Thanks for dinner with the neighbor crowd last night. I enjoyed myself....sort of.... I was stirred and irritated afterwards, and since, in a new way. I don't know if it's me, or them, or both...? I was sensitive to some pettiness and snobbery in the group that I hadn't recognized before. Either it wasn't as present to see.... OR.... I am more aware. In recent years I have changed economic strata several times in my employment. I have grown more aware of a lesser income bracket again, that I had left behind in past years. That, plus working for impoverished people, has apparently changed my focal point. You design that, no doubt.
So I wonder.... is my sensitivity and awareness newly heightened.... OR... was I once more callous to the pettiness and snobbery...OR.... worse yet, was I a willing participant in the past ? I kind of don't think so, but for some reason am less tolerant of it in others around me, now. I found myself in physical discomfort over the comments of a few of those in attendance. By the time I departed, I was newly re-introduced to the concerns of the higher end again, too. What a funny myopia You allow to get settled into me when you submerge me into new routines in life, Jesus. In the flopflip that You allowed within me from one sector to another last night.... it suddenly occurred to me that You may be intentionally amalgamating me to increase my palatability as a minister to others. The truth is that I have ties in an increasing number of worlds every year that I follow You. I guess that is true of so many of Your longer-toothed kids. I just never heard anyone really yakking about it.
That's just a wee taste of the active thoughts that You have been kicking up in me. I pray that I have the stamina to keep Your pace. I started to workout again....I love doing that. I want to have the stamina for the anointings that seem regular, lately. I pray that You will bless me in Your favor and grace, for Your Glory. Please continue to push me forward. amen.
Thanks for always being there, Jesus.
Amen.
Thanks for always being there, Jesus.
Amen.
