- Dec 12, 2018
- 3
- 2
- 38
- Country
- United States
- Faith
- Christian
- Marital Status
- Married
I’m concerned about what really occurred with my wife’s former employer and boss (a doctor). She says she hated working there and that her boss was always inappropriate—supposedly she couldn’t wait to get out of there. I believed her however I recently found at least 10 emails of him expressing his love for her. Some of them I could see where she only gave short responses but nothing I considered inappropriate. I was never made aware of them at the time but only found them several years later. Several things really concern me. The fact that she never tried to tell him to stop but continued the dialogue which leads to me believe she wanted the attention. There is a clear sense of dialogue in the emails from him, so I think she could have just deleted her replies. The fact that she never told me about the emails. One of the things she told me was that he physically assaulted her (grabbing her between the legs) in the office but never wanted to pursue it. I was extremely angry about the assault and that she did not want to take legal action. I wanted to go to the office to confront him but she wouldn’t allow it because she didn’t want to lose her job. We were younger and still kind of living paycheck to paycheck, so I trusted her when she said she’s dealt with it. It’s always left me feeling angry with myself for never confronting the a-hole.
On several occasions through our 10-year marriage, she’s made the comment that “you should never put anything into writing that you don’t want someone else to know.” Pretty obvious and harmless advise. Unfortunately, I’m left with this nagging thought that maybe she’s just really great at covering her tracks. I am considering if asking one of her former coworkers if she had any insights. I’d met this coworker on several occasions and she seemed to be aware of the doctors inappropriate behavior and that I had nothing to worry about. The coworker was a single mom in her late 40’s and she was an extremely kind women so I don’t think she would lie.
I’m really not sure what to do. Looking back I’m not sure if I was rationalizing all of it and putting to much faith in her and our young marriage, or was I just being a complacent fool. I’d really appreciate any advice on what I should do. I wanted to keep my post as short as possible without getting into the weeds, but I have plenty of other details if it helps paints a clearer picture. My wife is a lovely person that is extremely kind to everyone, but by no means does she have an innocent past either.
On several occasions through our 10-year marriage, she’s made the comment that “you should never put anything into writing that you don’t want someone else to know.” Pretty obvious and harmless advise. Unfortunately, I’m left with this nagging thought that maybe she’s just really great at covering her tracks. I am considering if asking one of her former coworkers if she had any insights. I’d met this coworker on several occasions and she seemed to be aware of the doctors inappropriate behavior and that I had nothing to worry about. The coworker was a single mom in her late 40’s and she was an extremely kind women so I don’t think she would lie.
I’m really not sure what to do. Looking back I’m not sure if I was rationalizing all of it and putting to much faith in her and our young marriage, or was I just being a complacent fool. I’d really appreciate any advice on what I should do. I wanted to keep my post as short as possible without getting into the weeds, but I have plenty of other details if it helps paints a clearer picture. My wife is a lovely person that is extremely kind to everyone, but by no means does she have an innocent past either.
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