Okay, now, I want to show you why this was wrong of you, okay?
When the individual said such a thing, you should have dealt with the individual, and that should have been that. It never should have entered the discussion here. To do so, in sarcasm, is to assume that ALL white folks are alike.
I agree with the statement that racism MUST contain two elements: judgement based on skin color and power. So, I am not going to say what you said was racist, but it did contain half of the formula.
It would be the same thing as if I randomly told a story about visiting my BLACK friend and said (and yes, we had watermelon)
Do you see how extremely wrong that is when you put it on the other foot?
Please understand, I am not condemning you. We all do it. I am not even sure that we can completely eliminate such generalizations from our vocabulary. But, oh, Lord! Can we at least understand that it is NOT intended with hate behind it?
Can we ALL identify the language that is truly hateful and racist? Can we ALL identify the ACTIONS that are truly hateful and racist?
Did that woman ask in complete ignorance and curiosity or did that woman ask with hate in her heart? That is what I am getting at. If there was no hate there, then, can we start having a little forgiveness?