- Aug 3, 2004
- 14,082
- 1,003
- 84
- Gender
- Male
- Faith
- Christian
- Marital Status
- Widowed
Probably her beautiful body - unless she is wearing a sack. Maybe we had better start locking beautiful women away.
John
NZ
John
NZ
Upvote
0
-
Starting today August 7th, 2024, in order to post in the Married Couples, Courting Couples, or Singles forums, you will not be allowed to post if you have your Marital status designated as private. Announcements will be made in the respective forums as well but please note that if yours is currently listed as Private, you will need to submit a ticket in the Support Area to have yours changed.
-
CF has always been a site that welcomes people from different backgrounds and beliefs to participate in discussion and even debate. That is the nature of its ministry. In view of recent events emotions are running very high. We need to remind people of some basic principles in debating on this site. We need to be civil when we express differences in opinion. No personal attacks. Avoid you, your statements. Don't characterize an entire political party with comparisons to Fascism or Communism or other extreme movements that committed atrocities. CF is not the place for broad brush or blanket statements about groups and political parties. Put the broad brushes and blankets away when you come to CF, better yet, put them in the incinerator. Debate had no place for them. We need to remember that people that commit acts of violence represent themselves or a small extreme faction.
All Men Look?
- Thread starter favoredbyGod
- Start date
MilitantSheep
Regular Member
Looking is fine, I don't mind if my boyfriend looks at a pretty girl in the street or wherever, it's me he loves.
Upvote
0
It could simply mean he has a strong attachment to his high school experience; a lost love or some such. I know that I still pine away when I see someone that looks a lot like my first crush. Of course if he's doing it all the time it could be more than that but I thought I'd throw it out there.
Well keep in mind the male stereotypes aren't always true. A body may be the first thing we notice, but it's also the easiest thing to see from a distance. I can't count the number of times I've seen someone and thought "hey! she's pretty cute!" and then totally changed my mind once she gets close enough to see the perpetual scowl scrunched onto her face, or that she smokes (instant and 100% turn off). Also, unless you're talking about a model or something, it can take time to become familiar with someone face and learn to appreciate it. Time that we usually don't bother to spend on other women, which you should probably be glad of
Anyway, point is that while we do look, we can be more complicated then you give us credit for. Ask your guy about it yourself and figure out what kind of things he really likes.
Upvote
0
Godzila
See, I make all things New!
- Apr 2, 2008
- 741
- 39
- Country
- United States
- Gender
- Male
- Faith
- Christian
- Marital Status
- Single
I believe God hot wired it into all men. Not sure about women.
Yes, we may look. But it is within one's righteousness to not take a second glance.
I also believe it is what you do with those "images" and "thoughts" that you take in during the day from looking at women that is of concern.
Yes, we may look. But it is within one's righteousness to not take a second glance.
I also believe it is what you do with those "images" and "thoughts" that you take in during the day from looking at women that is of concern.
Upvote
0
Ceili
God's plan makes a beautiful arrangement
Mine seems to have his scanning method under control,they stare at him first and he pretends not to see them. Tv or magazines though are a different story as he'll comment and leave it at that. I try not to check other men out. I just notice them but that's it.
My ex was terrible about this,eeeek. It was horrible when I was pregnant. I about clobbered him.
My ex was terrible about this,eeeek. It was horrible when I was pregnant. I about clobbered him.
Upvote
0
Recovering Philosopher,
It may be dumb to you, but your opinion about what I think really doesn't matter in my relationship. If that is what I care about, then it's just what I care about. You may think it's dumb, but God said he would perfect the things that concerneth me. That is a concern of mine. It's just that plain and simple.
It is what it is and I will leave it like that.....
It may be dumb to you, but your opinion about what I think really doesn't matter in my relationship. If that is what I care about, then it's just what I care about. You may think it's dumb, but God said he would perfect the things that concerneth me. That is a concern of mine. It's just that plain and simple.
It is what it is and I will leave it like that.....
Upvote
0
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Genocides_in_history
The above link should quickly show you that God does not care about the wandering eyes of your boyfriend
Upvote
0
Not here to debate with u, my opinion and concerns are between the Lord and myself. When I say my prayers and discuss my concerns to the Lord, your not the one that answers them, nor are you the one that I pray to, bottom line.... Continue to say what u want, it's a wrap.
Upvote
0
Upvote
0
- Aug 3, 2004
- 14,082
- 1,003
- 84
- Gender
- Male
- Faith
- Christian
- Marital Status
- Widowed
Back on topic.
To assume a guy who notices an attractive woman is lusting is just horrible. To lust after a woman in the biblical sense means a deliberate intent given an opportunity. It is a considered, deliberate commitment to do something morally wrong. Are marriages that insecure that any guy who looks at an attractive women is assumed to be automatically thinking about bedding her, mentally at least? I don't think so.
John
NZ
Upvote
0
I really like your biblical interpretation, but I'd like to see a source. Can you back up the assertion that the word that is translated as lust actually refers to a deliberate intent? Because that would be fantastic.
Upvote
0
- Aug 3, 2004
- 14,082
- 1,003
- 84
- Gender
- Male
- Faith
- Christian
- Marital Status
- Widowed
It is contained within the Greek grammatical construction of that verse in Matthew.
My reference is Kingdom Ethics By Stassen & Gushee. They write "This single sentence is among the most damagingly misunderstood in the entire scriptural record. Much hinges on a proper translation of the key phrase pros to epithymesai. Most modem translations miss the critical dimension of intent that is implicit here. For example, the NRSV reads "everyone who looks at a woman with lust" compare the NIV - "anyone who looks at a woman lustfully." The KJV actually captures the nuance more adequately: "whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her." Donald Hagner has it just about right: "everyone who looks at a woman with the purpose of lusting after her" (Matthew 1-13, 119). Guelich translates the phrase "in order to desire having her (sexually)," emphasizing the aspect of possession of what belongs to another (Sermon on the Mount, 193-94).
This small matter of exegesis and translation is no small matter at all. The more common and less accurate translation has contributed greatly to an idealistic/unrealistic rendering of Jesus' teaching. If Jesus is saying that the first spark of attraction one has to another person is the equivalent of the act of adultery, then surely the average adult---especially the average male-has committed many such acts. If so, the teaching of Jesus is intended simply to shame us or to show us how far we are from the perfection he demands.
However, this is not the nature of Jesus' teaching. If we read his teaching instead as concrete direction concerning how to do God's will and thus enjoy kingdom existence here and now, then he must mean something like what the Greek text actually seems to say. Jesus is identifying an act of human will (or a pattern of human willfulness) which leads us in the direction of violating God's will and thus ensnaring ourselves in misery.
An accurate description of this process or pattern of behavior would begin with the acknowledgment that precisely because we are embodied sexual selves, sexual attraction is an inescapable dimension of human existence. We are drawn mysteriously to the physical beauty and form of others, certain others in particular. When we encounter people who for whatever reason of face, shape or form are particularly appealing to us, we frequently experience a momentary frisson of excitement, a spark of attraction. This appears to be part of the created order and should not be identified as sinful [FONT="](d. [/FONT]Allison, Sermon on the Mount, 73-74). (It should also be noted that we are sometimes drawn to the inner beauty of others; a different path that can have the same result.)
There is hope for the average male after all!
John
NZ
My reference is Kingdom Ethics By Stassen & Gushee. They write "This single sentence is among the most damagingly misunderstood in the entire scriptural record. Much hinges on a proper translation of the key phrase pros to epithymesai. Most modem translations miss the critical dimension of intent that is implicit here. For example, the NRSV reads "everyone who looks at a woman with lust" compare the NIV - "anyone who looks at a woman lustfully." The KJV actually captures the nuance more adequately: "whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her." Donald Hagner has it just about right: "everyone who looks at a woman with the purpose of lusting after her" (Matthew 1-13, 119). Guelich translates the phrase "in order to desire having her (sexually)," emphasizing the aspect of possession of what belongs to another (Sermon on the Mount, 193-94).
This small matter of exegesis and translation is no small matter at all. The more common and less accurate translation has contributed greatly to an idealistic/unrealistic rendering of Jesus' teaching. If Jesus is saying that the first spark of attraction one has to another person is the equivalent of the act of adultery, then surely the average adult---especially the average male-has committed many such acts. If so, the teaching of Jesus is intended simply to shame us or to show us how far we are from the perfection he demands.
However, this is not the nature of Jesus' teaching. If we read his teaching instead as concrete direction concerning how to do God's will and thus enjoy kingdom existence here and now, then he must mean something like what the Greek text actually seems to say. Jesus is identifying an act of human will (or a pattern of human willfulness) which leads us in the direction of violating God's will and thus ensnaring ourselves in misery.
An accurate description of this process or pattern of behavior would begin with the acknowledgment that precisely because we are embodied sexual selves, sexual attraction is an inescapable dimension of human existence. We are drawn mysteriously to the physical beauty and form of others, certain others in particular. When we encounter people who for whatever reason of face, shape or form are particularly appealing to us, we frequently experience a momentary frisson of excitement, a spark of attraction. This appears to be part of the created order and should not be identified as sinful [FONT="](d. [/FONT]Allison, Sermon on the Mount, 73-74). (It should also be noted that we are sometimes drawn to the inner beauty of others; a different path that can have the same result.)
There is hope for the average male after all!
John
NZ
Upvote
0
Bootstrap
Regular Member
It's hard not to look. Some men take extreme measures to avoid looking - have you noticed that there are Christian men who avoid looking a woman in the eye, and who look away when a woman comes toward them? To me, that's a bit unnatural and makes it hard to be human around women.
My parents have a three second rule. It's OK to look for three seconds. It's OK to notice. That's a bit arbitrary, but it works for me.
Here's why it makes sense to me: the real problem is not noticing a woman, but lusting after her, which means setting your heart on her, telling yourself you want her [1], fantasizing about her [2]. For me at least, that doesn't happen in three seconds. And three seconds is long enough to smile at her and make eye contact. Friendly is good.
And as a guy I just don't know how to not notice. I have to draw the line at what is possible.
Works for me, at any rate ;->
Jonathan
[1] The Greek meaning of lust (epithumeo)
[2] Sinful thoughts
My parents have a three second rule. It's OK to look for three seconds. It's OK to notice. That's a bit arbitrary, but it works for me.
Here's why it makes sense to me: the real problem is not noticing a woman, but lusting after her, which means setting your heart on her, telling yourself you want her [1], fantasizing about her [2]. For me at least, that doesn't happen in three seconds. And three seconds is long enough to smile at her and make eye contact. Friendly is good.
And as a guy I just don't know how to not notice. I have to draw the line at what is possible.
Works for me, at any rate ;->
Jonathan
[1] The Greek meaning of lust (epithumeo)
[2] Sinful thoughts
Upvote
0
Similar threads
