a conflict of thinking

[Christownsme]

I'm not sure what's going on, but I don't talk as much as I used to. It's like I'm a mute most of the time. For one thing, I can't think of anything to say. Second, with most of what I might say, it's wiser to keep my mouth shut than be a fool and speak.

I'm not interested in a lot of things lately. I think I'm going thru a depression. I've even lost interest in going to church and reading the Bible. My prayer life has spurts, but it isn't that hot either.

I realize I can't fix myself by "do this better!" and "do this more!" etc... These comments usually come from other church goers and forum members. But God is doing a work in me I trust will help me in the long run. But for now, it seems like my desire is less than excellent. Maybe I'm coming to grips with who I really am. A depraved sinner in need of a Savior. I've tried so hard to be a Christian, and did all the right things and all the right words. But I have grown tired and I find I haven't changed much deep inside.

The good news is that I know the truth about Jesus Christ, and I have a small amount of faith that He will finish what He started in me. I know I need Him, His forgiveness and love. I really need to be able to believe in Jesus, in His gospel. I believe, I do though have unbelief which is incredibly visible to me now, and I'm confessing it and I know where I stand. I'm a nothing. But in Christ's eyes we are precious. It's a conflict of thinking.

 

[renewed21]

In what manner has God determined to use you to further His glory?

 

[Christownsme]

In what manner has God determined to use you to further His glory?

I'm talented in music, and I create music to bring glory to God. But I wouldn't know the exact path - God has it planned out.

 

[TheCHammer]

I don't think you are alone in this. I think this could be said of many Christians. Some times we find ourselves second guessing what is to be for us, but if a stay focused, we will eventually figure things out through him.
Remember, Romans 3:23 states: For everyone has sinned; we all fall short of God’s glorious standard.

 

[renewed21]

Are there any venues in which you can use your talent to grow closer to God? (i.e. choir, church pianist, playing for older folks at a rest home, getting together with other musicians and playing worship music in an informal manner or formal manner)