Losing faith

Hi Ladybee22.Please know that God loves you very much.He wants the best for us.He is gracious.He is our Heavenly Father who forgives our sins and debts if we repent from our heart and confess it to him.Please keep that in mind.Don't leave the Lord (and the Church) please.
You know we are all human and make mistakes.I don't know how your friend behaved,perhaps she was pushy and didn't talk gently.Yes it needs a lot of wisdom and love to give a good advice to a friend,especially one about faith and salvation.She must have been harsh,but please forgive her,I'm sure she cares for you.None of us is perfect.Some christians are like children in Christ,some are more mature in Christ.It means those who are more mature in Christ can represent his love more toward people.We all grow from childhood to adultess spiritually.God is a father who wants the best for his children.He doesn't want to control you.I don't know if you have children,but when you do you will know that.Look at it like that.Jesus loved us so much that he gave his life for us and suffered the punishment of our sins on the cross.He loves you.Please never forget this.The Lord bless you and keep you.The Lord make his face to shine on you and be merciful to you.The Lord turn his face on you and give you peace.

Ignore her and continue to go to church. But are you having premarital sex? You don't have to tell the board (in fact, please don't), but if you are, she did have a point about that one.

read the bibile daily,thats the only way that god himself can answer all your questions,but my advice for you would be to ask god to give you strentgh and wisdom to do the right thing,our god is a righthneouss god and he wants us to be righthneous so that he can fully use us and bless us beyond our imagination,god loves you.

ladybee22 said:

I went to see a friend yesterday & I feel she was quite pushy with her beliefs & interfering in my relationship. She asked me if I was putting my boyfriend before God & telling me that if I was shutting down on church etc it's because I know God would 'challenge' me on premarital sex. She was also disapproving towards me when I told her I wanted to settle down soon ("What happened to missionary work in Africa"?) She also told me that I have to make a choice whether to live for God or not. I left with a bad taste in my mouth & seriously considering whether I should just stop going to Church! I don't appreciate people telling me how to live my life & shoving their views down my throat. How do I politely tell her to mind her own business?

Click to expand...

Faith isn't about church. It is about day to day living. If this church is causing problems with God, leave the church, go somewhere else.

We aren't in a religion of condemnation and Law. We are in a religion of tolerance, of grace and truth.

It is better for someone to sit back and get rest and repentance, to not judge and condemn people in their hearts... then to be crying, 'do this' and 'do that' and boasting about how they are so approved by God.

I, personally, don't believe because of some church or because of "friends"... but because of what Jesus teaches. It is the right way to live life. God is everywhere.

I think charity work and missionary work can be great... if done in humility. But, if you look at the history, missionaries have often come with bad messages hurting the cultures in these countries. This has caused strong resentment against Christianity in many of these countries and we have to try and work back from that.

Africa's definitely a great place to go, but what they need is guidance on infrastructure. Teaching people how to fish, rather then giving them fish.

Its not the churches fault your friend has scorned you. Fornication is a sin according to biblical standards. God doesn't have these standards to be cruel or mean-but it is what is best for us. She shouldn't have outright judged you-and could have been more christ like. If you want to go to the same church-ignore her and I would attend a bible study.

ladybee22 said:

I went to see a friend yesterday & I feel she was quite pushy with her beliefs & interfering in my relationship. She asked me if I was putting my boyfriend before God & telling me that if I was shutting down on church etc it's because I know God would 'challenge' me on premarital sex. She was also disapproving towards me when I told her I wanted to settle down soon ("What happened to missionary work in Africa"?) She also told me that I have to make a choice whether to live for God or not. I left with a bad taste in my mouth & seriously considering whether I should just stop going to Church! I don't appreciate people telling me how to live my life & shoving their views down my throat. How do I politely tell her to mind her own business?

Click to expand...

You should take a hard look at yourself and be completely honest.

1) Are you living in sexual sin? Not according to your standards, or my standards, or your friends standards but according to the ONLY standards that matter. Gods.

2) Do you agree with God's standards (regardless of if you are living according to them or not)?

3) Are you more offended at your friend or at God for having the standards He does?

4) Do you believe you can live both as a Christian and in the world?

See if we are Christians God has already told us how to live our lives and He has "shoved His views" down our throats. He doesn't ask us, He commands us. Do you feel your faith slipping because you doubt God or because you don't want to do what you are commanded to do? There's a big difference.

.

If we all went around telling each other how we think they should be living we'd all be in trouble, and many of us will become discouraged instead of knowing that God knows how sincere your efforts have been and how much you TRULY love Him. Here is a scripture which addresses exactly what your friend has done:

"Accept him whose faith is weak, without passing judgment on disputable matters. One man's faith allows him to eat everything, but another man, whose faith is weak, eats only vegetables. The man who eats everything must not look down on him who does not, and the man who does not eat everything must not condemn the man who does, for God has accepted him.Who are you to judge someone else's servant? To his own master he stands or falls. And he will stand, for The Lord is able to make him stand."
Romans 14:1-4

If you have accepted Jesus then his spiritual protection would ease your anger in the slow lane to where anger meets the same level as peace. To control your feelings of pain, worry and anger takes absolute control of the mind and heart.
I always imagine the face of Jesus when I close my eyes for a while and prepare what Christian opinion should I say to my friend, family or church member when I visit again in the future.
I never let my past memories interfere my future goals. Jesus is always renewing my mind with feelings of hope, erasing pain attached to past memories. Helping the Africans free themselves from the curse of violence and poverty takes courage as much as a soldier to war. I hope your boyfriend becomes like you being very courageous and committed in marriage as well, so that your children can grow up to become future missionaries to turn Africa into a Christian continent and everywhere else so that when Jesus returns it would make his job easier knowing that most of the hard work has been done by you and other missionaries.

I think you need to be humble, not react snappy and see that she has your best interests at heart. You can still be in a relationship and do your missionary work in Africa if that's what you still want. Maybe the Lord has another plan for you.

No one is going to say it's ok to have premarital sex and you shouldn't be doing it if you are, you cannot pick and choose the elements of being a practicing Christian.

Maybe you can see if there are other churches you may like and attend one you are happy with, but to stop attending all together on such a small matter doesn't seem right considering you are attending to praise the Lord. I hope you don't harden your heart and heed the advice on here and most importantly pray and ask for help from the Lord.
Well done for seeking advice, if you want to abstain from premarital sex and your boyfriend does not then maybe he doesn't care about you as much as you think, if he cares he will respect what is biblical and if it is too hard to abstain then don't leave yourselves in situations where you know temptation will be too much (alone together at night, sleeping over etc).

I hope this helps, God bless.
Mike

ladybee22 said:

...I left with a bad taste in my mouth & seriously considering whether I should just stop going to Church!

Click to expand...

I think you must first ask your self what sort of faith are you losing if you are willing to throw it away to spite a friend?

Or is this not a matter of faith but a controversy between two imperfect humans? To leave the church and join another would be a possible move that wouldn't sacrifice faith, but to give up faith entirely? That is the suggestion of your thread title.

2 Corinthians 13:5 says, "Examine yourselves, whether you be in the faith."


God Bless,
Drew

Don't let your friend stop u from going to heaven

Hm. It takes a lot of self-control to deal with people who are prying into your personal life without your accession. That can cause a lot of emotion, but just live with the even-handedness of, "I don't really consider that I'm accountable to you." Be strong in your faith.

I know a lot of us, including me, have worries with where you are in your relationships with others; but I'm not sure you've really asked us for advice on that?

In any event, your position toward this person -- or your other friends -- should be looking at something very straightforward: Is my relationship with God more important than this relationship? Why would I "chuck" a relationship with God because of what's happening in this relationship? Whether it's the prying advisor or the significant other, that seems to me the more important question.

I wish you well. I hope for you!