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write something nonsensical, surreal, silly. (3)
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<blockquote data-quote="Bob Crowley" data-source="post: 76743252" data-attributes="member: 383390"><p>I rocked up to the Pearly Gates thinking "Maybe I should have listened when Mother said 'Always look your best. You never know when you might be hit by a bus!' This is not going to look good!"</p><p></p><p>Saint Peter looked over the edge of his bifocals, which were tinted to keep out the eternal glare. When you have to switch your gaze from the bloke in front of you while reading the fine print, what with all the lawyers the devil's got, then look over a crowd of zillions pouring in from road accidents, Covid, Ukraine and Russia including friendly fire, retirement homes and tidal waves and try to find the next bloke in the queue, ordinary spectacles don't cut it.</p><p></p><p>The saintly Rock gave a start. "That's a nasty stain on your vestments, and if you don't mind my saying so, it must have been a bit embarassing for you! What happened!!"</p><p></p><p>I swallowed. "Well, it was when I decided to have a holiday in Darwin see. Then I thought I'd drive to a town called Katherine and have a look at some gorges they've got there. Very nice."</p><p></p><p>"Yes?" said St. Peter, pointing to the rest of the line disappearing over the far horizon.</p><p></p><p>I saw I needed to cut it short. "On the way back I bought a coffee. In one of those takeaway cups with a loose fitting lid."</p><p></p><p>"And?" said St. Peter getting pushy.</p><p></p><p>"Well, I was doing 130 kph, which was the fastest I've driven in Australia. You can only do it in the Northern Territory! And I reached down to pick up the very hot coffee cup. But I didn't get it right did I! Off came the lid and down went the entire coffee cup onto my lap!! Boy did it sting!! So there I was looking down at my lap and trying to lift the trouser leg of the shorts off my leg when I looked up again, and there bearing down on me was a 23 tonne road train with bull bars, big motor, 36 wheels and that was the last thing I saw ..."</p><p></p><p>"I see" said St. Peter, "didn't your mother ever tell you to be dressed for the occasion in case you got hit by a bus. Or in your case, a road train?"</p><p></p><p>"Yes" I muttered. </p><p></p><p>"It's Purgatory for you" said St. Peter. "You should have listened to your mother!"</p><p></p><p>"You can't come in here looking like that!".</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Bob Crowley, post: 76743252, member: 383390"] I rocked up to the Pearly Gates thinking "Maybe I should have listened when Mother said 'Always look your best. You never know when you might be hit by a bus!' This is not going to look good!" Saint Peter looked over the edge of his bifocals, which were tinted to keep out the eternal glare. When you have to switch your gaze from the bloke in front of you while reading the fine print, what with all the lawyers the devil's got, then look over a crowd of zillions pouring in from road accidents, Covid, Ukraine and Russia including friendly fire, retirement homes and tidal waves and try to find the next bloke in the queue, ordinary spectacles don't cut it. The saintly Rock gave a start. "That's a nasty stain on your vestments, and if you don't mind my saying so, it must have been a bit embarassing for you! What happened!!" I swallowed. "Well, it was when I decided to have a holiday in Darwin see. Then I thought I'd drive to a town called Katherine and have a look at some gorges they've got there. Very nice." "Yes?" said St. Peter, pointing to the rest of the line disappearing over the far horizon. I saw I needed to cut it short. "On the way back I bought a coffee. In one of those takeaway cups with a loose fitting lid." "And?" said St. Peter getting pushy. "Well, I was doing 130 kph, which was the fastest I've driven in Australia. You can only do it in the Northern Territory! And I reached down to pick up the very hot coffee cup. But I didn't get it right did I! Off came the lid and down went the entire coffee cup onto my lap!! Boy did it sting!! So there I was looking down at my lap and trying to lift the trouser leg of the shorts off my leg when I looked up again, and there bearing down on me was a 23 tonne road train with bull bars, big motor, 36 wheels and that was the last thing I saw ..." "I see" said St. Peter, "didn't your mother ever tell you to be dressed for the occasion in case you got hit by a bus. Or in your case, a road train?" "Yes" I muttered. "It's Purgatory for you" said St. Peter. "You should have listened to your mother!" "You can't come in here looking like that!". [/QUOTE]
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