I can't do this

[Lady Bug]

This may look like "school" but I can't help it.

There are some adult faith formation opportunities at the parish closest to me. I'm interested in one or two of them but I'm getting very nervous at the thought of them. It's the same kind of "stage fright" nerves that I had in school. It's a very large parish (population-wise) and I feel that going to these things is doomed because (1) It will probably be compromised of parishioners and not outsiders and (2) It will probably be compromised of parishioners already in their cliques and I will find it intimidating to try to sit somewhere. You would think that I grew out of this stuff after seventh grade - no I didn't.

There is another faith formation opportunity at the parish I was confirmed at and there is a chance I may know a few more faces there, in spite of the cliques. However, the first parish is right around the corner, and I think that place may ultimately be a better fit for me, but I only know the person who is heading the event.

The reason why these matters carry such weight for me is that the church family may be the only family I'll ever have. I want to choose wisely but I can't know if I'm choosing wisely unless I try it out.

 

[Michie]

You will just have to choose. Do you want to get to know people better at what parish? That’s basically the question you have to ask yourself. And don’t worry. Everyone is out of that adolescent type school thing at this point I’m sure. Just give it time. Be open and friendly, etc.

 

[Lady Bug]

You will just have to choose. Do you want to get to know people better at what parish? That’s basically the question you have to ask yourself. And don’t worry. Everyone is out of that adolescent type school thing at this point I’m sure. Just give it time. Be open and friendly, etc.

I'm not a member of either parish, lol. I actually have a soft spot for the parish I'm a member of and am probably better off just doing things there but ever since I had to start taking care of my dad more and then after he died, I haven't been there as much for some reason. They have a nice thing that meets every Wednesday but their faith formation stuff is not as expansive.

I'm struggling with liking someone from one of the other parishes and I can't decide if I'm better off not going to its faith formation if the person is going to be there. I don't want to start a long-winded conversation about this but I'm trying to decide if seeing him or not seeing him will be better for my well-being.

 

[Lady Bug]

ps I don't mean to be all over the place about this.

Parish 1: I was confirmed at one parish but I never felt it to be a welcoming-enough parish.

Parish 2: I live very close (5 minutes) to one parish and it looks like a great parish but I'm afraid that I won't make friends.

Parish 3: I'm a member of this parish (distance-wise, it's in between the two parishes mentioned above) but haven't been to their Wednesday gatherings in months and months, maybe over a year (the reason is given in the previous comment). But their Wednesday meetings conflict with the Wednesday Daily Mass at Parish 2. And that's the parish where I like this guy who is an altar server at that Mass but I don't know if he likes me. Once again, I'm afraid this will devolve into a long-winded conversation. Sometimes I think I'm better off staying away from Parish 2.

 

[Michie]

I’d do #2 and make it work. Sounds like the best option from an outsider’s pov. Sometimes we just need to choose and make it our home. There are always the others to fall back on if things do not work out. But be patient with your choice. It’s a two way street in many instances. It may not be overnight but you grow into it.

Of course, you’ll have to deal with the crush you have but pray for God’s discernment and strength. You are very blessed to have so many options!