Winking?

[Amélie Unbound]

What do you think about winking? Do you wink a lot? If so, when you wink at someone, what is your meaning or intention?

Let's say a young single woman at your place of work frequently winks at a married male coworker, when saying hello to him or just passing him in the hall. Would you assume she's coming on to him?

I don't wink very often. When I do, it's either because I'm winking at my husband, meaning, "You're hot and I want you now," or because I'm making a joke, and the wink is my way of showing I'm joking. If someone winks in neither of those contexts, I don't know what exactly it means.

 

[andiesmama]

I never wink, neither does my DH....I've always thought of it as a type of flirting, but that's just my own simple opinion!

 

[Cordy]

I do wink. I have never winked at a guy as a means of flirting, but as a way of indicating I am joking or to make someone know everything is ok.

 

[Epoh99]

I usually think of it as flirting, except for when someone winks to indicate they're joking and even that instance could be flirtatious depending on the situation. My husband winks at me to make me laugh (long story going back to when we were dating) and growing up my family would wink at each other to indicate we were playing a joke on the other person.

I definitely think a single female coworker winking at a guy in the situation you mentioned sounds fliratious or as if they have a private secret between the two of them.

 

[Mrs. Enigma]

I think this is the quick reply way over here, so hopefully this is it. I am sure it is.

Anyway, I do not ever wink. I do not even think to do it. Nobody seems to ever wink at anyone much that I have observed. I think it must be this area or something.

 

[Svt4Him]

I sometimes wink, but I tell people I sometimes get a twitch in my eye. One guy then asked me if I was sure, cause he was free if I wanted to buy him a beer after work.

I thought that was a funny response.

 

[Redguard]

Winking just seems weird to me.

And I feel weird when people wink at me.

 

[HeatherJay]

Well I wink all the time, lol. I think it's a southern thing 'cause lots of people do around here. It's just part of me being friendly, smiley, and happy with people. I'm also a touchy person...touching someone's arm when I talk to them or hugging. Again, I think these are just part of the whole southern attitude...lots of people are like that.

All you yankees would probably definitely percieve me as flirty, lol. It's not intentional flirting...it's just the culture around here.

So, obviously, I wouldn't be at all bothered by it if someone winked at my husband (or any other married man). Unless you have more concrete evidence I'd say it's probably harmless.

 

[Mary_Magdalene]

Im with HeatherJay- I wink too and I think its a sourthern thing....

i dont wink at men (except my DH) though-dont want anyone to misunderstand.

 

[Linnis]

I honestly don't know how to wink. I only ever wink online but that's only because my sarcasim gets lost online sometimes.

 

[Amélie Unbound]

So, obviously, I wouldn't be at all bothered by it if someone winked at my husband (or any other married man). Unless you have more concrete evidence I'd say it's probably harmless.

Actually, it's my husband who wants to know about this. He's been coming home telling me about this woman winking at him at work. It makes him very uncomfortable and he's not sure what it means or how to respond.

I already know she's after him, because she invited him to go to a concert with her, just the two of them, and I actually saw her flirting with him at a party (after manipulating things so that he and I were on opposites sides of the room), but until recently, my husband has been oblivious to her motives and thought she just wanted to be friends. The winking thing is making him wonder though.

 

[Missing]

I have a friend who does a lot of winking. It's just part of her personality and she doesn't mean anything by it. She's an adorable person, very friendly and lots of smiles and she certainly doesn't mean anything by it (Christian woman, very happily married, her and her husband recently graduated from ministry studies and plan to eventually have their own church). She'll wink at men and women normally in the course of a conversation after a joke or to indicate something she is thinking about that only the two of us would be thinking about (a past conversation, etc.). But she also will wink at people sometimes when saying hello or when she makes eye contact with someone during a meeting or an event (I could see her winking at someone walking down the hallway as the OP mentioned when she doesn't have time to strike up a full conversation).

I don't think anyone who spends much time with her at all would think she was flirting with anyone when she does it because it's part of her personality. She's a very attractive woman and I have never felt threatened or even given a second thought to her winking at my husband or me for that matter! On the other hand there are other people I have met who are very flirtatious and if they winked at someone, especially at my husband, I would be suspicious of their intentions. So I guess it depends on the personality of the winker in question as to whether I think they mean anything by winking. If there was someone I didn't know who was constantly winking at my husband, I would probably feel uncomfortable with it because they are not someone I know and I am not sure of their intentions....but I wouldn't assume their intentions were adulterous.

 

[Svt4Him]

Winking just seems weird to me.

And I feel weird when people wink at me.

 

[Cordy]

LOL

 

[Beth1231]

If I say something with a straight face to a friend and I'm joking, I sometimes wink. I wink at Hubby on rare occasion. Orchard, I had a feeling you meant that "will you to the concert" lady that you posted about earlier. I would go up to her the very next time I caught her and tell her point blank "Excuse me. See that man over there? *hold up wedding ring" He's mine and you need to back off." And then I would calmly walk away.

 

[Leanna]

I don't wink but I don't have a good reason.

I think if his coworker wants to wink at him, that's her problem. He can just stay away because she's creepy. Good enough reason for me!

 

[Peppermint Patty]

What do you think about winking? Do you wink a lot? If so, when you wink at someone, what is your meaning or intention?

Let's say a young single woman at your place of work frequently winks at a married male coworker, when saying hello to him or just passing him in the hall. Would you assume she's coming on to him?

I don't wink very often. When I do, it's either because I'm winking at my husband, meaning, "You're hot and I want you now," or because I'm making a joke, and the wink is my way of showing I'm joking. If someone winks in neither of those contexts, I don't know what exactly it means.

Some people just wink a lot, to show that they are friendly or approachable as a person. Of course, the look on one's face usually reveals the intent behind it. You can tell by the eyes and smile if it's friendly or flirty.

But to be safe, I only wink at my immediate family, and not very often, only when I want to show them I'm kidding about something.

 

[Peppermint Patty]

I sometimes wink, but I tell people I sometimes get a twitch in my eye. One guy then asked me if I was sure, cause he was free if I wanted to buy him a beer after work.

I thought that was a funny response.

So, did you take him up on it??

 

[Godisgr8r]

I don't wink at anyone but my husband, and that is only because he winks first.

 

[Godisgr8r]

I don't wink at anyone but my husband, and that is only because he winks at me first.