I never bought the "must drive the car first" argument on dating and sex.
A woman I dated in my mid-20s, a non-virgin but limited experience Pentecostalist, once asked me if I was "one of those guys who wants a test drive."
Nope, told her.
We remained platonic those 3-4 mos. we dated.
Sounded like other guys, "Christian" men, pressured her.
Never gained romantic feelings for her and couldn't see it going anywhere.
When I broke it off, one of the rare times I ever broke a relationship up (usually, "Christian" women were the ones that broke my heart:o), she "offered" herself to me if I'd stay....
Said thanks and appreciate the tempting offer, but....
Though she was an attractive blonde most guys would've been happy with, couldn't see having sex with someone I didn't have feelings for.
Sure, I could've made love with her, but though she'd had some sex with another guy, didn't want to harm her Christian morality.
Wasn't such a "strong" Christian then as I had been in college, but still.... I knew that wouldn't be good and after 2 casuals I'd had the year before her.... didn't want that regret.
Turned-down an offer from another non-virgin never-married Christian woman a year later that I dated for 1.5 yrs.
Though she was in her mid-30s (I was 27), she was conflicted about it so didn't wanna go all the way, which I understood.
And I didn't press her, though I wanted her.
However, didn't mean we didn't do "other things" short of intercourse
, which I now regret.
One night, she told me she wanted me.
But like a fool, and knowing her stance and afraid of what she'd think of me ("some 'Christian' you are... look what you did" -- honestly, I saw us getting married) and afraid she'd had too much wine... I questioned her.
See what a great "gentleman" I was?
Even when "invited", I wouldn't accept.
I hope those women appreciate how I treated them... and hope God saw my actions... and caution about sinning...
Really... I did feel a lot of guilt... but still wanted a woman's sexual love.....
Here I was... a "dating loser" for most my 20s.... and women OFFERED themselves to me...
Am sure many guys wouldn't have hesitated...