Causes of Divorce

gottabemore2life

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"Causes of divorce can be quite complex and complicated. There is usually not one simple factor that causes the dissolution of a marriage. Due to the fact that many states no longer require a statement of fault or specific reason for divorce, there are no specific statistics that expressly detail the most common causes of divorce.


Causes of divorce often involve a combination of factors that lead to the breakdown of a marriage. In the United States nearly ninety percent of the population will get married at some time in their lives. Approximately 40 to 50 percent of first time marriages will result in divorce within fifteen years. A number of factors may influence the likelihood of marital dissolution including the quality and length of the premarital relationship, cohabitation, each party''s family of origin, the length of the marriage, and several other factors.


In most general terms, the causes of divorce (and arguably the cause of any relationship dissolution) involve a breakdown or lack of communication, compromise, and/or commitment. Family legal experts cite the following factors as major causes of divorce: poor communication, financial problems, lack of commitment, dramatic changes in priorities, and infidelity. Causes of divorce may also include physical, mental or emotional abuse, substance abuse, lack of conflict resolution skills, unmet needs, failed expectations, and significant discrepancies in parenting.


Causes of divorce may also be predicated on several pre-marital factors. Families of origin often have a large influence over marriage and divorce. People whose parents are divorced are twice as likely to have their own marriage end in divorce. People with divorced parents may be more likely to see divorce as a solution to problems in a marriage or may have a lower threshold for marital conflict. The quality of premarital plutonic relationships with the opposite sex may also give some indication as to the quality of relationships and the ensuing causes of divorce.


Cohabitation is also another factor in the causes of divorce. Studies show that people who live together before they get married are more likely to get divorced. Reasons cited for this phenomenon vary depending on one''s perspective. People who cohabit first do not often take living together as seriously as marriage. Pressure to get married and the increased likelihood of having children while cohabiting can contribute to the causes of divorce in the future.


There are several other factors that are cited as causes of divorce. Generally causes of divorce depend on premarital factors, specific relationship dynamics, personality attributes, and problem behaviors. Anyone who is considering a divorce must discover the causes of divorce for their own marriage, irrespective of what external statistics reveal. If you have examined the causes of your marital dissatisfaction and have decided that the best option in your marriage is divorce, who may want to speak with a family law attorney who can help you through the process. An attorney''s knowledge of divorce laws in your state can help protect and maximize your interests in a divorce case."

http://www.onlinelawyersource.com/divorce/family-law/children/index.html

I couldn't find any concrete statistics because of the no fault clause, but according to this article, and many others, most divorces today have nothing to do with abuse.
 

gottabemore2life

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I suspect with some divorces, maybe one partner was so dedicated to their work (or service outside the family) that they didn't have time for their other partner. Is this plausible?

It's plausible. It wouldn't be under my list of extenuating circumstances though.
 
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gottabemore2life

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"Causes of divorce may also include physical, mental or emotional abuse, substance abuse, lack of conflict resolution skills, unmet needs, failed expectations, and significant discrepancies in parenting."

^It says in the article that abuse can be a factor in divorce^

As a little side note.

And I never said it couldn't. We are merely trying to figure out what the greatest cause for divorce is. It is proving to be rather difficult though.
 
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Fremdin

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Just because it's listed as a side note doesn't make it insignificant. You have to think about what the author's intent was in writing the article. Plus not all abuse is pyschical, most is verbal or emotional. And lots of abuse victims never get the oppurtunity to file for divorce.
 
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ido

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As a little side note.

And I never said it couldn't. We are merely trying to figure out what the greatest cause for divorce is. It is proving to be rather difficult though.
I believe this statement to be true for marriages that are first-time marriages for both partners:

Many marriages today are doomed before they even start. Marriage is no longer seen as a necessary step in a relationship so many couples are quick to divorce without making an honest effort to resolve their problems. Communication breakdown, financial difficulties as well as circumstances of the marriage are all problems that can cause many marriages to fail.*


*taken from http://www.marriageinfocenter.com/

However, when one or both persons have been previously married, the cause is usually related more to one or both persons not completely healing and therefore bringing past hurts into new relationships.

I would venture a guess that this is probably true for more first time marriages as well presently. More people are waiting until they're older to marry, so there is a greater chance that they have had one or more long-term relationships (possibly even living together outside of marriage) which would have caused hurts that they did not heal before moving on to the next relationship.

 
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ido

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But do you really think that abuse is the number one reason for divorce? I have a really hard time believing that.
I don't think it's the number one reason - and I don't think anyone else said that it is. No one is disagreeing with you that divorce is taken too lightly. We are trying to help you understand that even the Bible states acceptable reason for divorce.
 
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ido

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I don't think it's the number one reason - and I don't think anyone else said that it is. No one is disagreeing with you that divorce is taken too lightly. We are trying to help you understand that even the Bible states acceptable reason for divorce.
I just saw your post in the other thread - so yeah, you get what I'm saying - sorry to be redundant.
 
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gottabemore2life

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I don't think it's the number one reason - and I don't think anyone else said that it is. No one is disagreeing with you that divorce is taken too lightly. We are trying to help you understand that even the Bible states acceptable reason for divorce.

And as I have said, on more than one occasion, I understand that.
 
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Fremdin

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I don't think it's the number one reason, but I think that in many cases abuse is a factor. Especially percieved abuse or denied abuse. What would be interesting to know would be the marriage partners' history of abuse before the marriage and the causality of that on divorce. I know that in my parents' divorce abuse was never a stated cause but it was there and both of my parents came from abusive familial relationships.
But I agree with flnativegirl most marriages are doomed from the beginning. Most divorces are probably caused by the old standby of "irreconcilable differences"
 
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gottabemore2life

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I once heard the theroy that some divorces are caused because the couple held to high of hope on marrege and found themselves vastly disappointed. This could defently be the case in the church where we teach marrege like it's a flipping god.

But marriage IS sacred! At least, I think it should be!
 
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