Is dating non-Christians bad idea?

[JohnB445]

I thought maybe they with the help of me find Jesus later on. But I don't know.

I've dated non-Christians in the past when I use to be a agnostic and the relationships didn't last, but this was high school.

Will going back into dating be a good thing while I am in college? Or should I focus more on school and just keep people as friends?

One of my friends got too caught up with his girlfriend and he ended up doing bad in school. I just don't want to mess up.

 

[Radagast]

Is dating non-Christians bad idea?

A very bad idea. The Bible tells us not to do it.

I thought maybe they with the help of me find Jesus later on.

That's what people often hope for, but it usually doesn't happen that way.

 

[PloverWing]

In general, don't date people with the idea of trying to change something important about them. In particular, don't go into a dating relationship expecting to change the person's religion. If you're going to date a Hindu or Muslim or atheist, then be content with the fact that they're Hindu/Muslim/atheist, and be respectful of (even curious about) their religious beliefs. If you can't do that, then don't date them; it'll be a constant point of friction between you.

Also keep in mind that interfaith marriages are difficult. Not impossible, but difficult. You'll have to work out whether to baptize the children, what religious beliefs you'll teach your children, how you'll celebrate holidays, and so on. If you're in a relationship that looks like it might be long-lasting, start thinking and talking about these things.

 

[StrivingFollower]

Think about the parable about the seeds being planted. It's hard to tell who has the potential to be a Christian, there are so many factors involved. Many stories in the Bible show people falling into bad decisions because they got with a girl that drew them into more and more sin. Don't invite temptation into your life.

I had a girlfriend who was a casual Christian, and I could never talk about religion with her. She hated talking about it. I became less and less Christian being with her. It was a very nice relationship in its other sides, but it was so bad for my spirituality.

 

[Sketcher]

Don't date unbelievers. If you do, you might marry one, and if you marry one, you're unequally yoked. What that means is she doesn't have Christian values while you do, and she doesn't have the Holy Spirit while you do. And when raising kids, all the spirituality of value has to come from you. It is much better for both husband and wife to be committed believers who can reinforce each other spiritually, and who can act truly as a team when providing spiritual direction to their children.

All that said, you are 100% allowed to date in college, and that is probably one of the easier times in life to meet people to date.

 

[Joined2krist]

I think you should make lots of friends in college and you can get serious when you're thinking about getting married. Please if you can help it, date a Christian

 

[Albion]

My feeling about this is that dating a non-believer (as opposed to someone who was raised without religion and is open to your guidance in the matter) is risky. It could work out, but the chances are that it will not.

As for serious dating, yes, it could distract you from your studies, but if the heart calls, just resolve not to let it damage your studies. Many people are able to do both successfully, so this depends on you.

 

[Andrew77]

I thought maybe they with the help of me find Jesus later on. But I don't know.

I've dated non-Christians in the past when I use to be a agnostic and the relationships didn't last, but this was high school.

Will going back into dating be a good thing while I am in college? Or should I focus more on school and just keep people as friends?

One of my friends got too caught up with his girlfriend and he ended up doing bad in school. I just don't want to mess up.

Couple of different answers.

First, should a Christian date a non-Christian?

The answer is *never*.

A Christian man should never date a pagan woman. There is no positive thing in the Bible about that, and tons on tons on tons, of very negative examples. Do not date pagan women.

Second, should you date?

The answer is, if you want to be married, you should date and find a wife. If you do not want to be married, then you have no business dating.

It's not anymore simple or complex than this. If you want to be married, yes date and find a wife. If you do not want to be married, then no you should not date at all.

Third, should you date in college?

Again.... do you want to be married? Yes, then date, find a wife, and get married.

Now let me clarify, do not date if you intend to get married in 5 years. By get married, I mean now. Not in a decade. This idea that you are going to date in college, and wait 5 years to get married rarely works.

What ends up happening is that you end up sleeping with a woman you are not married to, which is sin. Then you feel guilty, or she feels guilty, or both feel guilty and you end up destroying the relationship.

Don't do that. Date if you intend to marry... NOW.

Forth, should you get married in college?

A bunch of people are going to tell you no. I think they are crazy. The solution in the Bible for sexual desire is marriage. People who delay that for long periods of time, end up in fornication and pornography, and sin.

Don't do that. Better to be married, than to burn in lust.

And the fact is, married men do better in school, and do better in their careers.

So I'm all for you getting married.

But if you do not intend to get married, then don't date. Stay away from women.

 

[thecolorsblend]

I thought maybe they with the help of me find Jesus later on. But I don't know.

I've dated non-Christians in the past when I use to be a agnostic and the relationships didn't last, but this was high school.

Will going back into dating be a good thing while I am in college? Or should I focus more on school and just keep people as friends?

One of my friends got too caught up with his girlfriend and he ended up doing bad in school. I just don't want to mess up.

Be not unequally yoked. If you serve the Lord and they don't... that's not good.

I would add, though, that the "unequally yoked" thing can extend pretty far.

But in the main, I don't see anything positive coming from dating non-Christians. Obviously there are wonderful people out there who don't believe. But that doesn't make them good candidates for your affections.

Good luck!

 

[mourningdove~]

Is dating non-Christians bad idea?

Yes, it is a bad idea ...
you might "fall in love" with your date!

Though the Bible tells us not to be "unequally yoked", if in love ... you will have a hard time obeying this command.

They are reasons we are told to not be unequally yoked ... very 'valid' reasons, that sometimes do not become apparent until after an unequally yoked couple is married ...

There can be much sadness in a marriage,
when one is seeking to follow the Lord and the other is not.

There can be strife, there can be much loneliness.

And divorce can be a very painful thing, I'm told ...