Alone again

[evangeline2020]

After 3 wonderful years together my partner has told me in the last week that he no longer loves me and doesn't want to be with me. I met him following a really horrible divorce, and I thought he was a "gift from God" and it was forever. My two girls (5&6) think he is their whole life, as did I. There is no reason for the separation, other than he doesn't love me any more and that he wants to be single again. He says its nothing I have said or done, and that there was nothing I could do to change it and that there isn't anyone else.
I'm feeling very alone, and lost. God seems very far away at the moment, and I'm finding it hard to cope with life. The only thing that keeps me going is my children, but having to watch him tell the girls that he doesn't love me, but that he still loves them and wants to be there for them, was just about the hardest thing I have had to bear.
Part of me wonders what I have done to deserve this, but I know realistically that its not about that. He gave me the strength to grow as a person, to become more ME, he encouraged me to do so, but in the process my personality became stronger and became something he doesn't want.
its so hard to process.
If you could pray for me at the moment it would really help. I've got practical things to do, like find accomodation and sort out benefits from the dss etc and its all really scary and I don't know how to do all of it.
thanks

 

[ukok]

After 3 wonderful years together my partner has told me in the last week that he no longer loves me and doesn't want to be with me. I met him following a really horrible divorce, and I thought he was a "gift from God" and it was forever. My two girls (5&6) think he is their whole life, as did I. There is no reason for the separation, other than he doesn't love me any more and that he wants to be single again. He says its nothing I have said or done, and that there was nothing I could do to change it and that there isn't anyone else.
I'm feeling very alone, and lost. God seems very far away at the moment, and I'm finding it hard to cope with life. The only thing that keeps me going is my children, but having to watch him tell the girls that he doesn't love me, but that he still loves them and wants to be there for them, was just about the hardest thing I have had to bear.
Part of me wonders what I have done to deserve this, but I know realistically that its not about that. He gave me the strength to grow as a person, to become more ME, he encouraged me to do so, but in the process my personality became stronger and became something he doesn't want.
its so hard to process.
If you could pray for me at the moment it would really help. I've got practical things to do, like find accomodation and sort out benefits from the dss etc and its all really scary and I don't know how to do all of it.
thanks

I would be more than happy to pray for you.

I feel so heartfelt sorry for you. I know what it is like to lose someone that you love very much, and that's why i know that what you are feeling is perfectly normal. It is a double blow, when a second relationship fails. Have faith. God Can hear you. No matter how far away He seems to be, He is really just right there by your side. Continue to reach out to Him in this time of terrible confusion and heartache. Hold on to your children. Get up, get out of bed and meet their needs daily, they will give you the motivation that you need to work your way through these initial dark days.

Feel free to talk privately through pm if you like.

 

[cyberwing]

Precious lamb,
Trust in Him. Jesus is weeping with you. He feels your deep pain and confusion. He knows what is was to be betrayed by one He had invested His love in. Jesus also knows the way out! He has gone before you and charted a way through the murky darkness that threatens you. Keep your eyes on Him. Sing to Him, tell Him how much you hurt and how much you NEED Him. He is a loving bridegroom who is very anxious to hear us tell Him how much we love Him and need Him!
I have personally been through something similar. He guided me through it. I won't say it's been easy but its much better than taking the road without Him! If you need to relate one on one, feel free to PM me.
Remember He keeps each and every tear we shed. There is an ancient Hebrew temple that has jars all around the outside. These jars are the tear jars. Hebrew women were not to cry in public so they had tear jars they kept in the house for when they wept. It is said this is the jar the woman poured over Jesus feet to wipe them clean with her hair. She poured her tears, all of her sorrows, hurts and grief were poured onto Jesus feet! What a beautiful portrait of what He does for us. HE loves you precious one, so much! He has plans for you!
I weep with you, for I know the deep injury and hurt this has wrought. I shall be praying for you.
~DJ

 

[Cat59]

I'll be keeping you in my prayers

 

[Firm Believer]

The clouds may look black today but believe me, the Lord will blow them away and the sun WILL shine for you again.

God bless

 

[Stanfi]

I am sorry for your loss. Deciding to trust someone, and have everything fall apart can be devasting and overwhelming. At the moment I am sure that it doesn't seem like life can go on, but trust me, it can and it will. I know it feels like God is so far away right now. It feels like he doesn't care about your pain, but he does.

I am reading a book titled "What becomes of the Broken Hearted" it's written by Michelle McKinney Hammond. It's a great book that outlines the healing of a broken heart with Lords help.

If I may give a couple of suggestions, here is what has helped me. First get down on your knees and cry out to God. Absouletly be 100% honest with him, tell him who you are angry at, who has hurt you, and ask him to help you overcome this.

Second forgive the one who has hurt you. I know is very hard, and it will take the help of the Lord. However this step is going to be very healing for you.

Another step is to get up and move on with life. Go out and do things that you enjoy, and avoid things that bring you pain about your lost realtionship. This in a way is a form of fasting. You have to discipline yourself, not to put yourself in a situation that will infllict more hurt upon you heart.

I know this is hard, and I've been there. However if you trust God, and always remember that his the only one that truly loves us, and will never let us down. He will heal your broken heart.

Here is a verse that is a promise for us
Luke 4:18 The Spirit of the Lord [is] upon me, because he hath anointed me to preach the gospel to the poor; he hath sent me to heal the brokenhearted, to preach deliverance to the captives, and recovering of sight to the blind, to set at liberty them that are bruised, eliverance to tof sight to the blind, to set at liberty them that are bruised,

I will pray for you

 

[Galadriel]

Hey there,
I am terribly sorry about what happened to you. I can't relate very good yet but I am sure that someday I will be able to. I agree that now is the time to stick close to God, cause he really does understand.

 

[desi]

Look evangeline2020, you have to look out for your daughters. So get over whatever you sadness you feel for yourself. Your responsibility here is to make sure your daughters turn out to be Godly women despite the fact you and daddy couldn't get along, and for that to happen they need a positive male role model. Not some "partner" who sleeps with mommy and tells them he loves them as he abandons them and you. Love is not a choice made out of convenience, it is a commitment. Maybe God is telling you something?

 

[evangeline2020]

Thank you all for you hearfelt words of encouragement, support and sympathy. Thank you mostly for the prayers I know you are saying for me, they really do mean a lot and I'm allready feeling the benefit of them.
In a way I think Desi is right and perhaps God was/is trying to tell me something, hard as that is to take on board at the moment. I am feeling better about myself, and as you say, I have to be strong for my girls and I'm not going to leave them too.
I've been remembering the "footprints" verse and that God is there carrying me now through this.
I've started to get on with my life, including doing some writing which I always seemed not to have time for. But it is just going to be step by step, day by day. I would really be grateful if you could keep me in your prayers of the next few days as I know there is still much to face. But at least I know I'm not facing it alone. God is there with me. Praise Him.

 

[Firm Believer]

Remember, the sun is shining, the birds are singing and God loves us all

 

[evangeline2020]

It is, they are and He does indeed, Hallelulia.

 

[evangeline2020]

Feeling stronger again today, God is closer to me and is helping me through this. I had the details through today of a faith and ministry course our diocese is running and I got the daytime slot I wanted and can go to the induction day as my girls are with their father that weekend.
I can really feel that God is looking after me with this course and that it is something I should be doing. All I need to do now is work out the financing of it... but I will remember to trust in the Lord always and he will provide.

 

[JillLars]

I'm glad you are feeling a little better evangeline! Hang in there, God won't let you down! I'll keep you in my prayers!

 

[evangeline2020]

Thank you all for all of your prayers.
I made it to church yesterday, and it was good. We sat "Together" although with about 6 feet of pew between us, but that was ok. We shook hands at the peace and I felt peace towards him.
He even bought me coffee after the service which was nice.
The good thing is that I feel that I've started to move on emotionally. I just need to have some strength to move on in a Godly maner as in the past when something like this has happened I've gone completely off the rails and been very unchristian in my behaviour.
But today I know that God loves me and that is enough for now.

 

[weblord]

May the God of peace comfort you under the shadow of his wings and may He keep you as the apple of His eyes and protect you with His shield of love. God loves us so much!!

 

[Firm Believer]

I have been praying for you

Have you managed to pull yet?

 

[evangeline2020]

Thank you Firm Believer for your prayers, they are much appreciated. I'm still working on the pulling, but in my heart I'm not sure if I'm ready for it really.
I've joined a couple of Christian Dating/Friendship agencies, but nothing has come of it yet. I've had a couple of secular replies but I'm not sure if its the right thing to be doing at the moment.
In the meantime I'll just keep on being with God and trying to live as he would have me do.But thanks for asking.

 

[kiwiky]

hi evangeline..Its not easy to go through what u have been through..Ive just been going through a break up too. was with my man of 2yrs and half long distance which was hard. But im learning to pick myself up again.Sometimes greif doesn't seem to leave. But at least we have a God to trust..Love always kylee

 

[Matt112]

Don't worry, Evangeline,

God sometimes causes things to happen which are painful to us and hard for us to understand. Yet he does this becuase he loves you and knows what's best for you. Keep your trust in God and he will comfort you.

I will be praying for you

 

[littlebritches71435]

my prayers are with you always.