11 Weeks Pregnant & Not Happy

[HisW0rd]

So far the father has left me alone. He tried to get me to come over to his home one day and I just couldn’t find the peace to do it. The worst part about it is I TRIED to make it work. Even though this man hurt me, I still loved him and cared for him. After he stole my money and stole from my father, I still tried to walk in love but I wont lie, he always finds a way to make me . He would say the most rudest and ignorant things when I say no to him (when he realizes I don’t want to be with him at all)....
Being pregnant forces you to look at yourself in the mirror and say hmm? I'm just as broken and I’m destroying this baby and myself by not doing the right things. I just know I am heartbroken but I don’t want my child to suffer for the decisions I made. So I need deliverance from smoking and I pray that the Lord will protect him/her from my foolishness. I stopped and I want to be happy about this baby, but I cry more than anything...
I don’t know how to get past the fact that I didn’t even want to be with him and out of all the men I WANTED TO BE with, I couldn’t conceive if I drew it on paper.
It just hurts and everyone say quit thinking about yourself...well this baby is me...he/she is living in me now and will part from me but its still ME. Whatever I do will make or break this child...I cant keep living the same life I was before. I have realized that not only have I hurt myself but God. I am flawed and I don’t know where to go to find peace.
I ended up quitting my job. The job that pays almost twice as much I get for being a teacher and you know what..I don’t care about the money. I don’t care about having nice things...I just want my baby and I to be healthy and wholesome children of God. I just want God and I need to find a place of peace to work at.
I wanted to be in love with the man I had my child by. I want to be able to call him and tell him how I feel our little 11 week fetus flutters. Of stead I am alone and I choose to be alone. If I wanted, Devin (the father) would be right here.
It scares me because all the things that I wanted to do before I get pregnant is long gone now, I wanted to make sure I am in right standing with God. I know I can still do that but it just baffles me that God has given me this child in the worst times imaginable. I'm going to have to teach him/her to be strong from an early age. This baby is soooo anointed its a blessing that God thought I would be good enough to have this baby.
I feel better and its comforting to see the weeks go by without no bad news. Its just still new to me, im scared that my bad habits may of hurt the baby, but I pray that the Lord protects him/her.
I appreciate everyone who has read my posts concerning this. Out of all of this the main thing I want is for Devin soul to be saved and at peace...

 

[miss.enigma]

So far the father has left me alone. He tried to get me to come over to his home one day and I just couldn’t find the peace to do it. The worst part about it is I TRIED to make it work. Even though this man hurt me, I still loved him and cared for him. After he stole my money and stole from my father, I still tried to walk in love but I wont lie, he always finds a way to make me

. He would say the most rudest and ignorant things when I say no to him (when he realizes I don’t want to be with him at all)....
Being pregnant forces you to look at yourself in the mirror and say hmm? I'm just as broken and I’m destroying this baby and myself by not doing the right things. I just know I am heartbroken but I don’t want my child to suffer for the decisions I made. So I need deliverance from smoking and I pray that the Lord will protect him/her from my foolishness. I stopped and I want to be happy about this baby, but I cry more than anything...
I don’t know how to get past the fact that I didn’t even want to be with him and out of all the men I WANTED TO BE with, I couldn’t conceive if I drew it on paper.
It just hurts and everyone say quit thinking about yourself...well this baby is me...he/she is living in me now and will part from me but its still ME. Whatever I do will make or break this child...I cant keep living the same life I was before. I have realized that not only have I hurt myself but God. I am flawed and I don’t know where to go to find peace.
I ended up quitting my job. The job that pays almost twice as much I get for being a teacher and you know what..I don’t care about the money. I don’t care about having nice things...I just want my baby and I to be healthy and wholesome children of God. I just want God and I need to find a place of peace to work at.
I wanted to be in love with the man I had my child by. I want to be able to call him and tell him how I feel our little 11 week fetus flutters. Of stead I am alone and I choose to be alone. If I wanted, Devin (the father) would be right here.
It scares me because all the things that I wanted to do before I get pregnant is long gone now, I wanted to make sure I am in right standing with God. I know I can still do that but it just baffles me that God has given me this child in the worst times imaginable. I'm going to have to teach him/her to be strong from an early age. This baby is soooo anointed its a blessing that God thought I would be good enough to have this baby.
I feel better and its comforting to see the weeks go by without no bad news. Its just still new to me, im scared that my bad habits may of hurt the baby, but I pray that the Lord protects him/her.
I appreciate everyone who has read my posts concerning this. Out of all of this the main thing I want is for Devin soul to be saved and at peace...
　

Oooohhh, God bless both of you... you and the child God has given you. I will keep you in my prayers, and ask my patronsaint, Mary-Magdalene and St. Michael the Archangel, to keep you safe and protect you both from evil. I will also pray for Devins conversion... And I will ask The holy Virgin Mary to keep you company and guide you, in this time of blessing and trial for you.

 

[Stephanie7]

PRAYING

 

[Linus]

You and your baby are constantly in my prayers!

 

[servant of Merciful Love]

Continuing in prayer for your strength, hope, and peace

 

[annrobert]

I pray that Jesus keep you and your baby safe and that He comfort you and lead you and guide you and give you peace and joy.I pray for your protection and that Jesus always be with you and your baby.I pray in Jesus Name amen

 

[K9_Trainer]

Definitely praying for you, the man that has wronged you (and the Lord!) and your unborn child. I'm praying that you will find comfort in the Lord....He is with you at all times, don't be afraid to lean on Him and give Him your problems. Just stay strong in Him, He will take care of you

 

[andreha]

HisW0rd, my dear sister.

I prayed for you, and I know the Lord will make a way. He never deserts His children. You know, we don't always understand why things happen the way we do. I grew up in a dysfunctional family. As a child, I was bitterly lonely a lot of the time. And my mother smoked since the beginning. I don't really remember feeling genuiniely loved as a child. Well, I was diagnosed with chronic asthma, and have to take medication every day. But I don't blame my mother. After I found out what tragic life she had as a child, I realised that she actually did the very best she could. It taught me a lesson in forgiveness like few others.

During all of what happened, the Lord showed me what people go through. Not to punish me, but to prepare me for my calling. I was to be there for others who go through all kinds of suffering. The Lord showed me how He's able to change everyting. He called me into workplace ministry 18 months ago. Yes, sometimes I'm sad about things that happen. But what makes it all worthwhile is being able to help another out of something that's too much too handle by themselves. And when such a person is free, and has courage to carry on once more, the fulfillment does make all the difference. Knowing what our brothers and sisters go through helps us to have deep compassion for them. And that helps us to be a true blessing to others.

Just please don't give up, my sister. The Lord will make a way. Even if it looks hopeless. Even if it looks so convincing that there's no way out, don't lose hope. If you need to chat, please PM me?

 

[Onlythingavailable]

Praying.

 

[I need help]

Please don't be so sad! Everybody loves you. You so beautiful God's creation. And you future baby too.

 

[Lily76_]

praying

 

[HisW0rd]

Thank You everyone, God Bless, I love you...

 

[fields316_2000]

I’m sorry you feel this way. First let me say that the child is a blessing and has a specific purpose so the Lord has a plan for he/she. Second you still have the chance to have that perfect Godly family. It’s never too late …he can get saved now or later and surprise you with out having any demons in him. Third, I’m sorry for disappointing you, I cut my ties with my former situations just like we talked about and have been dealing with my horrible situation all alone and with only my prayers. I hope your ok - ced

 

[mikki]

Praying for you and your baby. Mother MAry, pelase look out for these children of God and protect them from harm.

 

[Forealzchola]

All I can say is be positive and think positive..this baby is going to be able to feel your every negative emotion, fear and stress...you dont want your baby receiving these memories and emotions from you in the womb

 

[heavensangel1964]

Hello Hisw0rd

I love YOU, and Father God Loves YOU!

HUGS


My Sweet, Heavenly, Eternal, Loving Father God....

I offer up to thee Hisw0rd and her unborn child to thee.....

Hisw0rd is suffering so much, Lord........

I am shedding tears for her as I am typing this prayer response......

Please, please.......

My Sweetest Lord and My Most Loving Father God.....

Please open you most Sweetest, Heavenly, Eternal, Loving Heart to Her......

Place you most loving arms around her right now......

Your most loving blanket of peace.......

Please fill Hisw0rd with your loving peace......

My Sweet, Heavenly, Eternal, Loving Father God.......

Please Bless Hisw0rd, and her unborn child.......

And shower both with your loving graces.......

Let her know that You have her and her child in the palm of your loving hands.....

And that you will take care of them both.....

I really feel your loving peace right now, Sweet Heavenly, Eternal, Loving Father God.......

I place all my love and trust in thee......

For I know that you will take care of both, Hisw0rd and her unborn child.....

Thank you, My Lord and My Father God.....

I Love YOU!

And I claim this special prayer request, In The Name Of The Father, Son, And Holy Spirit.....

AMEN!

"Happy Birthday, My Baby, Sweet Jesus!"

"I Love YOU!"

 

[Stephanie7]

God forgive her, she knows not what she is saying about the child in her womb, help her in a way that only You can help,. LORD, she is right, it's not us going through this, it's her, and even though we are trying to encourage and help her, she is not comforted. Grant her the comfort and help she is needing, not because of what we say but because of what You know she is needing at this time, In Jesus Name, Amen

 

[ido]

MOD HAT ON

This thread has been moved to Recovery and has undergone a thread clean-up so it conforms to Recovery FSG's. Please PM me if you have any questions.

MOD HAT OFF​

 

[asianangel]

You are such a beautiful creation, loving even though someone hurt you (he sounds like a total loser by the way...stealing money Sorry just had to get that out.