A person who divorces and remarries

[tqpix]

I thought I read somewhere in the Bible that if a man divorces a woman, and the woman remarries, the man cannot reconcile with the woman.

Is there somewhere in the Bible that actually says this. If there is, I'd like to know where please, because I tried looking but can't find it.

 

[St. Worm2]

I thought I read somewhere in the Bible that if a man divorces a woman, and the woman remarries, the man cannot reconcile with the woman.

Is there somewhere in the Bible that actually says this. If there is, I'd like to know where please, because I tried looking but can't find it.

Hi Tqpix, the Bible doesn't say exactly what you are asking about above, but the principle is certainly there. If a man divorces his wife and she remarries, he cannot reconcile with her because she's, well, married (unless you think the Lord allows women to have multiple husbands at the same time .. ). The Bible says you're not supposed to covet your neighbor's wife (Exodus 20:17b), even if you were married to her at one time.

Hope that helps!

--David

 

[daveleau]

It says that she is committing adultery, but it does not say that you can not reconcile.

1Co 7:10 To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife must not separate from her husband.
1Co 7:11 But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband must not divorce his wife.
1Co 7:12 To the rest I say this (I, not the Lord): If any brother has a wife who is not a believer and she is willing to live with him, he must not divorce her.
1Co 7:13 And if a woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to live with her, she must not divorce him.
1Co 7:14 For the unbelieving husband has been sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife has been sanctified through her believing husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy.
1Co 7:15 But if the unbeliever leaves, let him do so. A believing man or woman is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace.
1Co 7:16 How do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or, how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife?
1Co 7:17 Nevertheless, each one should retain the place in life that the Lord assigned to him and to which God has called him. This is the rule I lay down in all the churches.
(NIV)

Luk 16:18 "Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery, and the man who marries a divorced woman commits adultery. (NIV)

Mat 19:9 I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, and marries another woman commits adultery." (NIV)

Mat 5:32 But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, causes her to become an adulteress, and anyone who marries the divorced woman commits adultery. (NIV)

 

[Kaitsu]

Hi TQPIX

I thought I read somewhere in the Bible that if a man divorces a woman, and the woman remarries, the man cannot reconcile with the woman.

Is there somewhere in the Bible that actually says this. If there is, I'd like to know where please, because I tried looking but can't find it.

I do not think the bible says this anywhere. The bible does say that divorce is acceptable only on the grounds of adultery, but does not deny reconciliation - afterall, forgiveness and reconciliation are a big part of our faith.

But what better example than God's own:

"I gave faithless Israel her certificate of divorce and sent her away because of all her adulteries. Yet I saw that her unfaithful sister Judah had no fear; she also went out and committed adultery." Jer 3:8

and later:

""The time is coming," declares the LORD , "when I will make a new covenant with the house of Israel and with the house of Judah." Jer 31:31

However, if a former partner has already remarried then that surely prevents any reconciliation whilst that marriage still exists. This is where the matter gets complex. The bible does not provide us with a heap of case-studies to go through and find a precedent to work with, so we have to work with the original principles and apply them according to what our prayer and consciences tell us.

In my opinion, divorce is not simply when the legal papers are finalised, divorce takes place when we no longer love and care for our partners. In the same way, marriage is not just a church or civil ceremony, but a marriage of hearts before God.

The situation you describe includes (at least) three people and needs a lot of careful thought and prayer to find the solution that is right in God's eyes.

Kaitsu

 

[johnd]

Deuteronomy 24:1 When a man hath taken a wife, and married her, and it come to pass that she find no favour in his eyes, because he hath found some uncleanness in her: then let him write her a bill of divorcement, and give it in her hand, and send her out of his house. 2 And when she is departed out of his house, she may go and be another man’s wife. 3 And if the latter husband hate her, and write her a bill of divorcement, and giveth it in her hand, and sendeth her out of his house; or if the latter husband die, which took her to be his wife; 4 Her former husband, which sent her away, may not take her again to be his wife, after that she is defiled; for that is abomination before the LORD: and thou shalt not cause the land to sin, which the LORD thy God giveth thee for an inheritance.

 

[Kaitsu]

Hi johnd

Thanks very much for that reference. It is a very interesting situation, and it is worthy of some thought.

It seems to me this is part of the divorce commentary in the OT that Jesus refers to concerning Moses attempts to control marital indifference.

"Jesus replied, “Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning." Matt 19:8

I looked up some comments and read that one particular reason for this rule was to prevent what was the equivalent of modern-day "wife-swapping" wherein wives were freed through a technical divorce, traded, and then taken back again. No wonder it was called an abomination in God's eyes!

Another reason given was to make men think twice before flippantly giving one wife "the boot" in order to try another that was perhaps more "promising", and maybe even shopping around for more, and then finally settling with the one that got the most "points".

In which case, I do not think there is any underlying intrinsic prohibition of remarrying a former wife, rather, the emphasis is on the purpose behind the event. If, for example, the remarriage were to be the outcome of repentence and forgiveness learnt the hard way through rough experience, would God see this as an abomination? or as a triumph of good over bad?

But, whatever the reason, you are perfectly correct, the passage does exist - thanks for that (proof what a great site this is)

Kaitsu

 

[dellla]

http://www.ccel.org/h/henry/mhc2/MHC46007.HTM

Hopefully this link may be of use to you, has been of great use to myself

 

[tqpix]

Actually the verse you seek does exist

Deuteronomy 24:1 When a man hath taken a wife, and married her, and it come to pass that she find no favour in his eyes, because he hath found some uncleanness in her: then let him write her a bill of divorcement, and give it in her hand, and send her out of his house. 2 And when she is departed out of his house, she may go and be another man’s wife. 3 And if the latter husband hate her, and write her a bill of divorcement, and giveth it in her hand, and sendeth her out of his house; or if the latter husband die, which took her to be his wife; 4 Her former husband, which sent her away, may not take her again to be his wife, after that she is defiled; for that is abomination before the LORD: and thou shalt not cause the land to sin, which the LORD thy God giveth thee for an inheritance.

Thank you. I was sure I read the passage somewhere, but I couldn't find it when I searched for it. Thank you very much.

http://www.ccel.org/h/henry/mhc2/MHC46007.HTM

Hopefully this link may be of use to you, has been of great use to myself

Thank you for that link.