JewelInHisCrown
Contributor
I'm torn because I love my in-laws but not to pieces. I love my husband to pieces. They are more than just okay. So I voted for they don't get in my way.
Upvote
0
-
Starting today August 7th, 2024, in order to post in the Married Couples, Courting Couples, or Singles forums, you will not be allowed to post if you have your Marital status designated as private. Announcements will be made in the respective forums as well but please note that if yours is currently listed as Private, you will need to submit a ticket in the Support Area to have yours changed.
your In Laws
- Thread starter SweetBella
- Start date
searle29678
Wife, Daughter, Sister, and Friend
- Dec 14, 2004
- 2,566
- 201
- 43
- Faith
- Christian
- Marital Status
- Married
- Politics
- US-Republican
My in-laws have taken me in as a part of the family from the first time they met me. They are so willing to help us out and they are just really great people, each in their own way.
Of course they get on my nerves sometimes, but that is family for you.
Of course they get on my nerves sometimes, but that is family for you.
Upvote
0
PastorMikeJ
combat veteran
- Nov 10, 2005
- 2,426
- 237
- 80
- Faith
- Word of Faith
- Marital Status
- Married
- Politics
- US-Others
Loved them as much as if they were my parents...both sets...but now they are walking with the Lord..
Upvote
0
christalee4
Senior Veteran
I chose "other" because my feelings for my MIL are above "okay" and a bit below loving to pieces.
My FIL passed away about 10 years ago - I wish I would have been able to know him.
My MIL had to make an adjustment to accept me. She had grown used to having her son at her disposal, and I think she felt a bit put out in the beginning. Now she is quite affectionate with me, and is also in the habit of telling both her son and me, "I love you", whereas before she wasn't very free with her affection. She had had a hard life; she and her sisters were sent to an orphanage at a young age. She's becoming forgetful and somewhat moody now, can be occasionally selfish and demanding, but that's old age. I try to humor her as much as possible when we get together, and she loves to share laughs.
My FIL passed away about 10 years ago - I wish I would have been able to know him.
My MIL had to make an adjustment to accept me. She had grown used to having her son at her disposal, and I think she felt a bit put out in the beginning. Now she is quite affectionate with me, and is also in the habit of telling both her son and me, "I love you", whereas before she wasn't very free with her affection. She had had a hard life; she and her sisters were sent to an orphanage at a young age. She's becoming forgetful and somewhat moody now, can be occasionally selfish and demanding, but that's old age. I try to humor her as much as possible when we get together, and she loves to share laughs.
Upvote
0
They are basic good people and I like them. We visit a lot. But sometimes they annoy me.... like how they always think it is funny to stuff my toddler full of anything unhealthy they can find. We try to keep our diet better than empty sugars and stuff, but somehow they think that is funny.
Another thing is how they think they are funny because they don't plan. They make jokes about it, but I can't tell you how many times we sit around wondering what we are going to do for this holiday or the next, then we finally make plans and THEN the day before they will end up with plans the same day for the family.
Then there is the issue with this house. They bought this house to fix up and then resell. They asked us if we wanted to buy it for a certain price, and we did. It only got half fixed up and ended up costing us 15,000 more than the original price..... they say it will still get fixed up eventually, but for now we live in half of the house only. This is related to the not planning thing because they will not EVER say "Hey lets plan to work on the house on Saturday." Nono.... they wait until 8am that morning, and THEN call us. So we either have to wait around to see if he is going to feel like it, or if we make plans then we miss the opportunity. Its difficult.
Wow what a nice vent.... get it all out huh....
Another thing is how they think they are funny because they don't plan. They make jokes about it, but I can't tell you how many times we sit around wondering what we are going to do for this holiday or the next, then we finally make plans and THEN the day before they will end up with plans the same day for the family.
Then there is the issue with this house. They bought this house to fix up and then resell. They asked us if we wanted to buy it for a certain price, and we did. It only got half fixed up and ended up costing us 15,000 more than the original price..... they say it will still get fixed up eventually, but for now we live in half of the house only. This is related to the not planning thing because they will not EVER say "Hey lets plan to work on the house on Saturday." Nono.... they wait until 8am that morning, and THEN call us. So we either have to wait around to see if he is going to feel like it, or if we make plans then we miss the opportunity. Its difficult.
Wow what a nice vent.... get it all out huh....
Upvote
0
ChristyLover
Active Member
I love my in laws. I am very blessed to have christian in laws that raised my wife in the Lord. I love them to death and plan to reitire as close to them as I can. We may end up being neighbors!!
Upvote
0
HeyHomie
Senior Veteran
- Jul 8, 2005
- 3,015
- 236
- 55
- Faith
- Non-Denom
- Marital Status
- Married
- Politics
- US-Republican
I voted Other. My in-laws are divorced and my feelings for each are completely different.
I love my mother-in-law to pieces.
I barely know my father-in-law. He's a personable guy and all, but talking to him is like talking to a brick wall. He's a very shy and quiet man who would prefer, all things considered, to spend the rest of his life sitting in his easy chair watching NASCAR and not being bothered by anyone.
I love my mother-in-law to pieces.
I barely know my father-in-law. He's a personable guy and all, but talking to him is like talking to a brick wall. He's a very shy and quiet man who would prefer, all things considered, to spend the rest of his life sitting in his easy chair watching NASCAR and not being bothered by anyone.
Upvote
0
oliveplants
Senior Veteran
OY!
My MIL tried to ruin us. She did succeed in taking away my stepson; kept him for 2 years, then said she wanted DH to have him back, but before we could get the car packed to drive up there (10 hrs), she called the birth mother and let her have him.
They won't call or visit - we have to do all that, but when we are there they fawn over the children and say how they miss us and wish they could see us more.
My brother in law isn't bad, but he chews tobacco - in my parents' house!
My future sisters in law seem nice enough.
My MIL tried to ruin us. She did succeed in taking away my stepson; kept him for 2 years, then said she wanted DH to have him back, but before we could get the car packed to drive up there (10 hrs), she called the birth mother and let her have him.
They won't call or visit - we have to do all that, but when we are there they fawn over the children and say how they miss us and wish they could see us more.
My brother in law isn't bad, but he chews tobacco - in my parents' house!
My future sisters in law seem nice enough.
Upvote
0
I had a hard time between "they drive you crazy" and "they frustrate you and make you fume a little!!!" I ended up picking that they drive me crazy. I would have picked the second one except they don't make me fume a little, they make me fume a lot!!! I still call both of them Mr ____ and Mrs.____, although I am working on calling them by their first names.
To be honest, my FIL is OK. I don't love him or consider him a second father but I don't mind seeing him. My MIL is another story. I really, really wish things were different. It truly makes me sad and I pray for both of them, their health, marriage, job, etc. daily. I'm hoping that by doing that my attitude toward them, and especially my MIL, would change.
To be honest, my FIL is OK. I don't love him or consider him a second father but I don't mind seeing him. My MIL is another story. I really, really wish things were different. It truly makes me sad and I pray for both of them, their health, marriage, job, etc. daily. I'm hoping that by doing that my attitude toward them, and especially my MIL, would change.
Upvote
0
I adore my in-laws and all of hubby's extended family. I actually like them a lot more than my own...and feel a little guilty about that.
Upvote
0
WWJDT
Active Member
- Jan 9, 2006
- 177
- 15
- 51
- Faith
- Christian
- Marital Status
- Married
- Politics
- US-Democrat
My FIL has passed away but he was okay to be around. He was sick about the whole time I knew him so he was pretty miserable. Now my MIL is a different story...my husband doesn't even get along with her. She's a couple of french fries short of a Happy Meal.
Upvote
0
I asked my hubby what he thinks of my parents.
He likes my mum because she makes him lemon meringue pie, my mum likes my hubby and she's very annoyed that she can't find any fault with him.
He likes my dad as well though he gets a bit annoyed that my dad pats him on the head everytime they meet, my dad is 6'6'' and my husand is 5'6'', he likes to chat about computers with dad so they have something in common.
He likes my mum because she makes him lemon meringue pie, my mum likes my hubby and she's very annoyed that she can't find any fault with him.
He likes my dad as well though he gets a bit annoyed that my dad pats him on the head everytime they meet, my dad is 6'6'' and my husand is 5'6'', he likes to chat about computers with dad so they have something in common.
Upvote
0
AngylBelle
#1 Cheesehead!!!
- Jan 23, 2004
- 5,492
- 193
- Faith
- Christian Seeker
- Marital Status
- Married
- Politics
- US-Others
Upvote
0
LynnMcG
A reflection of the Son
- Sep 20, 2004
- 4,171
- 297
- 58
- Faith
- Christian
- Marital Status
- Married
- Politics
- US-Republican
I voted other. My MIL passed away when my husband was 15. My FIL passed away the year before we were married. I adored him. I tease my husband that I only married him for his father. If he turns out half as great as my FIL, he'll be alright.
Upvote
0
MaraPetra
WARNING! Uncoated observations dispensed here.
- Dec 12, 2005
- 3,964
- 824
- 52
- Faith
- Charismatic
- Marital Status
- Married
- Politics
- US-Republican
I fume a little with them.
Actually, I fume a LOT with them.
My MIL has the guilt trips, drama and exaggeration down to a fine art; her idea of "love" is more co-dependence than anything else. Unfortunately, she blessed her children with the same sort of conditional upbringing. It's been a challenge for hubby and I to break beyond that stereotype and actually have a healthy marriage.
She has an active dislike of me, and that's okay in a lot of ways. She tries to hide it, but it shows in so many things. I used to think that she didn't consider me good enough for her son...Upon retrospect, I think it's more that I don't play emotional blackmail games, and I prefer to call a spade a spade. She doesn't like being forthright, and I value that quality.
My FIL is okay...He just doesn't know how to deal with me, because I'm not the emotional type, and I don't depend on drama to make my point.
At any rate, I just try to be as polite as possible, and not rock the boat unless they rock it first.
Actually, I fume a LOT with them.
My MIL has the guilt trips, drama and exaggeration down to a fine art; her idea of "love" is more co-dependence than anything else. Unfortunately, she blessed her children with the same sort of conditional upbringing. It's been a challenge for hubby and I to break beyond that stereotype and actually have a healthy marriage.
She has an active dislike of me, and that's okay in a lot of ways. She tries to hide it, but it shows in so many things. I used to think that she didn't consider me good enough for her son...Upon retrospect, I think it's more that I don't play emotional blackmail games, and I prefer to call a spade a spade. She doesn't like being forthright, and I value that quality.
My FIL is okay...He just doesn't know how to deal with me, because I'm not the emotional type, and I don't depend on drama to make my point.
At any rate, I just try to be as polite as possible, and not rock the boat unless they rock it first.
Upvote
0
It's taken awhile and I'm still not where I need to be with my MIL but I've learned I can't change her and all I can do is accept her for who she is. That means taking the good with the bad. My struggle is concentrating on the good when the bad just gets under my skin. My FIL on the other hand is one of the best men I have ever met in my life.
Upvote
0
E
EmSchmem
Guest
My in laws drive me batty. My MIL needs a million instructions on even the simplest thing about Levi and my FIL scares him. He does this creepy voice and Levi screams and screams. Then when he has him really scared he makes fun of him for being scared. It evidently happened last ngiht while we were out for Valentine's Day. My MIL excused it saying my FIL just thinks he's playing with him and there's nothing wrong with it. She said that Levi screamed and screamed for an hour clinging to her. AND THERE'S NOTHING WRONG WITH WHAT HE'S DOING!?!?!?!?!
I used to think that they were mean and I have recently come to the conclusion that they are just really really UN bright.
I used to think that they were mean and I have recently come to the conclusion that they are just really really UN bright.
Upvote
0
BlondieLashes
Finally a butterfly...
- Aug 1, 2005
- 3,574
- 171
- Faith
- Christian
- Marital Status
- Married
Most of the time I love them....sometimes they bug! My father-in-law is very sweet and easy to understand. He is former military (navy) and very direct and says what he is thinking. I love him to pieces! He is cranky and bossy at times, but at 76 who wouldn't be?! He loves me like a daughter.
My mother-in-law is a piece of work. I really, truly do love her very much and she is really good to us. Sometimes though she is just a bit too nosey and pushy. Her personality and mine are so opposite that I don't know how to handle her most of the time. She is very loud and dramatic about EVERYTHING. She is also inappropriate very often with her language and off-color jokes which at first didn't get under my skin too much but now it makes me crazy! Even though we have talked to her about it she still continues! The other day while my hubby was at work she sent him an e-mail that contained a picture of a nude woman! It was part of some sort of joke she was sending, but come on! We've asked her repeatedly to not do this sort of thing, but she just doesn't get it! She not only embarassed my hubby but could have got him fired! On the flip side she is always there for us if we need anything...
My mother-in-law is a piece of work. I really, truly do love her very much and she is really good to us. Sometimes though she is just a bit too nosey and pushy. Her personality and mine are so opposite that I don't know how to handle her most of the time. She is very loud and dramatic about EVERYTHING. She is also inappropriate very often with her language and off-color jokes which at first didn't get under my skin too much but now it makes me crazy! Even though we have talked to her about it she still continues! The other day while my hubby was at work she sent him an e-mail that contained a picture of a nude woman! It was part of some sort of joke she was sending, but come on! We've asked her repeatedly to not do this sort of thing, but she just doesn't get it! She not only embarassed my hubby but could have got him fired! On the flip side she is always there for us if we need anything...
Upvote
0
Missing
Senior Member
I chose I really don't like them but deal, but that really only applies to my FIL and his wife. My husbands parents divorced when he was a preteen or so and they both moved on and remarried. A year before I met my husband, his mom passed away so I never got to meet her. Ironically, based on what I have heard from my husband and other family members, I think we would have been fast friends.
Anyway, my FIL acts more like a child than I did when I WAS a child! He won't call people, but complains that his children don't call enough. He complains his children don't visit enough, but he never visits us. He's especially irritated when we spend time 'too much' time with the MIL side of the family as they never really liked him when he was married to my MIL.
I moved down there (DH's home state) about 2 months before we got married to try to find a job, yet they didn't even bother coming to meet me. The wedding was in my home town(where we now live)....they went but they didn't bother to meet me until the evening before the wedding....they found it more important to go yardsale shopping the moment they got into town. I later found out that when my husband told my FIL he was getting married, his first reaction was "is she pregnant?" and the day of the wedding, not too long before the wedding, he told my husband "you know you don't have to go through with it, right?". This basically set the tone with my relationship with my FIL and his wife.
My FIL has since said that I am the best thing that ever happened to his son, but that wasn't until about 6 or 7 years into our marriage and everytime he talked to my husband for the first few years of our marriage was to give my husband head trips about some way in which he felt my DH was ruining his life. He wanted to live his dreams though my husband and my husband had different dreams. Now that my husband makes more per year than my FIL ever made, he no longer harps on that stuff....but it took quite a few years of dealing with him playing head games with my husband and my husband telling him off/hanging up the phone on him several times before we got to this point.
So now we don't see him that often and when we do we just put up with it.
My SILs (3 of them)-- I get along with pretty well but I wouldn't say I have bonded greatly with any of them; however, when we all get together we get along pretty well. My one BIL (mothers side, adopted out when MIL was a teen and recently found) is okay (nothing really in common with him) but his wife is quite annoying (passive agressive, manipulative, very needy) and we are glad we live a good 8 or 9 hours away.
I wish we could see my SILs and their families more, but we are all really busy and we all live in different states.
Anyway, my FIL acts more like a child than I did when I WAS a child! He won't call people, but complains that his children don't call enough. He complains his children don't visit enough, but he never visits us. He's especially irritated when we spend time 'too much' time with the MIL side of the family as they never really liked him when he was married to my MIL.
I moved down there (DH's home state) about 2 months before we got married to try to find a job, yet they didn't even bother coming to meet me. The wedding was in my home town(where we now live)....they went but they didn't bother to meet me until the evening before the wedding....they found it more important to go yardsale shopping the moment they got into town. I later found out that when my husband told my FIL he was getting married, his first reaction was "is she pregnant?" and the day of the wedding, not too long before the wedding, he told my husband "you know you don't have to go through with it, right?". This basically set the tone with my relationship with my FIL and his wife.
My FIL has since said that I am the best thing that ever happened to his son, but that wasn't until about 6 or 7 years into our marriage and everytime he talked to my husband for the first few years of our marriage was to give my husband head trips about some way in which he felt my DH was ruining his life. He wanted to live his dreams though my husband and my husband had different dreams. Now that my husband makes more per year than my FIL ever made, he no longer harps on that stuff....but it took quite a few years of dealing with him playing head games with my husband and my husband telling him off/hanging up the phone on him several times before we got to this point.
So now we don't see him that often and when we do we just put up with it.
My SILs (3 of them)-- I get along with pretty well but I wouldn't say I have bonded greatly with any of them; however, when we all get together we get along pretty well. My one BIL (mothers side, adopted out when MIL was a teen and recently found) is okay (nothing really in common with him) but his wife is quite annoying (passive agressive, manipulative, very needy) and we are glad we live a good 8 or 9 hours away.
I wish we could see my SILs and their families more, but we are all really busy and we all live in different states.
Upvote
0
Similar threads
