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Kid's Corporal Punishment - a Risk to Mental Health

Paidiske

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I am not sure what you mean.
I mean that they are using clinical scales to measure irrational thinking, but those clinical scales don't necessarily relate to the beliefs and attitudes which drive abuse.
The articles referred to the difference in thinking and beliefs between those who are compromised due to psychological distress and those who are not.
But not the difference between those who abuse and those who do not, some of whom might be "compromised," but some of whom are not.
Yes but there's a difference between believing in controlled dicipline to help a child become a good citizen and abusing a child.
Not if the discipline is abusive, and for many people, it is. That's what I've been trying to point out to you. There are plenty of people exercising "controlled discipline" which is way over the line of abuse.
Anyone who believes in breaking legs and stubbing smokes in an infants face is good for making a good and healthy citizen has an error in their thinking. In other words they are deluded.
But this is not the majority of physical abuse. Remember, we're talking about hitting a child with an implement, or more than six times, or hard enough to leave a mark. Plenty of people will do that, but will never break a limb.
The only outlet would be to deal with the unresolved anger.
Some people learn (for example) to go and hit a punching bag, rather than a person. My point is, there's not only one way to express aggression.
Parents who abuse don't intend to abuse their kids but end up crossing a line due to their inability to control their feelings.
You haven't shown this to be true. Sure, they don't admit that what they're doing is abuse, but plenty of them do intend to do exactly what they're doing.
So its your personal opinion then.
My professional opinion as someone with experience in primary prevention programmes.
What does this actually mean.
It means that what is appropriate in one setting might not be appropriate in another. Think (as a frivolous example) of Captain von Trapp trying to raise his children as if they were naval subordinates.
No its not.
Of course it is.
Feelings have a physical effect on people. You can't smile when you cry, you can't cry when your happy. Unless its tears of joy which is completely different to tears of sadnes. You can't be positive when feeling down and you can't feel agressive when your at peace in yourself.
However, anger is not necessarily "negative." There are times when anger is appropriate, and when it functions as a protective mechanism (for example. Expecting people to always feel "positive," no matter their circumstances, is inappropriate and unhealthy.
But then according to your logic if everything is a subjective value judgement then so are maladaptive beliefs. Its a value judgement that the belief is maladaptive.
Which is what I have been saying all the way through the thread; that this whole conversation is premised on value judgements about particular behaviours and the beliefs which drive them.
Your misrepresenting what I just said.
If so, you have done a very poor job of explaining your view.
Because we don't determine what is abuse by the subjective beliefs of a parent.
I'm not saying we have to agree with them. But I am describing the abusive parents' point of view. And I see no reason why that description "cannot be right," and many reasons why it is more often right than the "out of control" explanation.
First you have just supported what I have been saying that parents thinking is compromised and they don't see things like healthy parents when you say they don't recognise the damage they do due to their beliefs.
That is not what I am saying. I'm not saying their "thinking is compromised." I am saying they place a higher value on the short term benefits (as they see them) of abusive discipline, and discount potential long term harm.
Because you are not recognising the difference between a belief and reality your conflating the belief as reality.
Not at all. But I am saying that we need to recognise the beliefs of the abusive parents, and take them seriously, if we are to have any hope of challenging them successfully.
If we can "say it" say that their beliefs and thinking is in error, they have the "wrong ones" (beliefs) as you say then we can say their beliefs and thinking is irrational.
Being in error is not the same as being irrational. You can be quite rational, and yet be in error.
Its not something good and healthy people and society believe.
You yourself were pointing out that only relatively recently in our history, it was something pretty much everyone in society believed. I wouldn't say none of them were "good;" just that they did the best they had with what they knew. We now know better, so we can try to do better.
If theres a lot of long work to do then that also implies that its not just the beliefs, the belief is the symptom of something deeper which is what I have also been saying ie the risk factors and environments that cultivate violence and abuse that need supporting and changing (restructuring).
I would agree if we were both talking about restructuring cultural norms around violence, hierarchy, rigid roles, power and control, and so on. I suspect you are not.
I disagree because its the same mechanisms for all negative beliefs.
Again, that is a subjective value judgement.
These are the actual mechanisms for the negative beliefs that underpin abuse and violence. Hierarchies and rigid roles, or traditional roles are just the symptoms and only a few examples of many examples of how people think about abuse and violence.
But you don't need any of those traits in order to hold the beliefs which underpin abuse.
It seems to me that you want to only emphasize these particular beliefs in Hiearchies and rigid roles because of ideological reasons.
No, I want to emphasise these particular beliefs because they are the ones which have been shown to underpin and drive abuse. They are the beliefs which abusers hold, and non-abusers do not.
But they come from the same place and have the same mechanisms.
No, they don't.
Belief in a Hierarchy is not wrong itself, its not a belief in abuse and control itself.
It's the cluster together of beliefs in hierarchy, rigid roles, power and control, and acceptance of violence, which add up to abuse. So not belief in hierarchy alone, but it is part of the problem.
But a child can develop a negative belief about controlling others without their parents and family believing in abuse and control.
Sure.
Thats because if they develop psychological and emotional issues they are inclinced to believe such things.
Or because those beliefs are modelled to them as culturally normative.
Its a combination of wider beliefs and individual supceptability to take on those beliefs.
Perhaps, but individual susceptibility can't be boiled down to psychological issues.
Yes but when it comes to actually commiting abuse and violence against another, in other words putting those beliefs into action most don't abuse. They rationalise that this is not justified against another human. Its those that cannot rationalise and have the emotional intelligence that take on those beliefs.
I'm sorry, no. There are plenty of abusers who can rationalise and who do have emotional intelligence, but still believe that these things are right and appropriate.
 
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Paidiske

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Why, can you explain why.
Because they are not measuring those beliefs which drive abuse. And because those beliefs are not necessarily irrational. You've built this whole idea that the beliefs which drive abuse are irrational, and therefore anything which is true of irrational beliefs in general is true of the beliefs which drive abuse, but this is just not the case.

Just a post or so ago you were defending belief in hierarchy as "not wrong in itself," and yet we know that this is one of the beliefs which underpins abuse; do you now want to turn around and claim that that is irrational?
 
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stevevw

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But not the difference between those who abuse and those who do not, some of whom might be "compromised," but some of whom are not.
It explained the difference. Those who are compromised don't think rationally, they are anxious and percieve threat where others don't and have problems controlling their feelings.

Those who do not abuse are emotionally intelligent and resilient and can deal with their feelings and dispel their irrational thinking. In fact these people don't have a need to percieve a threatening world where they need to revert to abuse and violence in the first place. The articles explained this difference.
Not if the discipline is abusive, and for many people, it is. That's what I've been trying to point out to you. There are plenty of people exercising "controlled discipline" which is way over the line of abuse.
No I am saying theres a clear difference between the CP where people are exercising control with light smacks on the buttock leaving no marks and those who step across that line and abuse where they physically damage the child.

No amount of rationalisation that CP that crosses this line is good for a childs wellbeing and health. So therefore its irrational to persist in believing that its ok to do and believe in.
But this is not the majority of physical abuse. Remember, we're talking about hitting a child with an implement, or more than six times, or hard enough to leave a mark. Plenty of people will do that, but will never break a limb.
But your logic has to also work for those who brake a limb. If they believe that using an implement that leaves welts and bruises is ok when its obviously not due to the psychological harm. Then the same applies to more serious damage if they believe the serious damage is justified.

I would also disagree that most abuse is due to going overboard with smacking to many times and using an implement like a wooden spoon or paddle that inflicts a welt or bruise. Theres a lot of abuse by pushing, grabbing, punching, kicking, shaking violently, dropping from a hight, throwing against, gouging, cutting, burning all in the name of trying to control a childs percieved bad behaviour.

It is these more insidious forms of PA that do the damage and show how parents are not controlling themselves and are twisted in their thinking. But even when parents go overboard with smacking where they hit many times all over the body and around the head this is an act of uncontrolled anger, frustration, stress coming out as they cannot stop at the legal limit and go overboard.

Some people learn (for example) to go and hit a punching bag, rather than a person.
The key word here is "learn". Learned to take out their agression in a controlled environment. This means they recognised in themselves a weakness, a volnurability for agression. So they have some insight some emotional intelligence. But just taking agression out on the punching bag doesn't deal with the psychological propensity to get agressive in the first place.

That is what makes the difference bertween abuser and non abusers that they have some insight into themselves. So the protective factor is to help abusers "learn" and gain insight into how their agression gets the better of them. Part of that can be helping them divert their agression into other things even art in some cases. This then opens the door for them "learning" emotional intelligence.

In fact one of the articles I linked spoke about a theory where anger is regarded as a natural feeling when parenting and not something to hide from or pretend doesn't happen. Because its when things are bottled up that negative emotions come to the surface and are expressed in uncontrolled ways, The idea was to accept anger and by accepting it we talk about it thus disfusing the anger.

My point is, there's not only one way to express aggression.
I agree but that doesn't change the fact that some cannot control their agression when triggered. They have no control over what will trigger them.

Child abuse experts agree that the single factor ultimately responsible for child maltreatment is the inability of parents to control their aggressive impulses.
https://www.researchgate.net/public...ion_for_work_with_potentially_abusive_parents
 
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Paidiske

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It explained the difference. Those who are compromised don't think rationally, they are anxious and percieve threat where others don't and have problems controlling their feelings.
But amongst those who are compromised, some will abuse and some won't. And amongst those who are not compromised, some will abuse and some won't. That compromise is not the driver or cause of abuse.
No I am saying theres a clear difference between the CP where people are exercising control with light smacks on the buttock leaving no marks and those who step across that line and abuse where they physically damage the child.
Is there? Is there a clear difference between the person who smacks with a hand, and one who uses a wooden spoon? Between one who smacks six times and one who smacks ten times? Between someone who leaves no bruise, and one who leaves a bruise?

I'm not buying that argument. It's not so clear cut, at all.
But your logic has to also work for those who brake a limb.
I think breaking a limb is pretty extreme, but I can see how it could happen that someone could believe it justified under particular circumstances. (Again, makarrata comes to mind).

Conversely, your logic would have to work for every single instance of abuse. And it doesn't.
I would also disagree that most abuse is due to going overboard with smacking to many times and using an implement like a wooden spoon or paddle that inflicts a welt or bruise.
Why? Are you seriously going to tell me there are far more instances of broken limbs, than use of wooden spoons? Because I don't buy that for one second, either.
It is these more insidious forms of PA that do the damage
Well, they all do damage.
and show how parents are not controlling themselves and are twisted in their thinking.
It's not so clear cut. You listed pushing, for example; well, there's pushing and pushing, isn't there? I mean, on one end of the scale there's pushing a resisting toddler to restrain them safely in a car seat.
But even when parents go overboard with smacking where they hit many times all over the body and around the head this is an act of uncontrolled anger, frustration, stress coming out as they cannot stop at the legal limit and go overboard.
But this is not what I described as the more common forms of abuse. Are you really going to argue this for the person administering otherwise controlled discipline with a wooden spoon?
The key word here is "learn". Learned to take out their agression in a controlled environment. This means they recognised in themselves a weakness, a volnurability for agression. So they have some insight some emotional intelligence. But just taking agression out on the punching bag doesn't deal with the psychological propensity to get agressive in the first place.
No, it doesn't. But if they're hitting a punching bag instead of their kid, we're no longer in the realm of abuse. And it just goes to show that aggression itself isn't the problem.
That is what makes the difference bertween abuser and non abusers that they have some insight into themselves.
No, that's not the difference. The abuser holds beliefs which justify the abuse; and the non-abuser doesn't.
Child abuse experts agree that the single factor ultimately responsible for child maltreatment is the inability of parents to control their aggressive impulses.
You've linked that claim multiple times, but it's still blatantly false. There is no such agreement between experts, as even a quick scan of the literature will tell you.
 
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stevevw

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You haven't shown this to be true. Sure, they don't admit that what they're doing is abuse, but plenty of them do intend to do exactly what they're doing.
There may be a small number but then that just supports the idea that these parents are off their rocker. To believe that burning and fist punching a child in the face shows how off the planet their thinking is. But I don't think many parents truely believe in burning their kids as disicipline.

But the far majority who cross the line did not intend to. But once again here is that ideological and biased thinking that claims to read peoples minds and atributes certain thinking based on their own assumptions and not reality. Even when the p

"Parents spank with good intentions -- they believe it will promote good behavior, and they don't intend to harm the child.

“Parents don't want to shout or hit their kids. We do it because we're stressed and don't see another way,”

So even UNICEP supports what I am saying. Take note of the statement "We do it because we're stressed and don't see another way,”

That supports the point that much of abuse is due to psychological distress and many don't see any other way. In other words they are not thinking straight, have limited understanding and are experiencing cognitive and emotional problems.

Some emotions may get in the way of logical thinking, for example, rage, shock and panic. Thus, your emotions may drive your decisions and your past experiences may affect your emotional health.
Mental Health: Where to Get Mental Health Help
 
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Paidiske

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There may be a small number but then that just supports the idea that these parents are off their rocker.
It's not a small number. We know that parents who abuse mostly choose their abuse, in line with their beliefs and attitudes and values around parenting and discipline. They're not crossing a line because they're emotionally overwhelmed; they're not off their rocker. They are making deliberate parenting choices.
But I don't think many parents truely believe in burning their kids as disicipline.
But we are discussing corporal punishment. And many parents do believe in corporal punishment as discipline.
"Parents spank with good intentions -- they believe it will promote good behavior, and they don't intend to harm the child.
Exactly. They hold beliefs and attitudes and values which allow them to believe that their abuse is appropriate and necessary. This is exactly what I have been saying.
So even UNICEP supports what I am saying. Take note of the statement "We do it because we're stressed and don't see another way,”
That's a piece offering parenting advice, not evidence based in research. And it conflates "shouting and hitting," but they are not at all the same thing. It's not even clear that this is discussing behaviour which would meet the definition of abuse, rather than just less-than-ideal parenting.
 
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stevevw

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But amongst those who are compromised, some will abuse and some won't. And amongst those who are not compromised, some will abuse and some won't. That compromise is not the driver or cause of abuse.
This is a non-sequitur. Because some among each group do the opposite therefore none are compromised. Its also a false anaology because I have told you that there are destinct reasons why parents do and don't abuse.

The people that don;t abuse amoung the compromised group don't abuse for good reasons and thats because they have some protective factors be it some emotional intelligence that gives them insight to not go on with the negative thinking usually because they have some support, a person or organisation in their life.

Saying people who are not compromised in some way yet will still abuse is a contradiction in terms. The simple fact of abusing your own child against your natural instinct is evidence that they have an inability to empathise with their child. In psychology that is a known sign of psychological disorders or at worst psychopathology.
Is there? Is there a clear difference between the person who smacks with a hand, and one who uses a wooden spoon? Between one who smacks six times and one who smacks ten times? Between someone who leaves no bruise, and one who leaves a bruise?
Now your using my earlier argues you were objecting to. Your also creating a false anology with its use in this case. I said your logic should apply to extreme damage as its the same idea that abusers believe they are rational as you said. So more extreme harm should apply.

Like I said earlier you are right that there is not as much difference between 6 smacks and 10. But theres a lot of difference between 6 smacks and a split lip and facial bruises. But this would have to be a rational harm according to your logic and we could not say it was wrong because abuse is determined by subjective values.
I'm not buying that argument. It's not so clear cut, at all.
So its not so clear cut that a split lip and facial brusing is abuse but rather is a rational belief to hold by an abuser.
I think breaking a limb is pretty extreme, but I can see how it could happen that someone could believe it justified under particular circumstances. (Again, makarrata comes to mind).
But I don't know what your point is. Are you making a case that because abusers can somehow rationalise doing obvious damage that its OK, that its rational to do.
Conversely, your logic would have to work for every single instance of abuse. And it doesn't.
Yes it does apart from the previously discussed "harder to determine' examples like you said whether 6 or 10 slaps constitutes abuse. But the exceptions don't over rule the majority of situations where the parent abuses. There are good reasons why they are harder to determine because the evidence is harder to determine. Though some say any CP even 6 slaps is abuse.

But at this stage we have determined 6 slaps. Now 8 or 10 may not make a difference. But I am sure there is a rational reason why its six and not 10 or 2. Thats the point when there is some ambiguity it doesn't mean we cannot later find out exactly where the line is. Its just that out knowledge and understanding is not good enough at the time.

Whereas bruises, welts, cuts, split lips, hits around the head, choking, kicking and fractured or broken bones ect are more obvious and we at present know the facts that these are abuse because of the studies. Not to mention the psychological harm. As you said it may only take a small incident of abuse for a child who is already stressed from a home that feels unsafe to be traumatised.

But we have gone through this a number of times and you keep repeating this fallacy that somehow these excepts that are harder to define are the rule when they are not and then base your whole arguement on the idea that because some examples are harder to determine all abuse must be harder to determine.
Why? Are you seriously going to tell me there are far more instances of broken limbs, than use of wooden spoons? Because I don't buy that for one second, either.
No I am saying I don't think that most parents set out in their minds any particular method about how to dicipline their kids. I don't think they give it much thought. Though the traditional smacking is often used I think they abuse in many different ways that are not about smacking.

Like a backhand across the head, its done as a reaction and not some planned punishment as though the parrent is telling little Johnny to bend over the knee to get a smack.

Its more irratic than that, with hits all over the body, strangling, pushing, shaking, kicking ect which are all spur of the moment done through the heat of the moment and not planned or controlled. Thats where the worst damage is done because its reactive and uncontrolled and more likely to go overboard.
It's not so clear cut. You listed pushing, for example; well, there's pushing and pushing, isn't there? I mean, on one end of the scale there's pushing a resisting toddler to restrain them safely in a car seat.
Or pushing a child out of the way of danger. But that is clear cut in the context and intention and we can reason that out.

But this still doesn't negate that at least for abuse that we can say is abuse, from that line which will include the less severe damage like bruises and cuts to the more severe like split lips and fractures like ribs to the more extreme such as burns, fractured skulls and broken bones are all clearly abuse and cannot be rationalised as be ok to do objectively according to the science.
But this is not what I described as the more common forms of abuse. Are you really going to argue this for the person administering otherwise controlled discipline with a wooden spoon?
Lol no but weren't your previously arguing that n abuser can rationalise all sorts of damage as being ok to do. As though their thinking and beliefs were rational.

I am not sure what you mean by abusive dicipline with a wooden spoon. Is it because they are just using a spoon but may not leave marks over padding or is it in using a spoon, an implement that they are causing more damage because its an implement.
No, that's not the difference. The abuser holds beliefs which justify the abuse; and the non-abuser doesn't.
Yes but the question is why does the abuser feel a need to hold those beliefs while others don't. Your statement doesn't tell us anything when you say "The abuser holds beliefs which justify the abuse; and the non-abuser doesn't". Thats just about what the situation is. It doesn't tell use whether thats really the case and if the case why do some hold these beliefs while others don't.

Using your logic some people in the same situation where you say they are taught to hold these beliefs don't. The only destinguishing factor can be that its actually the makeup of the person that is inclined to be attracted to holding that belief. Their psyche has been primed to take on these negative beleifs.

As they are negative beliefs that also implies that something negative in the person is causing them to percieve the world that way to believe that control, violence and abuse is necessary and ok.
You've linked that claim multiple times, but it's still blatantly false. There is no such agreement between experts, as even a quick scan of the literature will tell you.
Then give me some evidence that agression is not linked. That links I keep repeating is repeated for a reason because its well supported. You say a quick search will bring up contradictory results and I disagree. You may find 1 or 2 in amongs 100s that support what I say. So once again your making the exception the rule.

Its also supported by basic psychological that agression is a negative feeling stemming from negative issues in a person and that people can over react and lose control of their behaviour for a number of behavioural issues besides abuse. Your actually going against basic psychology.

Once again your claim entire professions and professionals are blantatly false. Thats on top of earlier calling all child support professionals ignrant and not knowing what they were talking about. This is attacking the source and not the content, You need to explain why agression is not a major factor in abuse and violence.

Research has further found that parents with a history of abuse, especially those who physically abuse their children, have poor control over their aggressive impulses (Seng & Prinz, 2008).
Using the Behaviour Change Wheel (BCW) to Characterise Parenting Interventions to Prevent Intergenerational Child Abuse - International Journal on Child Maltreatment: Research, Policy and Practice


Espcially those who physically abuse have poor control over their agressive 'impulses' because agression has a physical influence on the body. So left unchecked it is likely to end in some form of agressive physical behaviour such as abuse or violent acts.

Controlling Parents Cannot Regulate Their Emotions. they are always on edge and their emotions are always close to boiling over. Controlling Parents Trauma.

Just like a boiling kettle will blow its lid so will a person with difficulties dealing with their negative feelings like agression. I don't know whay this is even controversial. Its well recognise when people say "they lost it" or "don't let your feelings (anger) get the better of you" or "pent up anger can explode" ect.

Conventionally, violence is understood to be often driven by negative emotions, such as anger or fear. What is the psychology behind violence and aggression? A new VCU lab aims to find out.

Conventionally, that means its the usual and main understanding by professionals and society.

Low levels of parental empathy have been associated with parental aggression towards one’s child.4 As child abuse is clearly a form of aggression, researchers have looked to existing models of aggression which highlight empathy as an important factor to understand the processes involved in abuse.

Furthermore, significant relationships were also found between emotional and physical abuse with aggression; higher levels of emotional and physical abuse were associated with a higher frequency of aggressive behaviors.

The above links come from the first page of a google search which included the National Institutes of Health and the NSW Government. The rest of the links mostly supported what I said. The ones that didn't were about something else related.
 
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stevevw

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It's not a small number. We know that parents who abuse mostly choose their abuse, in line with their beliefs and attitudes and values around parenting and discipline. They're not crossing a line because they're emotionally overwhelmed; they're not off their rocker. They are making deliberate parenting choices.
Then once again your need to explain why all the evidence states the opposite. I guess all these are also ignorant and don't know what they are talking about.

You have to explain this

Abusive parents have trouble managing their anger and can have angry outbursts that may feel like they come out of nowhere. 15 Signs of Abusive Parents

How can a parent make a deliberate choice about abusing their child when they feel like their angry outburst that led to the abusing has come from nowhere.

Child abuse is thought to be caused by a number of factors, including the parent’s problems with coping and self-control Walker, Gayann; Ensor, Jane --- "Understanding the victims of child abuse" [2014] PrecedentAULA 51; (2014) 124 Precedent 46

This is from Australasian Legal Information Institute (Austlii). This clearly says child abuse is associated with parents coping (emotionally overwwhelmed and irrational thinking) and self control. Thats exactly what I have been saying.

Although many parents believe in physical punishment as a means to an end, when they use it, they are typically stressed, frustrated, or angry with their child.
Why Do Parents Physically Punish their Children? 5 Useful Analogies from Sedimentary Rocks


This implies theres a difference between what the parent believes about the use of dicipline is different to what actually happens because they may be stressed, frustrated, or angry with their child. They were intending it as a means to an end but ended up crossing the line due to frustration, stress and anger.
But we are discussing corporal punishment. And many parents do believe in corporal punishment as discipline.
But what do you mean by CP. Like a planned and set out method where there may be a set place or method such as over the knee or a table and a smack on the bottom with a hand or implement like a spoon or paddle. If so no this is not how most parents who abuse dicipline their child.

Its often unplanned, irregular, unpredictable, reactionary and any hitting can be just about anywhere, on the legs, back, head. Or there is shaking, kicking, burning are forms of abusive dicipline. It seems rib fractures are common and as a childs body is fragile and developing any hits or blows to the torso are going to break ribs.

Physical abuse may include beating, shaking, burning, and biting. The threshold for defining corporal punishment as abuse is unclear. Rib fractures are found to be the most common finding associated with physical abuse.

Physical abuse is when a child's body has been hurt. Hitting hard with a hand or an object like a belt can leave bruises or cuts and cause pain. Shaking, pushing, choking, punching, painful grabbing, and kicking also can be physical abuse.

I think most child abuse is the result of the parents attempts to control the childs behaviour even if that means pushing a child against an object across the room where they break their ribs because the parent was upset with their behaviour. Its always about the childs behaviour with abusers, they cannot cope with their kids percieved bad behaviour when most of the time they really havn't done anything wrong.
Exactly. They hold beliefs and attitudes and values which allow them to believe that their abuse is appropriate and necessary. This is exactly what I have been saying.
No its saying the opposite. Its saying the parents intentions are good and they don't intend to harm their child. In other words their beliefs about dicipline is they don't intend to harm their child.

But as abusive parents are compromised by psychological distress they inevitably do in not being able to regulate their emotions thus doing something they never intended or believed doing.
That's a piece offering parenting advice, not evidence based in research.
Yes its evidenced based as the article states the research is coming from Lucie Cluver, Oxford University professor of Child and Family Social Work. She is the winner of: the University of Oxford Vice Chancellor’s Innovation and Engagement award 2022; the UK Research and Innovation International Impact Award 2021; UKRI Women in Science (2021); O2RB Excellence in Impact Award 2021; the European Union Horizon 2020 Impact Award. In 2019, she was recognised as one of UKRI’s 15 Women with Impact in Research.

Its not just about parenting advice which is relevant to abuse prevention anyway. But its giving advice about positive parenting in the context of also talking about negative parenting such as PA and their state of mind. If you check out Lucie Cluver other papers you will find she supports what I am saying.
And it conflates "shouting and hitting," but they are not at all the same thing.
Yes she is talking about no parents wants to shout or hit their child. Shouting and hitting often go hand in hand as it involves agressive feelings.
It's not even clear that this is discussing behaviour which would meet the definition of abuse, rather than just less-than-ideal parenting.
Theres a hint that its discussing physical abuse when they say "physical violence never helps" and “Parents don't want to hit their kids". It talks about how hitting causes harm for children. So it is talking about physical abuse.
 
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This is a non-sequitur. Because some among each group don't abuse that someone none abuse because they are compromised.
It means the "compromise" is not the reason. "Compromised" people will only abuse if they also hold beliefs which justify abuse.
Its also a false anaology because I have told you that there are destinct reasons why parents do and don't abuse.
Yes; the beliefs and attitudes they hold.
The people that don;t abuse amoung the compromised group don't abuse for good reasons and thats because they have some protective factors be it some emotional intelligence that gives them insight to not go on with the negative thinking usually because they have some support, a person or organisation in their life.
No; they don't abuse because they don't hold beliefs and attitudes which justify abuse. You can give a person who does hold those beliefs every support in the world and they will still abuse.
Saying people who are not compromised in some way yet will still abuse is a contradiction in terms.
Only if you reject the reality that some people of sound mind choose to abuse.
Now your using my earlier argues you were objecting to.
No; you were arguing that the harsher behaviours were not necessarily abuse. I am arguing that they are abuse, but that there is not necessarily a clear difference in the cognitive and affective capacity of the parents using those behaviours, than those who do not.
Your also creating a false anology with its use in this case.
What false analogy?
Like I said earlier you are right that there is not as much difference between 6 smacks and 10.
Except that ten is over the threshold for abuse.
But this would have to be a rational harm according to your logic and we could not say it was wrong because abuse is determined by subjective values.
We can make an argument for why it is wrong, even while recognising that all such arguments are based in subjective values.
But I don't know what your point is. Are you making a case that because abusers can somehow rationalise doing obvious damage that its OK, that its rational to do.
No. My point is that your whole argument that abusers abuse because they are so cognitively and emotionally compromised that they are being irrational is just wrong. It's a false explanation for abuse, and therefore an unsound starting point for prevention work.
Yes it does apart from the previously discussed "harder to determine' examples like you said whether 6 or 10 slaps constitutes abuse.
Well, those are exactly the cases with which we need to be concerned. If we want to build a culture in which abuse is not tolerated, we need to deal with those instances. Most abusers aren't breaking legs. For every broken limb there are thousands of kids dealing with bruises or punishment with an implement. That's where we need to be aiming our attention, and that will, by default, deal with the more severe end of abuse as well.
But we have gone through this a number of times and you keep repeating this fallacy that somehow these excepts that are harder to define are the rule when they are not and then base your whole arguement on the idea that because some examples are harder to determine all abuse must be harder to determine.
I'm not saying anything is difficult to determine. But I am saying that it is in this area that the majority of physical abuse is occurring, and needs to be dealt with.
... not some planned punishment as though the parrent is telling little Johnny to bend over the knee to get a smack.

Its more irratic than that...
Not in many, many households.
Lol no but weren't your previously arguing that n abuser can rationalise all sorts of damage as being ok to do. As though their thinking and beliefs were rational.
Yes. And I'd stand by that.
I am not sure what you mean by abusive dicipline with a wooden spoon. Is it because they are just using a spoon but may not leave marks over padding or is it in using a spoon, an implement that they are causing more damage because its an implement.
By definition, in Australian law, discipline with an implement is physical abuse.
Yes but the question is why does the abuser feel a need to hold those beliefs while others don't.
It's not necessarily about "need." It's about what they've been raised to believe is good and normal, what they've seen in their homes, in their community and society and culture, what they've heard in church (or other faith settings) and seen modelled. It's all the messages they've received about what is normal and ideal. All those messages about violence, about hierarchy, about rigid roles, about power and control, that tell them what good and decent parents and authority figures do.
It doesn't tell us anything when you say "The abuser holds beliefs which justify the abuse; and the non-abuser doesn't".
What it tells us is that focussing on all the other so-called causes is false.
Using your logic some people in the same situation where you say they are taught to hold these beliefs don't.
All of us will weigh our own experience and draw our own conclusions. Some of us even change our minds. But people don't come to hold these beliefs just due to some cognitive or affective deficit.
As they are negative beliefs...
Again, that's a subjective value judgement.
Then give me some evidence that agression is not linked.
Note: "Aggression does not always involve violence." "Violence is more likely to refer to an extreme form of aggression," which means there is aggression which is not expressed in violence. That resource does a nice job of disambiguating aggression, anger and violence.

Part of the problem, I think, is that some literature seems to use the word "aggression" when they mean violence.
(Eg: here: 9.1 Defining Aggression – Principles of Social Psychology – 1st International H5P Edition. where they define aggression as behavior that is intended to harm another individual).

But aggression is a psychological trait first, not a behaviour.
Its also supported by basic psychological that agression is a negative feeling
Again, a subjective value judgement. I prefer the APA's description of aggression as a "multidimensional phenomenon that may be parsed by cognition, affect, and behavior."
Once again your claim entire professions and professionals are blantatly false.
No; I claim your cherry-picked source is blatantly false.
You need to explain why agression is not a major factor in abuse and violence.
I'm not saying it's absent. But I'm saying abuse does not occur in an aggressive person who doesn't also hold beliefs which justify abuse.
I don't know whay this is even controversial.
Because it's a very poor explanation for the physical abuse of children. Many abusers just aren't in the sort of emotional state you're describing. But you ignore them.
Then once again your need to explain why all the evidence states the opposite.
It doesn't. I have previously given you sources saying exactly what I am saying.
How can a parent make a deliberate choice about abusing their child when they feel like their angry outburst that led to the abusing has come from nowhere.
Many abusers are not in that state. It's not an accurate picture of many abusive parents.
Although many parents believe in physical punishment as a means to an end, when they use it, they are typically stressed, frustrated, or angry with their child.
Why Do Parents Physically Punish their Children? 5 Useful Analogies from Sedimentary Rocks
That link backs up my claims:

"From a parental cognitive perspective, many parents use physical punishment because they think it works. Parents observe the child’s reaction in the short term—the child is upset and stops the behavior—so, they conclude it is an effective teaching tool. Parents also believe that the punishment promotes effective child socialization because it teaches the child what not to do."

"But at deeper levels, other factors are at play. Many parents originally base their views—either for or against physical punishment—on their own childhood experiences.

That view can be altered by a variety of influences, including:

  • views of normative disciplinary techniques,
  • stress,
  • socio-economic, ethnic or racial group,
  • religious beliefs,
  • parent education, or
  • advice from trusted sources, such as pediatricians.
Just as multiple processes help to form sedimentary rocks, these factors interact with each other. The influence of the different factors can be measured with surveys about parents’ attitudes toward physical punishment."

Parents might be stressed when they abuse, but they also hold beliefs and attitudes which justify their actions.
This implies theres a difference between what the parent believes about the use of dicipline is different to what actually happens because they may be stressed, frustrated, or angry with their child.
Or just because they're wrong.
They were intending it as a means to an end but ended up crossing the line due to frustration, stress and anger.
No, they cross the line because they believe it is right and good to do so.
But what do you mean by CP. Like a planned and set out method where there may be a set place or method such as over the knee or a table and a smack on the bottom with a hand or implement like a spoon or paddle. If so no this is not how most parents who abuse dicipline their child.
And your source for this is...? Because in my experience, this is far more common than the picture you're painting. The parent who uses a wooden spoon as a routine discipline method is far more common than the parent who "loses it" and breaks a bone.
No its saying the opposite. Its saying the parents intentions are good and they don't intend to harm their child. In other words their beliefs about dicipline is they don't intend to harm their child.
No, they don't intend to harm the child. They believe the abuse is appropriate and necessary.
Theres a hint that its discussing physical abuse when they say "physical violence never helps" and “Parents don't want to hit their kids".
But it is possible to hit without reaching the legal threshold to be defined as physical abuse. Given that that piece is offering parenting advice in situations which are not even clearly abusive, I'm not sure that piece is really relevant at all.
 
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It means the "compromise" is not the reason. "Compromised" people will only abuse if they also hold beliefs which justify abuse.
Its doesn't follow that compromised parents only abuse if they have a belief in abuse. Like I said the evidence shows that when compromised parents are taught to handle their feelings and irrational thinking they no longer abuse. Its addressing the reason they are compromised which stops them abusing.

You will have to explain why all the evidence shows that addressing the parents psychological problems actually stops them abusing. Whether they have belief or not its addressing the psychological dysfunction that prevents them abusing.
Yes; the beliefs and attitudes they hold.
No the evidence shows that the reason parents don't abuse is because they have protective factors in place. They either have emotional intelligence to not allow their feelings and thinking to over ride them or they have someone in their life who they can talk to and come to their senses.

If they have any beliefs or attitudes about abuse its because of their psychological profile where they have a need to believe such stuff. So its dealing with the psychological issues is what changes their thinking and beliefs.
No; they don't abuse because they don't hold beliefs and attitudes which justify abuse. You can give a person who does hold those beliefs every support in the world and they will still abuse.
I will do your trick, Evidence please. The simple fact they have support, and this gives them some insight into themselves is what dispels they irrational beliefs. People need to reason to believe such negative stuff.

They don;t just wake up one day and believe what they see and here. They are primed to believe it. So no amount of trying to convince them their belief is wrong. They will only see the irrationality when they look inside themselves to see their irrational thinking.
Only if you reject the reality that some people of sound mind choose to abuse.
But how can this be of sound mind when they are acting against their own natural instinct to care and protect their child. Its like going out to your car and smashing it up. Thats just plain crazy doing that to yourself or to a loved one especially if its the child you birthed into the world.

If any mother were to reject their baby and beat it they would immediate be referred to a psychologist. That is the case with all abusers, they are sent for psychological evalutation and therapy.
No; you were arguing that the harsher behaviours were not necessarily abuse.
Please show me where I was arguing that the harsher behaviours are not necessarily abuse. You have misunderstood what I said. Go and re read it. I said that the harsher punishments don't fall under the traditional understanding of abuse such as having a set method such as spanking that goes overboard.

But they are still abuse in every way. Why wouldn't kicking a child or breaking their ribs not be abuse. I have been arguing its abuse the entire threat.
I am arguing that they are abuse, but that there is not necessarily a clear difference in the cognitive and affective capacity of the parents using those behaviours, than those who do not.
Yes there is by the fact that the parents who use CP and don't abuse are in control of themselves. THis is self evident in that they are able to stop at the legal limit and not cross that line. But those who cross the line have little self control.

I gave you a dozen links supporting this. How about instead of making their unsupported claims and explain why the articles contradict you. Oh thats right you claims that all the experts are ignorant and don't know what they are talking about.
What false analogy?
I said theres a clear difference between 6 or 10 smacks and the more extreme examples like 6 smacks and broken ribs. You then used the same analogy between 6 and 10 slaps to argue that I am wrong. But you used the exact same anaology I was disputing which the the false anaology I refuted. Your just repeating the false anology because its about the more extreme differences that cannot be rationalised as ok.
Except that ten is over the threshold for abuse.
Yes but its only over slightly compared to broken ribs. Someone who goes over by 1 or 2 smacks which we can understand that its not so clear. But boken ribs is obvious and theres no way to rationalise that its ok or borderline ok or more obviously abuse then 1 smack over the limit.
We can make an argument for why it is wrong, even while recognising that all such arguments are based in subjective values.
What does that even mean. It doesn't change the fact that its obviously wrong. I don't mean wrong ethically but wrong as in the parents claim that it is good for their health and wellbeing is wrong scientifically. You keep using this logical fallacy of a false analogy.
No. My point is that your whole argument that abusers abuse because they are so cognitively and emotionally compromised that they are being irrational is just wrong. It's a false explanation for abuse, and therefore an unsound starting point for prevention work.
No its the basis for prevention and even your link stated this when it says that we must restructure the conditions abuse happens in and give therapy and financial support to parents who are having problems with childrens behaviour.
Well, those are exactly the cases with which we need to be concerned. If we want to build a culture in which abuse is not tolerated, we need to deal with those instances. Most abusers aren't breaking legs. For every broken limb there are thousands of kids dealing with bruises or punishment with an implement. That's where we need to be aiming our attention, and that will, by default, deal with the more severe end of abuse as well.
No this is false again. The majority of abuse does not happen with an implement. That may have ben the case years ago when traditional forms were more popular. But now its just hands on abuse, hitting all over the body, biting, pinching, grabbing viciously leaving bruises, burning, cracking ribs which is the majority of abuse. Parents don't plan out their methods they just react when their kids plays up.
I'm not saying anything is difficult to determine. But I am saying that it is in this area that the majority of physical abuse is occurring, and needs to be dealt with.
Not in many, many households.
Not in many, many households.
And I am saying this is false. I just gave you links that show that abuse happens a number of ways. The majority come from biting, kicking, strangling, throwing, pushing ect and not the traditional methods. Parents rarely stop and think.
I
Yes. And I'd stand by that.
How can it be rational when the evidence shows their thinking is in error. They may rationalise that breaking ribs is good for their wellbing and health but the science says this thinking is in error, its a cognitive error in thinking.

Just like if someone believes that eating rat poison is good for your health the science shows this is irrational as in reality rat poison is bad for your health.

If it was rational for the abuser to break ribs or burn a child then the abuser would have to come up with a rational arguement that is objectively true beyond their own thinking to prove that breaking ribs and burning kids is good for their health and wellbeing.
By definition, in Australian law, discipline with an implement is physical abuse.
Ok so just using an implement is abuse. BUt that doesn't answer the point which was that we can tell a clear difference between going slightly over the limit which or using an implement when using controlled CP is completely different to hitting all over the body around the head, kicking, strangling, throwing that cause much more damage is obvious and therefore cannot be rationalised in any coherent way.
It's not necessarily about "need." It's about what they've been raised to believe is good and normal, what they've seen in their homes, in their community and society and culture, what they've heard in church (or other faith settings) and seen modelled. It's all the messages they've received about what is normal and ideal. All those messages about violence, about hierarchy, about rigid roles, about power and control, that tell them what good and decent parents and authority figures do.
But using your own logic not all people who are subject to those messages and examples go on to abuse. This shows that those who do have some need within them that relates to those messages and examples, they have a mind filter that is selective of those negative messages and examples. As opposed to those who hear the messages and see the examples and don't take on that belief or attitude.

Thats because those who don't are not primed, they have emotional intelligence to see the thinking and beliefs as being negative and not the solution to life, to how to behave. So these beliefs don't resinate with them.
What it tells us is that focussing on all the other so-called causes is false.
No it tells us that they are real and factual because there has to be a reason within the person to take on those beliefs. Saying the cause if belief doesn't tell us why they believe.

Saying its because they have been shown that abuse is ok to do doesn't explain why most people hear the same message and don't choose to believe it. There has to be something in the person that attracts them to those beliefs and way of thinking. Its just simple logic.
All of us will weigh our own experience and draw our own conclusions. Some of us even change our minds. But people don't come to hold these beliefs just due to some cognitive or affective deficit.
Being able to change our minds is the result of our thinking, our emotional intelligence or not because we see the reasons why we should change our minds. We see the unreality and change our minds or don't go there in the first place.
Again, that's a subjective value judgement.
Why do you repeat logical fallacies when I have pointed them out. I explained that these negative feelings have a physical reaction so they are not subjective. Negative thinking and perceptions effect your health and positive ones are linked to good health. If negative feelings have a physical effect on bodies and in the real world then they are beyond subjective determinations and objectively real.

So abuse is associated with negative feelings like aggression, anxiety, unreal threat, depression, poor self esteem ect. Parents lose controll when negative emotions like aggression are allowed to fester or when their anxiety creates an unreal perception of threat and their fight response is warped so they physically lash out due to a lack of emotional regulation.

I keep repeating this and have linked the evidence but you still persist with this false claim.
Note: "Aggression does not always involve violence." "Violence is more likely to refer to an extreme form of aggression," which means there is aggression which is not expressed in violence. That resource does a nice job of disambiguating aggression, anger and violence.
But agression always involves causing physical harm which is exactly what physical abuse against a child is. Your own link supports my claim.
Aggression is generally considered a behaviour that is intended to cause physical or psychological harm to another person.

Violence is just the extreme end of aggression. But aggression itself is the negative feeling. Violence is just that negative feeling taken to ahigher level. It doesn't matter because my point was that abuse involves negative feelings like aggression and yourt links supports that.
Part of the problem, I think, is that some literature seems to use the word "aggression" when they mean violence.
(Eg: here: 9.1 Defining Aggression – Principles of Social Psychology – 1st International H5P Edition. where they define aggression as behavior that is intended to harm another individual).

But aggression is a psychological trait first, not a behaviour.
But behaviour is motivated by the psychologicalm trait or feeling. They cannot be seperated. That is what I have been saying with abusers that it takes a certain kind of person to want to control, abuse and be violent. Something in them motivates them to be this way.
Again, a subjective value judgement. I prefer the APA's description of aggression as a "multidimensional phenomenon that may be parsed by cognition, affect, and behavior."
OK I will rephrase this to be more specific. Negative aggression is linked to abuse and violence. The anger has turned into agression and the aggression has turned negative and into violence and abuse.
 
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Paidiske

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Its doesn't follow that compromised parents only abuse if they have a belief in abuse. Like I said the evidence shows that when compromised parents are taught to handle their feelings and irrational thinking they no longer abuse.
But you include the beliefs which justify abuse in "irrational thinking," so of course changing that is going to mean they no longer abuse.
You will have to explain why all the evidence shows that addressing the parents psychological problems actually stops them abusing. Whether they have belief or not its addressing the psychological dysfunction that prevents them abusing.

"most parents with mental illness are not abusive, and most abusive parents are not mentally ill (1)." (Emphasis mine). That paper also has a number of helpful critiques of the kind of position you've been putting forward.
No the evidence shows that the reason parents don't abuse is because they have protective factors in place. They either have emotional intelligence to not allow their feelings and thinking to over ride them or they have someone in their life who they can talk to and come to their senses.
No. That is not what the evidence shows. The parent who has beliefs which justify abuse can have every protective factor in the world, and they will still abuse.
I will do your trick, Evidence please.
Try this one: Social support and child maltreatment: a review of the evidence - PubMed

"Existing research is fraught with both conceptual and methodological problems. There is, at present, little research evidence that lack of social support plays a significant role in the etiology of physical abuse."
But how can this be of sound mind when they are acting against their own natural instinct to care and protect their child.
You are begging the question. Instead of looking at the evidence, you are assuming that someone who physically abuses their child is by definition, not of sound mind.
Please show me where I was arguing that the harsher behaviours are not necessarily abuse.
Were you not just saying that corporal punishment harsh enough to meet the legal definition (say, smacking more than six times), may be "harder to determine"?
Yes there is by the fact that the parents who use CP and don't abuse are in control of themselves. THis is self evident in that they are able to stop at the legal limit and not cross that line. But those who cross the line have little self control.
But this is my point. Someone who uses CP in an abusive way - hitting hard enough to bruise, or with an implement, or too many times - may still be in control of themselves. It's just that they don't know, or don't care, about the legal limit. There are many such parents. I have known many such parents. No amount of links in the world will convince me that they don't exist.
Yes but its only over slightly
Doesn't matter. Abuse is abuse.
Someone who goes over by 1 or 2 smacks which we can understand that its not so clear.
So; you are willing to concede that the parent who abuses in this way may not be irrational, out of control, overwhelmed? In which case you have conceded my point.
No its the basis for prevention
As someone who has been involved in primary prevention, no, it isn't. A primary prevention model would call this a dangerous myth.
No this is false again. The majority of abuse does not happen with an implement.
My point is that most abuse is not at the most physically extreme end. It is at the end you would consider "harder to determine," but still very real, and very harmful.
And I am saying this is false. I just gave you links that show that abuse happens a number of ways. The majority come from biting, kicking, strangling, throwing, pushing ect and not the traditional methods. Parents rarely stop and think.

"Corporal punishment is the most common form of violence experienced by children."
How can it be rational when the evidence shows their thinking is in error.
For the umpteenth time, you can be both rational and wrong. Perfectly rational people once believed the sun went round the earth, and went on believing that even when evidence to the contrary was discovered.
Ok so just using an implement is abuse. BUt that doesn't answer the point which was that we can tell a clear difference between going slightly over the limit which or using an implement when using controlled CP is completely different to hitting all over the body around the head, kicking, strangling, throwing that cause much more damage is obvious and therefore cannot be rationalised in any coherent way.
I don't agree that they're "completely different" at all. They're all forms of abuse. They're all harmful. The perpetrators offer the same justifications and reasoning for both. And whether or not it's controlled is completely beside the point.
But using your own logic not all people who are subject to those messages and examples go on to abuse. This shows that those who do have some need within them that relates to those messages and examples, they have a mind filter that is selective of those negative messages and examples.
It is by no means at all that simple.
No it tells us that they are real and factual because there has to be a reason within the person to take on those beliefs. Saying the cause if belief doesn't tell us why they believe.
No, but nor does attributing it all to being cognitively compromised. Why people believe what they do is a whole heap more complicated than that.
Why do you repeat logical fallacies when I have pointed them out.
Well, from my point of view, that's what you just did. You offered a subjective value judgement as if it were objective fact. I pointed that out and you repeated the claim. To say that something is "negative" is a value judgement.
I keep repeating this and have linked the evidence
And I have shown you the flaws in your evidence, so around we go again...
But agression always involves causing physical harm
No, it doesn't. Not at all. You can be aggressive without causing phsyical harm at all. Again, from my link: "Aggression does not always involve violence."
But behaviour is motivated by the psychologicalm trait or feeling.
Not in a straightforward way, though. I think, for example, of one lecturer I had. He knew he had an aggressive personality and actually told us, in his first lecture with us, that he had that streak in his personality, that he worked hard to only express it appropriately, and that he gave us permission to call him out if we felt he was being inappropriately aggressive. In his writing he could be savage with views with which he disagreed, but he tried to ensure that he did so in a way that was not harmful.

This paper does a nice job of unpacking positive and negative aspects of aggression: CONCEPT ANALYSIS: AGGRESSION.

It's not as simple as "people with high aggression are more likely to abuse."
Negative aggression is linked to abuse and violence. The anger has turned into agression and the aggression has turned negative and into violence and abuse.
Some abusers may be aggressive. But not all are. Because it's not emotions on their own that drive abuse, but beliefs and attitudes.
 
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stevevw

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No; I claim your cherry-picked source is blatantly false.
Which one, all of them. The problem with your claim is that cherry picking means that its usually a rare opinion thats out of step with the majority of evidence designed to undermine the majority. But my links are the majority so they cannot be cherry picked.
I'm not saying it's absent. But I'm saying abuse does not occur in an aggressive person who doesn't also hold beliefs which justify abuse.
Yes but you are singling out belief as though on its own it is the cause of abuse which is wrong. Like I said a person who has a handle on themselves and doesn't allow their negative emotions to go unchecked will not find the need to believe in such negative thinking and behaviour. Like I said abuse and violence is caused by a dance between feelings, thinking, beliefs and behaviour.

The negative feelings left unchecked effect the thinking and perceptions and cause them to be negative and distorted and this negativity and distorted thinking makes people open to take on negative beliefs like believing controlling and abusing others is ok. I
Because it's a very poor explanation for the physical abuse of children. Many abusers just aren't in the sort of emotional state you're describing. But you ignore them.
I ignore them because I disagree. Whether its more extreme compromise like completely losing it bodily and attacking a child or having some warped and regualted routine of abuse its the abusers cognitive error and emotional dysregulation which itself is the result of psychological disorder which is driving the abuse, driving them to believe in abuse.

Its self evident in that they display behaviour that is contradictory to what a normal and health and well adjusted human would do. Like I said the fact that they lack empathy is a sign of psychological disorder.

You say I keep ignoring your point but if you ignore my arguement why you are wrong then your going to keep repeating this mistake.
It doesn't. I have previously given you sources saying exactly what I am saying.
Not on this lot of links I have just posted. Yes you claimed in the last session you did but I disagreed that you did and were rather making fallacies. I cannot be bothered to go back.

But on this new lot since we started a new session you have not and I am ensuring I follow these up this time and going into the details so we can argue them out. But you have only linked one or two sources this time and one of them actually supported what I was saying.
Many abusers are not in that state. It's not an accurate picture of many abusive parents.
This is a good example of how you repeat the same unsupported claims but now I am following them up. Please provide evidence that abusers are not in 'that state'. I've figured your not going to listen and dismiss everything I say so I am now asking you to support what you say. Same thing but just the shoe is now on your foot lol.
That link backs up my claims:

"From a parental cognitive perspective, many parents use physical punishment because they think it works. Parents observe the child’s reaction in the short term—the child is upset and stops the behavior—so, they conclude it is an effective teaching tool. Parents also believe that the punishment promotes effective child socialization because it teaches the child what not to do."

"But at deeper levels, other factors are at play. Many parents originally base their views—either for or against physical punishment—on their own childhood experiences.

That view can be altered by a variety of influences, including:

  • views of normative disciplinary techniques,
  • stress,
  • socio-economic, ethnic or racial group,
  • religious beliefs,
  • parent education, or
  • advice from trusted sources, such as pediatricians.
Just as multiple processes help to form sedimentary rocks, these factors interact with each other. The influence of the different factors can be measured with surveys about parents’ attitudes toward physical punishment."

Parents might be stressed when they abuse, but they also hold beliefs and attitudes which justify their actions.
Lol its actually supporting what I have been saying all along which was that abuse is caused by multifaceted and level risk factors and its the combination of these that cause abuse. As opposed to your claim that abuse is only oir mainly caused by beliefs.

If you notice the article states besides norms it also includes stress which is associated with psychological distress and socio economics which you have been objecting to as even relevant let along contributory causes. The article doesn't make norms or beliefs any more prominant than stress or socioeconomics.

Even parent education supports my point as this implies parents lack knowledge, lack information to make informed decisions relating to abuse. They are more supceptible to believing in crazy ideas because they lack the information to expose them.

Even advice supports my point as not everyone believes the advice. If the pediatrition told the parent to snap their childs rib why would someone believe that is true and then do it to their kid. People don't just believe everything others tell them and then do it. It takes someone to see the warped sense and relate to that in the first place which points to the persons disposition, their psychological state.

Whats even more ironic is that your now using my links after saying they are cherry picked and don't know what they are talking about.
Or just because they're wrong.
What do you mean, the parents wrong or the articles wrong.
No, they cross the line because they believe it is right and good to do so.
Yes we have established that. But why do they believe that abusing their child is the right thing to do when it goes against every natural instinct such as matural or fatherly instinct and to empathise with their child. It would take a lot to over ride this. It would take some irrational thinking to over ride it. For them to do the opposite of what they were meant to do.
And your source for this is...? Because in my experience, this is far more common than the picture you're painting. The parent who uses a wooden spoon as a routine discipline method is far more common than the parent who "loses it" and breaks a bone.
I am not just talking about broken bones. I mean that the majority of abusing a child due to behaviour is not a set routine where they stop and then tell the child they have been naughty and then assume a set position to administer punishment like stopping and bending the child over the knee or a set place like bending over a table or bed or turning the child around to then administer punishment.

It is done on the spur of the moment where they will hit anywhere including the head, torso and break ribs or they will grab violently and shake the child or kick and push them into a wall or object thus physically harming them.
No, they don't intend to harm the child. They believe the abuse is appropriate and necessary.
But they don't believe in the harm that they end up doing. Their intentions is to smack and not do the damage they end up doing. That is what the articles I linked are saying.
But it is possible to hit without reaching the legal threshold to be defined as physical abuse.
Its possible but obviousl;y not for parents who don't have control. If the agressive impulse as the article said comes from nowhere how is it possible for them to even recognise this to not reach the point where they lose control. That thinking is not in their mind, they are detached from reality and driven by feelings insstead of thinking about what they are doing.
Given that that piece is offering parenting advice in situations which are not even clearly abusive, I'm not sure that piece is really relevant at all.
This is a good example of how the evidence stares you in the face and you still deny it. I just said the article referred to physical violence and hitting kids and your still denying its talking about PA.
 
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Which one, all of them.
The one that says "child abuse experts agree" when they absolutely don't.
Yes but you are singling out belief as though on its own it is the cause of abuse which is wrong.
It pretty much is the cause on its own. Absent those beliefs, people don't abuse.
Whether its more extreme compromise like completely losing it bodily and attacking a child or having some warped and regualted routine of abuse its the abusers cognitive error and emotional dysregulation which itself is the result of psychological disorder which is driving the abuse, driving them to believe in abuse.
There is simply no evidence that every single person who abuses a child has a psychological disordder, cognitive error, or emotional dysregulation. Remember the source I linked earlier; "most parents with mental illness are not abusive, and most abusive parents are not mentally ill (1)."
Its self evident in that they display behaviour that is contradictory to what a normal and health and well adjusted human would do.
Again, begging the question.
I cannot be bothered to go back.
That's entirely up to you. My points remain.
Please provide evidence that abusers are not in 'that state'.
Apart from the one I just gave you?
How about this rather good study on social norms which underpin physical abuse?


Note the comment "During child violence, disregarding extreme cases (and sometimes even including them) parent or the carer is convinced that the forceful influence over the child will yield a positive result in the end, prevent the child’s bad behavior from happening again, and bring the child closer to the “ideal” stage recognized by society."

(Emphasis mine. This goes to your point about even extreme forms of abuse being rationalised).
As opposed to your claim that abuse is only oir mainly caused by beliefs.
They highlight exactly the beliefs and attitudes I have been explaining cause abuse! You claimed that parents couldn't possibly believe that abuse was good or necessary, and here I find a source explaining exactly why parents believe that.
Even parent education supports my point as this implies parents lack knowledge, lack information to make informed decisions relating to abuse.
Well, yes, this is part of how we challenge the underlying beliefs. We show the harmful outcomes.
Whats even more ironic is that your now using my links after saying they are cherry picked and don't know what they are talking about.
I am perfectly happy to point out to you where your own sources support my position.
What do you mean, the parents wrong or the articles wrong.
The parents.
Yes we have established that.
Headdesk. After pages and pages of you arguing that they believed no such thing...
But why do they believe that abusing their child is the right thing to do when it goes against every natural instinct such as matural or fatherly instinct and to empathise with their child.
I'm not so sure our natural instincts are quite so straightforward.
I am not just talking about broken bones. I mean that the majority of abusing a child due to behaviour is not a set routine where they stop and then tell the child they have been naughty and then assume a set position to administer punishment like stopping and bending the child over the knee or a set place like bending over a table or bed or turning the child around to then administer punishment.

It is done on the spur of the moment where they will hit anywhere including the head, torso and break ribs or they will grab violently and shake the child or kick and push them into a wall or object thus physically harming them.
That's not what I find in the literature, which says that corporal punishment is the most common form of physical abuse, so what are you basing this on?
But they don't believe in the harm that they end up doing. Their intentions is to smack and not do the damage they end up doing. That is what the articles I linked are saying.
Yes, exactly. They don't recognise the harm, so they believe it is good and right to abuse.
Its possible but obviousl;y not for parents who don't have control.
Oh nonsense. A person could "lose it" and slap a child once, which wouldn't be classified as abuse.
This is a good example of how the evidence stares you in the face and you still deny it. I just said the article referred to physical violence and hitting kids and your still denying its talking about PA.
Because you can hit a child without it being physical abuse. And that sort of hitting - the one-off slap or the like - is far more likely to be where stressed and frazzled parents end up, than chronic severe abuse.
 
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But you include the beliefs which justify abuse in "irrational thinking," so of course changing that is going to mean they no longer abuse.
Yes I am saying that belief alone doesn't account for abuse because it takes someone who is primed to believe in abuse. So its the priming and not the belief that drives people to think and believe that way.

Once the priming factors like psychological distress and other conditions are addressed the priming disappears and they no longer have that need or inclination. Likewise you cannot just make a person change beliefs without addressing the underlying reasons they are primed to believe.

"most parents with mental illness are not abusive, and most abusive parents are not mentally ill (1)." (Emphasis mine). That paper also has a number of helpful critiques of the kind of position you've been putting forward.
This article is about mentally ill parents who were at the level of being inpatients in psychiatric facilities. This is different to psychological distress such as anxiety and depression and emotional dysregulation which is far more common in the community and these people are not in psychiatric facilities. So its another fallacy of false analogy.

So for mentally ill parents with psychiatric disorders which are more complex not all will abuse as parents. But Notice why it says
Despite a limited empirical literature, parental mental illness is often cited as a major risk factor for violence against children. However, mental illness that is adequately treated would not be expected to lead to increased violence risk.

So they are saying parents mental illness is usually a risk factor (which supports the Risk factor model by the way). But when treated they are not a risk. The treatment was the Protective factor which supports what I was saying about protective factors.

They were comparing treated and untreated parents with psychiatric disorders to see if parents who were treated abused less. And guess what they found when treated they abused less. Thats supports what I was saying that its not just about the belief itself and that its the underlying psychological distress or in this case the psychiatric disorder that needs treating which is causing them to believe and abuse to stop the abuse.

No. That is not what the evidence shows. The parent who has beliefs which justify abuse can have every protective factor in the world, and they will still abuse.
Then why didn't your link support for this unsupported claim. Your own link supported the fact that treating parents with mental illness stops them abusing. Stops them believing in those negative beliefs.
Try this one: Social support and child maltreatment: a review of the evidence - PubMed
"Existing research is fraught with both conceptual and methodological problems. There is, at present, little research evidence that lack of social support plays a significant role in the etiology of physical abuse."
Thats about social isolation compared to support as a protective factor. Its a bit hard to tell as its behind a paywall which begs the question how can you tell what its actually saying in context.

Nevertheless the ironic thing is you actually singled out isolation and lack of support as a risk factor. Your own links state that isolation is a risk factor and that providing support networks was part of abuse prevention.

If all you can give me is a pay walled link thyat we cannot read and is not backed by a number of independent sources thenn its pretty weak evidence.
You are begging the question. Instead of looking at the evidence, you are assuming that someone who physically abuses their child is by definition, not of sound mind.
Yes because its common sense. Thats unless you think believing in abusing a child and I mean the qualified line for abuse that is recognised and obvious like black eyes and cracked ribs is having a sound mind. Abusers lack empathy to inflict on others harm and lack of empathy is not of sound mind. In fact its extreme form is known as psychopathic. But even a mild form of lack of empathy denotes a problem in thinking, in recognising the suffering of others.

PS I am not assuming because I have looked at the evidence and I even linked it for you. Heres some more on empathy.

What is the link between parental empathy and child maltreatment?
Low levels of parental empathy have been associated with parental aggression towards one’s child.4 As child abuse is clearly a form of aggression, researchers have looked to existing models of aggression which highlight empathy as an important factor to understand the processes involved in abuse.

There are two mechanisms by which the presence of empathy curbs aggression: (1) a reduction in the level of distress and (2) empathic concern for the other person. The research notes that physically abusive parents have deficits in their perceptions, expectations, interpretations and evaluations of their child’s behaviour. Furthermore, parents who have high levels of personal distress, as is often the case with parents deemed ‘at risk’, often have information processing difficulties which makes perspectivetaking more difficult.5

High-risk mothers appear to be at an increased risk of using physical aggression due to high levels of personal distress when observing the suffering of their child. This is thought to be just enough distress to incite an aggressive response but not enough to facilitate perspective-taking. Indeed, the research notes that being subjected to another person’s distress incites emotions such as anxiety in high-risk parents, when compared to more positive feelings of warmth and compassion in low-risk parents, and leads to an egotistical reaction (such as aggression).


One more from a good source just to further support the point

Child abuse is thought to be caused by a number of factors, including the parent’s problems with coping and self-control, inadequate knowledge of child development resulting in unrealistic parental expectations, and poor ability to empathise with their child.
Walker, Gayann; Ensor, Jane --- "Understanding the victims of child abuse" [2014] PrecedentAULA 51; (2014) 124 Precedent 46
Were you not just saying that corporal punishment harsh enough to meet the legal definition (say, smacking more than six times), may be "harder to determine"?
Yes harder to determine between 6 smacks and 10 smacks as compared to 6 smacks and a split lip burns. Not harder to tell as abuse at all. The whole arguement was about me saying that abusers are thinking irrational because they believe that abusing their kids is good for their health and wellbeing when in fact in reality according to the science and facts its not. So they persist in an unrealistic thinking and beliefs.

You actually were the one who claimed it was hard to tell if an abusers beliefs and thinking were irrational. You used were saying 10 slaps can be considered rational to an abuser and saying its hard to tell to support your claim that abusers are rational.

I pointed out that theres a difference between 6 smacks and 10 and 6 smacks and breaking a kids ribs or burning them and that your logic would have to apply to this to make these more obvious abuses seem rational to believe in.

It doesn't so therefore so long as we can say that 10 smacks or a split lip or fractured ribs is abuse by definition according to the sciernce then any abuser who claims its ok to use these methods and cross that line are thinking irrational because they have no coherent rational for doing it.

I think I will leave it at that for this one as it took a lot of explaining and you may want to dispute this again. :sigh: lol. You keep changing goal posts and misrepresenting things that its pinning my head lol.
 
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Yes I am saying that belief alone doesn't account for abuse because it takes someone who is primed to believe in abuse.
Not relevant to the point I was making, however. But you have not demonstrated this, and it is at odds with all the research around things like social norms.
This article is about mentally ill parents who were at the level of being inpatients in psychiatric facilities.
Yes; but the relevant point is the comparison with a matched cohort who do not have mental illness, who are not "primed" in the way you claim, and yet still have many abusers amongst them.
So they are saying parents mental illness is usually a risk factor
Actually, they're saying it's often cited as a risk factor despite very poor evidence for the claim.
They were comparing treated and untreated parents with psychiatric disorders to see if parents who were treated abused less.
No; they were comparing treated parents with psychiatric disorders to the general population. And found the general population abused more, despite lacking the claimed risk factors.
Your own links state that isolation is a risk factor and that providing support networks was part of abuse prevention.
A part which rested on "Existing research... fraught with both conceptual and methodological problems. There is, at present, little research evidence that lack of social support plays a significant role in the etiology of physical abuse."
Yes because its common sense.
Common sense once thought scurvy was a communicable disease, too. After all, it seemed to spread between people in close quarters on board ship...
Thats unless you think believing in abusing a child and I mean the qualified line for abuse that is recognised and obvious like black eyes and cracked ribs is having a sound mind.
Did you read the link I gave you which said "During child violence, disregarding extreme cases (and sometimes even including them) parent or the carer is convinced that the forceful influence over the child will yield a positive result in the end, prevent the child’s bad behavior from happening again, and bring the child closer to the “ideal” stage recognized by society"?
You actually were the one who claimed it was hard to tell if an abusers beliefs and thinking were irrational.
No, I downright said they often aren't irrational.
I pointed out that theres a difference between 6 smacks and 10 and 6 smacks and breaking a kids ribs or burning them and that your logic would have to apply to this to make these more obvious abuses seem rational to believe in.
And it does, as in the UNICEF study I linked and quoted for you.
You keep changing goal posts and misrepresenting things that its pinning my head lol.
Not at all. My position is clear and consistent. But it still seems to me that at best, you are misunderstanding some of the sources you are using. Either way there does appear to be a comprehension problem somewhere in the discussion.
 
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But this is my point. Someone who uses CP in an abusive way - hitting hard enough to bruise, or with an implement, or too many times - may still be in control of themselves. It's just that they don't know, or don't care, about the legal limit. There are many such parents. I have known many such parents. No amount of links in the world will convince me that they don't exist.
But your own words point to what I am saying when you say they "hit too many times" or "hard enough to bruise" which implies they have gone too far even if they don't know the law. That they don't know or care to know is part of the loss of control. Like I said loos of control is not just the physical outburst. Its also the method of thinking or lack of perspective taking and emotional regulation that is being out of control of themselves.

So they are not thinking about the issue, not being concerned about the law and what is right because they are more concerned with themselves due to their skewed thinking and emotional regulation. Thats all part of losing control of ones life to end up abusing, or getting in trouble with the law, or substance abuse and other problem behaviour.
Doesn't matter. Abuse is abuse.
Lol this is getting funny now. You were just arguing that its harder to tell between 6 and 10 smacks to support your arguement that abusers are rational in their thinking. So now your supporting what I said that the abusers are thinking is irrationally because we can definitely say 10 smacks is abuse.

Theres a clear line that when crossed is abuse and anyone who thinks its rational to do is thinking in error and irrationally as far as the facts go that show 10 smacks is abuse because its deemed to much for its associated with the harm it causes determined by the facts of research and science.
So; you are willing to concede that the parent who abuses in this way may not be irrational, out of control, overwhelmed? In which case you have conceded my point.
I think I am in an alternative universe where up is down and down is up lol. Remember I said that your logic would have to apply to 10 smacks, a split lip, burns, and broken ribs as well to support the idea that abusers are thinking rational. Your now using the exception of a slight difference of 1 smack as the measure of the abusers rationality and generalising it. I am sure thats a logical fallacy as well.

My point was there was a good rational reason why an abuser may think 1 or 2 smacks over the limit is ok because its a tint step beyond the limit and an arguement could be made that the limit should be 7 or 8. But this is all rational and logic. We can reason out why a slight step over the limit is completely diufferent to the more obvious abuses like a split lip because theres no way anyone can rationalise that these more serious damage is ok. If they persist in believing then they are irrational. I must have explained this 10 times now.
As someone who has been involved in primary prevention, no, it isn't. A primary prevention model would call this a dangerous myth.
But your own links supported this lol. They speak about changing the beliefs and thinking so that people have more positive and rational beliefs about others, about not using abuse and violence. Not changing beliefs but changing structures and conditions in society and within abusers. By changing these things it changes the beliefs and attitudes.

If the abusers beliefs and thinking is not irrational and in error then why replace them with the so called "right ones" which are suppose to be the rational ones. And if the right beliefs and attitudes are not the rational ones then why promote those.
My point is that most abuse is not at the most physically extreme end. It is at the end you would consider "harder to determine," but still very real, and very harmful.
I would have thought we were just as concerned even more so about the more obvious abuses like split lips and black eyes or fractured ribs. The link actually said fractured ribs was the most common form of harm with child abuse.

The most common forms of child abuse involve skin lesions (such as bruises and burns) and bone fractures;

"Corporal punishment is the most common form of violence experienced by children."
I am not sure why you linked this. Its a questionaire to determine the awareness of pediatricians in Lebenon about CP and child abuse but it doesn't tell us anything about the breakdown of which types of abuse are most common. I mean it hightlights that "About 100 children die every year as victims of corporal punishment and many more suffer from disabilities". So that suggests a lot of the damage is resulting is actual disabilities.
For the umpteenth time, you can be both rational and wrong. Perfectly rational people once believed the sun went round the earth, and went on believing that even when evidence to the contrary was discovered.
But that doesn't make it rational to believe in reality. That is why I keep refuting this logical fallacy that you are using to measure a persons thinking as to whether its factual in the real world and not within the head of the abuser who maybe believing in fairies are real.

We have to have something objective to work out if the thinking is rational something outside each person, outside the abuser themselves to tell if their thinking really is rational. So just like we can now tell that anyone who believes the sun goes around the earth are in error in their thinking and anyone who persists like the Flat Earthers is deluded as we have the facts. They should no the facts as they are available. If they choose to ignore them then they are in denial and that is part of their delusion.

The same with child abuse. We now have the facts that split lips and burns or black eyes and even emotional abuse physically and psychological harm kids. Any abuser should know these facts if they want to claim they don't cause harm and are actually good for health and wellbeing.

But they don't think like that. They don'y look for the facts because they are fixated on some unreal belief primed into them that is not based in reality. So there is no way they can rationalise abuse is ok because there is no independent evidence they can use to justify what they claim. We can put them on the stand and shoot down all their claims with facts. If they still choose to believe then they truely are bonkers.
I don't agree that they're "completely different" at all. They're all forms of abuse. They're all harmful. The perpetrators offer the same justifications and reasoning for both. And whether or not it's controlled is completely beside the point.
But the perpetrator cannot offer the same logic and rationalisation for both. Its easier to rationalise 1 or 2 smacks over the limit than a split lip of fractured rib. They may rationalise they were not paying attention. But a fractured rib or split lip theres no rationalisation.
It is by no means at all that simple.
Thats right its more complex than just belief or single risk factors. Its a complex mix of cognition, feelings, subjective perceptions, experience and beliefs. No single factor is more dominant than the other and if there is any root cause its in the psyche of the person whose attenna is tuned to believe what they believe due to their experiences.
No, but nor does attributing it all to being cognitively compromised. Why people believe what they do is a whole heap more complicated than that.
Why people believe is due to their experiences. People need a reason to believe, to be attracted to that belief while others are not. That means its within the person, their experiences and the conditions they experience and how they absorb them, take them on which then influences their outlook. This then will determine their thinking and beliefs.

If you took a person who believed in democracy and freedom and you subjected them to properganda claiming the opposite there is no amount of convincing that person to take on that belief. The only way they may end up taking on that belief is when they are broken down, and they become weak and even then they still don't truely believe.

But if that person had bad experiences with democracy, perhaps was denied freedoms then they would be more primed to take on that belief.
Well, from my point of view, that's what you just did. You offered a subjective value judgement as if it were objective fact. I pointed that out and you repeated the claim. To say that something is "negative" is a value judgement.
But theres a big difference. I used factual evidence to support what I said. That agression has phsyiological effects on the body and behaviour and this is not a subjective determination. See the difference. You make subjective claims but don't have any factual evidence and I do. Thats the only way to tell the difference.
No, it doesn't. Not at all. You can be aggressive without causing phsyical harm at all. Again, from my link: "Aggression does not always involve violence."
But this does not negate my point that aggression is linked with abuse and it can be a negative emotion. Once again this is a logical fallacy that because some aggression is not associated with PA that aggression is not linked to PA and can turn negative. There is no positive aggression with abuse because the act of abuse is negative harm to others.

Your also misunderstanding your link. Your link is saying that aggression is considered an intention to cause physical harm to another. So the negative aggression itself is directly linked as the motivator for harming others. That may not be with violence but its still an aggresive act done towards another. Violence is just the extreme end of aggression.

So all negative aggression is associated with harming others physically. Its just that there are degrees of aggression where some harms are not as violently committed by are still an aggressive act.

I am going to reply to the last couple seperately as I will read your article you linked.
 
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Paidiske

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But your own words point to what I am saying when you say they "hit too many times" or "hard enough to bruise" which implies they have gone too far even if they don't know the law. That they don't know or care to know is part of the loss of control.
No, sorry, it's not. My point is simply that someone can be deliberate, rather than "out of control" in inflicting abuse.
Lol this is getting funny now. You were just arguing that its harder to tell between 6 and 10 smacks to support your arguement that abusers are rational in their thinking. So now your supporting what I said that the abusers are thinking is irrationally because we can definitely say 10 smacks is abuse.
No, I am not supporting what you are saying. I am saying that abusers are not necessarily any less rational than someone using non-abusive forms of punishment.
Theres a clear line that when crossed is abuse and anyone who thinks its rational to do is thinking in error and irrationally as far as the facts go that show 10 smacks is abuse because its deemed to much for its associated with the harm it causes determined by the facts of research and science.
And someone who doesn't know, or doesn't accept, that fact, is not therefore automatically irrational.
I must have explained this 10 times now.
You can explain it a thousand more, and it won't be any more convincing.
But your own links supported this lol. They speak about changing the beliefs and thinking so that people have more positive and rational beliefs about others, about not using abuse and violence.
Yes, because it's the beliefs and attitudes that matter.
Not changing beliefs but changing structures and conditions in society and within abusers. By changing these things it changes the beliefs and attitudes.
Well, yes, in order to change beliefs we are going to need to change social norms. But not in the way you've been arguing, because abuse isn't caused by distress giving rise to impaired cognitive and affective functioning.
If the abusers beliefs and thinking is not irrational and in error then why replace them with the so called "right ones" which are suppose to be the rational ones.
Because we are not concerned with irrationality, or error (again, not the same thing); we are only concerned with preventing long term harm. If it did no harm, people could be as irrational or erroneous as they liked, and it would be of no concern at all.
I would have thought we were just as concerned even more so about the more obvious abuses like split lips and black eyes or fractured ribs.
I am not, particularly, because I think that dealing with the more common, less severe abuse will impact on the more severe instances anyway. But if we focus only on the extreme and ignore the less extreme, far too much will go unrecognised and unchallenged.
The link actually said fractured ribs was the most common form of harm with child abuse.

The most common forms of child abuse involve skin lesions (such as bruises and burns) and bone fractures;
No it doesn't. It specifically lists rib fractures as "uncommon" in the table headed "Types of Fractures and Mechanisms of Injury." Your own quote talks about lesions, which include bruises, which are certainly caused by the kind of corporal punishment other sources agree is the most common form of physical abuse.
I am not sure why you linked this.
Because it said exactly what I've just repeated: "Corporal punishment is the most common form of violence experienced by children."

This is what we're dealing with. Deliberate corporal punishment.
Its a questionaire to determine the awareness of pediatricians in Lebenon about CP and child abuse but it doesn't tell us anything about the breakdown of which types of abuse are most common.
I literally quoted that bit for you.
That is why I keep refuting this logical fallacy that you are using to measure a persons thinking as to whether its factual in the real world and not within the head of the abuser who maybe believing in fairies are real.
It's got nothing to do with what's factual. Your claim is that abusive parents are so overwhelmed and distressed that they have lost their faculty of reason, and that's why they abuse. It's simply not true. And that's why I keep pushing back on all your claims about abusive parents being "irrational." It's just a completely incorrect model of what's going on.
But the perpetrator cannot offer the same logic and rationalisation for both.
They can, and they do. I have now quoted a source saying exactly that.
Thats right its more complex than just belief or single risk factors.
Not what I said. I said that we don't come to particular positions, to hold particular beliefs and attitudes, only out of psychological "need."
People need a reason to believe, to be attracted to that belief while others are not.
It's not that simple.

Take belief in hierarchy. There's a measure for that; it's called social dominance orientation. And it's been shown to be influenced by a bunch of factors, including group status and interactions, socialisation, temperament, and so on. What it is not determined by is simple psychological "need."
I used factual evidence to support what I said. That agression has phsyiological effects on the body and behaviour and this is not a subjective determination.
And yet I gave you a source which explained that aggression can be both positive and negative in its outcomes.
But this does not negate my point that aggression is linked with abuse and it can be a negative emotion.
Aggression isn't even an emotion.

Sure, some people who abuse are aggressive. This is no surprise; some people are aggressive, and we'd expect to see them amongst the abusive cohort. But some people who abuse aren't aggressive. It's not the aggression causing the abuse.
Your link is saying that aggression is considered an intention to cause physical harm to another.
And I pointed out that different sources seem to use the word "aggression" in different ways, but that I considered this an inaccurate use of the term. And I explained why, and I gave a source citing a much better definition.
 
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The one that says "child abuse experts agree" when they absolutely don't.
Ok most child experts agree. I linked some highly credible sources from health Authorities and Child Organisations as well as top Pediatritians who agreed. Are you saying they are wrong. Negative aggression is even recognised generally in Psychology including the DSM-5 that it can lead to uncontrollable behaviour.
It pretty much is the cause on its own. Absent those beliefs, people don't abuse.
But absent the priming conditions people would not believe such things.
There is simply no evidence that every single person who abuses a child has a psychological disordder, cognitive error, or emotional dysregulation.
Anxiety and depressive disorders are psychological disorders. Research shows that around 1/4 of all women suffer these disorders. Mothers suffer an even higher rate than women generally at around 48% and single mothers suffer psychological disoders the most at around 83%.

Add to this other possible risks like previous abuse, DV, substance abuse and ssevere stress like financial hardship, relationship and family breakdowns, trauma, isolation, poor housing, poor access and the psychological distress can be greater.

So as you can see psychological disorders are pretty common for the general public let alone parenting in todays society and the added risks factors for abuse. Its no a coincident that the highest rates of abuse and violence happens in families and communities that display all the above factors.

So yes considering that abuse is so often associated with anxiety and other everyday psychological disorders which are compounded by other risk factors as well as psychiatric disorders on top the majority of parents who aggress and use abuse and violence have some some sort of problem with cognitive and emotional dysfunction and even neurological and brain chemical issue.

Like I said just lacking empathy which abusers lack is a sign of a psychological problem with emotional regulation.
Remember the source I linked earlier; "most parents with mental illness are not abusive, and most abusive parents are not mentally ill (1)."
Yes and as I said you have misrepresented what it said. First this was about psychiatric patients and not people with everyday psychological problems. So though there may be parents psychiatric conditions they are only a small proportion to parents with psychological disorders. But taken together they make up a fair %.

Second if you notice it stated that the reason that parents with psychiatric conditions didn't abuse is because they were treated. The paper was arguing that parents with psychiatric issues can avoid abusing if they are treated.

So your paper is supporting what I am saying that mental illness and psychological disorders are a high risk for abuse and violence and when treated this reduced the risk regardless of belief. If you tried to change their beliefs only (which I doubt you could do anyway because they could not see rationally). But if you did and you did not address their psychological disorder then they will continue to be aggressive, violent and abusive.
Again, begging the question.
How is it begging the question when its a fact of human nature that a parent should be the protector and carer of their children and even evolutionary should protect to pass the genes on. Damaging their own child seems illogical in light of this. And its not as if we don't know in that we are all born to empathise with others so we can sense others pain and we know what its like and don't want that for ourselves.
Apart from the one I just gave you?
No that contains no such support about parents not suffering psychological and emotional problems and in fact it supported what I was saying.

Heres a question I think you will like. Do you think males are more aggressive and if so does that aggression make any difference to their tendency to be involved in more abuse and violence.
 
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stevevw

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How about this rather good study on social norms which underpin physical abuse?


Note the comment "During child violence, disregarding extreme cases (and sometimes even including them) parent or the carer is convinced that the forceful influence over the child will yield a positive result in the end, prevent the child’s bad behavior from happening again, and bring the child closer to the “ideal” stage recognized by society."

(Emphasis mine. This goes to your point about even extreme forms of abuse being rationalised).

They highlight exactly the beliefs and attitudes I have been explaining cause abuse! You claimed that parents couldn't possibly believe that abuse was good or necessary, and here I find a source explaining exactly why parents believe that.
Thanks it was an interesting read. But this doesn't refute that most abusers have psychological or emotional problems.

There is a couple of points or questions I had though.

I noticed it was about Georgia I think and they were using that as the example of how norms can influence a community. Especially when a bit isolated where old wives tales and outdated norms about raising kids can happen. But I think modern society is pretty well aware of more elgalitarian parenting and we are very kid sensitive almost to senitive. We have workshops and TV shows on how to parent so we have a pretty good understanding of positive ways to parent.

I think todays child abuse seems different where its not so much the traditional forms of abuse but any form of abuse. I am not sure why. I do think overall society is becoming more aggressive and violent as a way to oppose behaviours they don't like. That sets a bad example for everyone.

Untile we come to some common ground on how to behave topwards each other as a society I don't think we are going to convince many people to stop using abuse and violence. The following paragraph from your link summed this up for me.

Changing social expectations (empirical or normative expectations) – just influencing personal attitudes and normative and factual beliefs is not sufficient in order to initiate change of a social norm or establishment of a new one. It is not sufficient to convince the public that “violence is bad”, we also need to convince them that society (the reference group) believes the same (changing normative belief)
 
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