anxiety...

[lovesbrightpink]

Today I have really bad anxiety. My fiance just told me that his weight...he is a bit overweight. May effect his job because he cant do it. When ever anything happens that is involving him and this job I get suicidal. I had to go through some bad times with his depression and I feel like if this job doesnt work out that he will get depressed again. And if he gets depressed again...im not sure that I can hold on as strong as I was. I am still broken from it and it was almost 2 months ago. Any little upsetting thought leads to me thinking about suicide of cutting. I used to cut but I havnt for a year.

I just dont know what is wrong with me. I just feel broken...and alone...and like im not gonna make it too much further.

 

[Dworkin]

Howdy there. First try to take things in steps. To quote some book "don't sweat the small stuff". Are you on any medication? I know that I take Xanax for my anxiety, and it seems to work for me. Have you talked to a counselor?

 

[squigglemonster]

Nicole, have you talked to your fiance about how you feel? I am sure, if he is already willing to make the committment of being your husband, he cares so much about you and your health and your well-being. Talk to him about it, see if you can lean on each other during this time.

He might not be very happy at his weight interferring with his work. To help distract you from bad feelings, could you help him with a diet? I did this a few weeks ago, I was in a really bad place, but I concentrated my energy to helping my partner lose weight (he was slightly overweight) and I have found that seeing him succeeding has made both him and me happier and more positive about the future.

Are you on medication? Have you spoken to anyone like a counsellor about this? I really think you should - just to get it out and have someone who can work through your thoughts and feelings with you, would be beneficial. Please consider talking to someone. Communication is the key.

Suicide is not going to make it better sweetie. Neither is cutting. Know that you have so so much support here and we are here for you if you ever need to talk, or rant, or rave, or just have a friend.

 

[lovesbrightpink]

I am helping him on a diet but he needs to lose like 30 pounds. And its hard when I am not with him at all until like 8 at night.

Im not on meds and havnt gone to talk to anyone. For a few reasons. Manly I dont want anyone telling me that something is wrong. I dont want to have to be on meds my entire life. But i know i need to

 

[praying]

I am helping him on a diet but he needs to lose like 30 pounds. And its hard when I am not with him at all until like 8 at night.

Im not on meds and havnt gone to talk to anyone. For a few reasons. Manly I dont want anyone telling me that something is wrong. I dont want to have to be on meds my entire life. But i know i need to

You may not need to be on meds for the rest of your life. My therapists asked me that, because I guess, though I never stated it quite as plainly as you , what does that mean f you have to take them for the rest of your life. For me I guess it felt like some sort of weakness but it isn't. If they help you and you feel better, more yourself, so what if you have to take them forever. One thing is for sure, you should at least try talking to someone, I can't tell you how effective it is to talk to someone who isn't part of your life about your issues. They can be completely objective. I found it to be really helpful, both therapy and medication.

 

[Dworkin]

I thought the same thing when I first had depression. I didn't want to admit there was a problem, and I didn't want to be on medication for my whole life. The truth is though, that if it makes you feel better, and allows you to lead a normal life then you should be on it. Believe me, it will make a BIG difference in your life. You will have us to help you though it all, so go make an appointment today.

 

[Amin]

Today I have really bad anxiety. My fiance just told me that his weight...he is a bit overweight. May effect his job because he cant do it. When ever anything happens that is involving him and this job I get suicidal. I had to go through some bad times with his depression and I feel like if this job doesnt work out that he will get depressed again. And if he gets depressed again...im not sure that I can hold on as strong as I was. I am still broken from it and it was almost 2 months ago. Any little upsetting thought leads to me thinking about suicide of cutting. I used to cut but I havnt for a year.

I just dont know what is wrong with me. I just feel broken...and alone...and like im not gonna make it too much further.

Hi,
That's the problem with anxiety. It causes us to fear, think things are going to happen to us, and it even makes ua feel like we're going to die. Maybe you and your fiance could help each other when times like these come about. Not only can you help one another but grow closer too. I have anxiety too. It was so bad at one point i couldn't be left alone, i was to fearful to be alone. eventually taking small steps in doing things i didn't do, helped me to regain some of my confidence. I pray the same might help you.
Chuck.

 

[whitedove7]

Hang in there. You are dealing with some fear issues that is causing your anxiety attacks. I used to have those things and when I learned that the Lord cared about every aspect of my life and that I could give my worries and concerns to him and leave them with him, in time I was able to find peace knowing that God is for me and not against me and that I can rest in him during hard times.

I will be praying that your boyfriend's weight won't be an issue. be at peace and know eveyrthing usually works out. Sometimes what is in front of us is scary but in Hebrews 11:1 1Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.

The things I cannot see, God working in my behalf, is eternal. The things that are in front of me usually works its way out in time. Sometimes there are mountains and stuff that causes problems but it is usually temporary. The things we cannot see, God working it out, is eternal and can bring peace.

He loves you with an everlasting love. Don't give in to cutting. I used to do that when I got overwhelmed and didn't wnat to feel the pain. Give your worries to him and allow him to bring you peace.

Peace be with you and I will b epraying for you.

 

[Frangible]

You are experiencing suicide ideation. You need immediate, professional help.

There is something wrong with you. You're human. And as a result of being human, your genetics, your environment, and your life, you're temporarily in a state of depression.

Severe depression, suicide ideation, cutting, and anxiety disorders are not something that can be cured on a message board.

The cause of anxiety is attachment to an uncertain outcome. Know this: there is no uncertain outcome in professional help. No one will judge you, humiliate you, think you are a bad person, or weird, etc.

Here's the likely outcome of the treatment you receive from professional help: your moods become more stable. You stop having suicide ideation and cutting. You remember you are connected, loved, and don't feel alone. The despair diminishes. Instead of pain, you can see beauty, joy, enjoyment, in things like you used to. The anxiety lessens, and you can shrug off things that aren't really a big deal. People around you enjoy being around you more, because without the darkness of depression clouding your mind you are free to be the person you truly are. Your fiancee's mood improves because you can better express your love for him.

Or, you can not get help. Your pain will continue. Perhaps it will lessen in time. Perhaps it will get worse. All for what? All of this suffering, for yourself and everyone you love, because you worry about being judged by a single doctor? Do you truly think a mental health care professional will think ill of you for supporting their profession, giving them a job, putting food on their table? They want to help you or they wouldn't have trained to do so!

You are in a very dark place. You deserve better. And this messageboard can't give that you. Go find your yellow pages. Call a psychiatrist. They can give you medication that will ease so much of the pain immediately, and treat it long term. Combined with behavioral approaches, every day after today can be better for you-- and better for the people you love.

One suggestion-- you will be nervous talking to a doctor you've just met. This is normal. Write down everything you've said here, print it out-- don't leave ANYTHING out-- they must know the true extent and severity of this! It is nothing to be ashamed of, they need to have the facts to prescribe the right medication and treatment. Since you have anxiety issues, write down everything BEFORE going in that you need to say, and give that to the doctor.

One call is all it truly takes, to make every day after today better for you and everyone you love. Please, make that call. You deserve better than to feel such pain. Realize your love for others, your love for yourself, the love of others for you, by overcoming your misconceptions and fear and starting the healing process. You need to do this. Now. Call and leave a message, if it is after hours. Do not delay, because when you are in such a dark place, you cannot afford to.

Remember-- you are loved, you are not alone, you deserve happiness, and you can obtain it through the right action and effort.

 

[Amin]

Today I have really bad anxiety. My fiance just told me that his weight...he is a bit overweight. May effect his job because he cant do it. When ever anything happens that is involving him and this job I get suicidal. I had to go through some bad times with his depression and I feel like if this job doesnt work out that he will get depressed again. And if he gets depressed again...im not sure that I can hold on as strong as I was. I am still broken from it and it was almost 2 months ago. Any little upsetting thought leads to me thinking about suicide of cutting. I used to cut but I havnt for a year.

I just dont know what is wrong with me. I just feel broken...and alone...and like im not gonna make it too much further.

Hi,
Haven't heard from you in a while and was wondering how you're doing?
I hope things are a little better for you.
Chuck.

 

[redman7353]

Anxiety is a terrible thing to suffer alone. At least try to tell some people you trust so that they can help you in your struggle.

I am rooting for you.
-redman

 

[lovesbrightpink]

Im doing well, well probably better. I have managed to get sad without feelings suicidal a few times. My fiance is depressed again, but its not his weight anymore. He lost that job, his dream job because of his anxiety and depression, not because he couldnt do it. He has a new job now, its his 2nd day. The first day was fine, he was not really nervous or anything, but today he wants to leave. Its not that its a bad job, its a pretty easy job its that he feels alone. It urts me because he isnt alone he has me, I feel like I am not doing a good enough job being there for him if he feel so alone. I am trying to get him to the doctor to get meds but we have no insurance at all. The clinic takes forever to be seen, its just hard. He needs so much help and Im so scared that he will break before we get help.

 

[Amin]

Im doing well, well probably better. I have managed to get sad without feelings suicidal a few times. My fiance is depressed again, but its not his weight anymore. He lost that job, his dream job because of his anxiety and depression, not because he couldnt do it. He has a new job now, its his 2nd day. The first day was fine, he was not really nervous or anything, but today he wants to leave. Its not that its a bad job, its a pretty easy job its that he feels alone. It urts me because he isnt alone he has me, I feel like I am not doing a good enough job being there for him if he feel so alone. I am trying to get him to the doctor to get meds but we have no insurance at all. The clinic takes forever to be seen, its just hard. He needs so much help and Im so scared that he will break before we get help.

I wouldn't think that you weren't doing a good job in being there. You know how depression makes you feel. It could be the depression causing these things, and with anxiety makes it double trouble.
Chuck.