Psychotic

in 03 to 05, I just had turned 18. I didn’t care about ppl, all I wanted where my selfish desires.

In 05 I was dating someone. I was doing every drug I could get my hands on. In April of 05 I did magic mushrooms. In May of 05 I started to slip into a psychotic episode.

That May I walked around OKC in no certain direction. I had a gripping fear I gave my ex HIV.

I walk to a pay phone and call the cops. I go to jail. I get out in five days but I thought I was in a dawn of the dead movie. I take five xtc trying to kill myself. I go back to jail. A lot happened and it has all stayed with me to this day. I went thru a psychotic episode for seven months. My ex breaks up with me. In 06 I gave my life to Jesus. I had the most profound joy and peace ever experienced. In 08 after smoking weed I thought I was dead and at His Judgment. I’ve suffered this whole time. At one point I was put on klonopin, it helped greatly. Today tho docs aren’t so easy to prescribe it.


The bad trip taught me to love others. It was kinda like a moral compass if that makes sense.


I suffer yes, but I love God the God of the Bible.

And I love ppl also. I’m just tired of suffering.

I don’t have HIV btw, me and her went out separate ways. I hope she’s happy!