I don't know if this is the right forum because I'm new here but I'm feeling lost. I have been dealing with a lot of depression lately and doubting my future. I'm about to turn 37, I'm single, no kids, mediocre job (with a master's degree) that I don't love, I have gained over 150 pounds in the last few years, I have a lot of financial troubles, no siblings, and my extended family does nothing to support me. I'm a believer but lately I feel like God has forgotten about me. I have a few supportive friends but they're all moving on with their lives and I feel bad always counting on them to suppress my fears when they have more important things to deal with. I'm not very happy in my current life and I see none of it getting better. I always wanted to get married and have children but as I get older that doesn't seem like it's going to happen. Despite being 37, I have never been asked on a date. I feel like no one is going to want to date me, let alone marry me. I have told myself that if I don't feel happy in 3-5 years I might just kill myself. I can't believe that God would actually want me to do that but I don't see another way. I worry about being alone and not cared for. I don't want to live in a world where I talk to no one all day and have nothing to live for. I have seen in other posts that members mention living for Jesus, but I don't know if that's enough for me. Wouldn't he want me to be happy? I have been working on losing weight and have seen some difference. It's just not enough for me. I don't see myself being a better/happier person if I do lose the weight.
Beloved one, let us consider what we have heard:
“Therefore,
from now on, we regard no one according to the flesh. Even though we have known Christ according to the flesh, yet now we know Him thus no longer.”
II Corinthians 5:16 NKJV
Beloved one, we are not to regard ourselves according to the flesh but we are to regard ourselves according to the Spirit.
Beloved one, don’t take offense at what I have said. Beloved one, let us consider how we should REGARD ourselves, for we heard what apostle Paul also said:
Follow the pattern of the sound words that you have heard from me,
in the faith and love that are in Christ Jesus. -2 Timothy 1:13
Beloved one, let us regard ourselves according to the Spirit, that is, in the faith and love that are in Christ Jesus.
Beloved one, I was also depressed once, that I hated who I became then. Could anybody ever like me? Seriously then, I can’t even pray or sing ! I was then hopeless ! But my Lord is gracious, that He have compassion on me and rescue me.
I did have thoughts about the future but much brought me worry, sorrow, anxiety and fear. Now, I perceived and understood not conforming to the world and be transformed by renewing my mind, that our Lord meant for my good.
Beloved one, we should not concern ourselves or we should not regard ourselves according to the flesh but we should concern ourselves more to regard according to the Spirit.
Let us say age. There were much causes to bring griefs to Moses that he can’t deliver his people out of bondage of Egypt. Despite his political influence, as son of the daughter of Pharaoh, despite his wealth, despite his status, despite his education, despite his youthful strength, despite many things, that he could be concerned about. But with God, nothing is impossible!
Single ? John the Baptist we heard only that he was the only one born from Zechariah and Elizabeth. We have heard that he has not been married. Yet, this is what we have heard our Lord said about him:
““
Assuredly, I say to you, among those born of women there has not risen one greater than John the Baptist; but he who is least in the kingdom of heaven is greater than he.”
Matthew 11:11 NKJV
What a testimony that John the Baptist have !
No kids ? This is what we have heard our Lord said:
““Sing, O barren, You who have not borne! Break forth into singing, and cry aloud, You who have not labored with child! For more are the children of the desolate Than the children of the married woman,” says the Lord.”
Isaiah 54:1 NKJV
Beloved one, consider the Lord’s loving kindness, that He gives His strength the barren to sing, and promises them more children!
About jobs ? This is what we have heard:
“And God is able to make all grace abound toward you, that you, always having all sufficiency in all things, may have an abundance for every good work.”
II Corinthians 9:8 NKJV
Beloved one, let us consider that we may have abundance for every good work.
About weight?
For we heard:
“Dishonest scales are an abomination to the Lord, But a just weight is His delight.”
Proverbs 11:1 NKJV
Beloved one, our body weights are not the expressions of who we are ! Let us not be dishonest to ourselves about that. So what is a just weight ?
For we heard:
“For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, is working for us a far more exceeding and
eternal weight of glory, while we do not look at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen. For the things which are seen are temporary, but the things which are not seen are eternal.”
II Corinthians 4:17-18 NKJV
So our body weights are temporary not eternal. A just weight is weight of glory which are not seen are eternal.
Financial troubles ? This is what we have heard:
This poor man cried, and the LORD heard him and saved him out of all his troubles. -Psalms 34:6
Beloved one, let us cry to the Lord and believe that our Lord heard us and save us out of all our troubles.
You are right that extended family should provide support.
Beloved one, don’t put aside the love that your supportive friends have provided for you. For love cast out fear. Why you put aside the love and embrace the fear yourself and consider that your friends have more important things to deal with ? You get it wrong. Beloved one, put aside the fear and cast out that thoughts that “ your supportive friends have more important things to deal with.” For nothing is more important than love.
For we heard :
If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing. -1 Corinthians 13:3
So if we have love, we have everything.
Beloved one, don’t kill yourself. Honor those who have supported you and love you. Honor our Lord who loved you and gave Himself for you.
Beloved one, the concept “happy” you have to review again. Consider from the perspective of the One who loves you and gave Himself for you. Yes, the Lord Jesus Christ.
For we heard:
These things I have spoken to you, that my joy may be in you, and that your joy may be full. -John 15:11
Beloved one, let us consider these things the Lord have spoken to us, that the joy of the Lord be in us and that our joy be full.
Beloved one, let us be delighted to hear reminder. For we heard:
“Beloved, I now write to you this second epistle (in both of which I
stir up your pure minds by way of reminder),”
II Peter 3:1 NKJV
Beloved one, let us remind ourselves or stir up our minds by way of reminder, that we should regard ourselves according to the Spirit.
May God’s peace be multiplied to you in every way. To God the Father be thanksgiving through Christ. Amen.