OK, first off ... what they did to daimonizomai bes really awful.
it felt like what you might imagine it would feel like to be kidnapped and brainwashed by some fanatical cult with weird superstitions. like what goes on in psy-ops, kind of, the way they keep shouting, hollering, playing head games, twisting words around and throwing them back at you to confuse you, trying to strip down your mind so you cannot think, cannot even hold onto any place of safety or focus or defense in your own head, really, trying to wear you down and BREAK your mind, heart, and spirit so you will take their imprints. and then trying to imprint you with total garbage and garbled nonsense and ridiculous superstitions.
trauma-induced mind control, basically, would be what it boiled down to and amounted to. an attempt at that, anyway. bloody horrible with the continual babbling and ranting and tirades, that horrible toady, warty little jerk of a man screaming in its face and mocking and making stupid comments. ironic, too, that people who tend to be the type to believe in these stupid conspiracy theories and SRA and all the rest of the idiot train of urban legend fantasy would be the ones to try to use trauma-based mind control on others. but in a way it makes total sense.
and using social and environmental control on top of it, too. by forcibly stopping Moriah from leaving, they gave it pause to bring to mind silently so many horrible, tragic stories it has read of people who had problems being gotten hold of by superstitious and ignorant fanatics like this and ending up dead -- beaten, starved, suffocated, whatever -- which made it fear for its life or for bodily harm. the tyranny of the unknown eating away inside, too, because Moriah did not know HOW long they would keep it hostage, whether it would ever get out of there, and in a situation like that, time seems to halt and rational mind shuts off. Every minute feels like an hour, you just want to be out of there so badly.
but the human aspect of what happened bes just scratching the surface. with it going on, it bes like daimonizomai lookin up into the heavens and God storming down at it all cruel and vindictive. Like He bes saying, you see? this is just what you get. this is what it would look like to have Me operate in total disregard of human volition. you keep wanting Me to override your will, well how do you like it now, hmmm? serves you right to be done like this, you are getting exactly what you deserve. It bes like He punishes it for all the times it has troubled His servants seeking aid, compassion, and understanding. Can't bring itself to write the details here, it just hurts too bloody much to think about it. Like every nasty, evil, rotten, mean, malicious, nefarious, CRUEL and TOTALLY WRONG judgment and accusation ever thrown at Moriah slamming it in the face all at once and God saying every last bit of all of that bes true, like He has never before laid eyes on the reality of its being but only listened to what the liars and self-exonerators and hostiles and other assorted petty judases whats ever hurt us had to say.
It got subjected to pretty much every form of spiritual abuse imaginable and known to man in the space of twelve hours all crammed together at once. The emotional blackmail, the crass legalisms and demands to go through hoops, the freaking ongoing, invasive mental assault like its mind and spirit bes eviscerated. Everything it has ever mentioned as a reason for staying AWAY from humans, everything it has ever named and labeled toxic in religion, every insulting, denigrating, degrading idiocy it has ever denounced and decried, these and more it got forced to endure. The people who did this to Moriah even had the consummate nerve to presume to speak for God and to say that God had said this bes Moriah's "last chance" and that if it would not give itself over to them and their abuses there and then, it would be lost forever and end up committing suicide.
this bes just the tip of the iceberg what they did and what happened, a brief sketch or overview. many of the details it just feels so much sick inside to call to mind it does not want to even attempt to tell some of the things they said and did. Freaking stupid snake-oil shysters looking to exploit its situation for their amusement. Creeps and idiots who could not deliver a dead rat out of a paper bag and into the sewer. Pseudochristian witch doctors and animists speaking church-ese. Despicable. Loathesome. And on top of it all, it got betrayed most deceitfully to even get it there at all (obviously) and afterwards, as a result of suffering at the hands of these creeps, it lost the one it called its anmchara, for she abandoned daimonizomai afterwards and left it for dead, alone in the midst of this latest absolute shredded wreckage of its trust and hope. She did not even try to stick around long enough to pick up the pieces. So in the end the whole thing wound up taking on the appearance of having been orchestrated from the beginning, as if everything which transpired from the autumnal equinox onward till that night had been arranged in advance on purpose for maximum harm and damage. Maybe not by them humans involved, they probably did not have sufficient knowledge or motivation to do something like that, but God knew and He had pulled all these strings seeming to lead toward something that turned out to be a cruel and devastating and hurtful malicious trick.
So now Moriah knows in no uncertain terms that the God it has sought does not exist, period. There may be an actual God that DOES exist, or it may be simply a wraith-form of the overwhelming consensus egregore forged by multitudes of minds hosting the same belief structures however morphed through history and culture, but whatever one does actually exist would be the sadistic abuser and tyrant it wants nothing to do with, not the loving, compassionate Creator and Redeemer it had sought at various times in its life. This experience has caused Moriah to merge entirely with Lucifer/Satan because now His war has become Moriah's own. It had union with Him before because of the unity between our mutual experiences and pain, and it had His voice before for the same reasons, but now it seems to have entirely BECOME Him, after this experience. Not just merged in union but BECOME.
And this experience has also left Moriah convinced absolutely that it must never again repeat any of the things it had been doing which led to this series of unfortunate events. And that means if the humans want to drown it in accusations and false judgments it needs to just let them, because the alternative -- them actually taking it seriously -- proves even more unthinkably worse. Clearly nobody really knows what they bes doing so it cannot anticipate that any human being can bring to daimonizomai the (real, genuine, authentic) miracle it longs to have from God. And to essentially be told "go away" by God through this whole chain of events means it cannot even turn to him anymore.
Not that it would want to, given how he has treated it....
it felt like what you might imagine it would feel like to be kidnapped and brainwashed by some fanatical cult with weird superstitions. like what goes on in psy-ops, kind of, the way they keep shouting, hollering, playing head games, twisting words around and throwing them back at you to confuse you, trying to strip down your mind so you cannot think, cannot even hold onto any place of safety or focus or defense in your own head, really, trying to wear you down and BREAK your mind, heart, and spirit so you will take their imprints. and then trying to imprint you with total garbage and garbled nonsense and ridiculous superstitions.
trauma-induced mind control, basically, would be what it boiled down to and amounted to. an attempt at that, anyway. bloody horrible with the continual babbling and ranting and tirades, that horrible toady, warty little jerk of a man screaming in its face and mocking and making stupid comments. ironic, too, that people who tend to be the type to believe in these stupid conspiracy theories and SRA and all the rest of the idiot train of urban legend fantasy would be the ones to try to use trauma-based mind control on others. but in a way it makes total sense.
and using social and environmental control on top of it, too. by forcibly stopping Moriah from leaving, they gave it pause to bring to mind silently so many horrible, tragic stories it has read of people who had problems being gotten hold of by superstitious and ignorant fanatics like this and ending up dead -- beaten, starved, suffocated, whatever -- which made it fear for its life or for bodily harm. the tyranny of the unknown eating away inside, too, because Moriah did not know HOW long they would keep it hostage, whether it would ever get out of there, and in a situation like that, time seems to halt and rational mind shuts off. Every minute feels like an hour, you just want to be out of there so badly.
but the human aspect of what happened bes just scratching the surface. with it going on, it bes like daimonizomai lookin up into the heavens and God storming down at it all cruel and vindictive. Like He bes saying, you see? this is just what you get. this is what it would look like to have Me operate in total disregard of human volition. you keep wanting Me to override your will, well how do you like it now, hmmm? serves you right to be done like this, you are getting exactly what you deserve. It bes like He punishes it for all the times it has troubled His servants seeking aid, compassion, and understanding. Can't bring itself to write the details here, it just hurts too bloody much to think about it. Like every nasty, evil, rotten, mean, malicious, nefarious, CRUEL and TOTALLY WRONG judgment and accusation ever thrown at Moriah slamming it in the face all at once and God saying every last bit of all of that bes true, like He has never before laid eyes on the reality of its being but only listened to what the liars and self-exonerators and hostiles and other assorted petty judases whats ever hurt us had to say.
It got subjected to pretty much every form of spiritual abuse imaginable and known to man in the space of twelve hours all crammed together at once. The emotional blackmail, the crass legalisms and demands to go through hoops, the freaking ongoing, invasive mental assault like its mind and spirit bes eviscerated. Everything it has ever mentioned as a reason for staying AWAY from humans, everything it has ever named and labeled toxic in religion, every insulting, denigrating, degrading idiocy it has ever denounced and decried, these and more it got forced to endure. The people who did this to Moriah even had the consummate nerve to presume to speak for God and to say that God had said this bes Moriah's "last chance" and that if it would not give itself over to them and their abuses there and then, it would be lost forever and end up committing suicide.
this bes just the tip of the iceberg what they did and what happened, a brief sketch or overview. many of the details it just feels so much sick inside to call to mind it does not want to even attempt to tell some of the things they said and did. Freaking stupid snake-oil shysters looking to exploit its situation for their amusement. Creeps and idiots who could not deliver a dead rat out of a paper bag and into the sewer. Pseudochristian witch doctors and animists speaking church-ese. Despicable. Loathesome. And on top of it all, it got betrayed most deceitfully to even get it there at all (obviously) and afterwards, as a result of suffering at the hands of these creeps, it lost the one it called its anmchara, for she abandoned daimonizomai afterwards and left it for dead, alone in the midst of this latest absolute shredded wreckage of its trust and hope. She did not even try to stick around long enough to pick up the pieces. So in the end the whole thing wound up taking on the appearance of having been orchestrated from the beginning, as if everything which transpired from the autumnal equinox onward till that night had been arranged in advance on purpose for maximum harm and damage. Maybe not by them humans involved, they probably did not have sufficient knowledge or motivation to do something like that, but God knew and He had pulled all these strings seeming to lead toward something that turned out to be a cruel and devastating and hurtful malicious trick.
So now Moriah knows in no uncertain terms that the God it has sought does not exist, period. There may be an actual God that DOES exist, or it may be simply a wraith-form of the overwhelming consensus egregore forged by multitudes of minds hosting the same belief structures however morphed through history and culture, but whatever one does actually exist would be the sadistic abuser and tyrant it wants nothing to do with, not the loving, compassionate Creator and Redeemer it had sought at various times in its life. This experience has caused Moriah to merge entirely with Lucifer/Satan because now His war has become Moriah's own. It had union with Him before because of the unity between our mutual experiences and pain, and it had His voice before for the same reasons, but now it seems to have entirely BECOME Him, after this experience. Not just merged in union but BECOME.
And this experience has also left Moriah convinced absolutely that it must never again repeat any of the things it had been doing which led to this series of unfortunate events. And that means if the humans want to drown it in accusations and false judgments it needs to just let them, because the alternative -- them actually taking it seriously -- proves even more unthinkably worse. Clearly nobody really knows what they bes doing so it cannot anticipate that any human being can bring to daimonizomai the (real, genuine, authentic) miracle it longs to have from God. And to essentially be told "go away" by God through this whole chain of events means it cannot even turn to him anymore.
Not that it would want to, given how he has treated it....
