To begin, my husband and I have been together for 14 years, married for 6. We are best friends and love each other very much.
My husband has always had a short temper. He has never hit me or verbally attacked me or anyone else.
He was been through a lot of hard times in life and has struggled with depression and anxiety in the past. He has been on medication for it for several years now. However, in the last year he has only held a job for 5 months. He has anxieties and depression that cripples him so much that he cannot get the motivation to do work or do anything around the house.
He has little to no sex drive and has shown very little intimacy toward me in months. He has recently even cringed or huffed when I go to hug or kiss him. He does still tell me he loves me and that he knows he is letting me down.
He has told me he hates himself, thinks of himself as worthless, and has wanted to hurt himself. He has also told me the only reason he stays alive is because of me and his niece and nephews.
He recently got so upset and frustrated with his emotions that he punched a cement wall, hurting his hand badly. He has been so desperate for relief from his anxieties and depression that he has started smoking marijuana illegally. (Which bothers me for so many different reasons including; his family history of drug addiction, the fact that he is active as a role model for children and that I am a teacher.)
I have been trying to be supportive. I have been understanding and patient with him. Encouraging him and showing as little judgement as possible.
My question is, am I giving him what he needs? Should I be more rigid with him? I can see him falling deeper and I don't know what to do to help bring him back up.
He has recenlty seen his G.P. , has gotten different prescriptions and will be starting therapy in a week.
He recently left with his best friend/cousin to spend some time together. What worries me is he is starting new prescriptions, is very emotional, and insisted on going to visit his cousin for a week - nearly 500 miles away. (This cousin happens to be the one that provided him with marijuana in the first place.) I am so concerned with his state of mind and emotional state.
Any thoughts or feedback on how to handle this situation? I feel so helpless.
My husband has always had a short temper. He has never hit me or verbally attacked me or anyone else.
He was been through a lot of hard times in life and has struggled with depression and anxiety in the past. He has been on medication for it for several years now. However, in the last year he has only held a job for 5 months. He has anxieties and depression that cripples him so much that he cannot get the motivation to do work or do anything around the house.
He has little to no sex drive and has shown very little intimacy toward me in months. He has recently even cringed or huffed when I go to hug or kiss him. He does still tell me he loves me and that he knows he is letting me down.
He has told me he hates himself, thinks of himself as worthless, and has wanted to hurt himself. He has also told me the only reason he stays alive is because of me and his niece and nephews.
He recently got so upset and frustrated with his emotions that he punched a cement wall, hurting his hand badly. He has been so desperate for relief from his anxieties and depression that he has started smoking marijuana illegally. (Which bothers me for so many different reasons including; his family history of drug addiction, the fact that he is active as a role model for children and that I am a teacher.)
I have been trying to be supportive. I have been understanding and patient with him. Encouraging him and showing as little judgement as possible.
My question is, am I giving him what he needs? Should I be more rigid with him? I can see him falling deeper and I don't know what to do to help bring him back up.
He has recenlty seen his G.P. , has gotten different prescriptions and will be starting therapy in a week.
He recently left with his best friend/cousin to spend some time together. What worries me is he is starting new prescriptions, is very emotional, and insisted on going to visit his cousin for a week - nearly 500 miles away. (This cousin happens to be the one that provided him with marijuana in the first place.) I am so concerned with his state of mind and emotional state.
Any thoughts or feedback on how to handle this situation? I feel so helpless.
