CRAZY_CAT_WOMAN
My dad died 1/12/2023. I'm still devastated.
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I read that in the bible somewhere,so many people have many spouses.
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Teenager having sex
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sunlover1
Beloved, Let us love one another
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No, actually you didn't read that in the Bible.
In fact, what did Jesus say to the woman at the well?
You're sleeping with that guy and so he's your hubby?
Nope.
Remember that cool story?
Check it out.
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CRAZY_CAT_WOMAN
My dad died 1/12/2023. I'm still devastated.
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Remember this story,she was a virgin,he had to marry her,because he had sex with her.
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CRAZY_CAT_WOMAN
My dad died 1/12/2023. I'm still devastated.
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But was the first guy,she slept her husband,mean every guy she sleeps with wouldn't be her husband.
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sunlover1
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So he wasn't married to her even though he had had sex with her.
So then we can see that if you have sex with someone
it means nothing except that you've ..had sex with someone.
It does NOT mean you're married.
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lawtonfogle
My solace my terror, my terror my solace.
Guy sleeps with three virgins, they are all his wives (in OT times). Woman does the same, she is put to death for adultery (as too are the other guys). The Old Testament was of the 'one man, one or more females' form of marriage.
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lawtonfogle
My solace my terror, my terror my solace.
So he wasn't married to her even though he had had sex with her.
So then we can see that if you have sex with someone
it means nothing except that you've ..had sex with someone.
It does NOT mean you're married.
Depends upon the sexes. You used married female having sex with a man, which is listed as adultery and punished by death. The 'you are married to them' is for a man (virgin or not) having sex with a virgin female. And they were married, per Deuteronomy.
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This is one thing that made me so mad with sex education in schools. Most of the sex-ed today is abstinence only. They basically tell you that protection is pointless and don't have sex. The thing is, they are going to have sex anyway. However, while they are having sex, they don't use protection because they've been told (by important, official, knowledgeable school people) that protection is pointless.
Now, I am a 21 year old male who is a virgin. I know there are others like me out there, waiting for marriage. BUT! Kids are going to have sex. Just accept it. It's going to happen. Many parents I know are making fools of themselves by thinking that their son/daughter won't drink before 21, won't have sex before marriage, won't try drugs, etc. I feel bad for them because when they find out, they're going to be humiliated in front of their family and friends because they put their kids on this "better than that" pedestal.
Make protection available for your kids. If they're going to wait, then they will wait. Worst case scenario there is that a $12 box of condoms is wasted. However, if they are going to have sex, then the money was worth reducing the worry about a potential grandchild, or them contracting some disease. I know I've deviated a little from the OP, but I think this is something that all parents need to hear.
Now, I am a 21 year old male who is a virgin. I know there are others like me out there, waiting for marriage. BUT! Kids are going to have sex. Just accept it. It's going to happen. Many parents I know are making fools of themselves by thinking that their son/daughter won't drink before 21, won't have sex before marriage, won't try drugs, etc. I feel bad for them because when they find out, they're going to be humiliated in front of their family and friends because they put their kids on this "better than that" pedestal.
Make protection available for your kids. If they're going to wait, then they will wait. Worst case scenario there is that a $12 box of condoms is wasted. However, if they are going to have sex, then the money was worth reducing the worry about a potential grandchild, or them contracting some disease. I know I've deviated a little from the OP, but I think this is something that all parents need to hear.
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A gang is different from sex. A gun is an instrument of destruction, condom is an instrument of prevention.
How did I come to this conclusion? The boy has a choice, it's up to him to live up to Christian principles or not. It's obvious he has chosen the opposite which comes along with a lot of negative implications. A condom will stop those things from happening to him while attempts to stop him from having sex are continued.
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united4Peace
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I had sex before I was married (without my parents knowing it).
The best thing they could've done, if they'd found out, is accepted that I was an adult (because I was, at the time) and that I was making my own decisions. They didn't have to agree with them, of course. But they couldn't really stop me, either.
I say it's better to provide protection to your son and educate him than to just condemn his actions. Sure, you may not support what he's doing. But is contracting an STD or getting a girl pregnant really worth avoiding getting him protection? I would contest that it is not.
Just my personal opinions... so sorry for your pain
Totally agree!
We bought our kids protection...HOWEVER we also had a long talk about waiting for marriage or being in a long term relationship as once one loses their virginity they cannot get it back. My husband stressed that fact that the first time is very special.
We are giving them the benifit of the doubt that they will wait...however if hormones do take over they will have some protection which is better than none at all.
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quintessentialramble
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The only problem with your theory is that people, including teenagers, are sinners, and even the most well-disciplined and most well-brought up christian teenagers have still rebelled; sometimes they just question things. On the other side, there parents who lack all moral compass and sometimes their children will seek to be better. I know many a PK who wish to be atheist. What is very odd is that I am the only person I know (besides celebs) who came from a non-religious background and joined the church...this seems to be a dying breed.
Now, as to why people don't rebuke? Well, because of society. Society has developed in such a way that we are actually not able to do or say anything to anyone over 18, even if we are related to them, if they wish us not to. An 18-year old can ask their parents to no longer contact them, and the parents either have to, or risk being arrested for harassment. The reality is that the law, and culture surrounding the law has developed into a compass of what's best for everybody, and since everybody's different and has different views, you can't please everyone...so everything becomes socially unacceptable. In other words, we have created a relative truth to be above absolute truth.
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JAM2b
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Sexual protection should always be encouraged. Although I don't know if you should provide it for him directly or take him somewhere that he can obtain it himself. We live in a time of casual and easy sex, and people are just going to do it. In our society as a whole, sex is pretty much expected, especially if the relationship has lasted any length of time. The temptation is too much for many to bear, especially adolescents.
However, at 16 that is too young to be making those kinds of decisions, especially if he is breaking laws and not being responsible. Even if it is legal for a 16 year old to consent to sex in your state, he is still too young. That is evidenced by the other choices he is making. I think therapy would be called for for this level of behaviors. Your whole family could probably benefit from it.
It is illegal to enter someone's house without their permission and to damage their property. It would not be unreasonable to get the authorities involved. He probably felt he could get away with it because it was his grandparent's home, but it's still not OK. If consequences at home are ineffective for whatever reason, some real world consequences might be helpful. There's a billboard near where I live that has pictures of a sherif's deputy, state police officer, and city police officer, all with their arms crossed and stern expressions. It says, "If your parents can't stop you, we will." At the very least, he can be on the radar for officials in the community to offer interventions.
However, at 16 that is too young to be making those kinds of decisions, especially if he is breaking laws and not being responsible. Even if it is legal for a 16 year old to consent to sex in your state, he is still too young. That is evidenced by the other choices he is making. I think therapy would be called for for this level of behaviors. Your whole family could probably benefit from it.
It is illegal to enter someone's house without their permission and to damage their property. It would not be unreasonable to get the authorities involved. He probably felt he could get away with it because it was his grandparent's home, but it's still not OK. If consequences at home are ineffective for whatever reason, some real world consequences might be helpful. There's a billboard near where I live that has pictures of a sherif's deputy, state police officer, and city police officer, all with their arms crossed and stern expressions. It says, "If your parents can't stop you, we will." At the very least, he can be on the radar for officials in the community to offer interventions.
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