First was Catholic. I used to be one. But man, it was not a great time. Their idea of mass is all wrong. Its ritual repetitiveness is not my idea of a breathing Church at all. The pastor got up and said a few things and then everyone is forced to give the exact same responses throughout the procession. The hymns are still nice, but the atmosphere is depressing to say the least. It was like being in the assembly of the dead, that was the feeling.
Then I went to my protestant church with the guitars and joyful hymns. With the off-the-cuff pastors preaching the word into my life. This was much more comforting and indeed relevant to my christian walk than the hyper ritualized mass of RCC. Where we talked about community projects openly and took the sacraments in unison.
I want to encourage every Catholic on here to please try going to a protestant church at least once. Just to see how different it is. I think you're going to find it much more liberating.
What you are describing as "Protestant", isn't Protestant, but only reflective of a very modern set of practices of some Protestant groups.
If you were to visit my Lutheran church you'd likely have a hard time telling a lot of difference from the Catholic Mass. There's a reason for that, Lutherans retained the historic forms of Christian worship and practice as they had been for centuries. Worship forms that are older than even the Apostles, because their origin comes from the way the ancient Jews worshiped (and, also, how modern Jews continue to worship).
It's interesting that you describe it as not "a breathing Church", because it's really the exact opposite. The Liturgy is alive, it is the Church
breathing. What you describe as ritual and repetativeness is the ancient rhythm, the inhaling and exhaling, of Christ's Body together in worship to receive God's Word and celebrate God's Sacraments. It is the living, breathing, Spirit-filled worship of God's people.
I suspect that what you experienced was simply your own prejudices, and what you liked wasn't something more spiritual--but rather simply something perhaps more comfortable with your own views.
The Liturgy does a lot of things well, and one of those things is that it doesn't let us bring much of ourselves into it.
Back in my Evangelical/Pentecostal days there was a song we used to sing, that had the words,
"I'm coming back to the heart of worship
And it's all about you,
It's all about you, Jesus"
But honestly? It's an empty platitude. Consider the first verse:
"When the music fades
All is stripped away
And I simply come
Longing just to bring
Something that's of worth
That will bless your heart
I'll bring you more than a song
For a song in itself
Is not what you have required
You search much deeper within
Through the way things appear
You're looking into my heart"
That's a whole lot of "me" in those lines, and like, nothing about Jesus actually.
But these kinds of songs, and certain kinds of worship really are about "me", it's about either what I can do, or what I can bring, or what I can get. And so it really comes down, boiled away, into entering into one's own private world.
The Liturgy doesn't allow that to happen. Because it really isn't about you, or about me. It's
leitourgeia, the "public act" of God's people, gathered, centered around Christ as He is present and giving of Himself through Word and Sacrament. A breathing, living, engagement of God and His people, together. It simply can never be about me here. It really can only ever be about Jesus in the Liturgy.
I don't matter in the Liturgy, I am merely one voice in a chorus of voices that extends between earth and heaven.
-CryptoLutheran