Good forms of contraceptives? (Christians only)

[theoneandonlypencil]

**answers from married people are preferred*

Hey y'all,

I'm about to be married next month and thinking ahead of things I uh...I have a problem I'd like to figure out.

Basically, I was wondering if anyone could recommend good contraceptives that aren't blocking types like condoms/diaphragms? We'd like to wait until a few years have passed to have kids just to enjoy each other and get settled(especially since I plan on going through college first--and no, our 'passions' are definitely too strong for us to postpone being married for 4 years)and with our high...erm...libidos, I don't think abstinence will work for us.

I've read over most of the main ones; birth control I can only take if it has one kind of hormone in it instead of two so that it only prevents ovulation and doesn't keep any eggs from implanting(morning-after pills are not an option)...and I've looked into IUD/nuvaring/implanon, but the issue is ALL of them also have the hormone that has a low chance of keeping an egg from implanting. I'm very against abortion, so I'm not sure I could risk that with a clear conscious.

I guess I don't have too much of a problem with the condom or diaphragm, just that my fiance doesn't want plastic down keeping him from, you know, feeling stuff. And I don't want to be in the mood and already in the middle of foreplay when I suddenly have to stop and fidget with a diaphragm, because I heard they can be difficult to use and have to be fitted for you.

Are there any alternatives I'm missing? Also please don't say 'let go and let God' or anything like that--God knows that I know how biology works, and that there is a VERY good chance I will almost certainly get pregnant from making love with my husband protection-free at the frequency we're wanting to. It's not even a surprise with that in mind.

 

[ReesePiece23]

A Gujarati girlfriend showed me a special book once.

Literally 1000's of alternatives to full intercourse in there, and alternatives that are actually better and last longer.

It was more than a decade ago and I still remember it all. (I wasn't Christian then, so ease off lol)

 

[theoneandonlypencil]

A Gujarati girlfriend showed me a special book once.

Literally 1000's of alternatives to full intercourse in there, and alternatives that are actually better and last longer.

It was more than a decade ago and I still remember it all. (I wasn't Christian then, so ease off lol)

Oh man, I'd love to get my hands on that book LOL. If you remember the name of it, throw it my way!


Edit: Or if you feel comfortable, you can give me the gist on some of the 'alternatives' in PMs c:

 

[Paidiske]

I think it would be helpful for you to know not just how some contraceptives work, but how they work in your body. So, for example, I have an Implanon; in theory, that could work by preventing implantation, and that's it's mechanism of action in some women.

For most women, though, and certainly in my case, it very successfully suppresses ovulation and the cycle altogether (and I get very bad ovulation pain, so believe me, I know when it's happening!) So even though I am, like you, not keen on contraceptives which allow conception but not implantation, I'm very happy with how this one works in my case.

What I'm saying is that it might be worth trying something with that kind of mechanism of action now, before you're married, and seeing how it works in your body. If you're not confident it's suppressing ovulation altogether, you can stop using it; but if it is, then you have a good option.

 

[coffee4u]

All hormonal forms of birth control can cause a fertilized ovum not to implant. Only barrier and rhythm cycle methods do not cause early abortion.

The pill is supposed to stop ovulation but in case ovulation does occur, the pill's backup mechanism is to prevent the sperm from fertilizing the egg; finally, the backup to the backup is to make the uterine wall inhospitable (it thins the lining) so any accidental zygote that may have formed if the first two steps failed should not implant. So it does all 3 things. Even with all of that it still has a 4% failure rate.

Can Birth Control Use Cause an Abortion?

 

[Dave-W]

guess I don't have too much of a problem with the condom or diaphragm, just that my fiance doesn't want plastic down keeping him from, you know, feeling stuff.

we used the diaphragm early on, and it did not keep us from "feeling stuff" at all.

Pill type oral contraceptives can really mess up your body chemistry. Not everyone, but there are some that have problems with it. Talk to your doctor.

 

[theoneandonlypencil]

I think it would be helpful for you to know not just how some contraceptives work, but how they work in your body. So, for example, I have an Implanon; in theory, that could work by preventing implantation, and that's it's mechanism of action in some women.

For most women, though, and certainly in my case, it very successfully suppresses ovulation and the cycle altogether (and I get very bad ovulation pain, so believe me, I know when it's happening!) So even though I am, like you, not keen on contraceptives which allow conception but not implantation, I'm very happy with how this one works in my case.

What I'm saying is that it might be worth trying something with that kind of mechanism of action now, before you're married, and seeing how it works in your body. If you're not confident it's suppressing ovulation altogether, you can stop using it; but if it is, then you have a good option.

Ahh, I didn't know that was even a possibility. Though I'm not sure how well it'd work--my periods are highly irregular and it's hard to tell when exactly I've ovulated. That and I'm scared that it'll just like...not suppress it one day? And with my luck that'll be the day with a fertilized egg : (((

 

[theoneandonlypencil]

All hormonal forms of birth control can cause a fertilized ovum not to implant. Only barrier and rhythm cycle methods do not cause early abortion.

The pill is supposed to stop ovulation but in case ovulation does occur, the pill's backup mechanism is to prevent the sperm from fertilizing the egg; finally, the backup to the backup is to make the uterine wall inhospitable (it thins the lining) so any accidental zygote that may have formed if the first two steps failed should not implant. So it does all 3 things. Even with all of that it still has a 4% failure rate.

I already am not a fan of hormonal options, but you're incorrect about the first part. There are some oral forms of birth control that only have one hormone in them--the one responsible for suppressing ovulation. It does not thin the lining like the other double-hormone contraceptives but I appreciate the info!

 

[Dave-W]

A Gujarati girlfriend showed me a special book once.
Literally 1000's of alternatives to full intercourse in there, and alternatives that are actually better and last longer.

Oh man, I'd love to get my hands on that book LOL. If you remember the name of it, throw it my way!

Sounds like the Kama Sutra - an ancient India illustrated book on sexuality. It was originally written in Sanskrit, but has been translated into almost every modern language.

 

[theoneandonlypencil]

we used the diaphragm early on, and it did not keep us from "feeling stuff" at all.

Pill type oral contraceptives can really mess up your body chemistry. Not everyone, but there are some that have problems with it. Talk to your doctor.

Yeah, I don't really want to use anything with hormones if I can help it since I've read about the bad effects it can have. I was thinking about a copper IUD since it just kills the sperm and doesn't have hormones in it--but as far as I can tell, it still thins the lining which can keep an egg from implanting which makes me scared of the accidental-abortion scenario.

But I'll look further into the diaphragm.

 

[Dave-W]

Pencil - I would suggest you go the christian website themarriagebed [dot] com. (not allowed to directly link as they ask for donations) There is a very free discussion of all of this and the website owner Paul Byerly does a lot of research on contraception and other sex related issues.

Since you are engaged, you should be able to register. Tell Paul I said Hi.

 

[coffee4u]

There are also side effects I read over all the side effects and decided I didn't like the sound of it. I already take life long medication and the thought of more side effects was extremely off-putting. It was some years later I found out about step 3 which as a pro-life person wasn't acceptable to me. One plus with the cycle method is apart from using it in addition to a barrier method it helps you know your most fertile times which can help when you want to get pregnant.

 

[theoneandonlypencil]

There are also side effects I read over all the side effects and decided I didn't like the sound of it. I already take life long medication and the thought of more side effects was extremely off-putting. It was some years later I found out about step 3 which as a pro-life person wasn't acceptable to me. One plus with the cycle method is apart from using it in addition to a barrier method it helps you know your most fertile times which can help when you want to get pregnant.

Yeah, I'm pretty much saving oral contraceptives as a last-resort if nothing else is available LOL. And even then it'll have to be in moderation.

 

[theoneandonlypencil]

Pencil - I would suggest you go the christian website themarriagebed [dot] com. (not allowed to directly link as they ask for donations) There is a very free discussion of all of this and the website owner Paul Byerly does a lot of research on contraception and other sex related issues.

Since you are engaged, you should be able to register. Tell Paul I said Hi.

Thank you Dave! I'll go check that out c:

 

[Dave-W]

Thank you Dave! I'll go check that out c:

Great! Paul and Lori are great people and do a wonderful job there.

 

[Dave-W]

Oh man, I'd love to get my hands on that book LOL. If you remember the name of it, throw it my way!
Edit: Or if you feel comfortable, you can give me the gist on some of the 'alternatives' in PMs c:

BTW - we have a great sex book in our bibles - the Song of Solomon. Once you wade thru the ancient mideast poetic imagery, it has intercourse alternatives as well.

 

[Shane McKenzie]

**answers from married people are preferred*

Hey y'all,

I'm about to be married next month and thinking ahead of things I uh...I have a problem I'd like to figure out.

Basically, I was wondering if anyone could recommend good contraceptives that aren't blocking types like condoms/diaphragms? We'd like to wait until a few years have passed to have kids just to enjoy each other and get settled(especially since I plan on going through college first--and no, our 'passions' are definitely too strong for us to postpone being married for 4 years)and with our high...erm...libidos, I don't think abstinence will work for us.

I've read over most of the main ones; birth control I can only take if it has one kind of hormone in it instead of two so that it only prevents ovulation and doesn't keep any eggs from implanting(morning-after pills are not an option)...and I've looked into IUD/nuvaring/implanon, but the issue is ALL of them also have the hormone that has a low chance of keeping an egg from implanting. I'm very against abortion, so I'm not sure I could risk that with a clear conscious.

I guess I don't have too much of a problem with the condom or diaphragm, just that my fiance doesn't want plastic down keeping him from, you know, feeling stuff. And I don't want to be in the mood and already in the middle of foreplay when I suddenly have to stop and fidget with a diaphragm, because I heard they can be difficult to use and have to be fitted for you.

Are there any alternatives I'm missing? Also please don't say 'let go and let God' or anything like that--God knows that I know how biology works, and that there is a VERY good chance I will almost certainly get pregnant from making love with my husband protection-free at the frequency we're wanting to. It's not even a surprise with that in mind.

Get on the pill, just be aware that some pills don't actually prevent conception but rather embryonic implantation. More details: The Pill: Contraceptive or Abortifacient?

 

[boxman144]

**answers from married people are preferred*

Hey y'all,

I'm about to be married next month and thinking ahead of things I uh...I have a problem I'd like to figure out.

Basically, I was wondering if anyone could recommend good contraceptives that aren't blocking types like condoms/diaphragms? We'd like to wait until a few years have passed to have kids just to enjoy each other and get settled(especially since I plan on going through college first--and no, our 'passions' are definitely too strong for us to postpone being married for 4 years)and with our high...erm...libidos, I don't think abstinence will work for us.

I've read over most of the main ones; birth control I can only take if it has one kind of hormone in it instead of two so that it only prevents ovulation and doesn't keep any eggs from implanting(morning-after pills are not an option)...and I've looked into IUD/nuvaring/implanon, but the issue is ALL of them also have the hormone that has a low chance of keeping an egg from implanting. I'm very against abortion, so I'm not sure I could risk that with a clear conscious.

I guess I don't have too much of a problem with the condom or diaphragm, just that my fiance doesn't want plastic down keeping him from, you know, feeling stuff. And I don't want to be in the mood and already in the middle of foreplay when I suddenly have to stop and fidget with a diaphragm, because I heard they can be difficult to use and have to be fitted for you.

Are there any alternatives I'm missing? Also please don't say 'let go and let God' or anything like that--God knows that I know how biology works, and that there is a VERY good chance I will almost certainly get pregnant from making love with my husband protection-free at the frequency we're wanting to. It's not even a surprise with that in mind.

Hey, I have no idea what contraceptives to use as I have never had sex or am married, I'm just stopping by to say congratulations on your wedding! Hope the two of you can blossom together in a Godly marriage always lifting each other up. Praise Christ you found the one, have a good day/evening/night

 

[Sketcher]

Certain kinds of contraceptives can be used in combination with each other as well (i.e. diaphragm + spermicide). Certain types of materials for condoms or diaphragms, and certain kinds of spermicides do cause allergic reactions in some people, so if that happens to you or your husband-to-be, know that there are other kinds in the same category that may not trigger that reaction.

 

[bèlla]

I posed a similar question a couple of years ago. I wanted natural methods that weren’t invasive and didn’t require hormones. They mentioned fertility trackers and that is the direction I would take. There are several models available (like Mira).

~Bella