Ignorance: lack of knowledge or information.
"he acted in ignorance of basic procedures"
synonyms: incomprehension of, unawareness of, unconsciousness of, unfamiliarity with, inexperience with, lack of knowledge about, lack of information about.
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Ignorance is not a bad word, so I wanted to make sure I posted the definition before I used the term to describe even the basics of your understanding of the Bible.
It's not that I find your story to be untrue. (You said "I'm sorry you do not accept my story") so this too shows me that we have a misunderstanding.. I truly believe what you said-- what I was getting at is that being around Christians, being raised by Christians, growing up in a church and going to every youth group, and every Wednesday night does not make one a Christian.
"Ye must be born again"
But before I get to that part--I want to explain why I said you were ignorant on a couple of things in the Bible.
And this is ONLY because (I believe) you are not truly born-again and never have experienced God in a real personal way. In other words, God has always been "up there" somewhere. You do not get Christianity by osmosis. But first let's discuss the slavery issue that you bring up--which also is not your true objection. How can I say this? Because I've been preaching and ministering to atheists specifically, even before there was an internet.
I know precisely what your problem is, and precisely how to fix it--if I was a surgeon I would have already diagnosed you and given you a specific plan for your choices--which would probably consist of surgery or, if you refuse, then sending you to a hospice where they can comfort you until you slowly pass away. Because your sickness is deadly. (But the Good News is it is completely curable).
We all had the same disease you did--and I will also share with you my testimony soon. You may not be able to relate to my testimony since you grew up in the church, and I was out there on the streets sharing dirty needles and smoking crack--but to show that no matter how "good" or "bad" we feel we have been, we both had the same terminal illness, and Thank God, the procedure for the cure is the same for all of us.
Now: You mentioned slavery in the Bible, and this part really bothers me:
Through the years, I have been in contact with non-believers, whom brought up many topics. I read them in context, and was not able to justify them without 'spinning' many definitions. I later found this was being dishonest with myself. I started to study the origin of the Bible, from both believer and non-believer sites.
It seems you couldn't be bothered to read the boring old Bible, but when your unsaved friends handed you stuff, you read it in context. This is how you began to unravel. The Devil is not content with anyone sitting on the fence. God even says "I could wish you were either hot or cold, but because you are lukewarm, I will spew you out of my mouth." Because if you are hot for the Gospel, then great, and if you are cold, then great---some of the biggest baddest biker dudes in jail are the ones that are closest to getting radically saved and set free. But if you don't think you have a problem--it's like the doctor is telling you that you are sick, but you say "But I don't feel sick" many people who have a brain tumor may not even know about it--but it is there none-the-less, growing like a time-bomb.
Because of your spiritual condition, when someone presents what appears to be a Bible difficulty or contradiction, it may sound like "Hey yeah, what about that?"
The slavery one is an easy one to reconcile, and we could go through a list of over 100 supposed Bible difficulties that I've heard over the years-- but why am I still a Christian? Because I hear with spiritual ears, and I cannot deny that I have been radically saved.
I will suffer a few of these, but I will be honest with you since you said you will be honest with us-- I will not sit here and listen to "Well what about this?" and then after answering that one "Well what about what my other friend pointed out in Genesis 18?" etc... When the real problem is that these are not your true objections.
In the Biblical passages talking about slaveowners are to be kind to their slaves-- you have to understand, though slavery in the United States may be a sticking point with you--as it is with me, as I find it personally disgusting. The thought of selling another human and then the idea that killing and raping these people was somehow legal because they were property makes me want to cry--in real life. Break down and cry that this is our history in the United States.
But with the Israelites, what they had was called the same thing "Slavery" but it was vastly different. First of all, it was voluntary! Yes, that's true, it was voluntary--if you could not pay your debts, you could work it out with the person that you owed and say, I will be your slave and work off the money I owe you--but while this is happening, you would house me, and feed me while I was working.. But the great part about this sort of slavery was that it kept you out of jail--back then, if you could not pay your debts you could actually go to prison. We do not do this to people now days.. we let them file bankruptcy and they have bad credit for 7 years. Why 7 years? I believe this is spiritual--because there used to be something in the Israelites day where all debts were cancelled every 7 years. Carefully study Deuteronomy 15 and tell me if this sounds like the type of disgusting slavery we are guilty of in our US History:
Deut 15:1-5
"15 “At the end of every seven years you shall grant a release of debts. 2 And this is the form of the release: Every creditor who has lent anything to his neighbor shall release it; he shall not require it of his neighbor or his brother, because it is called the Lord’s release. 3 Of a foreigner you may require it; but you shall give up your claim to what is owed by your brother, 4 except when there may be no poor among you; for the Lord will greatly bless you in the land which the Lord your God is giving you to possess as an inheritance— 5 only if you carefully obey the voice of the Lord your God, to observe with care all these commandments which I command you today."
Now a few verses later we hear an even more specific way to deal with slaves:
Deut 15:12-18
"12 “If your brother, a Hebrew man, or a Hebrew woman, is sold to you and serves you six years,
then in the seventh year you shall let him go free from you. 13 And when you send him away free from you, you shall not let him go away empty-handed; 14 you shall supply him liberally from your flock, from your threshing floor, and from your winepress. From what the Lord your God has blessed you with, you shall give to him. 15 You shall remember that you were a slave in the land of Egypt, and the Lord your God redeemed you; therefore I command you this thing today. 16 And if it happens that he says to you, ‘I will not go away from you,’ because he loves you and your house, since he prospers with you, 17 then you shall take an awl and thrust it through his ear to the door, and he shall be your servant forever. Also to your female servant you shall do likewise. 18 It shall not seem hard to you when you send him away free from you; for he has been worth a double hired servant in serving you six years. Then the Lord your God will bless you in all that you do."
Look at that! Some slaves, even after they were freed, may choose to stay if they liked serving for their master.
God knows (in vs 18) it may seem hard to send your slave away free in the 7th year, because he has been free help, but when you do so with a cheerful heart, the Lord will bless you in all that you do.
This is nothing like US slavery.
You could decide to go to jail instead and say to yourself "I will not work off my debt, I will go to jail and be fed 3 times a day and lay on my cot for 7 years until I am freed." but there was more honor and even perhaps more liberty for those that chose to work off their debts--afterall, a debt is a debt.
And God is wise and knew that some people that are owed large sums of money may get an evil thought in their heart about the person that owes them a lot of money, and yet the 7th year is upon us-- perhaps he will only have to be my slave for 6 months and be set free-- how fair is that?
And the Lord even provides for this situation in Deut 15 vs. 9:
" 9 Beware lest there be a wicked thought in your heart, saying,
‘The seventh year, the year of release, is at hand,’ and your eye be evil against your poor brother and you give him nothing, and he cry out to the Lord against you, and it become sin among you. 10 You shall surely give to him, and your heart should not be grieved when you give to him,
because for this thing the Lord your God will bless you in all your works and in all to which you put your hand. 11 For the poor will never cease from the land; therefore I command you, saying, ‘You shall open your hand wide to your brother, to your poor and your needy, in your land.’"
So let us no longer trifle with trivial matters about miscarried children going to heaven or slavery in the Bible (which is nothing at all like the disgusting slavery we are guilty of in our history of the United States).
Let us be about what the true nature of your issue is-- the need for salvation.
You said "Let me be honest with you"
Now let me say: "Let me be blunt with you."
I hope you are not offended by my bluntness--but I have led many to the Lord--not as a boast---because no man can save another man--one plants a seed, another waters, but God gives the increase. Only Jesus Christ can save your soul from hell.
Note: This post was too long so this will be part 1 of 2