Taking A Break From Dating

[PeculiarTreasure]

Have any of you purposefully took a break from dating? Weather God told you or just a personal decision?

How long did you take a break? What are some of the main things you learned?

 

[PeculiarTreasure]

I haven't had so much has a crush in the past year. I got saved last April. (It's almost been a full year now)

I was apart of a free Christian dating site and even met someone on there and went out with him once. (yeah, nothing happend there). Shortly after this God convicted me and told me to get rid of my account. I did and it's just been amazing!

I honestly didn't realize just how much time and energy I put into "looking for love". God basically said "Crystal, you need to focus on me right now." He didn't even say how long. I honestly have no desire to go back to that site or any dating site (not saying they're wrong or anything they're just not for me) but God just showed me that I didn't need them that He's got my love life under control!

 

[Inkachu]

Awww, Crystal, I didn't know you were a baby Christian

I haven't gone on a date in about two and a half years. It's been partly my own choosing, and partly because I haven't met anyone I'd want to date. It's like, I could've gone on dates, I've been asked out, and I didn't refuse because I was "taking a break from dating", I refused because I didn't feel it was the right time or the right person. Hope that makes sense!

 

[white dove]

Have any of you purposefully took a break from dating? Weather God told you or just a personal decision?

Never intentionally, no. If I'm not feeling it, I just won't date. It's just that "simple" for me. If I felt that God wanted me to be single for a time, it was usually something I was okay with anyway because of the prospects coming my way.

How long did you take a break? What are some of the main things you learned?

I'm not sure. I don't really measure my life that way.


I learned more about what I want and need in a partner (because of the time to evaluate old relationships). I developed my other passions more.

 

[PeculiarTreasure]

Awww, Crystal, I didn't know you were a baby Christian

I haven't gone on a date in about two and a half years. It's been partly my own choosing, and partly because I haven't met anyone I'd want to date. It's like, I could've gone on dates, I've been asked out, and I didn't refuse because I was "taking a break from dating", I refused because I didn't feel it was the right time or the right person. Hope that makes sense!

Yep, it's quite a story in itself. I'll have to tell ya about it sometime.

Makes perfect sense.

 

[Rhye]

I took a break for a couple of years. I didn't really plan it to be that long, it just happened. It was a very personal decision and God helped me get through that period without losing my mind.

After the last relationship, I also realized I was not a very good girlfriend, and needed to focus on myself. I had to work on improving who I was before ever placing myself in a situation to build a relationship with someone.

I learned that I am more patient.
I learned that I forgive (myself a little more and the person I will be with).
I learned I can definitely be able to better communicate with my partner.
I learned I'm not perfect, and he wont be either.

I also learned that my taste in men has changed so much. For the better, I think. =)

 

[PeculiarTreasure]

I took a break for a couple of years. I didn't really plan it to be that long, it just happened. It was a very personal decision and God helped me get through that period without losing my mind.

After the last relationship, I also realized I was not a very good girlfriend, and needed to focus on myself. I had to work on improving who I was before ever placing myself in a situation to build a relationship with someone.

I learned that I am more patient.
I learned that I forgive (myself a little more and the person I will be with).
I learned that I would be an awesome girlfriend now. loll.
I learned I can definitely be able to better communicate with my partner.
I learned I'm not perfect, and he wont be either.

I also learned that my taste in men has changed so much. For the better, I think. =)

Those are some awesome lessons to learn! Good for you!

 

[Apollo Celestio]

It's never been priority. So there has never been a need to abstain. The current situation however is still a mystery.

 

[Thunder Peel]

I've taken a 24-year break from dating.

 

[Blank123]

i've been taking a break since last August. It wasn't any easy decision to make by any means, but its one I've felt God calling me to for a while and He gave me some very clear confirmation that it was the right move to make.

since then i've just been spending time healing from losing a relationship with a guy i really loved and learning to enjoy the situation in life God has called me to. there have been a couple of guys since that I would have seriously considered going out with but in the end it was too soon and God didn't give me any peace over it. The one guy showed me his true colours when i told him, which means i wouldn't consider going out with him even when i feel God giving me freedom to date. The other guy, well he's still a really good friend. we know neither of us are actually in a place to consider getting into a relationship and i don't see its likely that will change. but we still have a strong friendship which i thank God for

what have i learned? to stop worrying so much about my relationship status. i do go through periods where i'm frustrated and worried that no one will ever love me again or that i will have to spend the rest of my life alone. i think everyone does. but what i keep coming back to is I worship a God who created the universe. I worship a God who is sovereign enough to call sinners from darkness into His light and open their hearts and understanding to be saved. I can certainly trust Him with my life, whether or not that includes any more romance or a husband or kids*. I can trust Him to direct my path as He sees fit. When I try to take control thats when i start getting stressed and frustrated. When i just live my life and leave Him in control, I have peace.

I don't know how long this break is going to continue. for all i know i'll meet the man of my dreams tomorrow. perhaps in ten years. perhaps never. I've got no game plan for this, i'm just trusting His leading. I do have an eharmony account that i purchased a trial for back a few months ago when i was going through one of my frustrated states. It expires next month and i've already made the decision not to renew. And i do have one at CDFF that i got for the same reason. I'm not actively pursuing anything at either site though. I may wind up taking both profiles down completely. I'm not sure yet.

*i don't believe in The One theory and i'm not speaking about that here. But i do believe He can lead me to people who would be good matches for me and He can give me and the guy wisdom to know if getting married would be a wise choice.

 

[enelya_taralom]

I've never purposefully taken a break, but it has been over five years since i have had a date, and even at that, I have only ever had a grand total of four single dates (none ever went to a second) in 28 years... For me it's never been as simple as I want to date so I will, or I want to take a break so I will... guys just aren't attracted to me, so I pretty much get forced to take breaks, even if I would prefer to not.

 

[PeculiarTreasure]

I've never purposefully taken a break, but it has been over five years since i have had a date, and even at that, I have only ever had a grand total of four single dates (none ever went to a second) in 28 years... For me it's never been as simple as I want to date so I will, or I want to take a break so I will... guys just aren't attracted to me, so I pretty much get forced to take breaks, even if I would prefer to not.

I understand this all too well. I guess in a way I've taken a 26 year break from dating myself! Not because I really wanted to but no guy ever came along that I would consider dating.

It was weird though after my first and only date last year I just honestly didn't like it. I was like "why did I wanna do this again?" It was the weirdest thing.

 

[PeculiarTreasure]

I've taken a 24-year break from dating.

26 years for me! Beat ya!

Seriously though Austin any girl would be lucky to have you! You rock and don't ya forget it!

 

[mina]

not really, but i have purposely NOT DATED people that wanted to date me, but i was open to dating the right person. I just didn't feel i had to date a bunch of people i wasn't attracted to or who were not right for me to find the right person. So the pickins were slim for years and I didn't date during those years, but not because of any self imposed rule or that I felt God was leading me towards that.

 

[Revived]

Two years ago, I chose to focus exclusively on my relationship with the Lord and with my kiddos. Since I've made this decision, I've never been happier or more fulfilled. It's been amazing.

 

[Rory]

Still pretty soon for me on this but pretty sure a "break" is what I'm starting and will be on for a while now. Too much to recover from and the need to focus on Jesus for a while till I'm happy with that relationship before I make a real attempt again at dating.

Who knows though, if God brings someone my way sooner I'm not gonna argue. I just don't think thats part of His immediate plans for me.

 

[GQ Chris]

I'm just going to relax for now. I'm in a season where it just isn't the time yet.

 

[Keri]

Have any of you purposefully took a break from dating? Weather God told you or just a personal decision?

How long did you take a break? What are some of the main things you learned?

Yes. I am taking a break right now.

Did God tell me or was it a personal decision? Well God never really TELLS me to do something. I believe He lays things on our hearts and it's up to us to either chose to or not. The Lord has layed it on my heart lately to take a break for a while. Heal from the hurt of my marriage and now the divorce.

For now, I'm taking a year from the day I left Mark. But I might consider extending it another year. It just depends. I will NOT date at all until the divorce is finalized.

I'm just not ready. I need to grow in God, discover myself and His plans for me. The last two months (!!!) of being single have been the best time in my life. God has shown Himself so much to me and has already been working in me.

 

[K9_Trainer]

It's never been priority. So there has never been a need to abstain. The current situation however is still a mystery.

This.

Except for the last part. Current situation is quite clear: I'm committed.

 

[PeculiarTreasure]

Yes. I am taking a break right now.

Did God tell me or was it a personal decision? Well God never really TELLS me to do something. I believe He lays things on our hearts and it's up to us to either chose to or not. The Lord has layed it on my heart lately to take a break for a while. Heal from the hurt of my marriage and now the divorce.

For now, I'm taking a year from the day I left Mark. But I might consider extending it another year. It just depends. I will NOT date at all until the divorce is finalized.

I'm just not ready. I need to grow in God, discover myself and His plans for me. The last two months (!!!) of being single have been the best time in my life. God has shown Himself so much to me and has already been working in me.

Good for you girl!I'm very proud of you!