young

[ChristInAction]

Hi, I havent really been on this board before but I need to let this out, talk to someone & I cant do that here.


I was molested & raped by my uncle when I was 2-4years old.
I remember being in his shed & it happening, more then once. Then when he was at our place I was so scared of him & tryed to hide as soon as he got there, but it didnt work.

It stoped b'coz mum wouldnt let him come back, (He was really rude & mean to my brother who is disabled) but she never knew about what he did to me.

I never really knew what happened & tryed to push it away in my mind b'coz I felt like it was my fault & I was naughty to let it happen. Now I'm older & I know about that stuff & I know people who it happened to, its been hurting so much. I'm durty, discusiting. Why should any guy ever love me? Why would God ever love me?

I'm sorry. xox

 

[restlesslilly]

What happened was definitely NOT your fault. Please, tell your mom and ask for some counseling. They can help you feel better about yourself and realize what a beautiful young woman you are. It will be hard, but you have to make that first step of letting someone know. If your family won't believe you, then go to another trusted adult..like your school counselor or nurse. You are not alone in feeling that way and it is not your fault so please don't let anyone tell you differently. God loves you and wants you to love yourself and become the great woman you're meant to be. Pray for strength. God Bless and please take care.

 

[BigToe]

What happened to you does not make you dirty or disgusting. It makes your uncle scum that he would do that to you. I am really sorry you've gone through such a thing, no one should ever experience that, let alone from a family member.

Do you have any adults you trust you can talk to about this? A counselor or a minister or something? If you don't feel comfortable telling your parents, could you tell them you would like to talk to a therapist? This is a big big thing and you shouldn't have to carry that burden alone.

And this won't stop people from loving you or mean that you won't find a man who loves you.

And you did nothing wrong so why would God not love you over this? There isn't anything we can do to deserve His love, God has chosen to love us. No matter what. That you've been through such a horrible thing breaks his heart, it doesn't make him stop loving you.

 

[Thysine]

As these people tell you, don't blame yourself. You're not disgusting. It's his fault it happened. Don't blame his mistakes on yourself. I have several friends who've been raped. I love them because they're my friends. An unwilling decision is something I wouldn't despise them for. Just know that God and your friends will love you no matter what, and if any guy was willing enough to listen and take time to care, he would love you too.

 

[Futuwwa]

I'm durty, discusiting. Why should any guy ever love me?

Dear, don't worry. Most of us guys do realize that chastity matters infinitely more than physical virginity. If some guy holds what has happened against you, well, he'd be of a type you don't want to be together with anyway.

 

[goldenviolet]

bless your heart you aren't dirty sweet one. i agree you should tell mom. if it's hard; maybe you could write it out, or ask the youth pastor, or lady leadership to help you talk to your mom. pray for courage hun. you need to have support so you can work this all out and heal from feeling like it's your fault. it's deffinatly always the abuser's fault. always. ~ love dee

 

[Johnnz]

Most women I know who have been sexually assaulted as children feel very bad about themselves. It is a horrible result of abuse.

Getting someone suitable to talk and pray over that will be helpful. You have lots of good life to live out yet.

John
NZ