Come To My Table...

[faithmom]

Mare, I wish I could bring you and your DH into our pre-marriage presentation with us. New couples so need to hear that it is the simple gestures amid the pace a chaos that keep things strong, but the occasional "WOW" memory is good to have in the files too...for the sake of reminiscing.

 

[marezee]

Mare, I wish I could bring you and your DH into our pre-marriage presentation with us. New couples so need to hear that it is the simple gestures amid the pace a chaos that keep things strong, but the occasional "WOW" memory is good to have in the files too...for the sake of reminiscing.

i so agree with you! thanks!

 

[faithmom]

Mare....good question on my thread. In what ways have your parent's attributes, talents and passions influenced you and become a part of you? Tell it all girlfriend! I think our heritage is essential to recognize and understand in our lives.

 

[marezee]

hmmm...let's see.

My dad always kept his emotions to himself. He rarely said "I Love you," or kissed us. he barely hugged us. But i could see his love for us & my mom in what he did for us. He was a hard worker & loved country music, fishing, camping, playing pool, gardening, & building models. Later in life he took up cooking.

My mom was very organized, a loud mouth (LOL), fun-loving, high spirited, the disciplinarian, never was a good cook, but did ok, loves cross-word puzzles & bingo. She used to love camping as well. but of course now it's not possible. She had a hard life, was married to an abuser, & then met my dad. He fell in love with her and married her with 3 kids of her own, then they had 3 more. We weren't rich in money, but there was lots of love, even if it wasn't shown or said often. I see that now, but didn't then.

I used to be like my dad was--closed down to all. never showing my emotions. even though i was sensitive as a child, i learned it didn't get me anything but picked on in school. So i toughened up & followed my dad's lead on that one. not a good choice as i look back, but we live and learn. Now i know it's very important to not only show your love, but to voice that love for one another every day! Because life is really shorter than we'd like to admit.

I also acquired my dad's enthusiasm for fishing...we used to go fishing together all the time....i cherish those memories now. My boys are just starting to learn to fish. it's exciting.
I like country music...my dad would blare it at home and in the car. I never liked it b4, but i do now. and of course i got his gardening fever, but hadn't until this year been able to take that on.
i love to cook. i am organized and disciplined. I think my creative side is definitely from my dad.
I have also acquired some not so nice attributes that i am still working on to correct. I think I yell too much at my boys (my mom always yelled at us as kids), i sometimes speak b4 i think, i still hold some emotions in...especially anger & resentment, and from my dad--business first, play later.
I need to loosen up sometimes...my dH always tells me that. I tend to be too serious at times. My DH always cracks a joke when he sees that i'm getting too serious.
anyway, i hope i answered the question. I probably could go on...but i really need to go now. The laundry awaits!

 

[faithmom]

Of course the laundry awaits! Business first! LOL! (now how exactly do we get creative and inspired about laundry...a question I have pondered many times.)

Mare, what a rock you are in so many ways....to see that your family held so much love even if it wasn't said out loud. Especially for men, what they "do" is an expression of love. It is a lesson I had to come to understand through my step-father. As a marine and attorney, he wasn't the affectionate type. It was a hard lesson for me, but so valuable in understanding the mind of a man. Some people enter adulthood, never able to forgive their parents, and to come to understand that some of the things that hurt were not really as it seemed at the time. You have that ability and it is wonderful.

As for the faults you see in yourself, just remember, that all of those things can be strengths as well. Don't be too hard on yourself, you are a wonderful mother, wife, daughter and daughter-in-law.

In the words of Popeye- the sailor man. "I yam what I yam and that's all that I yam." Take that as your motto for one day when you feel down on yourself.

Beautifullly written BTW!

Hugs!

 

[marezee]

thank you faith....i really appreciated that!
So many times I go through the day feeling unappreciated.
You know...when i make something for dinner and the boys won't eat it...
won't even try it; when I clean the house and no one notices;
when i do laundry and no one says "thank you";
when i drive everyone to and fro; etc...I'm sure you KWIM!!
But reading what you posted, helped me see that with those deeds, i am showing my family that i love them, and they WILL appreciate it someday...even if it is not today!

 

[4Everloved]

I really slowed down and read these last posts. Meaningful to God, what we're doing for our husbands, family, and the 'dirty deeds' like laundry, bathroom scrubbing, greasy-pots-and pans-scrubbing, etc. can bring. As a servant, God puts no pricetag on us; we are just simply precious to Him. It is like we are washing Jesus' feet when we serve. Nice for me to say that, but do I see it myself???? Not usually. Hope this will remind me.

Mare, have you found a good church yet?

What do you and your DH do these days when you can get a babysitter and some time alone?

Do you have a swimming pool or access to one?

Did that neighbor across the street ever move away? The one with the record?

Do you like to watch t.v. at all? If so, what are a couple of your favorite shows?

What about reading? What kind of things do you like to read?

That's all for now. Hope you have a great Friday!

 

[4Everloved]

I just thought of some more questions while I was taking Caleb to the potty

Do you have a favorite parenting book?

How do you feel about being an older mother? I know we've touched on this before at the other thread; I just wanted to hear your opinion on more specifics.

Did you catch any fish the last time you went fishing?

Do you like to suntan?

Do you like to watch sports with your husband? Does he like sports?

Have you always been organized and disciplined? Can you send some my way in a nice brown paper package?

Are you still in contact with friends from high school?

 

[faithmom]

Oooh. Mare, 4ever and I are going to put you on overload. (4ever, I have to go find your FTB thread....hmmmm...)

Mare, returning your questions..

What were you like in high school?
Tell me about your friends/circle(s)...
What kind of school was it?

What teacher(s) inspired you?

Were you happy with your school?

I'm also adding: Have you gone to any class reunions, and how did it go?

 

[marezee]

Mare, have you found a good church yet?
yes! I was attending Temple Baptist Church for about 4 months b4 i met my DH, and we were married there and dedicated all of our boys there. I was also baptized there as well.

http://temple-baptist.org/pages/page.asp?page_id=10744

What do you and your DH do these days when you can get a babysitter and some time alone?
hmmmm....it is not often we get a sitter. But if and when we do, we usually go out to dinner or see a movie...we don't have time to do both.
We intentionally keep our boys on a strict bedtime schedule. They are in bed by 8pm usually. We feel a good night's sleep is important for them at this age. When my DH is not working the next day, we usually watch a movie at home after the boys are in bed. We are too exhausted to do anything else. pretty boring huh?!!

Do you have a swimming pool or access to one?
We have a kiddie pool, and this year we just got a 3ft high 10ft circular pool for the boys. it has a filter, so i don't have to empty and clean it daily. We also go to the local pools....at Spa park in Saratoga. they have a water slide, a huge pool ranging from 0ft to 10ft, and a kiddie pool with a big umbrella sprinkler. the boys love it there. There are also some lakes that we frequent that have swimming areas with lifeguards. i don't like the sand much. but i tolerate it for my family.
It's really beautiful here in the saratoga region. http://www.saratoga.com/

Did that neighbor across the street ever move away? The one with the record?
No, but we rarely see him walking around outside. He got rid of his red truck. i'm not sure what he is driving these days...pretty nervous about that, but he does ride around with his woman in her van quite often.
we get dirty looks from her all the time. oh well. As long as they stay away from us, i don't care.

Do you like to watch t.v. at all? If so, what are a couple of your favorite shows?
I recently started watching Jon & Kate Plus 8. A couple who had twin girls, then had sextuplets, & live in PA. It's a cute show. I also like Ghost Whisperer, Moonlight, How I Met Your Mother, American Idol. that's about it...i usually like the HGTV channel when nothing else is on.

What about reading? What kind of things do you like to read?
i love to read, but reading books or novels is difficult. i used to read novels in about a week, now i cannot even get through the first chapter in a week! LOL! When i do read books, it's usually Stephen King. Currently "Duma Key." otherwise, i read my scrapbooking & parenting mags. and of course the Bible!


Thanks for the questions dear heart!

 

[marezee]

I just thought of some more questions while I was taking Caleb to the potty
are you potty training him, or is he already trained? I just started training Jake!

Do you have a favorite parenting book?
I've read all the "What to expect..." books. Not sure I agree with everything, but they do give some good advice... you just have to pick and choose. KWIM? I also get Parenting magazine.

How do you feel about being an older mother? I know we've touched on this before at the other thread; I just wanted to hear your opinion on more specifics.
well...that's a tough one. I feel old! LOL! I am so tired at night. sometimes i cannot sleep...KWIM? My back aches, my shoulders ache, i'm most likely going through perimenopause...scarey. but i wouldn't change anything. Having my babies later in life was a good choice for me. I wasn't ready to have children earlier...i liked being young and unattached. nothing to tie me down. And i'm glad i got all that out of my system. Now i am content to be settled down and very happy that God has given me my boys to take care of.
it's difficult in that i am out of shape, and not as young as most of the moms of the other boys my kids go to school with, but i just have to get over it! I have to know somehow that i have something to offer those younger moms, be it life experience or whatever. but i AM enjoying my time being a mom!
Did you catch any fish the last time you went fishing?
hmmmm...I cannot really remember the last time i actually fished.
I do remember fishing with my dad, and i always caught at least one fish when i was with him! LOL! he knew all the good spots!
Do you like to suntan?
I used to...not anymore. I usually burn the first couple of times I expose my winter skin to the sun. Even with sunscreen on! Then I tan. I don't sit or lay out in the sun deliberately to tan, it just happens naturally.

Do you like to watch sports with your husband? Does he like sports?
oddly enough, my DH does not watch sports. He never got into them.
I used to watch football in college, but that was only to hang out with friends. LOL! now i watch figure skating and the olympics. but the boys want to play soccer in the fall, so i guess we better bone up on it!
Have you always been organized and disciplined? Can you send some my way in a nice brown paper package?
I would have to say yes. It's in my genes! LOL! My mom used to tell me that when i was little, i had all these little figurines on my dresser. she would come in to dust, and place them back on the dresser in what she thought was the right place. well, i would come home and ask her..."who was in my room...someone moved my such & such!" LOL! I always had a place for everything, & everything had a place! It's hard now, because my boys have not inherited that gene! I am constantly on them to put their things away!

Are you still in contact with friends from high school?
no. i didn't have many friends in high school. i moved away right after graduation and lost touch with everyone from that area.

 

[marezee]

Oooh. Mare, 4ever and I are going to put you on overload. (4ever, I have to go find your FTB thread....hmmmm...)

Mare, returning your questions..

What were you like in high school?
I was always very shy in school. didn't have many friends. too scared to talk to people. i was an A student as well. I was in the honor society, on the yearbook committee, french club, & volunteered in the guidance counselor's office. teacher's pet. not by choice. not very well noticed or liked.
Tell me about your friends/circle(s)... I had just a handfull of friends. I could literally count them on one hand. One girl just hung out with me to copy my work. One was Italian like me, so we were "gumbas" LOL. a third was an hispanic guy, whom my father was wary of and didn't want me hanging out with..even though he was a nice guy. a few others who "tolerated" me hanging out with them because i was a friend of a friend.
What kind of school was it?
It was nick-named "Cell block C." does that answer your question? LOL!
seriously, there were bars on the windows, and armed guards at the doors. there were threats of racial riots on a daily basis, & full contact fights broke out in the lunch room every day. scarey place. but my parents didn't have the money to send me to a private school.

What teacher(s) inspired you?
I was inspired to read by a junior high teacher. until then, i didn't read much. He taught speed reading. And i thought that was great! And it was through him i met Stephen King!
Another inspiration was my high school guidance counselor. She really taught me that hard work and dedication to a job can help you succeed...no matter what the job! even if it is just a data entry clerk. she was right!

Were you happy with your school? not really. but it got me where i am today. i was able to take the Regents exams and i got into college.

I'm also adding: Have you gone to any class reunions, and how did it go?
I dont' even know when the reunions are. LOL! so...no. i haven't been to any of my high school reunions.

EDIT: I wanted to add that i was a "goody-goody" in high school....a "sandra dee" if you will. never smoke or drank or went to parties. my dad had his reigns on me...i couldn't go out after 9pm unless shaperoned. so i didn't go. maybe that's part of why i didn't have many friends.

 

[faithmom]

And you led me right to my next question. I think I have ready almost everything Stephen King has written, except maybe in the last year or two....Which of his works are your favorites and why? (note: My DH just doesn't get what I love about a good thriller! LOL!)

 

[marezee]

And you led me right to my next question. I think I have ready almost everything Stephen King has written, except maybe in the last year or two....Which of his works are your favorites and why? (note: My DH just doesn't get what I love about a good thriller! LOL!)

LOL! my grandfather used to say i would burn in you know where for reading stephen king!
I loved his book Cujo about a rabid saint banard. It was in a different perspective...some of it was written from the dog's perspective. very intriguing.
i also liked Salem's Lot. very spooky and a turn-pager! it was the first book i ever read of his also.
But, I would have to say that my very favorites of his were the Gunslinger series. The Roland character was so well thought out and so deep. unlike any other character i've read about. The series was great. set in many different worlds, with many characters.
also, stephen king likes to inter-connect his books by using his characters. he will mention a character from one book in another book and so forth. but you can only catch that if you read all his books!! hehe.

 

[faithmom]

Good books. I've read them all. I think the only one of his I didn't like was Tommyknockers. I'm with you on the Gunslinger series. One of my faves! I also thought The Stand was not his usual style (neither was the Gunslinger!), but amazingly appocolyptic in many ways.

You're grandfather had good intentions I am sure, but there is nothing wrong with reading horror if you have a grip on your own knowledge of Good and Evil. Also Stephen King is pretty black and white on the difference between Good and Evil, and doesn't inspire your desire to be Evil, rather to fight it, or at least survive it LOL! (As we see in many of today's Christian thriller series now).

I also read all of Anne Rice's, but saw a distinct difference between her and Stephen King in that she glamourized Evil and made it appealing to many. I never saw cult fans spring up out of the streets and dress like his characters, like they did with hers. She later saw the error in this herself....that is when she wrote a beautiful novel about Jesus Christ, when she converted back from atheism to Catholic/Christian.

Of course the critics hated it and it flopped on the market. (Very good book if you ever get a chance to read it...completely Biblically based, and not a smidge of a vampire or witch to be found anywhere.)

I'm going to be off for about a week, until then, what other author/series has been a favorite of yours for some time?

 

[marezee]

I loved the Stand too. It was very long though. I really enjoy King's character studies. Tommyknockers was not a fav of mine either. There were other books that were out of his style like "The Girl Who Loved Tom Gordon." About a girl who gets lost in the Maine woods. A page-turner and very interesting...i think i read it in 2 days!

what other author/series has been a favorite of yours for some time?

I enjoyed Marianne Williamson's "A Return to Love."
A Course in Miracles is what drove me to become a Christian.

Thanks faith...hope you had a good week.