Are you going to answer my question, AV? At this point, I dont really expect to be able to get you to change your interpretation of the Bible, but I still think it would be beneficial if you could have a worldview thats at least consistent with the physical evidence, even if its not a parsimonious one.
Other than evolution, I think the Oomphalos hypothesis is the only thing that can explain this, but there are several possible versions of it. One is just embedded ERVs that mimic what evolution would have produced, the same way embedded age mimics what it would look like if the earth had actually existed for billions of years. You could also say that God left this evidence behind in order to test our faithor that Satan did, if you dont like the idea of God having deliberately deceived us, and you think its acceptable to believe that Satan could control the genomes of animals when God created them.
A third possibility is that God was aware ahead of time how many humanitarian and environmental benefits the theory of evolution would produce, and created evidence that would convince us of evolution for this reason. In this case God would be deliberately deceiving us also, but for our own benefit, since He would have known that humanity is better off with the theory of evolution than without it. If youre looking for an explanation for this evidence thats consistent with a literal interpretation of Genesis, this is the best one that I can think of.
Of course, none of these ideas have the elegant simplicity of the idea that evolution happened, and that Genesis is intended to be non-literal. But at least with one of these ideas youd have a belief system that takes the physical evidence into account.