A perspective on OCD

[ObsessedButBlessed]

Someone posted on another OCD forum that living with OCD is like playing "Wheel of Fortune" with your emotions. Each day, you never know where the wheel is going to land. It might be a "good" day, where OCD is leaving you alone for the most part, or it might be a "bad" day where OCD is bugging the heck out of you. I thought it was such a clever (and accurate) way of describing the emotional ups and downs we experience with OCD.

This is also what I think makes OCD so darn hard to deal with. The theory behind traditional Cognitive Behavioral Therapy is that our thoughts create our feelings. Therefore if I constantly have depressing thoughts I'm going to feel depressed. But if I change my attitude and try to think positively, I'm going to end up feeling better.

With OCD, I do think there is definitely some truth to the theory behind CBT. I think we have all experienced that "emotion checking", where we "check" our feelings to see if are thoughts our supported. And 9 times out of 10 (or 10 times out of 10, in my case! ) it always does. We have these awful repetitive thoughts, and we feel anxious/guilty/depressed because of them.

But then there are those days where you feel anxious/depressed for no reason. It's the "Wheel of Fortune" acting up, where you wake up feeling anxious, but can't figure out why. Or sometimes that anxiety comes up out of nowhere, and of course, we end up just attaching it to our obsession.

I have found that just taking on the attitude of "forget it, I'm going to keep on living anyway" helps with those times that the emotional Wheel of Fortune is in play. Sometimes it's incredibly hard, and painful, because that anxious knot in the pit of my stomach is just begging me to give in and start obsessing about whatever the flavor of the day is. I tell myself I can handle this, and even dare the anxiety to crank it up a notch.

Anyone have any useful tools and tips for dealing with those anxious moments? Thoughts?

 

[RachelZ]

Really good post...thanks Sad. Don't know if this is a good idea or not but in my recent post I said I was dealing with it by saying "That's OCD thinking" cos I find it easier to acknoweldge that as reality as opposed to "that thought was OCD". Might only seem a subtle difference but it seems to make a lot of difference to me. As has prolly been said before it's not the thought but the way we react - think and respond - that is the problem. Don't know if thats helpful or not. Thanks again, Rachel

 

[SkyCloud]

Well, in my experience, the "Wheel of Fortune" also works in the "I'm not going to listen to that OCD thought" area also. Therefore, sometimes I ignored the OCD thought, other times I couldn't. I wish it weren't like that.

 

[TheDeepblue]

Wow. This definitely describes me, especially in dealing with bad thoughts and in social situations. I have to constantly tell myself that everything will be ok and that I will not end up saying anything stupid or embarass myself. And sometimes I try to avoid social interaction because I think I will have nothing to say or feel pressured to say something. Thought wise I am ignoring bad thoughts I am having today. What else can I do? I say this now, but I bet that later down the road I will be feeling extremely anxious over the thoughts I have.

 

[fernando123]

Hey ppl i suffer frm OCD and i past this yahoo ask website


this part helped me and it was from Annie Oakley

'''The commentary in my Bible says the following:
"In Matthew 12:31, 32 The Pharisees had blasphemed against the Spirit by attributing the power by which Christ did miracles to satan (12:24) instead of the Holy Spirit. The unpardonable sin is the deliberate refusal to acknowledge God's power in Christ. It indicates a deliberate and irreversible hardness of heart. Sometimes believers worry that they have accidentally committed this unforgivable sin. But only those who have turned their backs on God and rejected all faith have any need to worry. Jesus said they can't be forgiven - not because their sin is worse than any other, but because they will never ask for forgiveness. Whoever rejects the prompting of the Holy Spirit removes himself or herself from the only force that can lead him or her to repentance and restoration to God."

GOD BLESS

 

[RascoeBB]

Hey Sad, I've had low days, i've had high days. Everyday I think of my OCD. I just pray to God in the morning and tell Him how I feel. From there on I just push through it. When i start to feel down or sad, I just say a quick prayer and move on. Jesus wants to give us peace and comfort. Even when your troubled He still wants us to sing.

Do not worry about anything, but pray and ask God for everything you need, always giving thanks. And God's peace, which is so great we cannot understand it, will keep your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.
Philipians 4:6-7

 

[SkyCloud]

Amen, RascoeBB.

 

[gracealone]

quote Sad
But then there are those days where you feel anxious/depressed for no reason. It's the "Wheel of Fortune" acting up, where you wake up feeling anxious, but can't figure out why. Or sometimes that anxiety comes up out of nowhere, and of course, we end up just attaching it to our obsession.

Hi Sad,
Really great post! I especially like the observation you made in the quote above. I call this free floating anxiety. In my own experience this is what drives my OCD machine. The free floating anxiety is there already - which can be represented by a strip of dangling fly paper. Then the fly, which is represented by the unwanted/intrusive thought buzzes to close to it and wham, the thought/fly is grabbed by the flypaper and gets stuck there.
It's important when this happens to me that I talk to myself by saying something like. This thought is bothering me only because my fight or flight alarm is broken and wants something to chew on. It's OK that I'm feeling anxiety right now, this feeling doesn't define what is really true. I'm just going to let that thought be there and do my level best to refocus my attention on something real and productive.
Love your practical insight.
God Bless,
Mitzi

 

[fernando123]

Amen frm me 2, RascoeBB !!!

GOD BLESS

 

[RachelZ]

What a brilliant analogy Gracealone...thank you so much! Really works in with something I said in another thread about feeling like there's a fly buzzing around...as in the OCD thought. The free floating anxiety and fly paper idea really completes this description of what can go on...certainly for me.

Thanks again...hope you're well and settled into your new home and all went well with the new arrival. Take care, Rachel

 

[ObsessedButBlessed]

Hello everyone!

Thanks for all the great comments. I completely agree with all of them. SkyCloud I totally agree that the Wheel of Fortune also applies to our ability to ignore, or let the thoughts be there on any given day. Just as our feelings are random and unpredictable, so are our thoughts. I don't know about you, but some days it is almost like there is a physical pull in my brain to start ruminating and obsessing. It feels like I am teetering on the edge of a full-blown OCD episode, and though I want to give in (to find relief and make the thoughts go away), I can't.

Rascoe, I also think about my OCD every day. I was just thinking that - even when my OCD went into spontaneous remission for six months last year - there wasn't a day that went by that I didn't at least think about it. The difference was, they were just thoughts like any other thought I had - like, do I want pizza or burgers for dinner?

I look forward to the day that these thoughts are insignificant.

 

[SkyCloud]

I can relate to things you said, Sad. Well everybody, we just got to hang in there and keep wating on and trusting in God. (P.S. I've noticed that just the way the OCD comes just like that, at times the OCD also goes just like that, then we have peace. Just like that remission thing you mentioned, Sad.)

 

[ObsessedButBlessed]

I can relate to things you said, Sad. Well everybody, we just got to hang in there and keep wating on and trusting in God. (P.S. I've noticed that just the way the OCD comes just like that, at times the OCD also goes just like that, then we have peace. Just like that remission thing you mentioned, Sad.)

Yeah I wish it would happen again! When it came back after six months I realized I may actually have to do some work on my own to get out of this... lol.

 

[SkyCloud]

Um-hum.