A new Christian and really struggling with life

[PinkyRock]

2 weeks ago as of tomorrow I became a Christian. On Saturday this week I broke friends with my best friend of 9 years because of things she has done: gotten drunk underage (I have a big thing about following the law and she's never done anything like that before), talking about my friends behind their backs, calling our group of friends 'neeks' and then lastly, using me and my group of friends as a backup option when the popular group stopped pretending to like her. On Saturday I properly thought about it and decided to make the decision to break friends. She kept begging me to stay friends with her afterwards until I eventually got fed up and blocked her as she wouldn't take no for an answer. This is not an average friend squabble that will be over by tomorrow. Well today I had school and basically my 2nd best friend told me that I should stay friends with my ex-best-friend and kept saying that all the time and I was just fed up. Then I had maths with the the ebf (ex best friend, but shortened) and I have to sit next to them bc of seating plan and they were talking to the person next to them about me and were saying things like 'why cant she just be friends with me' and I just got too upset and stressed and used my exit card within 5 minutes of the lesson and spent all but 10 minutes of the rest of the lesson walking around just thinking about the situation. At break I just sat by myself reading a book. I had a camhs appointment today as well and they decided to increase my antidepressants for anxiety (aka setraline/zoloft) to 2 tablets instead of 1 and I was just fed up and annoyed by that. Now I am just listening to sad and depressing songs feeling depressed and being fed up with living and wanting to self harm (I have a history of self harm and have been also referred to camhs 3 times because of that). I am just fed up now and had to put it somewhere :/ :'(

 

[FutureAndAHope]

It is great to hear you have become a Christian. The bible says "all thing work together for good for those who love God" ... no matter how you feel right now, I am sure things will work out fine. You have a lot of life ahead of you. Don't feel trapped by the present moment in time. Just as a small word of encouragement and advise, God prefers us to build good long lasting relationships. He likes us to forgive others, and be kind to them. If your friends want to be around you, try to rebuild those friendships. Ask God to build with in you a kind, strong, and faithful heart. I am sure you have these qualities, but we all need more grace.

 

[Johnnz]

Teenage relationships are oftem quite unpreciatble and fraught. Can you consdier not cutting her off but not getting drawn in to her less than ideal behaviours? She is a person with real needs quite obviously. Maybe you can bring something of Jesus to her.

John
NZ

 

[1watchman]

Did you "become a Christian" in ideology and decision, or in faith in the Lord Jesus Christ as Savior and Lord of your life? Following His teachings is not salvation, so I hope your confession is a new birth in the Lord Jesus, the Christ of God. Look up always!