Worship together?

[soulsearching1]

I'm very new to Christianity officially, though it has been a process of several months. Anyway, I am dating a wonderful man, who is also Christian. First I'll just note that he is not the reason I became Christian- that's a whole other thread, but it's clear in my mind that he has nothing to do with my decision.

My boyfriend was raised Christian until he was a young teenager when he fell away (parents divorced, he rebelled). He came back to it a few years ago- about 3 or 4. (He's 29) Lately, he's been having some personal issues that he's been trying to sort out- mostly job stuff and his position in life, which gets him to question his faith. I know that his stuff is between him and God, and I'm not saying that his relationship with me is to be more important. I know that each of our relationships with God comes first and other relationships, ie the one between my boyfriend and I, come second. I just want to be able to share this stuff with my boyfriend now.

We attend church together and our Community Group, but lately he hasn't been going to Community Group.
He doesn't really utilize the fellowship support system that he has available to him, whether it is with them or with me. I know that fellowship is part of growing in our relationship with God, so I am just wondering how can I incorporate that into our relationship? And on what level? We're not married and I don't know if there are different rules for that stuff between just dating and being married. Sorry if this sounds really ignorant. I know I can't help my boyfriend make decisions about the stuff he's going through (only he and God can do that), but I do want to be able to support him. And as I mentioned before, I would like it if he could have a hand in supporting me as well. So if there are things we could do together that would help each of us individually, by supporting each other, I'd like to know.

If this isn't clear, feel free to ask questions.

 

[peanutbutter12]

Remember that worship is different for each person, and you can't force someone into something they don't want to do. For me, I would never put myself into or get involved with one of these "fellowship support systems" for my own personal reasons which I won't discuss here. Point is, that maybe you are on a different level than he is spiritually. This isn't really a bad thing, nor does it make you or him any better than the other. It just means that he may see things differently.

CJ

 

[soulsearching1]

Maybe I used the wrong words. Our Community Group is just a Bible study- it's comprised of 20-somethings in the area. We have a potluck dinner and chat for a bit and then do a bible study. From what I know of other churches and other friends who are Christian and do not go to church, bible study groups are fairly common???

Anyway, I'm not going to force him to go to our community group- that's not what I meant. I just want to support him, wherever he is at and wherever I am at.

 

[TravellingGrace]

I think the fact you want to support him like that is a good thing. If you're really worried, just ask him why he doesnt' want to go to the community dinner, and just let him know he doesn't have to, but you would love it if he could come with you. Sometimes people just need a gentle nudge or something to get them to do something.

I think it's awesome that you want to worship together, just be careful of the complimenting the bf through prayer thing...

 

[soulsearching1]

When I pray for him, I just pray to God to help him work out all of the stuff he needs to work out and to help him make the right decisions. I try very hard not to consider myself in any of it, and I think I do a fairly decent job

Basically, he's just been very unhappy lately and it makes me sad because I don't like seeing him sad. I don't like seeing any of my loved ones sad, ya know? And like I said, I know I can't force him or make decisions for him, but I feel like there's gotta be something I could do for him, that's all. I mean, God wants us to have relationships with each other- platonic or otherwise, so I assume we're supposed to support each other in certain ways, within those relationships. I just don't know what ways those might be.

 

[TravellingGrace]

sounds like you've got your head on straight

I think in any relationship being a listening ear is a good thing It's hard to know what to do all the time, but that's because none of us are perfect... I totally understand though, I don't like to see any of my loved ones sad or hurting either...

 

[Shazamataz]

I understand. I've had a few issues with my boyf with prayer and his faith and stuff. And sometimes, they just need a bit of encouragement. But Sometimes, all you can do is talk to them a bit and encourage them back towards God, but then, you have to give them space to think about it and make a decision... to either get serious about God or risk losing you... that's the decision I gave my man. Becuase if you are in a serious relationship thinking about marriage... your man needs to be the spiritual head of the home.

My advice is, encourage him, then back out of the way. Make sure he knows you're there for him if he needs you, but give him all the space he needs, so that he can figure out whatever. And don't ever stop praying for him!!!!
"The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective" - James 5:16

 

[Shazamataz]

I understand. I've had a few issues with my boyf with prayer and his faith and stuff. And sometimes, they just need a bit of encouragement. But Sometimes, all you can do is talk to them a bit and encourage them back towards God, but then, you have to give them space to think about it and make a decision... to either get serious about God or risk losing you... that's the decision I gave my man. Becuase if you are in a serious relationship thinking about marriage... your man needs to be the spiritual head of the home.

My advice is, encourage him, then back out of the way. Make sure he knows you're there for him if he needs you, but give him all the space he needs, so that he can figure out whatever. And don't ever stop praying for him!!!!
"The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective" - James 5:16