Already failed first day of Lent

[Lady Bug]

I did a fantastic job of not starting off Lent well. The one thing I think I might be able to do is not eat meat except fish. However, I already failed at what I vowed to sacrifice:

- Fasting: I thought that if fasting felt hard for me, that I'd refrain from the internet for 24 hours, except email and streaming the evening news. Well, that didn't work. Unfortunately there was something I really wanted to look up on the internet and I didn't want to wait 24 hours, unfortunately, because I didn't want it to go out of stock.
- Online shopping: What I said above led into this. I thought I finished my "fat Tuesday shopping" so that I would be free of it for the rest of Lent, but it turned out that something that was delivered to my house, didn't satisfy me, so I went to this site to order something else (as a replacement) so that it wouldn't be out of stock once the end of Lent ensued.
- Social media (FB, Reddit): so far, not caving, but it's amazing how much I want to cave, considering when it was NOT Lent, I had NO desire to use it at ALL. I could go the ENTIRE day without an inclination to use either. Now I'm going crazy without them. This is ridiculous.

I've been missing most of Mass since post-Christmas, and now due to an ice storm that is sure to come (it's a warning, not a watch), I'm missing my first Ash Wednesday (I'm glad that's not a Holy Day of Obligation, though). I had also "missed" All Saints Day. I'm not doing a good job of being Catholic. The thing is, my missing Masses doesn't have to do with lack of interest. I'm having a sleeping issue that I don't feel like elaborating on. I don't have trouble falling asleep (I take Trazadone) but I have trouble getting consistent sleep and sleeping at the right times. I thought that since Mama passed, that would be some opportunity to no longer stay up all night and sleep in the day, but I have not improved on it. And it's taking a heavy toll on my Mass attendance. I know the optimal way to take care of that is to not sleep at all when I normally sleep and try to stay up all day until I finally get tired at the typical time that people are supposed to get tired and go to bed, but I'm worried that won't work either. That sounds like a brutal strategy but I've tried incrementally sleeping earlier and I keep falling back into the same dreaded routine.

Is it OK to call myself a Catholic even if I'm a bad Catholic? I'm not feeling much of a Catholic; I almost feel as if I have no right to attend Church anymore. It's weird.

 

[WarriorAngel]

I did a fantastic job of not starting off Lent well. The one thing I think I might be able to do is not eat meat except fish. However, I already failed at what I vowed to sacrifice:

- Fasting: I thought that if fasting felt hard for me, that I'd refrain from the internet for 24 hours, except email and streaming the evening news. Well, that didn't work. Unfortunately there was something I really wanted to look up on the internet and I didn't want to wait 24 hours, unfortunately, because I didn't want it to go out of stock.
- Online shopping: What I said above led into this. I thought I finished my "fat Tuesday shopping" so that I would be free of it for the rest of Lent, but it turned out that something that was delivered to my house, didn't satisfy me, so I went to this site to order something else (as a replacement) so that it wouldn't be out of stock once the end of Lent ensued.
- Social media (FB, Reddit): so far, not caving, but it's amazing how much I want to cave, considering when it was NOT Lent, I had NO desire to use it at ALL. I could go the ENTIRE day without an inclination to use either. Now I'm going crazy without them. This is ridiculous.

I've been missing most of Mass since post-Christmas, and now due to an ice storm that is sure to come (it's a warning, not a watch), I'm missing my first Ash Wednesday (I'm glad that's not a Holy Day of Obligation, though). I had also "missed" All Saints Day. I'm not doing a good job of being Catholic. The thing is, my missing Masses doesn't have to do with lack of interest. I'm having a sleeping issue that I don't feel like elaborating on. I don't have trouble falling asleep (I take Trazadone) but I have trouble getting consistent sleep and sleeping at the right times. I thought that since Mama passed, that would be some opportunity to no longer stay up all night and sleep in the day, but I have not improved on it. And it's taking a heavy toll on my Mass attendance. I know the optimal way to take care of that is to not sleep at all when I normally sleep and try to stay up all day until I finally get tired at the typical time that people are supposed to get tired and go to bed, but I'm worried that won't work either. That sounds like a brutal strategy but I've tried incrementally sleeping earlier and I keep falling back into the same dreaded routine.

Is it OK to call myself a Catholic even if I'm a bad Catholic? I'm not feeling much of a Catholic; I almost feel as if I have no right to attend Church anymore. It's weird.

Drink coffee in the day. Or energy drinks [?] and sleep at night.
Never easy changing schedules but effort pays off.

We have evening Ash Wed Mass here.

Pray - pray for inspiration and graces and help.
He already knows the issues better than you do. Now literally trust He will help you.

 

[Susie~Q]

I did a fantastic job of not starting off Lent well. The one thing I think I might be able to do is not eat meat except fish. However, I already failed at what I vowed to sacrifice:

- Fasting: I thought that if fasting felt hard for me, that I'd refrain from the internet for 24 hours, except email and streaming the evening news. Well, that didn't work. Unfortunately there was something I really wanted to look up on the internet and I didn't want to wait 24 hours, unfortunately, because I didn't want it to go out of stock.
- Online shopping: What I said above led into this. I thought I finished my "fat Tuesday shopping" so that I would be free of it for the rest of Lent, but it turned out that something that was delivered to my house, didn't satisfy me, so I went to this site to order something else (as a replacement) so that it wouldn't be out of stock once the end of Lent ensued.
- Social media (FB, Reddit): so far, not caving, but it's amazing how much I want to cave, considering when it was NOT Lent, I had NO desire to use it at ALL. I could go the ENTIRE day without an inclination to use either. Now I'm going crazy without them. This is ridiculous.

I've been missing most of Mass since post-Christmas, and now due to an ice storm that is sure to come (it's a warning, not a watch), I'm missing my first Ash Wednesday (I'm glad that's not a Holy Day of Obligation, though). I had also "missed" All Saints Day. I'm not doing a good job of being Catholic. The thing is, my missing Masses doesn't have to do with lack of interest. I'm having a sleeping issue that I don't feel like elaborating on. I don't have trouble falling asleep (I take Trazadone) but I have trouble getting consistent sleep and sleeping at the right times. I thought that since Mama passed, that would be some opportunity to no longer stay up all night and sleep in the day, but I have not improved on it. And it's taking a heavy toll on my Mass attendance. I know the optimal way to take care of that is to not sleep at all when I normally sleep and try to stay up all day until I finally get tired at the typical time that people are supposed to get tired and go to bed, but I'm worried that won't work either. That sounds like a brutal strategy but I've tried incrementally sleeping earlier and I keep falling back into the same dreaded routine.

Is it OK to call myself a Catholic even if I'm a bad Catholic? I'm not feeling much of a Catholic; I almost feel as if I have no right to attend Church anymore. It's weird.

(((((hugs)))))The Lord knows your heart and that you are trying. As to wanting to be on the internet more than ever now but not caring before, well, I think it is because you feel you "have " to be off and that is making you want to be on it all the more.

Of course it is OK to call yourself a Catholic, we all have times of trouble when it seems we just can't do what we should do right, in fact, Paul even says in the bible Romans 7:15 " I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do". You most certainly have a right to attend church, Satan wants you to believe otherwise, now, of all times, you need to attend church to help with your issues, please don't let Satan deceive you into thinking otherwise.

 

[JSRG]

I've been missing most of Mass since post-Christmas, and now due to an ice storm that is sure to come (it's a warning, not a watch), I'm missing my first Ash Wednesday (I'm glad that's not a Holy Day of Obligation, though). I had also "missed" All Saints Day. I'm not doing a good job of being Catholic. The thing is, my missing Masses doesn't have to do with lack of interest. I'm having a sleeping issue that I don't feel like elaborating on. I don't have trouble falling asleep (I take Trazadone) but I have trouble getting consistent sleep and sleeping at the right times. I thought that since Mama passed, that would be some opportunity to no longer stay up all night and sleep in the day, but I have not improved on it. And it's taking a heavy toll on my Mass attendance. I know the optimal way to take care of that is to not sleep at all when I normally sleep and try to stay up all day until I finally get tired at the typical time that people are supposed to get tired and go to bed, but I'm worried that won't work either. That sounds like a brutal strategy but I've tried incrementally sleeping earlier and I keep falling back into the same dreaded routine.

If sleeping is the issue, have you considered going to masses later in the day? Although Sunday afternoon/evening masses aren't particularly common (looking it up, of the 100-something parishes in the diocese where I live, only 7 have Sunday evening masses), most parishes will have Saturday evening vigil masses, and I believe going to one of those counts as attending a Sunday mass.

 

[Lady Bug]

If sleeping is the issue, have you considered going to masses later in the day? Although Sunday afternoon/evening masses aren't particularly common (looking it up, of the 100-something parishes in the diocese where I live, only 7 have Sunday evening masses), most parishes will have Saturday evening vigil masses, and I believe going to one of those counts as attending a Sunday mass.

I hesitate to say too much because it would look absurd but it has come to the point where even the evening Masses have been adversely impacted.

 

[Valletta]

I hesitate to say too much because it would look absurd but it has come to the point where even the evening Masses have been adversely impacted.

I've had sleep issues myself. As a suggestion along the lines JSRG said, make yourself aware of the parishes you can attend, within driving distance, whatever, plan on getting to the Saturday vigil mass and if you are sleeping you will have a list of alternatives to try for. Does that make sense? No sense shooting for the latest mass first. Getting to church late too is far better than not attending. Perhaps you can ask a priest during confession for more suggestions.

 

[YeshuaFollower]

I did a fantastic job of not starting off Lent well. The one thing I think I might be able to do is not eat meat except fish. However, I already failed at what I vowed to sacrifice:

- Fasting: I thought that if fasting felt hard for me, that I'd refrain from the internet for 24 hours, except email and streaming the evening news. Well, that didn't work. Unfortunately there was something I really wanted to look up on the internet and I didn't want to wait 24 hours, unfortunately, because I didn't want it to go out of stock.
- Online shopping: What I said above led into this. I thought I finished my "fat Tuesday shopping" so that I would be free of it for the rest of Lent, but it turned out that something that was delivered to my house, didn't satisfy me, so I went to this site to order something else (as a replacement) so that it wouldn't be out of stock once the end of Lent ensued.
- Social media (FB, Reddit): so far, not caving, but it's amazing how much I want to cave, considering when it was NOT Lent, I had NO desire to use it at ALL. I could go the ENTIRE day without an inclination to use either. Now I'm going crazy without them. This is ridiculous.

I've been missing most of Mass since post-Christmas, and now due to an ice storm that is sure to come (it's a warning, not a watch), I'm missing my first Ash Wednesday (I'm glad that's not a Holy Day of Obligation, though). I had also "missed" All Saints Day. I'm not doing a good job of being Catholic. The thing is, my missing Masses doesn't have to do with lack of interest. I'm having a sleeping issue that I don't feel like elaborating on. I don't have trouble falling asleep (I take Trazadone) but I have trouble getting consistent sleep and sleeping at the right times. I thought that since Mama passed, that would be some opportunity to no longer stay up all night and sleep in the day, but I have not improved on it. And it's taking a heavy toll on my Mass attendance. I know the optimal way to take care of that is to not sleep at all when I normally sleep and try to stay up all day until I finally get tired at the typical time that people are supposed to get tired and go to bed, but I'm worried that won't work either. That sounds like a brutal strategy but I've tried incrementally sleeping earlier and I keep falling back into the same dreaded routine.

Is it OK to call myself a Catholic even if I'm a bad Catholic? I'm not feeling much of a Catholic; I almost feel as if e words of JesusI have no right to attend Church anymore. It's weird.

It is not important what denomination you are in or what you call yourself. it is important to do the will of GOD and follow the words of Jesus. What you have mentioned above is being part of a religion's ritual. there are many of those according to each denomination. as long as you strive to better yourself in the eyes of GOD, you will be fine.

Blessings,

JFF

 

[Anhelyna]

Lady Bug

I'm going to say something that no-one else seems to have done yet

Don't beat yourself up about this . Tomorrow is another day - just pick yourself up and start afresh

 

[Michie]

Lady Bug

I'm going to say something that no-one else seems to have done yet

Don't beat yourself up about this . Tomorrow is another day - just pick yourself up and start afresh

Amen.

 

[chevyontheriver]

I did a fantastic job of not starting off Lent well. The one thing I think I might be able to do is not eat meat except fish. However, I already failed at what I vowed to sacrifice:

- Fasting: I thought that if fasting felt hard for me, that I'd refrain from the internet for 24 hours, except email and streaming the evening news. Well, that didn't work. Unfortunately there was something I really wanted to look up on the internet and I didn't want to wait 24 hours, unfortunately, because I didn't want it to go out of stock.
- Online shopping: What I said above led into this. I thought I finished my "fat Tuesday shopping" so that I would be free of it for the rest of Lent, but it turned out that something that was delivered to my house, didn't satisfy me, so I went to this site to order something else (as a replacement) so that it wouldn't be out of stock once the end of Lent ensued.
- Social media (FB, Reddit): so far, not caving, but it's amazing how much I want to cave, considering when it was NOT Lent, I had NO desire to use it at ALL. I could go the ENTIRE day without an inclination to use either. Now I'm going crazy without them. This is ridiculous.

I've been missing most of Mass since post-Christmas, and now due to an ice storm that is sure to come (it's a warning, not a watch), I'm missing my first Ash Wednesday (I'm glad that's not a Holy Day of Obligation, though). I had also "missed" All Saints Day. I'm not doing a good job of being Catholic. The thing is, my missing Masses doesn't have to do with lack of interest. I'm having a sleeping issue that I don't feel like elaborating on. I don't have trouble falling asleep (I take Trazadone) but I have trouble getting consistent sleep and sleeping at the right times. I thought that since Mama passed, that would be some opportunity to no longer stay up all night and sleep in the day, but I have not improved on it. And it's taking a heavy toll on my Mass attendance. I know the optimal way to take care of that is to not sleep at all when I normally sleep and try to stay up all day until I finally get tired at the typical time that people are supposed to get tired and go to bed, but I'm worried that won't work either. That sounds like a brutal strategy but I've tried incrementally sleeping earlier and I keep falling back into the same dreaded routine.

Is it OK to call myself a Catholic even if I'm a bad Catholic? I'm not feeling much of a Catholic; I almost feel as if I have no right to attend Church anymore. It's weird.

It’s not how you start Lent but how you finish it. Lent is a time of spiritual growth. If you were already at ascetic perfection how would you grow in Lent?

You are a better Catholic than you know. Do not be harsh with yourself about any failings. Pick yourself up and give it a new shot. You don’t save yourself or perfect yourself. That is a work of God. It’s a grace thing. Yours will be a long slow path, rewarding in the end, but not a done deal anytime soon.