When a Banker jumps out of a window, jump after him -- that's where the
money is.
-- Robespierre
"A witty saying proves nothing."
-- Voltaire
I believe in getting into hot water; it keeps you clean.
-- G. K. Chesterton
The shortest distance between two points is under construction.
-- Noelie Altito
A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that
you will look forward to the trip.
-- unknown
You've been leading a dog's life. Stay off the furniture.
Good day for overcoming obstacles. Try a steeplechase.
I haven't lost my mind; I know exactly where I left it.
Anything that is good and useful is made of chocolate.
Never drink coke in a moving elevator. The elevator's motion coupled
with the chemicals in coke produce hallucinations. People tend to
change into lizards and attack without warning, and large bats usually
fly in the window. Additionally, you begin to believe that elevators
have windows.
If you think last Tuesday was a drag, wait till you see what happens
tomorrow!
I generally avoid temptation unless I can't resist it.
-- Mae West
What good is a ticket to the good life, if you can't find the
entrance?
The human race has one really effective weapon, and that is laughter.
-- Mark Twain
Conversation, n.:
A vocal competition in which the one who is catching his breath
is called the listener.
As of next week, passwords will be entered in Morse code.
All true wisdom is found on T-shirts.
When in doubt, use brute force.
-- Ken Thompson
That woman speaks eight languages and can't say "no" in any of them.
-- Dorothy Parker
Good day to let down old friends who need help.
You have the capacity to learn from mistakes. You'll learn a lot
today.
Overdrawn? But I still have checks left!
Next to being shot at and missed, nothing is really quite as satisfying
as an income tax refund.
-- F. J. Raymond
Amnesia used to be my favorite word, but then I forgot it.
Going to church does not make a person religious, nor does going to
school make a person educated, any more than going to a garage makes a
person a car.
Yes, but every time I try to see things your way, I get a headache.
Fine day to throw a party. Throw him as far as you can.
I like your game but we have to change the rules.
Blessed are they who Go Around in Circles, for they Shall be Known
as Wheels.
A student who changes the course of history is probably taking an
exam.
If at first you don't succeed, redefine success.
All things are possible except skiing thru a revolving door.
"Adopted kids are such a pain -- you have to teach them how to look
like you ..."
--- Gilda Radner
A day without sunshine is like night.
Xerox does it again and again and again and ...
If money can't buy happiness, I guess you'll just have to rent it.
All I ask is a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
He looked at me as if I was a side dish he hadn't ordered.
Beware of low-flying butterflies.
Laugh at your problems; everybody else does.
Your lucky number is 3552664958674928. Watch for it everywhere!
Take everything in stride. Trample anyone who gets in your way.
Okay... I'll stop now...
money is.
-- Robespierre
"A witty saying proves nothing."
-- Voltaire
I believe in getting into hot water; it keeps you clean.
-- G. K. Chesterton
The shortest distance between two points is under construction.
-- Noelie Altito
A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that
you will look forward to the trip.
-- unknown
You've been leading a dog's life. Stay off the furniture.
Good day for overcoming obstacles. Try a steeplechase.
I haven't lost my mind; I know exactly where I left it.
Anything that is good and useful is made of chocolate.
Never drink coke in a moving elevator. The elevator's motion coupled
with the chemicals in coke produce hallucinations. People tend to
change into lizards and attack without warning, and large bats usually
fly in the window. Additionally, you begin to believe that elevators
have windows.
If you think last Tuesday was a drag, wait till you see what happens
tomorrow!
I generally avoid temptation unless I can't resist it.
-- Mae West
What good is a ticket to the good life, if you can't find the
entrance?
The human race has one really effective weapon, and that is laughter.
-- Mark Twain
Conversation, n.:
A vocal competition in which the one who is catching his breath
is called the listener.
As of next week, passwords will be entered in Morse code.
All true wisdom is found on T-shirts.
When in doubt, use brute force.
-- Ken Thompson
That woman speaks eight languages and can't say "no" in any of them.
-- Dorothy Parker
Good day to let down old friends who need help.
You have the capacity to learn from mistakes. You'll learn a lot
today.
Overdrawn? But I still have checks left!
Next to being shot at and missed, nothing is really quite as satisfying
as an income tax refund.
-- F. J. Raymond
Amnesia used to be my favorite word, but then I forgot it.
Going to church does not make a person religious, nor does going to
school make a person educated, any more than going to a garage makes a
person a car.
Yes, but every time I try to see things your way, I get a headache.
Fine day to throw a party. Throw him as far as you can.
I like your game but we have to change the rules.
Blessed are they who Go Around in Circles, for they Shall be Known
as Wheels.
A student who changes the course of history is probably taking an
exam.
If at first you don't succeed, redefine success.
All things are possible except skiing thru a revolving door.
"Adopted kids are such a pain -- you have to teach them how to look
like you ..."
--- Gilda Radner
A day without sunshine is like night.
Xerox does it again and again and again and ...
If money can't buy happiness, I guess you'll just have to rent it.
All I ask is a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
He looked at me as if I was a side dish he hadn't ordered.
Beware of low-flying butterflies.
Laugh at your problems; everybody else does.
Your lucky number is 3552664958674928. Watch for it everywhere!
Take everything in stride. Trample anyone who gets in your way.
Okay... I'll stop now...
