Usually I include TLDR's for articles I post online, but I would ask that if you respond to this post, that you read everything first.
Hello, I would like to introduce a topic that has been bothering me for several years. Before I begin, I would like to give a little disclaimer that what I'm about to say is pretty depressing matter, at least for me anyway.
A bit about me before I start rambling on about something you may or may not agree with. For starters, I am a full blown pessimist. Everyone knows that one guy where the skies are always gray, the glass is always half empty, and the grass is always greener on the other side. Unfortunately, that's always been me as far as I can remember. Next, I have to mention I am a christian, but unfortunately, a glaring side effect of being negative about everything is massive skepticism. For example, I'm the guy who can't decide whether to be encouraged or discouraged by the fact that people in the bible who saw Jesus perform miracles with their own eyes still can't see the truth, and consequently turn away. Is it encouraging in that the people in the bible are more like us than we thought, or discouraging in that if they couldn't see it, how could I possibly see it? Anyway, that's a topic for another time. What I'm trying to say is that what I'm dealing with may only be from my point of view, and you may not relate -- and that's completely ok.
Alright, now for the question I've asked countless times over the years. Why would I ever want to have children? Now you may see this as a silly question. I however take this to a whole new level of serious. When you decide to have kids, you are bringing in another human being into the world. With that being said, that person is going to have a soul, and assuming they live up to the age of understanding, they will be judged by God when they die. Nobody is perfect. You hear about people who are brought up in a christian home, loved immensely and receive the best support possible in their walk of faith who STILL manage to turn away and die unsaved. This remains a sad result of the free will we have been given. Now my question is this. If there is the SLIGHTEST chance, even a 1/1,000,000th of a chance that your child will die before they are saved in their lifetime, why would you risk it? Nobody deserves being put on a playing field (or so to speak) where there is even an astronomically small chance of going to hell, where suffering is infinite and eternal. I often sit and think about this topic, and many-a-times I've come to the conclusion that if I were a miscarriage it would have been a whole lot easier than having to live every day worried about whether you'll be saved the moment of your death. I often wish I was never born, never given the slightest chance of not finding the faith and suffering eternally. I never want to have to ultimate accountability, the ultimate responsibility, the ultimate weight on my chest knowing that my own kid, brought into the world by me is at a chance of not finding the light for them-self, and ending up in Hell. Have you ever read about how terrible hell is? It's just not worth the chance that they could slip up within their lifetime. Nobody deserves hell. Nobody. I've always heard that if we could all be dangled over hell for a second, everyone would believe. By now you've probably noticed how I focus so intently on worse case scenarios and negativity. But you can't deny that when you bring a child into the world, your putting them at a very real risk of not being saved. Some people are motivated into action with faith with their eye on the prize of heaven. I'm motivated into faith so I don't go to hell.
I would like to mention a few arguments that I've heard in response to this. Some people have mentioned that God can urge you to have children. I believe that this is %100 true. But being my skeptic self, assuming we all are given free will, still puts that child into a risk of hell. In short, if they end up in hell, who's decision was it really if God knows what decisions we're going to make before we make them? Had you just not given birth to someone initially, there wouldn't be a risk. Another argument I've heard is that the bible says in Genesis 1:28: “Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth and subdue it and have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and over every living thing that moves on the earth.” I understand that we've been commanded to multiply in a sense, but my original point still stands.
For the record, I have asked my Pastor and two elders about this issue. Their responses were the following:
My Pastor told me to look at God the way the Hebrews did, taking god for each individual part of what he is and accepting it as more of a bundle, instead of the way the Greeks think, by trying to mix everything together and observing as a whole, looking at contradicting features and denying it altogether. Unfortunately, looking at it differently didn't remove the problem for me.
One Elder told me that everything has risk, and pretty much dismissed my point.
The other Elder I asked told me he would try to find me an answer, and I heard back from him a few days later, when he told me straight up "I don't have a good answer for that."
Sometimes I wish I would have never been created and given free will. I would have been much happier, after all obliviousness is bliss. If I could do anything, ANYTHING to insure that I would have blind faith till the day I die, I would do it in a heartbeat. But because that's not how it works, I think daily how much easier miscarriages or young children who die in freak accidents have it, with straight road to heaven (at least I hope). Here I am, stuck in a constant loop where I can't kill myself otherwise it wouldn't insure heaven, and constantly worried about whether or not I'll be in the faith the moment I pass. I could go on forever complaining about the misery of everyday life but for once I'm trying my hardest to see the bright side.
Thanks for reading, feel free to reply however you would like. I would consider myself a friendly guy, but If you could please keep the topic off me, I would appreciate it. By the way, just because my Pastor and two Elders didn't have an answer for me, I'm by no means saying you guys can't answer my question. I'm willing to take any wisdom or advice I can get regarding scripture around this topic.
