Yet another "new visitor" post

[oceansmile]

Sorry for creating two new threads in two days, but that happens sometimes, I guess.

I am seriously contemplating visiting one of the (numerous) TEC churches this weekend. It turns out I am moving soon so the lack of more conservative Anglican churches here hopefully won't be an issue anymore - and I'd like to make the jump from the UMC before as opposed to after. So, TEC it is for now.

But I am very intimidated by - everything. The local churches all seem very liturgical (at least from their websites) and I am wary of my ability to figure out what's going on and not look stupid. So...with regards to standing, sitting, kneeling, etc - is it pretty easy to quickly figure out what's appropriate? Anything else I would want to know in order to not stick out? I realize I'll look like a visitor regardless but don't want all eye on me because I do something "wrong". I've never been to any new church alone, so help me feel comfortable!

ETA: Also, communion. One of the not so local local Anglican churches requires you to be confirmed. Is this typical? I skipped it when I visited the AMiA church a while back, but I'd prefer not to forever.

 

[black coffee]

good luck! new churches can be a daunting experience. take heart, there are still conservative parishes in TEC if that is a concern. good luck, and it's not a far jump from umc if your church was a little liturgial.

 

[AlexBP]

Regarding the sitting, standing, kneeling issue, just follow the crowd and you'll be fine. My recommendation would be to show up ten minutes early or so. Ideally there would be an usher waiting outside or in the foyer who can answer any questions you have. Just explain that you're a newcomer and everyone should be welcoming.

 

[gord44]

I went to an Anglican service for the first time a few years ago and was nervous too. In the end it wasn't a big deal. It's pretty easy to follow along. The bulletins usually list all the readings and from what book. Sit in the back and just follow along.

 

[seeking_perfection]

Hi oceansmile!

As others have said, it shouldn't be too difficult. Get there early, pick up the paperwork and follow everyone else. Sit a good few pews back and then you'll have people to watch in front of you

 

[seeking.IAM]

I followed this same path a few years ago...moving from a lifetime in the UMC to The Episcopal Church. You have already been given the best advice. Do not sit too far forward. Take a seat where there are worshipers in front of you to see. You may do what they do if you wish, or if you are uncomfortable you can do nothing at all until you are ready.

One nice thing for me was that the same thing pretty much happens every Sunday, so you can catch on pretty fast. This is different from my former UMC which every Sunday seemed to be to see how creative and different you can worship from last week.

I do not know your age. However, if you are older your experience may be like mine. I find my high church Episcopal worship more like the UMC of my youth than the UMC I left.

But by all means, come and see! Perhaps you'll fall in love as I did. Looking back, I kick myself for waiting so long.

 

[oceansmile]

I generally do sit in the back,but usually so people can't see me, not so I can see them. I guess it works both ways.

The UMC of my youth (I am 31) wasn't very liturgical, in fact, it was like the "creative UMC", and the one I attend now is (so yes, it's rather odd that I'd want to try TEC, but you're called where you're called, I guess).

I do have a question about the "liberalism" though - if you're much more conservative, are you considered a pariah? I'm thinking of Facebook, where if you so much as look like you believe marriage is only between a man and a woman, you're attacked. Obviously I don't go around talking about it, but if you're asked, and express an opinion against gay clergy and such, are you run out?

And communion is ok for baptized Christians? Don't have to be confirmed?

 

[ebia]

I generally do sit in the back,but usually so people can't see me, not so I can see them. I guess it works both ways.

The UMC of my youth (I am 31) wasn't very liturgical, in fact, it was like the "creative UMC", and the one I attend now is (so yes, it's rather odd that I'd want to try TEC, but you're called where you're called, I guess).

I do have a question about the "liberalism" though - if you're much more conservative, are you considered a pariah? I'm thinking of Facebook, where if you so much as look like you believe marriage is only between a man and a woman, you're attacked. Obviously I don't go around talking about it, but if you're asked, and express an opinion against gay clergy and such, are you run out?

And communion is ok for baptized Christians? Don't have to be confirmed?

Generally the rule is that all baptised are welcomed to commune as visitors, but those making their home there should get confirmed.

 

[Sean611]

I generally do sit in the back,but usually so people can't see me, not so I can see them. I guess it works both ways.

The UMC of my youth (I am 31) wasn't very liturgical, in fact, it was like the "creative UMC", and the one I attend now is (so yes, it's rather odd that I'd want to try TEC, but you're called where you're called, I guess).

I do have a question about the "liberalism" though - if you're much more conservative, are you considered a pariah? I'm thinking of Facebook, where if you so much as look like you believe marriage is only between a man and a woman, you're attacked. Obviously I don't go around talking about it, but if you're asked, and express an opinion against gay clergy and such, are you run out?

And communion is ok for baptized Christians? Don't have to be confirmed?

The liberalism that you speak of is much more common amongst the clergy and leadership of the church, similar to what you'd find in many mainline protestant denominations. The laity is split pretty evenly as far as liberal vs. conservative goes. Most parishes are going to have people who believe in the traditional idea of marriage and people that believe in a more liberal view of marriage. Some parish priests just love pushing their politics and can't resist the urge to make political statements every Sunday. However, that seems to be the exception and not the rule as far as most Episcopal parishes go (at least in my diocese).

 

[Albion]

I generally do sit in the back,but usually so people can't see me, not so I can see them. I guess it works both ways.

The UMC of my youth (I am 31) wasn't very liturgical, in fact, it was like the "creative UMC", and the one I attend now is (so yes, it's rather odd that I'd want to try TEC, but you're called where you're called, I guess).

I do have a question about the "liberalism" though - if you're much more conservative, are you considered a pariah?

In many parishes--yes. And you get to contribute to liberal causes, hear liberal sermons, read liberal editorials in church publications, hear of liberal projects being undertaken by the parish, etc. If you can endure all of that without feeling offended and/or out of place, you are a rare person. But there are some. It takes a lot of self-control and a willingness to always be at odds with the institutition you'd like to feel is your "own" church.

I'm thinking of Facebook, where if you so much as look like you believe marriage is only between a man and a woman, you're attacked. Obviously I don't go around talking about it, but if you're asked, and express an opinion against gay clergy and such, are you run out?

Oh, "run out" would be too strong a term. But you'd be made to feel old-fashioned and bigoted in a polite way.

And communion is ok for baptized Christians? Don't have to be confirmed?

That's right. But it's true in the conservative Episcopal parishes and most of the Anglican churches, too.

 

[oceansmile]

Polite is a plus I suppose. Unfortunately I've caught the flu - does it ever come on quickly - so I truely hope I can make it next week. Prayers of healing would be most welcome, of course.

 

[Izdaari Eristikon]

I generally do sit in the back,but usually so people can't see me, not so I can see them. I guess it works both ways.

The UMC of my youth (I am 31) wasn't very liturgical, in fact, it was like the "creative UMC", and the one I attend now is (so yes, it's rather odd that I'd want to try TEC, but you're called where you're called, I guess).

I do have a question about the "liberalism" though - if you're much more conservative, are you considered a pariah? I'm thinking of Facebook, where if you so much as look like you believe marriage is only between a man and a woman, you're attacked. Obviously I don't go around talking about it, but if you're asked, and express an opinion against gay clergy and such, are you run out?

And communion is ok for baptized Christians? Don't have to be confirmed?

Hi, I'm an Episcopalian, a relatively new one, in it just one year so far.

I have little experience of any other parishes, but in mine at least, we expect and accept a lot of diversity of opinion. I'm sure part of it is that most of us are not "cradle Episcopalians" but come from a wide variety of backgrounds, including former Baptists, Pentecostals and Catholics. Being in a cosmopolitan major west coast port city, we're diverse in ethnicity as well. And we are Republicans, Democrats, Libertarians and Greens, so the expectation of diversity extends to politics as well as theology.

And no confirmation is required, all who wish to commune are invited. Technically, you're supposed to be baptized to commune, but we don't ask.

 

[ebia]

Technically, you're supposed to be baptized to commune, but we don't ask.

Why would you offer someone communion but not offer to baptise them?

 

[HalupkiMonster]

Hi! Welcome to the Anglican section of CF! I'm a native of TAW, but I know this forum pretty well by now, too.

Most Anglican/Episcopal Churches should let any validly baptized Christian receive communion. The Church you speak of that is more restrictive may be part of a schismatic fringe group (ACNA, for example, which is notoriously conservative.)

Go to a few services. You'll soon pick up on the way things work. The Book of Common Prayer is a great resource, and you should be able to pick one up relatively cheap at any bookstore or Church. This has the services in it, and is a good guide to the services, feasts, laws, etc.

 

[HalupkiMonster]

Prayers of healing would be most welcome, of course.

Praying for your health and well-being.

 

[Izdaari Eristikon]

Why would you offer someone communion but not offer to baptise them?

That's a good question, but I don't know the answer and didn't set the policy.

 

[Crandaddy]

Polite is a plus I suppose. Unfortunately I've caught the flu - does it ever come on quickly - so I truely hope I can make it next week. Prayers of healing would be most welcome, of course.

I've had two bouts of it in the last five months, so I can sympathize. My prayers for your speedy recovery!

Generally the rule is that all baptised are welcomed to commune as visitors, but those making their home there should get confirmed.

This. ^