How can I know I am saved

[Helga1027]

When my husband argues with me, he often says things like you are not saved, you're an angel of light, demonic agent, etc...

He even said he was praying Saturday night and knows why the Lord spoke certain things to him. He said numerous times that he wanted me to lead prayer meeting but the Lord told him no.

I am tired. He has been verbally abusive for the years we've been married and a bit physically by threatening to punch me in the face a few times and grabbing my sweater at the neck with his fist in my fave. I now am having difficulty not responding in kind back to him.

The only thing I could hold on to was the Lord during this time . That the Lord was with me. The reason I stay is because of the Lord.

Is my husband right about me?

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[Poppyseed78]

Your relationship with Christ is between you and Christ. Although (ideally) our spouses should be encouraging us in our walk with God, this doesn't always happen. If your husband is abusive toward you, I wouldn't take anything he says as truth. Abusive people tend to manipulate and spin things in order to gain control, so he is likely trying to make you feel like you are weak.

Have you discussed this with a pastor or another person from your church? Prayer can help you gain some perspective about your marriage, as well as your own salvation. I think there are two separate issues here - your question of how you can know you are saved, and the manipulation/abuse in your marriage. If you fully believe John 3:16, have declared Jesus as your Lord and Savior and devoted your Life to worshipping Him, then you are saved by His grace covering all your sin. While that is a very basic understanding of salvation, if you have done that - as well as asking God for forgiveness - then you are saved. Obviously our walk with God is a lifelong journey, and we always have more to learn, and we always fall short. But I do not think it is someone else's place, even a spouse, to tell us that we are not saved.

 

[wayfaring man]

We can have assurance of salvation even now. Through experiencing things like Christ's love in our heart, the ability to forgive others, a genuine desire, that won't go away, to live soberly, righteously, and godly.

Yet the final confirmation of salvation, which we await, is given when this mortality is given immortality in God's Kingdom of everlasting Joy and Peace in His Righteousness.

We are warned that many who assume they are 'saved' will be rejected by The Lord.(See Matthew 7:21-23)

Based on your description it sounds as if your husband is overreacting and overstating things. If you are showing symptoms of being backslidden etc., there should be an effort to restore your spiritual status in the spirit of love. But it may be that he too is feeling overwhelmed, and is not stable enough spiritually to handle this matter well, so in frustration he lashes out....sounds like there's a need for a mature third party to mediate matters - if both of you can agree to it.

We seldom get better by looking at how another is failing to do their part.

But if we examine ourselves to see where we need to change... with The Lord's help - we can be transformed.

May The Lord Be Pleased to Bless & Keep.

 

[John Hyperspace]

When my husband argues with me, he often says things like you are not saved, you're an angel of light, demonic agent, etc...

Awful!

He even said he was praying Saturday night and knows why the Lord spoke certain things to him. He said numerous times that he wanted me to lead prayer meeting but the Lord told him no.

I am tired. He has been verbally abusive for the years we've been married and a bit physically by threatening to punch me in the face a few times and grabbing my sweater at the neck with his fist in my fave. I now am having difficulty not responding in kind back to him.

The only thing I could hold on to was the Lord during this time . That the Lord was with me. The reason I stay is because of the Lord.

Is my husband right about me?

Here is how you know: 1 John 3:14.

This is the new commandment from Jesus: John 13:34, John 15:12 and so 2 John 1:5 and 1 Peter 1:22, 1 Peter 3:8, 1 John 3:17, 1 John 4:20-21, James 2:8, Galatians 5:14, Romans 13:8, Romans 13:10, etc etc

1Co 13:13 So now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love.

 

[Helga1027]

Your relationship with Christ is between you and Christ. Although (ideally) our spouses should be encouraging us in our walk with God, this doesn't always happen. If your husband is abusive toward you, I wouldn't take anything he says as truth. Abusive people tend to manipulate and spin things in order to gain control, so he is likely trying to make you feel like you are weak.

Have you discussed this with a pastor or another person from your church? Prayer can help you gain some perspective about your marriage, as well as your own salvation. I think there are two separate issues here - your question of how you can know you are saved, and the manipulation/abuse in your marriage. If you fully believe John 3:16, have declared Jesus as your Lord and Savior and devoted your Life to worshipping Him, then you are saved by His grace covering all your sin. While that is a very basic understanding of salvation, if you have done that - as well as asking God for forgiveness - then you are saved. Obviously our walk with God is a lifelong journey, and we always have more to learn, and we always fall short. But I do not think it is someone else's place, even a spouse, to tell us that we are not saved.

Thanks for your response. No one knows about how he speaks or treats me when at home, they only see his compliments at church when he speaks.

I went to a major christian ministry conference this year and met the top man most call a prophet of God who has been in ministry for years. He said the prophet anointing was upon me. Does this confirm that I am saved? Wouldn't he know?

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[Helga1027]

We can have assurance of salvation even now. Through experiencing things like Christ's love in our heart, the ability to forgive others, a genuine desire, that won't go away, to live soberly, righteously, and godly.

Yet the final confirmation of salvation, which we await, is given when this mortality is given immortality in God's Kingdom of everlasting Joy and Peace in His Righteousness.

We are warned that many who assume they are 'saved' will be rejected by The Lord.(See Matthew 7:21-23)

Based on your description it sounds as if your husband is overreacting and overstating things. If you are showing symptoms of being backslidden etc., there should be an effort to restore your spiritual status in the spirit of love. But it may be that he too is feeling overwhelmed, and is not stable enough spiritually to handle this matter well, so in frustration he lashes out....sounds like there's a need for a mature third party to mediate matters - if both of you can agree to it.

We seldom get better by looking at how another is failing to do their part.

But if we examine ourselves to see where we need to change... with The Lord's help - we can be transformed.

May The Lord Be Pleased to Bless & Keep.

Thank you. I agree we can look at each other's walk but must focus on our own. We will be accountable for our own actions in the end and can't blame someone else if we sinned and missed the mark no matter how bad they treat us.

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[Helga1027]

Awful!



Here is how you know: 1 John 3:14.

This is the new commandment from Jesus: John 13:34, John 15:12 and so 2 John 1:5 and 1 Peter 1:22, 1 Peter 3:8, 1 John 3:17, 1 John 4:20-21, James 2:8, Galatians 5:14, Romans 13:8, Romans 13:10, etc etc

1Co 13:13 So now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love.

Thank you. I try to walk in love but I am so angry now at his abusive words. He blames me and doesn't see how he's been this ways for almost 2 years. He blames me cause he says it's my fault, I am dumb, mentally lazy and not thinking. He has unusual abilities to do many things in his head, unusual abilities with his intellect that I don't have. Just trying to focus at times on certain things is difficult for me . He said he married me cause I had a beautiful heart, not because I was smart but figured the brain can be taught. I tried to keep silent like Jesus before His accusers 1 Peter 2:23 but I failed! I am failing 1 Peter3: 8-9!!!!!! Lord help!



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[EmmaCat]

Please get help. I am praying for you.

 

[John Hyperspace]

Thank you. I try to walk in love but I am so angry now at his abusive words. He blames me and doesn't see how he's been this ways for almost 2 years. He blames me cause he says it's my fault, I am dumb, mentally lazy and not thinking. He has unusual abilities to do many things in his head, unusual abilities with his intellect that I don't have. Just trying to focus at times on certain things is difficult for me . He said he married me cause I had a beautiful heart, not because I was smart but figured the brain can be taught. I tried to keep silent like Jesus before His accusers 1 Peter 2:23 but I failed! I am failing 1 Peter3: 8-9!!!!!! Lord help!

God is always helping us, even when (especially when) it seems He is not. Be strong, you're not failing, you're growing. God will direct your steps, and lead you where you go. You're none of those things he says you are; you're exactly who you're supposed to be right now. Be patient; all storms pass in time. Have faith and hope.

 

[Helga1027]

God is always helping us, even when (especially when) it seems He is not. Be strong, you're not failing, you're growing. God will direct your steps, and lead you where you go. You're none of those things he says you are; you're exactly who you're supposed to be right now. Be patient; all storms pass in time. Have faith and hope.

Thank you so much. May the Lord greatly bless you for your encouraging words to me during this difficult time.

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[NothingIsImpossible]

Well heres one way to think about. If you weren't saved why would you be on here? Get what I am saying? The fact you posted on a christian forum worried about your salvation because of what your husband said shows you believe in God because you are scared your not saved. If you weren't saved then you wouldn't even worry about it or even come here. The fact your here means you care about what God thinks.

As for your husband, don't worry about what he says. Hes not God. And anyone can say "Well God told me....". But people can't always distinguish God speaking from their own thinking. Sounds like he (As you said) is just verbally abusive and is trying to hurt you. He needs to get help with that. Thats not how a husband treats a wife.

 

[Helga1027]

So true. Thanks so much. Never thought of it that way [emoji4] If I was not saved I wouldn't care about it! But I do so I must be.

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[EmmaCat]

Again, I saw your other thread, and please call authorities.

I am praying for you and remember what I said.

You seem to be posting a lot tonight; where is your husband?

 

[devin553344]

When my husband argues with me, he often says things like you are not saved, you're an angel of light, demonic agent, etc...

He even said he was praying Saturday night and knows why the Lord spoke certain things to him. He said numerous times that he wanted me to lead prayer meeting but the Lord told him no.

I am tired. He has been verbally abusive for the years we've been married and a bit physically by threatening to punch me in the face a few times and grabbing my sweater at the neck with his fist in my fave. I now am having difficulty not responding in kind back to him.

The only thing I could hold on to was the Lord during this time . That the Lord was with me. The reason I stay is because of the Lord.

Is my husband right about me?

Sent from my SM-G900W8 using Tapatalk

I'm sorry your in an abusive relationship. Get help before it's too late. About being saved, it begins with believing in Jesus the Christ and God the Father, but you are not saved until resurrected either physically or spiritually. Salvation from death is the resurrection in other words and the wages of sin is death. HTH -Devin

 

[Helga1027]

Again, I saw your other thread, and please call authorities.

I am praying for you and remember what I said.

You seem to be posting a lot tonight; where is your husband?

He was in the basement while I was upstairs on the top floor. Thank you for your prayers

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[Elicia]

When my husband argues with me, he often says things like you are not saved, you're an angel of light, demonic agent, etc...

He even said he was praying Saturday night and knows why the Lord spoke certain things to him. He said numerous times that he wanted me to lead prayer meeting but the Lord told him no.

I am tired. He has been verbally abusive for the years we've been married and a bit physically by threatening to punch me in the face a few times and grabbing my sweater at the neck with his fist in my fave. I now am having difficulty not responding in kind back to him.

The only thing I could hold on to was the Lord during this time . That the Lord was with me. The reason I stay is because of the Lord.

Is my husband right about me?

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[Nigin Christopher]

John 3:16 For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.

If you truely "believe" that Jesus Christ is the Lord and accept Jesus Christ as your "Lord" and "Saviour",and believe that He only can and He has forgiven your sins...you are saved !!!!

And just a small thought!!! God puts you( everyone ) into every situation,in all walks of life, just to make you more Holy and become like Christ one day !!! He is making you grow to be like Him , as we are His children

 

[Elicia]

He is not right, but not my place to say either. I believe he is trying to use God against you. Not saying he is what he is calling you, but the shoe might fit. The man's place is at the head of the household, the wife is to care for him first and her home while he works to support the family. I suggest praying. Pray for him, and for God to show you the path to go. It could possibly be your negative responses towards him that give him such a scued view of you. Try to ask yourself "what would Jesus do?". He would be kind reguardless of the way he is treated. When I feel defeated in my own marriage I do this, and the answer I always find is that of Mother Theresa's famous quotes. be kind anyway, love anyway, care anyway.... Self help doesn't always help. Talking to others only helps until your confronted again. I suggest talking to you own pastor. They may have a marriage counseling option, or even meet with him with your husband to let out your feelings to him in a safe, Godly manor. I have been in an abusive relationship. It is very hard especially with 2 small children. But I push through. I see my opportunities to be kind that can only cause him to be of he will feel guilty. Narrsasistic people don't see themselves ever wrong. Possibly look into that, perhaps his issues are not with you, but himself. I hope you the best!

 

[Helga1027]

He is not right, but not my place to say either. I believe he is trying to use God against you. Not saying he is what he is calling you, but the shoe might fit. The man's place is at the head of the household, the wife is to care for him first and her home while he works to support the family. I suggest praying. Pray for him, and for God to show you the path to go. It could possibly be your negative responses towards him that give him such a scued view of you. Try to ask yourself "what would Jesus do?". He would be kind reguardless of the way he is treated. When I feel defeated in my own marriage I do this, and the answer I always find is that of Mother Theresa's famous quotes. be kind anyway, love anyway, care anyway.... Self help doesn't always help. Talking to others only helps until your confronted again. I suggest talking to you own pastor. They may have a marriage counseling option, or even meet with him with your husband to let out your feelings to him in a safe, Godly manor. I have been in an abusive relationship. It is very hard especially with 2 small children. But I push through. I see my opportunities to be kind that can only cause him to be of he will feel guilty. Narrsasistic people don't see themselves ever wrong. Possibly look into that, perhaps his issues are not with you, but himself. I hope you the best!

Thanks Elicia. I agree that prayer works best.

I try my best to be kind, clean the house to his liking, cook his meals the way he likes, get his water/coffee, get his shoes if we're going out, make his snacks, take out the garbage, do the laundry, pick up his dirty clothes, do the shopping, along with any other requests that he makes because I believe as a wife he is my first priority after Jesus and I take care of him.

But I did keep quiet the day he grabbed my neck and head to move me over, a week ago approx, but we weren't even arguing.

I have tried to keep quiet when he yells insults at me. In the beginning it was easier. Even yesterday I resisted and was able to keep calm trying to reason with him for awhile but he kept coming back at me with more. The more he hammered at me verbally, something he said at one point hit home and I started hurting inside...I know that's when I start responding back.

I know I need to walk away if I can onto another level of the house, maybe that will help. If I am not in his vicinity he can't say anything to me that will get that hurt starting inside. He could follow me but he'd be tired after awhile if I am 3 floors up. I made the mistake yesterday of working in the room next to his office yesterday. Too close when he's upset.

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[Poppyseed78]

I'm so sorry you're going through this. It sounds like you are not in a safe situation. Please, I urge you to talk to someone and get help. You should not be living in fear of your own husband. I'm praying for your safety.