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Baptists (and others)-- Wives submit to husbands? Wives and husbands equal partners?

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Rose_bud

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I elaborated on Ephesians on the previous thread, highlighting how Pauls position on the household code was revolutionary, and counter-cultural. In the Greco-Roman world the head/master is the husband. But now the head/master is doing things that would not necessarily befit his station. Paul was strategically subverting the order by not changing the system but by pointing people to Christ who changes people, that influences the system. But I'll add to it the following.

Pauls letter to the Ephesians is written to explain the status that Christians have IN Christ (a key term mentioned in this letter).

In Him we were chosen, in Him you were included when you heard the glad tidings of salvation, marked in Him with a seal. In Him all thing in heaven and earth are unified (another key term)

Pauls prayer for them is that they grow in wisdom and knowledge, know the blessed hope they are called to and the power for newness they received. Paul emphasises the unity of the body, which is the church. The fullness of Christ who fills all things. He is the Head. Humanity is his new creation, created for good works.
He elaborates on the reconcilation and unity of the Jews and Gentiles. The mystery that God would have in Himself two made one. All nations joined as one in Him, members of one body. This letter and Galatians and some of the other letters, detail the hinderance and suffering he experienced as a messenger of this truth. But we also know the new humanity is not just ethnicity but also male and female, rich and poor, slave and master all unified as a body under one head - Christ. Paul appeals to them to make every effort to love, be kind and patient with each other to maintain the unity of the Spirit through peace. They are indeed one, and various gifts has been given for the growth in the unity and maturity of the body, the church. He encourages them to leave the old way of life and embrace the new. Submitting one to another. As a theological image, wives come under your husband raising them up in Christ. He is the head of the wife in the Greco-Roman household. Just as the church comes under Christ lifting Him up before all powers and authority. As a theological image, husbands love your wives as Christ love the church, by dying for her. He loved till death. Jesus gave up all of his priviledges and rights for his church. The husbands do likewise.

Alluding to Genesis, the leaving and cleaving. Paul says this is a mystery but he is speaking about Christ and the church.
From the post about Genesis we know God created humanity (both male and female) to rule over all of creation. But before the mandate to them, Adam was alone and not good, so from his side one like him was created. One of the same mindset, likeness as him (as Christians and his bride we are called to be of His same likeness and mindset, we are to be like Him). In Genesis when Adam saw Eve, he knew this one is like him and not another creature. Bone of my bone, flesh of my flesh.

That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh. The idea is that in Christ we are one, we as the church become like him in all things, a new humanity that will rule and reign. I don't think it is about who is next in line under Christ as head.

Spiritually speaking the true Adam is Jesus Christ from Him (they pierced His side) the Church (comprised of every nation, every gender, every status and class). She is to be like Him perfect in every way. One flesh, united to fullfill the mandate.

He further asks them to hold, stand firm, fight the good fight completely clothed in this new person Jesus Christ as an armour, for the battle for them (His church, His body, His bride) to be like Him as a living reality is a fierce one.
 
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tall73

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I did not, at that point, have any intentions beyond that one post. As the thread evolved, I had to make decisions about how I wanted to post.

So to your mind, saying to someone that they are "ignoring" parts of the text that they don't like, is not to imply a lack of integrity?

When I am in a discussion and say that someone is ignoring something, it is to try to get across that they have not addressed that point, so that they can address it. When that is done many times, and they continue to not address it, I am then compelled to try to figure out why. So I asked about your view of inspiration, asked about how you saw various texts etc. And as you said, you then strategically made decisions as you went, deciding not to engage.

You mentioned we all have a filter, and I think that is fair. But it also means that if we have filters, then someone else pointing out what we have not addressed results in us having to expand the filter to take into account the position of the other person, if we want to persuade.

If someone tells me I am only looking at the portion of Scripture that fits my position, and not analyzing the others, then to me, that let's me know that I have to address the particular arguement that they see as critical to the issue, in order to convince them.

So for instance, both @Adventist Heretic and @Rose_bud, now that we have begun looking at the Ephesians text details, have asked how I see the Eden material, because they see it as a central point, closely connected to the issue.

I agree it is critical to the discussion, and that it needs to be addressed, so I am not upset when @Adventist Heretic, in his characteristic fashion, indicates I have not addressed it. I haven't yet addressed it, so that is fair.

The reason I haven't looked at it yet is that the only one who has spelled out a view in-depth so far on those passages is @Rose_bud and I was waiting for her to finish her presentation, because she said it was all connected.

However, now that both she, and @Adventist Heretic have asked about it, we will apparently need to get into the issue sooner, rather than wait for the whole presentation.

And yes, it is how I speak about things, and have even applied it to myself in speaking to people, or even internally, noting that when I am trying to figure out a large theme in Scripture I cannot just look at the evidence I like and not account for the rest. I am obligated to make sense of all the texts. And on a number of issues where I have struggled with making sense of all the texts, I have to keep reminding myself that I cannot settle for reconciling only some of the texts, but all of them. The natural tendency is to focus more on what makes sense of things for us. But we need to reconcile what does not make sense, to the degree possible, because it is all Scripture.

That is part of why I discuss things online. I study the Scriptures, and have a view of them, but by discussing with people who have a different view I am forced to confront elements I have not seen clearly before. And while the process is not always enjoyable (many times it is), it usually does give a better understanding, and at times results in me changing my views.

And in this case, I was further wondering what you were trying to get across because you said things such as the following:

At the end of the day, all of this is petty semantics. What exactly Sarah meant, or Peter thought Sarah meant, or we think Peter meant, none of that can justify abusive dynamics in marriage​
I can argue for something on all sorts of grounds, but those grounds may not be the reason why I have to make the argument in the first place​
I am not interested in discussing Paul's and Peter's arguments in detail​
Since the specific arguments you have identified as important to your position have no real bearing on my position, I am not inclined to get dragged into discussing them in detail​

You indicate you formed your strategy as you went through the thread. Fair enough.

But if the following statement that you now made is how you view the situation, why not just say it up front, with your first post, so that we wouldn't have to waste time engaging on the topic?

You said:

I don't expect a complementarian to be convinced by Scriptural arguments, because they have Scriptural arguments and are convinced they have the right way to understand those Scriptures. I think the only way we are likely to get traction on that, is to show the fruit; to show how those arguments shape attitudes and behaviours which are harmful. And that then challenges the Scriptural hermeneutic.​

There would be no need for me to press you on what part of Scripture you are not addressing if you don't think there is any point to discussing the Scripture with complementarians in the first place.

And your view regarding what will convince complementarians is in agreement with what I found the more I pressed--that you have a standard based on secular academics that sets limits on what may be considered a legitimate interpretation for you. That you feel this is what needs to be presented, to inform views of Scripture, rather than Scripture informing views of what constitutes abuse.

If that is your view, then there was no need for you and I to get into the details of Scripture at all, because they are not your focus in the conversation, and you would not be engaging in the sort of exchange that the thread is designed for.

If you stated your view, I could have saved time and not needed to figure out your view of inspiration, view of the text, etc. or asked about why you did not address various aspects, because that would be clear.
 
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tall73

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Hey tall73:wave:

If you agree on mutual submission but understand headship as something different. I am also curious to know what that means to you and how it is practiced.

It might be helpful if we start with what mutual submission entails to see if we are agreed. If so, then we can move to the next element, and if not we can clarify.

For now I will just post some of the Scriptural backing:

Matthew 20:25-28​
25 But Jesus called them to Himself and said, “You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and those who are great exercise authority over them. 26 Yet it shall not be so among you; but whoever desires to become great among you, let him be your servant. 27 And whoever desires to be first among you, let him be your slave— 28 just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life a ransom for many.” (NKJV)​
Romans 12:10-13​
10 Be kindly affectionate to one another with brotherly love, in honor giving preference to one another(NKJV)​
Galatians 5:13​
13 For you, brethren, have been called to liberty; only do not use liberty as an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another. (NKJV)​
Ephesians 5:15-21​
15 See then that you walk circumspectly, not as fools but as wise, 16 redeeming the time, because the days are evil.​
17 Therefore do not be unwise, but understand what the will of the Lord is. 18 And do not be drunk with wine, in which is dissipation; but be filled with the Spirit, 19 speaking to one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody in your heart to the Lord, 20 giving thanks always for all things to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, 21 submitting to one another in the fear of God. (NKJV)​
Philippians 2:1-4​
1 Therefore if there is any consolation in Christ, if any comfort of love, if any fellowship of the Spirit, if any affection and mercy, 2 fulfill my joy by being like-minded, having the same love, being of one accord, of one mind. 3 Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself. 4 Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others. (NKJV)​

These texts, among others show the attitude that should characterize all believers, expressed in various terms, but with parallel thoughts.
 
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Paidiske

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If someone tells me I am only looking at the portion of Scripture that fits my position, and not analyzing the others, then to me, that let's me know that I have to address the particular arguement that they see as critical to the issue, in order to convince them.
How your comment came across, was as an accusation that I was deliberately ignoring and not accounting for those texts and arguments, not just in this conversation, but in forming my own views. Hence my finding it to be an accusation of a lack of integrity.

I have no issue discussing things with people with whom I disagree. But it is all too common - especially on these issues - for those people to also make accusations along the lines that I am ignoring Scripture, that I am taking a particular position out of pride or desire for power, that I am rebellious and a Jezebel, and so on... (there are even less savoury accusations, but I gather you get the drift here). So yes, I am sensitive to those sorts of comments, because in my experience they generally come with a significant amount, not of respectful disagreement, but the kind of judgement I've just described.
But if the following statement that you now made is how you view the situation, why not just say it up front, with your first post, so that we wouldn't have to waste time engaging on the topic?
When I made my first post, I didn't even know if anyone would reply to it or I would come back to the thread. I did not foresee the direction the discussion has taken.
There would be no need for me to press you on what part of Scripture you are not addressing if you don't think there is any point to discussing the Scripture with complementarians in the first place.
Not that there is no point, exactly, but in my experience with this topic, arguing Scripture on its own doesn't get us anywhere. We just each end up pointing at the text (or slightly different portions of text) and wondering why the other can't see what is so blatantly obvious to one's self.
And your view regarding what will convince complementarians is in agreement with what I found the more I pressed--that you have a standard based on secular academics that sets limits on what may be considered a legitimate interpretation for you.
Not exactly. Yes, secular understandings of abuse and trauma inform my hermeneutic, but not in a way that sets limits on Scripture so much as a way that secular understandings and Scripture mutually inform each other. Probably the single most important foundational precept of my hermeneutic is that Christ came in order that we may have life, and have it abundantly. Therefore anything that diminishes that abundant life runs at odds with Christ's purpose; including hierarchy in marriage, which I can only see as diminishing the dignity, agency and flourishing of the wife.
That you feel this is what needs to be presented, to inform views of Scripture, rather than Scripture informing views of what constitutes abuse.
I don't trust the attempt to define abuse solely from Scripture, because in my experience that attempt is always simply blind to far too much abuse, and trauma, and harm.
If that is your view, then there was no need for you and I to get into the details of Scripture at all, because they are not your focus in the conversation, and you would not be engaging in the sort of exchange that the thread is designed for.
Yes, the Scriptures are not my focus, or at least not my main motivation in replying, which I think I did try to say numerous times. But if you didn't simply want the questions in your OP answered, you did not make that very clear to start with. If you had said, "I only want responses with in-depth Scriptural exegesis and argument," at least we would have known what you were looking for, and could have decided whether or not to participate on that basis.
 
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Rose_bud

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It might be helpful if we start with what mutual submission entails to see if we are agreed. If so, then we can move to the next element, and if not we can clarify.

For now I will just post some of the Scriptural backing:

Matthew 20:25-28
25 But Jesus called them to Himself and said, “You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and those who are great exercise authority over them. 26 Yet it shall not be so among you; but whoever desires to become great among you, let him be your servant. 27 And whoever desires to be first among you, let him be your slave— 28 just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life a ransom for many.” (NKJV)

Romans 12:10-13
10 Be kindly affectionate to one another with brotherly love, in honor giving preference to one another(NKJV)

Galatians 5:13
13 For you, brethren, have been called to liberty; only do not use liberty as an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another. (NKJV)

Ephesians 5:15-21
15 See then that you walk circumspectly, not as fools but as wise, 16 redeeming the time, because the days are evil.
17 Therefore do not be unwise, but understand what the will of the Lord is. 18 And do not be drunk with wine, in which is dissipation; but be filled with the Spirit, 19 speaking to one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody in your heart to the Lord, 20 giving thanks always for all things to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, 21 submitting to one another in the fear of God. (NKJV)

Philippians 2:1-4
1 Therefore if there is any consolation in Christ, if any comfort of love, if any fellowship of the Spirit, if any affection and mercy, 2 fulfill my joy by being like-minded, having the same love, being of one accord, of one mind. 3 Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself. 4 Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others. (NKJV)

These texts, among others show the attitude that should characterize all believers, expressed in various terms, but with parallel thoughts.
:wave:

I understood your previous post to mean, that you agree to mutual submission. But then you also believe in headship. I wanted to know what you understood headship to mean and how that would look like in practice.
 
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tall73

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How your comment came across, was as an accusation that I was deliberately ignoring and not accounting for those texts and arguments, not just in this conversation, but in forming my own views. Hence my finding it to be an accusation of a lack of integrity.

I apologize. I will try to find better ways to express that I would like someone to respond to specific arguments.

that I am taking a particular position out of pride or desire for power, that I am rebellious and a Jezebel, and so on... (there are even less savoury accusations, but I gather you get the drift here).

I do not think any of those things of you. And now understand that you were not ignoring the texts in your study, but only precluding discussion here.

I agree, the discussion is a charged atmosphere.

On the other side we are accused of promoting abuse, being abusers, promoting slavery, being obsessed (and sometimes such as from my friend @Adventist Heretic, saying at the same time he claims I am obsessed, that I am not taking it seriously and just game playing and pursuing a hobby), of wanting power, of hating women, etc.

Not that there is no point, exactly, but in my experience with this topic, arguing Scripture on its own doesn't get us anywhere. We just each end up pointing at the text (or slightly different portions of text) and wondering why the other can't see what is so blatantly obvious to one's self.

I have experienced many discussion like that on a variety of topics, Scripture or otherwise. But I have also changed views through challenging discussions, seen others do so, etc. The frequency is not high, but either way it does result in thinking things through more thoroughly.

Yes, the Scriptures are not my focus, or at least not my main motivation in replying, which I think I did try to say numerous times. But if you didn't simply want the questions in your OP answered, you did not make that very clear to start with. If you had said, "I only want responses with in-depth Scriptural exegesis and argument," at least we would have known what you were looking for, and could have decided whether or not to participate on that basis.

Thank you, I accept that critique.
 
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tall73

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:wave:

I understood your previous post to mean, that you agree to mutual submission. But then you also believe in headship. I wanted to know what you understood headship to mean and how that would look like in practice.

Yes, I understand the request. I am trying to go through things a step at a time to make sure we are on the same page.

Do you think that the above Scriptures are some from which you obtain the notion of mutual submission? There is no point in discussing how things look if we don't even agree on the terms.

Mutual submission in the above is not striving for power, looking out for others, serving, humbling yourself, not thinking of yourself as better than others, giving yourself for others.

Is that how you understand it? The example above all is Christ.
 
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tall73

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We might also note some of the extended context of the above passages, like the condescension of Christ in Philippians 2, the walking in the Spirit which produces the fruit of the Spirit, which makes mutual submission possible in Galatians 5, along with the picture of crucifixion of the flesh, and its works, etc.
 
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Rose_bud

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Yes, I understand the request. I am trying to go through things a step at a time to make sure we are on the same page.

Do you think that the above Scriptures are some from which you obtain the notion of mutual submission? There is no point in discussing how things look if we don't even agree on the terms.

Mutual submission in the above is not striving for power, looking out for others, serving, humbling yourself, not thinking of yourself as better than others, giving yourself for others.

Is that how you understand it? The example above all is Christ.
Hi there :wave:

Yes, without giving to lengthy a response. I can agree that Gods Word is consistent with the concept of Christians submitting one to another.

As you pointed out submission is placing the needs of the next person ahead of your own, coming under to lift up. The goal is the complete well-being of the next person, sometimes at the expense of your own.

The contrast would have elements of elevating self above others, putting self on a platform looking down. Valuing self of much more importance than the next person. Making self the standard or measure instead of Christ.
 
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Rose_bud

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We might also note some of the extended context of the above passages, like the condescension of Christ in Philippians 2, the walking in the Spirit which produces the fruit of the Spirit, which makes mutual submission possible in Galatians 5, along with the picture of crucifixion of the flesh, and its works, etc.
Paul appeals to the Philippians and to us of this mind-set that we have. If are united with Him, if we comforted by this great love that was demonstrated on the cross, this great love that we celebrate and remember. If we are one community in spirit, if we care. Then we need to forget ourselves long enough and consider the next person.

I agree, Paul magnifies the extent of the great act of service and loves when he points out who Jesus really is and His condescension.

In emptying himself and humbling himself on the Cross, not just any cross a Roman cross of ultimate shame and humiliation, Jesus revealed the character of God. He is not a God who selfishly takes even though he has the power to do so, rather God pours Himself out, because of the great love he has for us. He put a value on us, a stamp, a mark, we are not priceless. We are bought by the blood of the living God. We are united in Him, our lives are of value to Him, it has purpose. And many times we don't see each other that way.

Paul also demonstrates this concept, for he is a learned Pharisee, from the acclaimed school of Gamaliel, an apostle of God, a prominent leader in the early church, but because of Christ he is writing to the Philippians from a prison. He forfeited all he has for the sake of others, and for the love of Christ and the gospel. He writes that even the choice between living or dying, he makes choice that would rather benefit others than himself.
 
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tall73

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Thank you. I think we are generally agreed on that concept then.

The next thing I am going to look at is something we touched on earlier in the thread. It is a (somewhat) less controversial example of, for lack of a better term, leadership, within the context of the mutual submission of the church. And it relates to what you mentioned about Paul as well.

Overseers/Elders are an example of Christian leadership, following the teaching that Christ laid down about leadership not being about lording it over others, but about serving.

We see in the various passages that we are to yield/submit, and cooperate with elders or workers in the gospel. Meanwhile, they are to serve, looking out for the flock. They do not do their own will but that of Christ, as undershepherds to the Chief Shepherd. And they must give an account. They are watching over the flock, and protecting it.

These elements of service, accountability, and the flock yielding to them are characteristic of healthy Christian leadership. It is not like worldy leadership, but it is still leadership.


1 Peter 5:1-4 1 The elders who are among you I exhort, I who am a fellow elder and a witness of the sufferings of Christ, and also a partaker of the glory that will be revealed: 2 Shepherd the flock of God which is among you, serving as overseers, not by compulsion but willingly, not for dishonest gain but eagerly; 3 nor as being lords over those entrusted to you, but being examples to the flock; 4 and when the Chief Shepherd appears, you will receive the crown of glory that does not fade away. (NKJV)​
Acts 20:17-38​
17 From Miletus he sent to Ephesus and called for the elders of the church. 18 And when they had come to him, he said to them: “You know, from the first day that I came to Asia, in what manner I always lived among you, 19 serving the Lord with all humility, with many tears and trials which happened to me by the plotting of the Jews; 20 how I kept back nothing that was helpful, but proclaimed it to you, and taught you publicly and from house to house, 21 testifying to Jews, and also to Greeks, repentance toward God and faith toward our Lord Jesus Christ. 22 And see, now I go bound in the spirit to Jerusalem, not knowing the things that will happen to me there, 23 except that the Holy Spirit testifies in every city, saying that chains and tribulations await me. 24 But none of these things move me; nor do I count my life dear to myself, so that I may finish my race with joy, and the ministry which I received from the Lord Jesus, to testify to the gospel of the grace of God.​
25 “And indeed, now I know that you all, among whom I have gone preaching the kingdom of God, will see my face no more. 26 Therefore I testify to you this day that I am innocent of the blood of all men. 27 For I have not shunned to declare to you the whole counsel of God. 28 Therefore take heed to yourselves and to all the flock, among which the Holy Spirit has made you overseers, to shepherd the church of God which He purchased with His own blood. 29 For I know this, that after my departure savage wolves will come in among you, not sparing the flock. 30 Also from among yourselves men will rise up, speaking perverse things, to draw away the disciples after themselves. 31 Therefore watch, and remember that for three years I did not cease to warn everyone night and day with tears.​
32 “So now, brethren, I commend you to God and to the word of His grace, which is able to build you up and give you an inheritance among all those who are sanctified. 33 I have coveted no one’s silver or gold or apparel. 34 Yes, you yourselves know that these hands have provided for my necessities, and for those who were with me. 35 I have shown you in every way, by laboring like this, that you must support the weak. And remember the words of the Lord Jesus, that He said, ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive.’ ”​
36 And when he had said these things, he knelt down and prayed with them all. 37 Then they all wept freely, and fell on Paul’s neck and kissed him, 38 sorrowing most of all for the words which he spoke, that they would see his face no more. And they accompanied him to the ship. (NKJV)​
Hebrews 13:17 17 Obey those who rule over you, and be submissive, for they watch out for your souls, as those who must give account. Let them do so with joy and not with grief, for that would be unprofitable for you. (NKJV)​
1 Corinthians 16:15-16​
15 I urge you, brethren—you know the household of Stephanas, that it is the firstfruits of Achaia, and that they have devoted themselves to the ministry of the saints— 16 that you also submit to such, and to everyone who works and labors with us. (NKJV)​

If those who lead do not lord it over the flock, and those who follow yield, and submit to those who lead, then there is unity. And it is not antithetical to mutual-submission. Elders also yield, and serve, as Christ did. But there is submission to an Elder due to the work they do, specifically outlined in addition to service to one another generally, which is seen as benefiting the whole flock as they can do their work more easily.
 
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tall73

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Nor does it mean that all the members of the flock are left out of leading in various capacities, or exercising gifts. All contribute to the edifying of the body.

Ephesians 4:11-16​
11 And He Himself gave some to be apostles, some prophets, some evangelists, and some pastors and teachers, 12 for the equipping of the saints for the work of ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ, 13 till we all come to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to a perfect man, to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ; 14 that we should no longer be children, tossed to and fro and carried about with every wind of doctrine, by the trickery of men, in the cunning craftiness of deceitful plotting, 15 but, speaking the truth in love, may grow up in all things into Him who is the head—Christ— 16 from whom the whole body, joined and knit together by what every joint supplies, according to the effective working by which every part does its share, causes growth of the body for the edifying of itself in love. (NKJV)​

All work together for the gospel:

Philippians 1:27-30​
27 Only let your conduct be worthy of the gospel of Christ, so that whether I come and see you or am absent, I may hear of your affairs, that you stand fast in one spirit, with one mind striving together for the faith of the gospel, 28 and not in any way terrified by your adversaries, which is to them a proof of perdition, but to you of salvation, and that from God. 29 For to you it has been granted on behalf of Christ, not only to believe in Him, but also to suffer for His sake, 30 having the same conflict which you saw in me and now hear is in me. (NKJV)​
 
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Paidiske

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If those who lead do not lord it over the flock, and those who follow yield, and submit to those who lead, then there is unity. And it is not antithetical to mutual-submission. Elders also yield, and serve, as Christ did. But there is submission to an Elder due to the work they do, specifically outlined in addition to service to one another generally, which is seen as benefiting the whole flock as they can do their work more easily.
I think, though, there are some fundamental differences here to the situation with marriage. One is that the yielding to elders is only in relation to the life and mission of the church; it is not something that applies to every aspect of one's life. (And one is free to leave a church at any time, unlike a marriage). And another is that, while there may be exceptions, Christians have not generally taken this to mean that one cannot disagree with an elder, or refuse an instruction, or that this precludes collaborative or consensus-driven decision making. The exercise of leadership does not (or at least, should not) turn into an exercise in control.
 
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tall73

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I think, though, there are some fundamental differences here to the situation with marriage. One is that the yielding to elders is only in relation to the life and mission of the church; it is not something that applies to every aspect of one's life.

Well, we mostly agree on that. Though I would suggest that the life and mission of the church is all pervading, and sometimes in modern contexts we fall short of the intense fellowship that existed in the early church. Now perhaps in your experience as pastor, and at least at one point as I recall, pastor to a busy multi-church district (which as I relayed, I know is a challenging role having pastored two such districts) you may be deeply immersed in church life continually. And I have had times even outside of pastoral ministry where small groups, ministry, visitation, etc. likewise came close to the frequency of contact and familiarity of what appears to be described in the early church. However, for many of the members I don't know as they do experience things at quite the level of involvement of the church seen in Acts and the epistles. That aspect has varied in some of the churches I have belonged to. Some did it better than others.

In any case, there is no doubt it is less intimate and all-encompassing as the marriage relation.

(And one is free to leave a church at any time, unlike a marriage).

Well, perhaps these days, but for the first many hundred years, I am not sure that was exactly the case. There was the true church, which was largely all in fellowship together, prior to the eventual splits in the Ancient Church of the East, Oriental Orthodox, eventually the Eastern Orthodox and Catholic, and finally Protestant and restorationist churches. The only alternative options that I see in early days were schismatic (and of course some reckon various options today are as well).

2 John 1:9-11​
9 Whoever transgresses and does not abide in the doctrine of Christ does not have God. He who abides in the doctrine of Christ has both the Father and the Son. 10 If anyone comes to you and does not bring this doctrine, do not receive him into your house nor greet him; 11 for he who greets him shares in his evil deeds. (NKJV)​

And another is that, while there may be exceptions, Christians have not generally taken this to mean that one cannot disagree with an elder, or refuse an instruction, or that this precludes collaborative or consensus-driven decision making. The exercise of leadership does not (or at least, should not) turn into an exercise in control.

I would agree with that. I think the apostles in particular did have a considerable directing authority, but even then used that authority for building up, rather than tearing down, to use Paul's phrasing.

I don't see the gifts as having ceased, but I do largely see the gift of apostle being particularly for that critical time. God could raise up apostles again if He wanted, since Paul, for instance, was not, like the others, a witness of Christ's ministry and resurrection at the time, but did see Christ after. However, it would have to be abundantly clear.

While I see the deposit of faith passed down, I don't consider that overseers had the same authority as the founding apostles. There is room for interpretation I suppose in Paul instructing Titus to command the Cretans on various points. Was it showing the authority of Titus ( who wound up settling in there eventually), or relayed authority of Paul? (With the obvious caveat that any authority in the church is delegated, subject to Christ's direction)

In any case, the churches I have been in, whether as a pastor or lay member, have been largely lay driven, often with a business session having top authority. Some gave more role to elders (or their equivalent) than others. But I have not been in any strictly elder board-driven, or individual pastor-driven situations. As an Adventist the administrative levels about the local congregation had a significant role. Since leaving that I have been in congregational churches, aligned with similar such congregations.

The emphasis in the texts emphasizes leading by example, exhorting, at times rebuking, correcting, and watching over souls, as one who must give account.

The Acts council is perhaps the clearest case of Elders being at the heart of decision making, but that was beyond the congregational level, and under the supervision of the apostles. And the letter relays that it seemed "good to the Holy Spirit" and to us, so obviously, it was directed, and I would not apply that same conclusion to the situation today, whatever one might think of later councils.

I don't cite overseers as a direct parallel to marriage, in any case. It is just establishing that servant leadership or oversight, is not conflicting with mutual submission.
 
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Paidiske

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Well, we mostly agree on that. Though I would suggest that the life and mission of the church is all pervading, and sometimes in modern contexts we fall short of the intense fellowship that existed in the early church.
Maybe; but what I mean is more, the authority of church leaders is not about what people study, or where they work, or how they parent, or that kind of thing (of course excepting illegal activities which must be reported). I mean, people might seek advice on those matters and we can then reflect with them about them; but in general, the role of church leaders is about what the church does as a community, not about the personal lives of members.

Whereas in marriage, all of those personal things (and more) become negotiated realities, as what one spouse chooses impacts significantly on the other.
Well, perhaps these days, but for the first many hundred years, I am not sure that was exactly the case. There was the true church, which was largely all in fellowship together, prior to the eventual splits in the Ancient Church of the East, Oriental Orthodox, eventually the Eastern Orthodox and Catholic, and finally Protestant and restorationist churches. The only alternative options that I see in early days were schismatic (and of course some reckon various options today are as well).
It's true that you couldn't "church-shop" like you can now. But my point is simply that if you have a problem with church leadership, you can simply choose not to attend, or to be less involved, or in other ways set boundaries, in a way that you can't in marriage.
But I have not been in any strictly elder board-driven, or individual pastor-driven situations.
Neither have I. (A big part of the reason I've chosen the denomination that I have, is that I see the collaborative and shared decision making, and the shared power, as healthy and important, and not something I see in every church). Even though my church has an episcopal polity, we involve lay people in decision making at every level.
I don't cite overseers as a direct parallel to marriage, in any case. It is just establishing that servant leadership or oversight, is not conflicting with mutual submission.
I do think they're different. While there is mutual submission between ministers and people on a personal level, the dynamic of church leadership is not simply one of mutual submission. There is a role distinction, and different responsibilities, even legally speaking.

To give an example of the sort of thing I mean; in Australia there are various laws around child safety which means that people who take on particular roles must comply with various forms of screening. I have had to tell people unwilling to so comply, that they simply cannot take on those roles. That is not a mutual-submission dynamic. But, while I have that kind of authority (and legal accountability) about who gets to sing in the choir, my authority in that kind of way doesn't extend past the church door.
 
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tall73

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With that in mind, I will now jump back to address the creation account and fall. Thank you for laying out your view thoroughly.

The Creation stories is a rebuttal of the creation stories in the ancient times. We know they had quite interesting theories regarding Creation. Every nation did, some African creation stories are very interesting.

I have read several creation account parallels. but have not done a lot of study on the subject. It is possible that the two creation accounts in Genesis critique notions in these stories. If you have a reference that would be an interesting read. We have precedents of God using both polemic and action against the gods. The plagues against Egypt seemed tailored to strike at notions regarding the Egyptian gods, various passages against the powerlessness of idols, etc.

I am not sure of your view of whether the account is literal, or expressing something more symbolic. I take the account as literal, due to references in the Scriptures to Adam, Eve, Jesus quoting of Genesis in reference to marriage, etc.

Israel's God and ours we know spoke everything into existence and formed humanity (adam) from the earth (adama). First all the spaces then the things that would fill them. Tim Mackie does a great job explaining this concept.

Every space was filled with something, sky was made for birds, seas was made for fish, land for creatures. But what fills humanity is God's breath. Both male and female.

He gave them both the commission of being fruitful and multiplying, both were to rule. I don't see anywhere in the text that it is only man and that he ruled over her.. verse 27 and 30 are to them/they. When he created humanity they had purpose and His creation was good.

Genesis 1
26 Then God said, “Let Us make man in Our image, according to Our likeness; let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, and over the cattle, over all the earth and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth.” 27 So God created man in His own image; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them. 28 Then God blessed them, and God said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply; fill the earth and subdue it; have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, and over every living thing that moves on the earth.”
29 And God said, “See, I have given you every herb that yields seed which is on the face of all the earth, and every tree whose fruit yields seed; to you it shall be for food. 30 Also, to every beast of the earth, to every bird of the air, and to everything that creeps on the earth, in which there is life, I have given every green herb for food”; and it was so. 31 Then God saw everything that He had made, and indeed it was very good. So the evening and the morning were the sixth day. (NKJV)

We agree so far.

Genesis 1 shows their relation to creation. Both man and woman are in God's image, distinguished from the rest of creation. Both are given dominion over the earth, and the commission to be frutful and multiply.

Jesus references the passage:

Matthew 19:4
4 And He answered and said to them, “Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning made them male and female, (NKJV)


Genesis 2 on the otherhand is a zoomed in version of the day He made humanity.

On first glance of this passage it appears as if the man is made then later out of the ground comes animals and trees. So which is it?

We see a lot of somewhat explanatory interjections in Genesis that don't match up with the timing of the event being related, or add extra info, so it does get a bit complicated. In the third chapter, for instance, in the middle of the curse/expulsion narrative there is the interjection explaining that Adam called his wife's name Eve, because she was the mother of all the living. It seems likely the actual naming came a bit later.

Genesis 3:19-24
9 In the sweat of your face you shall eat bread
Till you return to the ground,
For out of it you were taken;
For dust you are,
And to dust you shall return.”
20 And Adam called his wife’s name Eve, because she was the mother of all living.
21 Also for Adam and his wife the LORD God made tunics of skin, and clothed them.
22 Then the LORD God said, “Behold, the man has become like one of Us, to know good and evil. And now, lest he put out his hand and take also of the tree of life, and eat, and live forever”— 23 therefore the LORD God sent him out of the garden of Eden to till the ground from which he was taken. 24 So He drove out the man; and He placed cherubim at the east of the garden of Eden, and a flaming sword which turned every way, to guard the way to the tree of life.

Then you even have some that refer to far later times, in the Israelite context. For example:

Genesis 36:31
31 Now these were the kings who reigned in the land of Edom before any king reigned over the children of Israel.

Given that God commands Moses to write certain aspects in Exodus, and reference to Moses by later authors, I still take him to be the primary author of the Pentateuch, with some apparent compiling of narratives. As it turns out @Adventist Heretic has been looking into various suggestions of source material in Genesis.

In any case, I would take the reference to the animals being formed as a case of the reverse of the Eve statement, being pointed out as a fact, now that it applied during the naming.

The immediate context determines the meaning, the previous verse tells us man was alone, it's not good, he needs a suitable help (ezer kenegov).

I understand the following passage is trying to show us that everything else created was not a suitable helper. God did a lineup and nothing that existed would do. Until one is created to suit Adam.

Taken from his side. God created someone who would be able to co-rule. As I don't see anywhere in the creation text the concept of ruling over woman.

Genesis 2:15-20
15 Then the LORD God took the man and put him in the garden of Eden to tend and keep it. 16 And the LORD God commanded the man, saying, “Of every tree of the garden you may freely eat; 17 but of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat, for in the day that you eat of it you shall surely die.”
18 And the LORD God said, “It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.” 19 Out of the ground the LORD God formed every beast of the field and every bird of the air, and brought them to Adam to see what he would call them. And whatever Adam called each living creature, that was its name. 20 So Adam gave names to all cattle, to the birds of the air, and to every beast of the field. But for Adam there was not found a helper comparable to him.

This is where I think we will diverge a bit. I seee elements in the account, but also additional commentary on the accounts, that indicate headship prior to the fall, in chapter 2. We agree, however, that "ruling over" is not indicated until the fall.

The first element that warrants mentioning is that Adam is created first. He also receives the commandment regarding the tree, names the animals, etc. all prior to Eve being formed.

As was pointed out earlier in the thread, this is referenced in the 1 Timothy 2 account.

There is a hierarchical relationship in their origin: "For it was Adam who was first created, and then Eve." (1 Tim. 2:13)

Paul, as an apostle, interprets the passage, tying back to creation, and to a woman being in submission.

1 Timothy 2:11-13
11 Let a woman learn in silence with all submission. 12 And I do not permit a woman to teach or to have authority over a man, but to be in silence. 13 For Adam was formed first, then Eve.

And a related argument is given in I Corinthians 11, in a passage dealing with headship language.

1 Corinthians 11:3
3 But I want you to know that the head of every man is Christ, the head of woman is man, and the head of Christ is God.

1 Corinthians 11
8 For man is not from woman, but woman from man.

The next indication comes from verse 9 of I Corinthians 11.

1 Corinthians 11:9 Nor was man created for the woman, but woman for the man

I think usage rules out the notion that the term translated "helper" in Genesis is a technical term indicating submission. In use it refers to various types of helpers, with the most common referring to God.


The narrative relates that is not good for man to be alone, that no suitable helper was found in the line-up, as you put it. However, Paul spells out further what the narrative relates. Eve is a suitable helper for him, in God's image, but the woman was stated to be created for man in connection with the headship theme.

Even here Paul is cautious to show balance, noting that Eve was very much God's intention for Adam, and they are not independent of one another, hearkening back to the shared missions of fruitfulness, and dominion over creation of chapter 1.

1 Corinthians 11
11 Nevertheless, in the Lord woman is not independent of man nor man of woman; 12 for as woman was made from man, so man is now born of woman. And all things are from God.


We know the animals and plants were created first, thereafter Adam. Yet God brought them to Adam who read them and called them assigning to them a name according to its uniqueness. The calling and naming was directly related to finding a creation that was uniquely suitable to him. Bone of my bone, flesh of my flesh, woman- a suitable one, able to do with him, what God purposed for them in Genesis 1.

Yes, but in this narrative again we see a sign of Adam's headship, in that he names not only the animals prior to Eve's being formed, but also names the woman as well.


Genesis 2
21 So the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and while he slept took one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh. 22 And the rib that the LORD God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man. 23 Then the man said,
“This at last is bone of my bones
and flesh of my flesh;
she shall be called Woman,
because she was taken out of Man.”
24 Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. 25 And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed.

And not only does he name the woman, but, as we already saw, he names Eve in particular as well:

Genesis 3:20 And Adam called his wife’s name Eve, because she was the mother of all living.

Paul refers to the two becoming one flesh in his discussiong of headship in Ephesians 5.

Ephesians 5:22-24
22 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.

Ephesians 5:29-33
29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, 30 because we are members of his body. 31 “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” 32 This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. 33 However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.


Though certainly he indicates that the primary argument refers to Christ and the church, but the simile also compares it to the husband and wife. The husband and wife also are one flesh.

But just as Christ is the head of the church, so man is said to be head of the wife (which as we saw was already indicated in I Corinthians 11 as well).

So in three different contexts Paul draws on the Eden account, in connection with submission, headship, etc. He is not just appealing to Roman, or Jewish culture of the first century.

Moving on to chapter 3, we again see indications of prior headship.

Genesis 3:6
6 So when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, that it was pleasant to the eyes, and a tree desirable to make one wise, she took of its fruit and ate. She also gave to her husband with her, and he ate.

As I think came up earlier in the thread, Adam appears to have been with Eve when she took of the fruit and ate. Later he tries to blame Eve, or God, depending on how you take it, since God gave Eve to Adam. But we see in the confrontation of the two Adam is addressed first as the responsible party:

Genesis 3:9-13
9 Then the LORD God called to Adam and said to him, “Where are you?”
10 So he said, “I heard Your voice in the garden, and I was afraid because I was naked; and I hid myself.”
11 And He said, “Who told you that you were naked? Have you eaten from the tree of which I commanded you that you should not eat?”

Eve had eaten the fruit first, but God calls Adam to account, as the head who was present for the whole thing, and yet who ate.

And again we have New Testament commentary on Adam's greater responsibility. Both ate, but Adam was responsible for sin entering the world, and death coming to all men. While Adam is also the word for man, in this case it is one man, singled out to be Adam.

Romans 5:12-17
12 Therefore, just as through one man sin entered the world, and death through sin, and thus death spread to all men, because all sinned— 13 (For until the law sin was in the world, but sin is not imputed when there is no law. 14 Nevertheless death reigned from Adam to Moses, even over those who had not sinned according to the likeness of the transgression of Adam, who is a type of Him who was to come. 15 But the free gift is not like the offense. For if by the one man’s offense many died, much more the grace of God and the gift by the grace of the one Man, Jesus Christ, abounded to many. 16 And the gift is not like that which came through the one who sinned. For the judgment which came from one offense resulted in condemnation, but the free gift which came from many offenses resulted in justification. 17 For if by the one man’s offense death reigned through the one, much more those who receive abundance of grace and of the gift of righteousness will reign in life through the One, Jesus Christ.) (NKJV)

Returning to the Genesis narrative:

Genesis 3:12 Then the man said, “The woman whom You gave to be with me, she gave me of the tree, and I ate.”
13 And the LORD God said to the woman, “What is this you have done?”
The woman said, “The serpent deceived me, and I ate.” (NKJV)

This is a good point to mention that this is the first dissension between Adam and Eve, with the introduction of sin. While there was headship already in the garden, there was no sin, no strife.

The curses also indicate the prior state of things, and the new changed state.

Genesis 3
16 To the woman He said:
“I will greatly multiply your sorrow and your conception;
In pain you shall bring forth children;
Your desire shall be for your husband,
And he shall rule over you.”

17 Then to Adam He said, “Because you have heeded the voice of your wife, and have eaten from the tree of which I commanded you, saying, ‘You shall not eat of it’:
“Cursed is the ground for your sake;
In toil you shall eat of it
All the days of your life.
18 Both thorns and thistles it shall bring forth for you,
And you shall eat the herb of the field.
19 In the sweat of your face you shall eat bread
Till you return to the ground,
For out of it you were taken;
For dust you are,
And to dust you shall return.”

The curses are all related to prior states. The command to be fruitful and multiply is still present, and still good, but now will be with sorrow.

The previously assigned task of tending the garden, the trees, etc. is now made more difficult as well:

Genesis 2:15
15 Then the LORD God took the man and put him in the garden of Eden to tend and keep it.


Genesis 3

“Cursed is the ground for your sake;
In toil you shall eat of it
All the days of your life.
18 Both thorns and thistles it shall bring forth for you,
And you shall eat the herb of the field.

Similarly, the headship of Adam is still present, but with the introduction of sin is now characterized as ruling over:

Your desire shall be for your husband,
And he shall rule over you.

And just as Paul pointed out in Romans 5, the curse of death is related to Adam, the head, through whom death came.

Genesis 3
17 Then to Adam He said, “Because you have heeded the voice of your wife, and have eaten from the tree of which I commanded you, saying, ‘You shall not eat of it’:
“Cursed is the ground for your sake;
In toil you shall eat of it
All the days of your life.
18 Both thorns and thistles it shall bring forth for you,
And you shall eat the herb of the field.
19 In the sweat of your face you shall eat bread
Till you return to the ground,
For out of it you were taken;
For dust you are,
And to dust you shall return.”


The various passages in Ephesians, 1 Peter, Colossians, 1 Timothy, 1 Corinthians, etc. do not just refer to Roman culture, but a pre-existing headship. And references to Eden, the holy women of old, to submission as is fitting to the Lord, etc. are with this prior headship in mind.

The harsh rule of the husband over the wife is eliminated with the removal of the curse. The Christian husband is to follow the example of the second Adam with His bride the church, and to love His wife as Christ loved the church, giving himself up for it.

This is why New Testament Apostles, after the changes Jesus brought in the treatment of women, are still speaking of headship, submission in all things. But it is not harsh, and should as much as possible be like in the garden, with no division or sin. It is servant leadership, imitating Christ.
 
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Rose_bud

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Nor does it mean that all the members of the flock are left out of leading in various capacities, or exercising gifts. All contribute to the edifying of the body.

11 And He Himself gave some to be apostles, some prophets, some evangelists, and some pastors and teachers, 12 for the equipping of the saints for the work of ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ, 13 till we all come to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to a perfect man, to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ; 14 that we should no longer be children, tossed to and fro and carried about with every wind of doctrine, by the trickery of men, in the cunning craftiness of deceitful plotting, 15 but, speaking the truth in love, may grow up in all things into Him who is the head—Christ— 16 from whom the whole body, joined and knit together by what every joint supplies, according to the effective working by which every part does its share, causes growth of the body for the edifying of itself in love. (NKJV)​

All work together for the gospel:

27 Only let your conduct be worthy of the gospel of Christ, so that whether I come and see you or am absent, I may hear of your affairs, that you stand fast in one spirit, with one mind striving together for the faith of the gospel, 28 and not in any way terrified by your adversaries, which is to them a proof of perdition, but to you of salvation, and that from God. 29 For to you it has been granted on behalf of Christ, not only to believe in Him, but also to suffer for His sake, 30 having the same conflict which you saw in me and now hear is in me. (NKJV)​
:wave:

My view on leadership and in light of the scriptures you posted.

Leadership is a gift given to Christ's body so it may grow and mature into fullness. Whether to the church as we know it or in a marriage. It is not dependant on gender, race or class. It is the generosity of God dispensed to His people.
 
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Rose_bud

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@tall73
I would like to respond to your post #276. It is lengthy and will take some time, especially since you are moving to the passages in Timothy and Corinthians which I was going to cover in moving through the biblical approach.

But would like to know before I proceed, how you practice headship?. I believe we reached consensus on mutual submission, which you indicated you do practice.
 
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tall73

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@tall73
I would like to respond to your post #276. It is lengthy and will take some time, especially since you are moving to the passages in Timothy and Corinthians which I was going to cover in moving through the biblical approach.

That is fine, and yes, it is lengthy.

That is part of why I was trying to hold off on the discussion of the creation texts until you had finished the other posts, as there is overlap, due to Paul's references. However, since I was requested to go over the material, I did so.


But would like to know before I proceed, how you practice headship?. I believe we reached consensus on mutual submission, which you indicated you do practice.
[/QUOTE]

Yes, and the reason I think that you indicated it sounds like I am an egalitarian is because I view the curse bringing strife to the existing relationship, which I see was headship. But both sides should agree that ruling over is part of the curse, brought on by sin, and is not desirable.

I mentioned my wife and I discussing, and we couldn't recall a time I had ordered her to do anything. Because I see the husband's role described in terms of servant leadership, somewhat akin, but obviously in a different sphere, to church leaders. The same elements are present.

Submission
Submission to the headship is called for from the wife, as it is the members of the church to elders. It is compared to the headship of Christ over the body. You mentioned that we agree Christ is at the helm. Yes, we do. But the text still indicates that the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church. Obviously any role the husband has is directed by Christ, and all members of the body of Christ submit to Him, and His will. So Christ is at the helm, but he still says the husband has a role, and the wife is to submit to that role of headship.

Servant leadership
The husband is exhorted at length to lay down his life for the wife, love her as he loves his own body. More on this later as I have to get to work soon, but this is not just a concession to Roman culture, but is a reversal of the state of affairs from the time of the fall, and hence, a reversal of the curse which brought strife to begin with.

Accountability.
Peter notes that God will hold husbands accountable if they do not treat their spouse, a co-heir of life, with honor, as the weaker vessel. They are not to live out the curse. They are to build her up, that their prayers are not hindered.

So in practice, I don't intend to micro-manage my wife. She has leadership in various areas in the family, outside of the family, etc. She is in God's image, a co-heir of life, and she shares in the commands to be fruitful, and to have dominion over the earth.

We talk through decisions, and make them together.

Nor does this rule out wives appealing to husbands or correcting husbands by Scripture, etc.

But I do see that husbands will be held to account for their headship over the family, whether they built it up, and Peter indicates part of that happens even now.
 
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Paidiske

Clara bonam audax
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But I do see that husbands will be held to account for their headship over the family, whether they built it up,
So in your view, is that all that headship is? It does not entail any actual difference in behaviour between husbands and wives? (Since of course wives and mothers also are to serve and build up their households).

It is difficult to see what this means for the marriage relationship beyond the mutual submission we all agree on.
 
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