I REALLY need your oppionion.

[SonicBOOM]

There's a difference between telling the girl the truth and too much information.

If she asked what your intention was, you could say, "Well, I'm looking for someone I can date seriously for about 2 years and then marry. I would like to be married for 2 more years and then have a child. I would like to have four more children in two year intervals. The cost of child care would probably be high so I would prefer a woman who will stay home with them until they are in school. When the children graduate and we retire, I would like to buy a Winnebago and travel South in the winter."

Or you could say, "Just thought it would be cool to hang out and talk."

ummmm thats why I didn't say this and even if I did that wouldn't be honest. I don't wanna MARRY a girl just because I happen to find her cute.

 

[SonicBOOM]

Her loss Chris.

thanks

 

[GQ Chris]

"Back then girls didn't want me, now I'm hot they all on me"

get that money man.. hahaha

 

[Mrs. Luther073082]

There's a difference between telling the girl the truth and too much information.

If she asked what your intention was, you could say, "Well, I'm looking for someone I can date seriously for about 2 years and then marry. I would like to be married for 2 more years and then have a child. I would like to have four more children in two year intervals. The cost of child care would probably be high so I would prefer a woman who will stay home with them until they are in school. When the children graduate and we retire, I would like to buy a Winnebago and travel South in the winter."

Or you could say, "Just thought it would be cool to hang out and talk."

 

[Tamara224]

ok..... I like this girl at the college groups I attend.... so like the impulsive person I am, I asked her out tonight..... so I will lay the dialog word for word out here and I need you guys to tell me if you think it's a good sign or not. [please be honest].


ok here's how the conversation went.


*she walks up to me*

her: "hey hows it going?"

me: "it's ok how bout yourself"

*we talk for a couple of minutes*

me: "hey? If this ain't completely out of the blue, would you mind getting a bite to eat sometime?"

her: "I dunno.... wh-what are you thinking?"

me: "haha that's a good question.... I'll be blunt. I think your cute and I wanna get to know you a little more"

her: *kind of smiles* "Let me get back to you on that ok?"

me: "sure, ok"


now...... is this a good sign?

IMO: When she asked "what are you thinking", she most likely meant "where do you want to go for a bite" She probably didn't mean "tell me your intentions with regard to me."

But I could be wrong...

Still, it probably put her off a bit when you were "blunt".

I would say that trying again wouldn't be a bad idea, just play it cool. Say something like "so, how about dinner on Friday?"

 

[MrsSeptemberPenguin]

Wait and see what she actually says before you get to upset... it's possible she'll say yes.

 

[deliciousBass]

IMO: When she asked "what are you thinking", she most likely meant "where do you want to go for a bite" She probably didn't mean "tell me your intentions with regard to me."

But I could be wrong...

Still, it probably put her off a bit when you were "blunt".

I would say that trying again wouldn't be a bad idea, just play it cool. Say something like "so, how about dinner on Friday?"

Wow, that's a good observation. I never even thought she could have maybe been asking where they should go...

 

[Tinkerbell33]

Her loss Chris.

Agreed.

 

[atuck00]

Wow, that's a good observation. I never even thought she could have maybe been asking where they should go...

That's funny because I never even thought that could have meant "what are your intentions." I thought maybe she asked him that in some omitted part of the conversation!

 

[SonicBOOM]

well when she asked that she sounded kind of nervious to be honest.... and when I said what I said in reply she sort of smiled and said "let me get back to you".... so I dunno..... when I left the conversation it seemed positive.... but now I dunno.....

 

[Tinkerbell33]

Wow, that's a good observation. I never even thought she could have maybe been asking where they should go...

Well I thought she was asking him where he was planning to take her, I thought that was clear....lol.

 

[Tinkerbell33]

well when she asked that she sounded kind of nervious to be honest.... and when I said what I said in reply she sort of smiled and said "let me get back to you".... so I dunno..... when I left the conversation it seemed positive.... but now I dunno.....

There is no point analysing this, you are just making yourself feel worse, why don't you just wait to see what her answer is first?

 

[atuck00]

well when she asked that she sounded kind of nervious to be honest.... and when I said what I said in reply she sort of smiled and said "let me get back to you".... so I dunno..... when I left the conversation it seemed positive.... but now I dunno.....

Well then be fine thinking positively! You don't know what will happen. We've all over analyzed it and usually when people over analyze things, it settles on the negative and festers like a boil.

 

[Tamara224]

Wow, that's a good observation. I never even thought she could have maybe been asking where they should go...

That's funny because I never even thought that could have meant "what are your intentions." I thought maybe she asked him that in some omitted part of the conversation!

Well I thought she was asking him where he was planning to take her, I thought that was clear....lol.

Ah... Methinks we have encountered a male vs female communication style mishap.

The girls read it one way, the guys read it another...

Chances are, the girls have read it how she meant it, don't ya think?


Chris, don't let it get you down and don't overanalyze it. I think you should go ahead and take the initiative to ask her about it again... this time with a definite plan such as "So, would you like to have dinner at ______ on ____(day)____ at _____ o'clock?"

 

[Tinkerbell33]

Ah... Methinks we have encountered a male vs female communication style mishap.

The girls read it one way, the guys read it another...

Chances are, the girls have read it how she meant it, don't ya think?


Chris, don't let it get you down and don't overanalyze it. I think you should go ahead and take the initiative to ask her about it again... this time with a definite plan such as "So, would you like to have dinner at ______ on ____(day)____ at _____ o'clock?"

Good advice.

 

[Peacemonger]

I think you should go ahead and take the initiative to ask her about it again... this time with a definite plan such as "So, would you like to have dinner at ______ on ____(day)____ at _____ o'clock?"

You're such a lawyer. Do we need two witnesses and a notary public too?


And btw, I don't think it's a guys vs. girls communication style mishap. (see my first couple posts). I read deliciousBass's post "Wow, that's a good observation. I never even thought she could have maybe been asking where they should go..." as complete sarcasm.

 

[Blank123]

well when she asked that she sounded kind of nervious to be honest.... and when I said what I said in reply she sort of smiled and said "let me get back to you".... so I dunno..... when I left the conversation it seemed positive.... but now I dunno.....

i think what it comes down to Chris is you need to stop trying to be a mind reader. The truth is you don't know whats going on in her head, and all any of us can do is guess. the same as you.

 

[Tamara224]

You're such a lawyer. Do we need two witnesses and a notary public too?

Three witnesses and a notary public, I'd say.

And btw, I don't think it's a guys vs. girls communication style mishap. (see my first couple posts). I read deliciousBass's post "Wow, that's a good observation. I never even thought she could have maybe been asking where they should go..." as complete sarcasm.

DB, were you being sarcastic?

 

[SonicBOOM]

i think what it comes down to Chris is you need to stop trying to be a mind reader. The truth is you don't know whats going on in her head, and all any of us can do is guess. the same as you.

yeah I gotta quit obsessing about what I don't know about..... I swear my life would be ten times easier and less stressful if I allowed some unknowns.

 

[faithopelove]

I don't know what's up with this lady, but I think it's a good idea to take a risk and ask out someone who you are interested in. It's good practice for so many areas of life. And many women are attracted to guys who are not afraid to go after what they want. In general I think those who are willing to take risks are very successful in love and in life.