Would You Ever...

[fluffy_rainbow]

enter into a relationship with someone who had a prior criminal record? I know that I, personally, would not judge someone who had been in prison for theft, drug possession, DUI, etc. if I could see their fruits bear witness to the fact that they are fully rehabilitated in the Lord. I'm not so sure, however, that I could overlook the fact that someone had been in prison for rape or murder.

How about you guys?

 

[caitlincares]

Very analytical person stepping up to the plate.

1) You may not know the person's criminal record.
2) God is the only one to judge someone else.
3) Is one sin worse than another sin?

Of course, we do need to do our best to watch out for our safety with God's guidance.

 

[invisiblebabe]

Could I have a friendship with someone who has that kind of past? Most definitely.

Romantic relationship though? Honestly, I doubt it..... not for forgiveness issues, but for what I would think would be too drastic differences of background. One of the biggest things I want in a relationship is being able to relate to and understand that person, and vice versa. I grew up quite sheltered... so I would likely have a hard time relating to that person at a deeper level.

 

[hazeleyes80]

enter into a relationship with someone who had a prior criminal record? I know that I, personally, would not judge someone who had been in prison for theft, drug possession, DUI, etc. if I could see their fruits bear witness to the fact that they are fully rehabilitated in the Lord. I'm not so sure, however, that I could overlook the fact that someone had been in prison for rape or murder.

How about you guys?

I have to be very careful. I will (Lord willing) be getting my teaching certificate in about 1.5 years. If I would end up dating someone who committed a major crime (rape, murder, child porn or molestation, grand larceny, etc.), and he committed it again, it could cause me to get fired by a school district or worse due to "guilt by association."

I think that for me, the main things I would look at would be the severity of the crime and how long it has been since he committed it. If he just got out of prison, then heck no, I'd never date him. If he had a DUI/underage at 16 and he's now 30 and it hasn't happened again since then, I wouldn't have a major problem with it.

Yes, I do realize that anyone could commit a crime. A "criminal history" has to start somewhere. Iif there's a clear pattern though, then that person should be avoided.

 

[plum]

I suppose we're all criminals with a record.




so would someone have a relationship with me, knowing these things about me?

 

[BeautyForAshes]

I could not ever date someone that was incarcerated for a serious offense, such as rape, murder, molestation, or aggravated battery.

As far as other minor crimes goes, it would depend on a lot of things:

1. If they are actively following Christ?
2. The crime itself (drug possession, theft, etc.)
3. The amount of time that has passed since being in jail. (I'm 29, so if I met someone that had done time when they were 18, 19 or 20 and has since turned their life around, then that wouldn't be such a big deal to me because we all make mistakes, especially when we're young)
4. What have they been doing with their life over the last few years (shoot, this applies to guys that haven't been incarcerated. )

These are just a few of the things I would consider.

 

[renaistre]

Would I ever...? Possibly, but it would really depend on the individual case - what it was, how long ago, evidence of change, patterns, etc.

 

[invisiblebabe]

Yeah, fearing for my own safety would be a big part of it, too. At 5'7" and not quite 110, I doubt I could take most guys

 

[renaistre]

Yeah, fearing for my own safety would be a big part of it, too. At 5'7" and not quite 110, I doubt I could take most guys

Not to derail thread... but isn't 5'7" kinda tall for a gymnast?

 

[jenptcfan]

I think it would depend on the type of crime, how long ago it was, if they've gotten right with God about it and know that he's healed them from repeating the crime, etc.

But rape, molestation, murder, domestic abuse....I don't think I could do it. Maybe that's judgemental of me, but if I were to be a mother, I would have a responsibility to protect my family...and purposefully getting into a relationship with someone who has struggled with those things in the past might not be the best way for me to do that.

If someone else sees it differently and could trust that person to not repeat their past mistakes, I think that's very respectable though.

 

[goat37]

I would just like to point out that while sins are sins in god's eyes, and all are bad... some things are not only sins, they're felonies.

So while I would have no problem being with someone that had a criminal record for something they did while young and foolish (so long as they don't mind me ribbing them about it and calling them 'jail bait', which is my sense of humor) I couldn't be with a girl who, for instance, cut off a very important part of her last boyfriend and threw it out the car window while driving... I just draw certain lines like that....

 

[invisiblebabe]

Not to derail thread... but isn't 5'7" kinda tall for a gymnast?

Yes yes it is, in fact it's very tall for a gymnast. Since I was 11, I've always been taller than my coaches and pretty much every other girl in the gym

I do have a former gymnast friend who is 5'11", though.

 

[stonetoflesh]

Depends on the crime... I don't think I would want a relationship with a woman who had committed a "serious" felony-- it seems it would just be too uncomfortable knowing that this woman has killed someone, or embezzled millions of dollars and here I am in a relationship with her. "Lesser" charges (drug possession, theft, etc.) are a different story, probably just because I can relate to it more; I've possessed (and used) plenty of drugs, I've stolen things, driven drunk, etc.-- I just never got busted. I've done more than enough bad stuff but all that garbage is in the past; likewise if said woman has done these things but has been washed clean in Christ and put that life behind her, then it's all good by me.

 

[hazeleyes80]

Yes yes it is, in fact it's very tall for a gymnast. Since I was 11, I've always been taller than my coaches and pretty much every other girl in the gym

I do have a former gymnast friend who is 5'11", though.

Also, I think you're only about 2 inches taller than Svetlana Khorkina, and look how far she went in gymnastics!

 

[AveMaria]

Wow, good question.

It would really depend - what did they do time for, what were the circumstances, how long ago was it, how have they changed and turned their life around since? A violent crime or a sex crime would be an absolute no-no. But, someone whose crime was drug posession when they were 18 would be a bit different, especially if they had really turned their life around and were now working as an addictions counselor or something.

A big worry for me would be finances - Ex-cons often have problems getting hired, especially in certain jobs, and also in renting apartments. This could be a real problem later down the road!

 

[Nico]

this is a good quest. b/c i'm dealing w/that now. i met this guy. he was cool. he wants to hang out. he's new to the city, etc. then he tells me that he's a confirmed sex addict. i'm rather torn as to what i should do. i don't really want to put myself in a bad situation. but who am i to judge? i don't want to be stupid though.....i haven't called him back yet. i'm still trying to figure it out.

 

[Thithy]

Could I have a friendship with someone who has that kind of past? Most definitely.

Romantic relationship though? Honestly, I doubt it..... not for forgiveness issues, but for what I would think would be too drastic differences of background. One of the biggest things I want in a relationship is being able to relate to and understand that person, and vice versa. I grew up quite sheltered... so I would likely have a hard time relating to that person at a deeper level.

This is very much how I feel. I don't think I could have said it any better myself.

 

[Tuffguy]

I have to be very careful. I will (Lord willing) be getting my teaching certificate in about 1.5 years. If I would end up dating someone who committed a major crime (rape, murder, child porn or molestation, grand larceny, etc.), and he committed it again, it could cause me to get fired by a school district or worse due to "guilt by association."

.

So the worst part about dating a pedifile would be the black mark on your career? LOL Oh man,,i'm rolling. LOL
I'm sure theres other downsides too!!!! LOL,,sides hurting.

 

[invisiblebabe]

Also, I think you're only about 2 inches taller than Svetlana Khorkina, and look how far she went in gymnastics!

Haha yeah She's 5'5" I believe.

I've met the Hamm twins (twice!), Shannon Miller, Kristen Maloney, Steve McCain...

But yeah, I was sure never anywhere NEAR that talented.... I've just met people who are

 

[Breetai]

Would You Ever...

enter into a relationship with someone who had a prior criminal record? I know that I, personally, would not judge someone who had been in prison for theft, drug possession, DUI, etc. if I could see their fruits bear witness to the fact that they are fully rehabilitated in the Lord. I'm not so sure, however, that I could overlook the fact that someone had been in prison for rape or murder.

How about you guys?

I will try to avoid it! How could I travel in my spouse had a record? A criminal record seriously hinders that.