My dad has problems again

[Michie]

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My church at Christmastime. I tried to start another thread but was unsuccessful.View attachment 366288

Very nice!

 

[FaithT]

Very nice!

Thanks! our stained glass windows (not shown in the picture) are dated but that’s the way it goes, LOL.

 

[Angeldove97]

I haven't talked yet about how my dad is doing because it's feeling more difficult for me to handle. He had a seizure a week ago (I think I said this) but he still has not recovered the ability to swallow and it's really concerning me. He is also constantly expressing his desire to die and remains determinedly defiant in resisting the therapists that come in. I don't know how I'm going to sleep. My brother (I have mixed feelings about him, he does assure me that he won't let me be destitute but I just don't know) is pushing me to get up earlier and he is kind of right because it facilitates the receipt of phone calls but I'm not doing a good enough job of it (the getting up).

Not sure if this fits your family, but my friends have created a text group and/or a private Facebook page to share updates. I know every family is different but no, you don't have to talk to anyone (we will let you know when there's something to share) and no you don't have to allow anyone over your home. Setting healthy boundaries while keeping the family in the loop at some level is important.

 

[RileyG]

Thanks! our stained glass windows (not shown in the picture) are dated but that’s the way it goes, LOL.

I personally love old fashioned Churches, especially those built before Vatican II

 

[FaithT]

I personally love old fashioned Churches, especially those built before Vatican II

Mine isn’t like that…..it was built in the early 1970’s and looks it.

 

[FaithT]

I personally love old fashioned Churches, especially those built before Vatican II

I do too.

 

[Michie]

Any updates @Lady Bug?

 

[Lady Bug]

Any updates @Lady Bug?

I only have two non-Muslim women with me for the funeral and I wish I had more, so that I wouldn't feel outnumbered by Muslims. The imam claims that any women attending the funeral are supposed to sit in the back of the room while the men can sit in the front but I find that unfair since my dad loved me more than anyone else attending IMHO.

Also, I tried to tell my brother to tell A not to invite other people besides A himself and his sister and maybe their kids, but my brother says he can't do anything about it now (I strongly disagree). He said to just tolerate it for one day.

 

[Michie]

I only have two non-Muslim women with me for the funeral and I wish I had more, so that I wouldn't feel outnumbered by Muslims. The imam claims that any women attending the funeral are supposed to sit in the back of the room while the men can sit in the front but I find that unfair since my dad loved me more than anyone else attending IMHO.

Also, I tried to tell my brother to tell A not to invite other people besides A himself and his sister and maybe their kids, but my brother says he can't do anything about it now (I strongly disagree). He said to just tolerate it for one day.

Yeah. On the day of your father’s funeral. He is quite the case.

 

[Lady Bug]

Yeah. On the day of your father’s funeral. He is quite the case.

Every day he is. I feel like I have less freedom with dad gone, ironically. I haven't even gotten to the life insurance updates but I don't like to type on the phone.

 

[Lady Bug]

The thing is, he puts on a different show in public and it causes others to have a favorable impression of him. I find it hard to tell people what he's really like because people might not believe me.

 

[Michie]

The thing is, he puts on a different show in public and it causes others to have a favorable impression of him. I find it hard to tell people what he's really like because people might not believe me.

That’s what abusers do LB. You are seriously going to have to set some boundaries. If he is not equitable about everything you can easily put everything on hold till he decides to grow up.

 

[Lady Bug]

That’s what abusers do LB. You are seriously going to have to set some boundaries. If he is not equitable about everything you can easily put everything on hold till he decides to grow up.

He will simply come to the house if I quit answering him. He has done this last week when he merely thought I was too late in answering a text. He owns half the house so it's not like the police will listen to me. No wonder some women don't know how to get away.

 

[Michie]

He will simply come to the house if I quit answering him. He has done this last week when he merely thought I was too late in answering a text. He owns half the house so it's not like the police will listen to me. No wonder some women don't know how to get away.

The police would listen to you. You are the one who lives there. He doesn’t. It does not matter if half the house is his. He is not allowed to harass you.

 

[Lady Bug]

Everyone here already knows, I am going to the funeral as a non-Muslim when they all (except for the very few non-Muslims who are coming) are thinking I'm Muslim, and it will be imperative that I don't participate in the prayers, and that is going to cause problems and I am hoping that I can even sleep tonight, knowing this. I'll probably be thrown out of there if I'm not wearing one of their kinds of headscarves.

Can A Non Muslim Attend A Muslim Funeral - Religious Question

Can A Non Muslim Attend A Muslim Funeral ? Explore guidelines for non-Muslims attending a Muslim funeral, respectful behavior, and the cultural significance of the ceremony to foster understanding.

www.religiousquestion.com

 

[Susie~Q]

He will simply come to the house if I quit answering him. He has done this last week when he merely thought I was too late in answering a text. He owns half the house so it's not like the police will listen to me. No wonder some women don't know how to get away.

You can still tell the police, first, you are living there, he isn't and second, he is harassing you. I am sure the law would be on your side.

 

[Susie~Q]

Everyone here already knows, I am going to the funeral as a non-Muslim when they all (except for the very few non-Muslims who are coming) are thinking I'm Muslim, and it will be imperative that I don't participate in the prayers, and that is going to cause problems and I am hoping that I can even sleep tonight, knowing this. I'll probably be thrown out of there if I'm not wearing one of their kinds of headscarves.

Can A Non Muslim Attend A Muslim Funeral - Religious Question

Can A Non Muslim Attend A Muslim Funeral ? Explore guidelines for non-Muslims attending a Muslim funeral, respectful behavior, and the cultural significance of the ceremony to foster understanding.

www.religiousquestion.com

I wouldn't do anything except the bare minimum, from what I read in the article, if the woman is NOT Muslim, she does NOT have to wear a scarf, I sure wouldn't.

 

[Susie~Q]

The thing is, he puts on a different show in public and it causes others to have a favorable impression of him. I find it hard to tell people what he's really like because people might not believe me.

I know what you mean, so many men are that way. My first husband was that way, everyone thought he was so wonderful, well, he wasn't, I won't go into detail, but, it was NOT a good marriage. He was sort of narcissistic too, like your brother but different in a lot of way.

 

[Michie]

Been praying for you today LB. I hope things went better than expected.

 

[Lady Bug]

Been praying for you today LB. I hope things went better than expected.

It went smoother than expected but I'm so tired after getting probably only 1 hour sleep last night. Yet I tried taking a nap and couldn't fall asleep for the life of me. I'm going mental with fatigue. There are a couple of new problems though