anything like the worship that was given in that room. I led the group in a song then to leave to go help with the kids. I wanted to stay all night. The older crowd was very shaken, moved, edified, whatever.
God is moving. He has been moving so fast on me. I have too many people wanting to know what is happening to me so I am writing this.
BELIEVE IT You can have this too.
This is unedited and I am leaving out names.
A couple of months prior to this time:
I attended a revival at my church. There the revival pastor spoke about the gifts of the Holy Spirit and gave stories of healing and amazing things that left me awestruck and hungry. I went forth every night to receive tongues and every night I was left without a feeling of Gods presence. On the last night I was confused as to why my faith wasnt good enough to receive tongues so I caught the pastor after the service and began to question him. On my way to him a man tried to pray for me. This man didnt know that my children were screaming in the car with my wife and I was in a big hurry. I told him, not tonight semi-rudely. As I spoke to the pastor of the revival I was caught off guard by a flooding of the Holy Spirit. I was filled so powerfully that my thoughts left me. I gazed with joy and confusion in the air above me and turned to see the man I dismissed praying for me with his hand about 6 inched away from the part of my back where the most intense feeling of this power entered through. I said, what are you doing in a laughing tone. I ended my question and had to leave to the car in a hurry but I was so full of joy and a physical presence, I barely communicated with anyone the rest of the night. I can only describe it as waves of euphoria emanating from the core of my spirit. It filled and overflowed a well in my being that could not be reached by any other means, truly by my creator, the one who left that void in all of us that only he can fill. Fast forward .
2 Weeks ago:
I have recently been introduced to a book called Appointment in Jerusalem by: Derek Prince. My wife urged me to read it. I was swept away with this biography of a lady who manifested the gifts of the Spirit, almost all of them, in a very short period of time and really didnt have a clue what they were until she asked a Pentecostal pastor about the experiences. Amazing book. This grew my faith in the Holy Spirits gifting and the fact that it still happens. I, in turn prayed to God for a revelation. I wanted these gifts more than anything. After a couple of days I was searching on you tube for a mans name that the revival pastor had mentioned. I was led to a tent revival led by Kenneth Hagin in 1997. As I watched, I saw a great, lively service with shouting of joy and Halleluiahs. When it came time to preach the man, Hagin, was struck with an undignified laughter that consumed him in front of thousands. Long story short, he walked around the service for about an hour just laughing and the laughter caught others. They were shaking and jumping in a disturbing way, not theatrical but disturbing real. I was convicted all of the sudden of the thoughts and words I had spoken against these type people on TV. I realized, through this pressing in of the Holy Spirit that I was missing out and I repented in my heart and believed the power that was taking place at that meeting. I didnt have to make this decision really, it was an understanding that opened my eyes and I saw it to be true through my spiritual eyes. I couldnt possibly maintain my prejudice against this truth. It is hard to explain that to a non-Christian. I just believed!!!
The next day:
At work I decided to show a co-worker this video. I wanted God to reveal to him the power and necessity for the Holy Spirit. He is Catholic, but I believe his views to be Christian. However I felt the need to educate him and obey this nudge of the spirit, so I pushed play on the video. What happened next changed me forever. Before the video ever showed up I was filled with the Holy Spirit so heavily that I had to hold on to the desk to keep from jumping around or falling. The pressure of the joy and euphoria was so intense this time that I could barely speak. I looked at my co-worker in a creepy way and proceeded to explain, in detail, what I was feeling and what this was. I detailed it to the best of my abilities because I feel that people need specific details, not general descriptions of these events for their faith. I just wanted him to see the Spirit at work on the video, but God wanted him to get a real view!!! Over the next couple of hours we worked and dealt with customers regularly. I was writing with shaky hands and at times had to run and hide to keep from laughing uncontrollably or tearing up in front of customers. The sensation gradually left me and I was in a peaceful, joy filled haze. Later that day the store was empty and the Spirit filled me again, each time more intense than the last. I was under so much pressure spiritually and physically that I walked up and down the aisles and uncontrollably spoke halleluiahs and glory to Gods while praying for everyone I loved. Whew!!! Glory to God!!! That passed again after a time and I went home, still in a haze, and picked up my children and hugged my wife with the joy that cannot be dictated. I continued to be obsessed with my moment by moment union with my God for days. One time I even watched the video again and ate M&Ms again just to try and re-live that glorious feeling. Its where I belong, I thought, and, I hope this doesnt fade away. That Sunday night, last Sunday Nov. 4th, I had the opportunity to lead worship. I picked out my songs at home and practiced hurriedly. I had been in prayer on and off for the Holy Spirit to show himself in a mighty way in the service that day. The morning service left me disappointed but hopeful that something was building. That evening the songs were sung and the message was about the need of the power of the Holy Spirit. I chuckled, of course. He preached with a strong but practical delivery. At the end of the service he asked the small crowd that makes up the night service to come to the front. Those with tongues were told to exercise them and the ones without were prayed over to receive them. Smaller services are good for this type thing. I wanted tongues to be mine. I have tried to utter things but, they felt so man made and stupid I embarrassed myself by myself. This time I got on my knees and received with all I knew how to, the gift of tongues. I began to speak words that sounded like a complex language! This was different. I believed a little and spoke them in my truck on the way home and felt a little peace when I was done. I could stop and start them at my will however it wasnt definitely a real thing. The next day I got home from work in a frantic race to the shower for prayer and time alone to practice this again. The words became very fluid and almost Russian sounding. I leaned my head back in the shower and went to a peaceful place in my soul when I turned off the water I stopped speaking these tongues and stared through the shower curtain with a smile and that haze returned to me. I stood there for almost 5 minutes trying to enjoy the sensation. Since then my words have been flowing easily and bring me peace and a spiritual filling of the gas tank. I cant explain it. I just feel like my compass if calibrated with God being north and peace is thickly spread through my spirit. I feel like I have a membership card to the throne of God and can enter anytime. Tongues are weird though!!
Wednesday Nov 7th yesterday:
I had a normal day at work. Our cat died and I went home to remove it from the house and bury it. I did this alone since I have wussy girls. Just kidding they are really brave, sometimes. During that time I started feeling sick. This was not a normal sick as it grew into my spirit. I was surprised and confused to feel such a disturbance I couldnt explain. I was pressed down so hard I started calling everyone I loved to make sure they were ok. I even checked to see if some giant event had taken place on the world scene. Nothing. I prayed and prayed. I even commanded an evil spirit, if it was there, to depart from me. Nothing. I just waited and prayed for discernment or answers. The intensity reached a peak when a co-worker came down to get a pizza. I was so hurt and almost physically hunched over that I asked him if he was doing ok. I told him I was a Christian and God tells me things sometimes. He said he was fine and thanked me for having courage and the care to ask such an intrusive question. I felt no change and was disheartened and wanted it to go away. I had called the man that l had been blessed by that night I was talking to the revival pastor over and over again and got no answer. I felt drawn to his advice because of a pull of my spirit. I believe God has paired me up with him for like an apprenticeship of sorts. I hope he is up for it. I could not reach him and went home discouraged and spiritually and physically depressed hard. I took a shower and prayed again. My wife was at church with my kids so I was home alone. I would like a night off to myself but I felt the need to find answers to my problem. I needed prayer or something, this was getting hard. Upon arrival I went to the eating area and proceeded to get a plate and eat with my family. Before I got my plate my phone was ringing. It was my friend I tried to call all day returning my call. I took the call in another empty room and told him everything and wanted to make sure I was handling it correctly. He said I did well and proceeded to pray for me over the phone. In his prayer he paused and said (as though, it had just come to his attention), if there is and spirit or curse or demon, etc Be gone in the name of Jesus, BE GONE I was in full prayer with him agreeing in all things he was saying and on the second BE Gone I felt that depression break up and fall away almost like an alka seltzer tablet dissolving. He said that he thought something just broke on me and I said I think so but I will call you back in a few minutes when I have proof. I then went to sit down with my family and within 10 seconds my joy was restored 10 fold and I began to involuntarily tear up. I apologetically dismissed myself and ran to the room I took the phone call. I was overcome, overtaken, overwhelmed by a laughter that was so great and giggly. I tried for several minutes to leave the room but the laughter and joy was so intense that I couldnt be around people. I got on my knees in a corner and just let God have me. I laughed with so much joy that I would have scared anyone that saw it. I even took a picture of myself to remember this experience. There evidently was a dark spirit on me!! Believe it folks. Something is trying to stop this chain of events. Believe me. I am not a dreamy hippy. I really experienced this last night. I called my friend to confirm his suspicion that a spiritual hold was broken. I couldnt hardly speak I was laughing so much. He started laughing too. AMEN! I walked around until I had the courage to go in the eating area. I was still not in presentable shape but ran straight to our retired Pastors table and half crashed into it. I was laughing and making all kinds of wild gestures. I looked to be on meth. The table caught on very quickly that the presence of God was all over me. I said, Where are you are going tonight I am coming with you. I needed an escort. It was that bad, people. I followed him to a prayer meeting and started us off with a detailed description similar to this letter. We all praised God and started speaking in tongues and praying in English and giving God glory like I have never seen. Some people told me their arms went up almost involuntarily during this time. I have never witnessed anything like the worship that was given in that room. I led the group in a song then to leave to go help with the kids. I wanted to stay all night. The older crowd was very shaken, moved, edified, whatever.
God is moving. He has been moving so fast on me. I have too many people wanting to know what is happening to me so I am writing this.
BELIEVE IT You can have this too.
WOW 
