Having a hard time waiting on God

[leothelioness]

My whole life I've wanted nothing more than to be a wife and mother. It's something that I've been desiring a lot lately and I've been praying about it a lot more. I just want to experience that love that one has for a spouse and for their children.

I've never been in a relationship and I've never been in love and I feel that I'm really missing out on something that most people take for granted. I'm just having a hard time waiting on God to work through my life in this regard. I'm so afraid that maybe he won't let me experience that kind of love. I'm just finding it harder and harder to be patient and trust in God. I'm beginning to think it will never happen for me.

 

[leothelioness]

Any helpful replies would be appreciated.

 

[Bluelion]

don't force it when the time is right god will put some one in your life. You are still young. I did not meet my wife until I was 31. I know how lonely the wait can be, but what is worse to rush into a relationship God did not intend. That just leads to suffering. Be patient it will happen.

 

[98cwitr]

Your hopes and aspirations are not unwarranted, for God has given you such a heart. You're 25. At 26 I met the girl that 4 years later will soon be my wife. I am so thankful to the Lord that He has sustained this relationship.

I met her in church, in Sunday School class of all places.

Are there God fearing men your age at your church?

May I ask what you do for a living?

Do you have any children?

 

[Rhamiel]

I do not have any advice for you my dear sister in Christ
but I can pray for you

 

[sonny1293]

 

[KaylaHansa]

My whole life I've wanted nothing more than to be a wife and mother. It's something that I've been desiring a lot lately and I've been praying about it a lot more. I just want to experience that love that one has for a spouse and for their children.

I've never been in a relationship and I've never been in love and I feel that I'm really missing out on something that most people take for granted. I'm just having a hard time waiting on God to work through my life in this regard. I'm so afraid that maybe he won't let me experience that kind of love. I'm just finding it harder and harder to be patient and trust in God. I'm beginning to think it will never happen for me.

I would encourage you to find fulfillment in Christ, not a man or children. I know that might sound kind of harsh, but if you're not happy single, you won't be happy married. Only God can fill your heart. I know it seems like it's not true. I know the feeling- I used to be very desperate for a relationship and romance. I felt that I would be so much happier with a man that loved me. But then God began to open to me that I wasn't believing right. I needed to focus on Him.

Though I did it with reluctance, I prayed and asked Him to help me not be obsessed about finding a husband. And you know what? He did! I still struggle with it, but I've come a long way. And life is happier when you don't crave romance.

I'm not saying romance is sinful, because it isn't, at all. But find fulfillment in God, and know that whether He sends a man into your life or not, is for your own good.

 

[leothelioness]

Are there God fearing men your age at your church?

I don't go to church right now. Haven't been in years.

May I ask what you do for a living?

I work in a hair salon.

Do you have any children?

No.

 

[leothelioness]

I do not have any advice for you my dear sister in Christ
but I can pray for you

Thank you, Rhamiel!

 

[leothelioness]

I would encourage you to find fulfillment in Christ, not a man or children. I know that might sound kind of harsh, but if you're not happy single, you won't be happy married. Only God can fill your heart. I know it seems like it's not true. I know the feeling- I used to be very desperate for a relationship and romance. I felt that I would be so much happier with a man that loved me. But then God began to open to me that I wasn't believing right. I needed to focus on Him.

Though I did it with reluctance, I prayed and asked Him to help me not be obsessed about finding a husband. And you know what? He did! I still struggle with it, but I've come a long way. And life is happier when you don't crave romance.

I'm not saying romance is sinful, because it isn't, at all. But find fulfillment in God, and know that whether He sends a man into your life or not, is for your own good.

I used to think the same thing you did and I even prayed for it, but the desire never went away. I realised I was just deluding myself into thinking I didn't want or need companionship. Celibacy is not God's plan for me. As harsh as it may sound, God cannot fill the void for physical companionship.

 

[Rhamiel]

I don't go to church right now. Haven't been in years.

even though I am not Baptist, I would recommend you find a church you are comfortable with and start attending
not to find a man
just because it will help you in general

 

[leothelioness]

I have a church I can go to, but since I work on Saturdays all I want to do on Sunday is sleep in. If I didn't work on Saturdays I'd probably feel like getting up and going. That's no excuse, I know.

 

[KaylaHansa]

I used to think the same thing you did and I even prayed for it, but the desire never went away. I realised I was just deluding myself into thinking I didn't want or need companionship. Celibacy is not God's plan for me. As harsh as it may sound, God cannot fill the void for physical companionship.

I'm not saying celibacy is God's plan for you. I'm saying that you shouldn't rely on on a husband for happiness. I'm not saying you can't have a desire for one, but that desire can easily get out of control. And of course people need companionship, that's why God urges Christians in the Bible to have fellowship and love one another (which is why you should go to church). But a romantic relationship is different. Again, I'm not saying that a romantic relationship is wrong or to be looked down upon, but I think you should fully put your trust in God to make you happy, while you are single. But, if it is His plan, He will send you a husband.

 

[SoulBap6]

God did not make a man or a Woman to live alone, God created that relationship. The desire to be a mother and wife is very normal. First I believe you need a relationship first with the lord. Second you must ask God for a Spouse that is a Christian and of the same faith as you. You must believe that God can and will answer your prayer. Last wait upon the Lord to answer your Prayer. All this is no good unless you follow what I have suggested, be serious and your pray will be answered

 

[98cwitr]

I don't go to church right now. Haven't been in years.


I work in a hair salon.


No.

Single, a job, and no children?! The opportunity for you is on your side

I do recommend finding a church though. Better than Christian mingle!

Find a church you like, pray about it, and if God so wills it, you will find a God fearing man there. Believe that God has a plan for your life, seek that plan, and the worry will melt away. This frame of mind has helped me tremendously in the past, but has also not been empty, but yielded blessed fruit.

If you can get Wednesday's off from work, go for Wednesday night services...most churches have them.

 

[leothelioness]

Single, a job, and no children?! The opportunity for you is on your side

I hope so!

I do recommend finding a church though. Better than Christian mingle!

Haha, yeah. I'm not that desperate.....yet.

Find a church you like, pray about it, and if God so wills it, you will find a God fearing man there. Believe that God has a plan for your life, seek that plan, and the worry will melt away. This frame of mind has helped me tremendously in the past, but has also not been empty, but yielded blessed fruit.

If you can get Wednesday's off from work, go for Wednesday night services...most churches have them.

Like I told Rhamiel, I have a church I can go to, but I'm so tired from the work week that I don't feel like going. That's no excuse, but there you go. And my boss would not let me off from work, not even for church.

 

[leothelioness]

Back when I was still in church regularly I did used to pray that God would help me to find a good person to be with, but it never happened and it left me wondering why He never allowed it. I still don't know why I've never been allowed that when others have, but I've come to resent it. And in a way I resent God.

 

[TreverSlyFox]

I don't go to church right now. Haven't been in years.

But you want Him to hear your prayers even though you will not devote even 1 hour a week to publicly praise him in His house?

I think you might want to spend a little time examining exactly what your relationship with the Lord is. You may fine that your waiting for Him because He's waiting for YOU to fulfill your part of the bargain.

Almost every promise God makes with us carries a Condition, there is something God agrees to do IF we do something to gain the reward God has promised. Even in His promise of salvation there is a condition, we must Believe. With belief we gain everlasting life as His adopted Child into the family of the chosen. He has made many promises in the scriptures, but every one comes with a condition that we must do something to gain the reward or blessing.

So why haven't you been to church in years?
There isn't one where you are?
You've been to every one and they'er all creepy?
It's such a hassle to get up early Sunday morning and get dressed an go to publicly worship Him for 1 hour a week?

You must have some excuse? Now sit down and examine it and judge it's validity, for it's very possible that God is and has been waiting for you.

Just because God hasn't acted within YOUR timetable for a spouse you resent Him, your kidding right? Have you ever given thought that God may not think your READY as a Christian for a relationship? That your not ready to be a mother yet? That doesn't mean you will never be ready for them, just not now. You seem to have a lot of growing up to do for you do not seem ready to follow God's plan for your life and follow Him where ever it leads. Rather your setting conditions for God to do before your happy with what he offers.

 

[Petruchio]

But you want Him to hear your prayers even though you will not devote even 1 hour a week to publicly praise him in His house?

That suggests that one must "earn" the right to be heard by God, even though, being justified by Him with the imputed righteousness of Christ, we are Kings and Priests in His sight. Kings, in that we may boldly pray, Priests, that we may enter into the Holiest and speak with Him.

We do not know her circumstances, and therefore we cannot judge on why she cannot attend church. Perhaps she simply doesn't feel called to it. But even just praying or being friendly with a Christian friend is enough to qualify as "church," since where two or more are gathered, there is Christ in the midst of them.

But, even if she does not have that friend, if she is praying to God, and studying the scripture, who dares speak against her? Leave her alone, and let God sort things out.

I think you might want to spend a little time examining exactly what your relationship with the Lord is. You may fine that your waiting for Him because He's waiting for YOU to fulfill your part of the bargain.

Almost every promise God makes with us carries a Condition, there is something God agrees to do IF we do something to gain the reward God has promised. Even in His promise of salvation there is a condition, we must Believe.

But, thanks be to God, that we did not choose to believe in Christ, but, rather, Christ chose us so that we would believe, and also to produce fruit in His name that would abide forever (for nothing that man can do can ever abide, so all that we do produce, is God who is producing it).

"Ye have not chosen me, but I have chosen you, and ordained you, that ye should go and bring forth fruit, and that your fruit should remain: that whatsoever ye shall ask of the Father in my name, he may give it you."
(Joh 15:16)

Thus it is by the grace of God that we are what we are, performing good works, for that is the purpose of salvation, not its cause. It is the result, not the initiator. And so, resting in this, we may look forward to eternal bliss, putting aside all fears.

As for the OP, I would offer this scripture as something for her (you) to cling to:

Rom_8:28 And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.

 

[98cwitr]

Back when I was still in church regularly I did used to pray that God would help me to find a good person to be with, but it never happened and it left me wondering why He never allowed it. I still don't know why I've never been allowed that when others have, but I've come to resent it. And in a way I resent God.

Trust me, I just moved 25 miles from the city and my church is there. Feels like such a chore on Sunday mornings to get up early (I work during the week), do my routine, and then drive 50 miles round trip just to go to church....but once I get there and see my friends and the youth (they are funny!) then Im glad I did so. Most importantly, we get to hear the Word and praise Him. Once it becomes part of your routine, that feeling of "this is my only day" starts to go away. jm2c.

Side question: If it is God's plan that you remain single, are you willing to accept that?