I get mad and tempted

[dabro]

Okay on another forum....A secular forum I let the devil have a foot hold.....Any way...My mood was crushing and closing in like walls.....I take gabapentin for mood but I know from the past that if I take a little more than suppose to it will lift me out of the depression....I really had nothing to be depressed or mad about.....I just let things get to me.......I feel like I'm getting closer to God everyday......and, I just feel like I'm not worth any of the work God has done.....Why bother with someone who never passed HS or even went to go get his GED. I'm on SSDI for things that happened in 05.....Please don't tell me to stop my meds if I do that it could hurt me more without a doctors supervision......I wanted to be a preacher.....One that God used as a vessel to touch lives.....Mission work is what I wanted to do but, I HAD BIG DREAMS. I don't feel that anymore.....




All it's about is why I go thru this and that.....? What is the point of all these trials.....Why God.....I think we all get frustrated as some point......But man, this has seemed to just go on and on.....I'm just mad when I stumble because I know in the past I have gotten thru the depression even tho it hurt I made it to the next day God willing.




I just want to be free from this space suit that is filled with so much warped illnesses........A body that has fallen.....

 

[lightandglory]

Brother i will keep you in my prayers. I will suggest you to go to 21 days fasting get away from stresses and ask God what you can do for him. Call upon his presence. In his presence there is peace and there is rest. If God wouldn't think that you are good enough you wouldn't be here nor even know about him. God has a purpose for you brother. Its not about us. Its all about him. Its not what we want, its what He wants from us. Just pray for God to talk to you and show you what you can do him. Keep up your faith brother. God loves you. Sometimes God is talking to us b ut we dont hear because we are too busy about complaining about our issues. And trials just leads us to grow more spiritually. God wants to discipline us through this trials. He has a plan for you brother, Just have faith in him and keep praising May God Bless you. Don't forget he loves yo so much.