That "manly" handshake

[LovesToBless]

When a man shakes hands and doesn't hold back his strength, do you think he's doing that on purpose? Do some guys use this as a power thing?

I'm all for a good, firm handshake, whether from a man or a woman. That deadfish thing is ...blah.

But seriously can't a man tell that a handshake done quite strongly has the potential to hurt someone, especially a woman?

Certainly some women could do that hard a handshake too, but I don't think most do. I don't have a physical problem like arthritis or anything, so that's not prompting my question.

Thoughts?

 

[whitebeaches]

i like a nice warm gentle yet firm hand shake from a man not a vice grip type a hand shake. Ow!!!!! think some guys either dont realize they are doing it or they are doing so on purpose.

 

[LovesToBless]

i like a nice warm gentle yet firm hand shake from a man not a vice grip type a hand shake. Ow!!!!! think some guys either dont realize they are doing it or they are doing so on purpose.

yeah, oww it right.

A recent experience made me wonder if it's on purpose. Didn't think that when it happened, but then it occured to me and thought I'd get some input.

 

[whitebeaches]

oh some men do it on purpose for sure to show off their strength. Girl! Dont they know we can see their strength in their muscles alone???????

 

[LovesToBless]

oh some men do it on purpose for sure to show off their strength. Girl! Dont they know we can see their strength in their muscles alone???????

Yeah, I figure that...just don't know why a guy would do that to an older, married woman. I mean I could be his mom ~ that kind of "older".

 

[whitebeaches]

um, oh my!!!!! I have no idea why. I would guess he didnt know his own strength!!!!!

 

[Avniel]

Yeah, I figure that...just don't know why a guy would do that to an older, married woman. I mean I could be his mom ~ that kind of "older".

I know for me I am just always taught to give a firm handshake and never let someone out shake you sometimes you just become accustome to the challenge

 

[whitebeaches]

I know for me I am just always taught to give a firm handshake and never let someone out shake you sometimes you just become accustome to the challenge

LOL but with a woman???? man, you better hope you nevah handshake one of those body builder womans hands she just might surprise you with her super grip. :^)

 

[Lilymay]

I would give the benefit of the doubt and say it is not done on purpose and sometimes they do not realize their own strength. And I don't think the "they don't realize their own strength" is an excuse. Someone who works with their hands, take a mechanic for instance, works with his hands all day long, everyday... pulling, pushing, grabbing, twisting, etc. The strength build up in their hands... well when it comes to a handshake they are not using all their strength...they just don't realize how much they are using.

 

[BigDaddy4]

When a man shakes hands and doesn't hold back his strength, do you think he's doing that on purpose? Do some guys use this as a power thing?

I'm all for a good, firm handshake, whether from a man or a woman. That deadfish thing is ...blah.

But seriously can't a man tell that a handshake done quite strongly has the potential to hurt someone, especially a woman?

Certainly some women could do that hard a handshake too, but I don't think most do. I don't have a physical problem like arthritis or anything, so that's not prompting my question.

Thoughts?

Some just don't know their own strength, or maybe they weren't taught to shake hands properly.

I hate those deadfish shakes - from either a man or a woman.

For me, I try to give women a firm handshake but I gauge it by the size and age of the woman (older, frail women not very hard, younger ones more firm). Then I react to their grips accordingly. I don't want to hurt a deadfish gripper by my grip.

Like many things, I believe it is a social/setting awareness thing. Act according to where you're at and who you're meeting.

 

[FaithPrevails]

Some just don't know their own strength, or maybe they weren't taught to shake hands properly.

I hate those deadfish shakes - from either a man or a woman.

For me, I try to give women a firm handshake but I gauge it by the size and age of the woman (older, frail women not very hard, younger ones more firm). Then I react to their grips accordingly. I don't want to hurt a deadfish gripper by my grip.

Like many things, I believe it is a social/setting awareness thing. Act according to where you're at and who you're meeting.

I totally agree.

 

[Conservativation]

In the power game the trick is to close your grip before they get theor hand situated, then you have basically just the fingers in your grip and ....YOU OWN EM!!!!!!!!!!


If there is a dead fish shake, I usually wipe off my hands reflexively....it feels unsanitary

 

[whitebeaches]

In the power game the trick is to close your grip before they get theor hand situated, then you have basically just the fingers in your grip and ....YOU OWN EM!!!!!!!!!!


If there is a dead fish shake, I usually wipe off my hands reflexively....it feels unsanitary

lol

 

[Kol]

Maybe your hands are just really flimsy..?

 

[LovesToBless]

O.K. the thing is...this is a young man who I'd met before this more recent time.

When I first met him, he didn't it the same way. It was firm and all that, but ...how can I say it...appropriately so. Not fishy at all, still manly, but not crushing.

This time though...ouch! It was only a matter of a couple months in between. Maybe he's been lifting weights since last time.

 

[Redguard]

The "manly" handshakes are supposed to be reserved for other men.

 

[LovesToBless]

The "manly" handshakes are supposed to be reserved for other men.

Thanks, Red I agree.

Update...I asked my son about this guy...and he thinks the guy just flaked out at the time.

 

[dinonum]

I don't really care about/for handshakes tbh. Mostly older men seem to be the ones I've had issues with practically snapping the bones in my hands, lol.

 

[seaflower]

I love having men try to "outshake" me. I've been in the business world for 9 years now and I can squeeze their hand back enough to cause marks.

 

[Mixolydian]

I think it's just overcompensation for the "man hug," you know... lean in and bump shoulders with a back slap, followed by quickly pulling away to look furtively if anyone saw that.