S
Sushi614
Guest
Has anyone married into a family of ministers/missionaries?
I married my husband almost 10 years ago now. His parents were transitioning from being missionaries in Columbia to pastors in Tx at the time. The Grand Parents have been pastors or in the ministry all of their lives. Their other kids (my husbands aunts and uncles) are also in the ministry. The oldest daughter and her husband are pastors. The youngest son and his wife are missionaries in Lithuania. His Dad is the middle son now pastoring in Houston.
His parents moved away from us to Houston when we got married to pastor their new church. So we've been pretty hands off this whole time. Of course we were involved in our own local church. But we have moved near them now. So it's full on all the time now helping with things.
Don't get me wrong, I love being an active part in our music ministry. Singing is what drives my passion to worship and be connected to God. But I've come across issues of resentment towards me and the whole family it seems. Since the worship leader is the pastor's wife and the keyboard player is their son and also my husband, we get the "all in the family" comments a lot. And I don't mean "How nice that they all work together as a family to support the ministry." It always seems to come out as negative. Like we're just ganging up together. Which is completely not the case.
It's particularly hard for me because although I was raised in church, we were not the ministers. And now I'm automatically in the "inner circle" and expected to be a certain way. I was not raised in that circle like the rest of the family. I don't like the feeling that people may think I'm treated with favoritism.
Also, I'm only a member of the team, not a leader. But as the "daughter" I am expected to help set everything up and do all this "extra stuff" because no one else will help do it. It's almost like it would be easier to actually have an official position.
So, not to be a downer. I just thought that people like us could use a little support. We can share thoughts and suggestions to hopefully work thru some of these kind of problems.
I guess I'm wondering if anyone else feels this way.
I married my husband almost 10 years ago now. His parents were transitioning from being missionaries in Columbia to pastors in Tx at the time. The Grand Parents have been pastors or in the ministry all of their lives. Their other kids (my husbands aunts and uncles) are also in the ministry. The oldest daughter and her husband are pastors. The youngest son and his wife are missionaries in Lithuania. His Dad is the middle son now pastoring in Houston.
His parents moved away from us to Houston when we got married to pastor their new church. So we've been pretty hands off this whole time. Of course we were involved in our own local church. But we have moved near them now. So it's full on all the time now helping with things.
Don't get me wrong, I love being an active part in our music ministry. Singing is what drives my passion to worship and be connected to God. But I've come across issues of resentment towards me and the whole family it seems. Since the worship leader is the pastor's wife and the keyboard player is their son and also my husband, we get the "all in the family" comments a lot. And I don't mean "How nice that they all work together as a family to support the ministry." It always seems to come out as negative. Like we're just ganging up together. Which is completely not the case.
It's particularly hard for me because although I was raised in church, we were not the ministers. And now I'm automatically in the "inner circle" and expected to be a certain way. I was not raised in that circle like the rest of the family. I don't like the feeling that people may think I'm treated with favoritism.
Also, I'm only a member of the team, not a leader. But as the "daughter" I am expected to help set everything up and do all this "extra stuff" because no one else will help do it. It's almost like it would be easier to actually have an official position.
So, not to be a downer. I just thought that people like us could use a little support. We can share thoughts and suggestions to hopefully work thru some of these kind of problems.
I guess I'm wondering if anyone else feels this way.