WHY???

[vialynnrose710]

I feel like my heart is going to burst right out of my chest..... what more can I say...it hurts so deep like it's going to be a part of me forever.

My dad passed away yesterday morning suddenly, without warning, but HE KNEW!!!!!!!!! He knew he was ill and never told a soul. I keep asking him why, and I just keep asking God why but I already know the answers. God's will is always done, good or bad. Now I just need to find the peace to go on.

I have been numb for the last day because it has fallen on my shoulders to handle everything and I think this evening I have just started to thaw. It's just sinking in and this horrible heaviness in my chest just came on me. I know there must be someone out there who has gone through this... please pray for me. Dear Lord I need your comforting hand now more than ever.

 

[vialynnrose710]

I feel like my heart is going to burst right out of my chest..... what more can I say...it hurts so deep like it's going to be a part of me forever.

My dad passed away yesterday morning suddenly, without warning, but HE KNEW!!!!!!!!! He knew he was ill and never told a soul. I keep asking him why, and I just keep asking God why but I already know the answers. God's will is always done, good or bad. Now I just need to find the peace to go on.

I have been numb for the last day because it has fallen on my shoulders to handle everything and I think this evening I have just started to thaw. It's just sinking in and this horrible heaviness in my chest just came on me. I know there must be someone out there who has gone through this... please pray for me. Dear Lord I need your comforting hand now more than ever.

 

[Mr.Cheese]

Wow.
all I have to offer is a hug *hug*

 

[Deamiter]

And a prayer. May God grant your soul peace.

 

[caitlin]

A long time ago, someone really close to me died. It happened again a few years ago.
I had this dream though.
I was somewhere...I couldn't tell where. There was a phone on a chair. I rang a few times and I picked it up. It was Nancy Dong, a person who was very friendly and nice to me, she was close to me. She talked to me and I was crying, cause she seemed so happy, so calm. I kept telling her over the phone that she was going to die but she just went on talking cheerfully to me. then she said "bye" and hung up. I put the receiver down and just started crying.
(Remember: that was a dream)
then my mom woke me up. I looked at her and just started to cry. I told her my dream and my mom said that the dream meant that Mrs. Dong (that's what i called Nancy) was in Heaven and was happy there. of course i was still a little girl so i believed her...and i still do. I'm not kidding either. If i were, i'd be putting up smilies all over the place....i still cry at times
she died cause she had cancer and had to have surgery. my uncle (Mrs. Dong's son) was there at the hospital with her...he told his sister not to come over to the hospital (they lived in different states). then i found out at night...it was hard for all of us to get over it, even though some still haven't. She used to send cards on birthdays and holidays...cards that she made on the computer.
Scrabble is a game that's significant to me. last time i visited her, she let me play Scrabble on her computer, even though i wasn't very good...i miss her...the other death didn't effect me as much as that one...i didn't eve n know the baby...
my mom had a miscarriage, he/she was supposed to be my baby brother/sister. but God has blessed our family with another child, my sister who's still young. i remember the day i found out that the baby that was supposed to be a good heathly baby
i was at a friends house cause there was no one to take care of me at my own house. my friend and i were hiding in a closet from her big brother...laughing. then the doorbell rang. my friend's mom opened the door. my mom walked in and she was crying, she hugged my friend's mom (my friend and i were like cousins). that's when i knew exactly what had happened. i had learned in school what a miscarriage was.
well, that's it, really....i expected to write more. I'm sorry for what happened. i just wanted to let you know that you're not alone.

Caitlin

 

[Newsboy1900]

im sorry for your loss i will pray for you

 

[* kittie *]

i'm really sorry about your loss.
i can relate in that i never knew that my dad was ill either...but...i won't go into that right now.

don't lose faith...comfort will come.
but yeah...i know it's tough right now. i think one of the biggest lies is that grieving is wrong. i had some christian teacher/friends tell me that. and i'm not sure what's on your mind right now, but don't believe that.

i'm sorry. take care

 

[One Son of Many]

Hello, Vialynnrose. My sympathy for you in your time of sorrow. I wanted you to know that on the same day your father passed away, I buried my mother. (Wednesday the 21st, right?)

I will miss her very much until the appointed day that we may all be together again. I find that reading through the book of James to be comforting. (James 1:12 especially)

 

[One Son of Many]

... i think one of the biggest lies is that grieving is wrong. i had some christian teacher/friends tell me that. and i'm not sure what's on your mind right now, but don't believe that.

i'm sorry. take care

try this passage: Mat5:4

 

[caitlin]

don't lose faith...comfort will come.

*kittie* is right...no one should loose faith, especially in times like these when many have lost a loved one.

Caitlin

 

[GreenEyedLady]

Oh I feel your pain.....I am so sorry.
I knew my father was dying and I had just a few days with him as I was living in Germany at the time. It is so hard, losing your Dad. I lost my mother this august and its not the same. My dad was my hero, my guidence, and my confindant. I still miss him dearly. I grieved him for a very long time. The bible is clear that mourning and grief is OK. Remember Job? One thing that my pastor said was that thier is a time to grieve and a time to mourn and then a time to stop. I stopped grieiveing my father when I lost my daughter. Now I am grieveing my mother.
Its a slow process and a jorney in itself. Sometimes it feels like hell on earth. I hope that you feel the Lord huggin you. He is right there. Please remember that. And know that you will always miss your daddy, but there will come a day when you will walk down that road, and be at peace.
My blessings to you and your family.
GEL

 

[GMRELIC]

I am so sorry for your loss, I lost my 15 yr old son 12/28/03 due to a gun accident, so i know your pain is so bad at this time, my son has only been gone for 5 weeks,
and for the first 4 weeks I didn't even know if I was going to be able to live thru it, The last week has been alot better for me, but still have had many difficult times during this last week, I do know that God has carried me and my family thru this and he will you, I am in constant prayer with him to get us thru this, I will add you to my prayer list and ask God to carry you and lift you up like he has been doing in our family. I know God will help oth of us in dealing with the pain we are going thru, God has never let me down, and he won't this time either, My prayers are with you and your family and May God Bless all of you.

 

[Salsa_1960]

You probably will be numb for a while. Grief has a funny way of hitting us at odd times.

(((Hugs)))

~Sandy

 

[Jesusfreekwanabe]

wow ur a strong person , one of the first things u said was that to be Gods will to be done. im afride to say , but this verse i have seen make my firend strong , so hear it gose
We do not live ot our selves , and we do not die to our selves If we live we live to the to the lord , and if we die , we die to the lord ; so whether we live or die , we are the lord's
just saying that to my self neary tears me up , of joy .
oh we r bessed , we belong to Jesus who tryumped over all death .

 

[Rainbow.]

Oh im very sorry to hear your sad news. God bless your fathers soul, and may God bring you his loving peace and strenght to carry you through yoiur time of need. I have lost a darling niece and a few dear friends, so i know the unbearable pain of grief that grips your heart. Im sure the shock of your fathers sudden death has compounded the feeling of grief as you never got to say goodbye. Im sure your father must have been a great man to go through his illness alone to save you all the heartbreak. Be assured we will all pray for you and your family and send healing thoughts your way. It maybe a good idea to seek grief counselling as sometimes we need others other than friends and family to call on for support. If you ever need a friend, im just a message away.
God bless you, and keep the faith. ((((((((Hugs))))))))))
Love your sister in Christ, Grace.

 

[Rupert]

I know how you feel, my heart feels like it has been ripped out and stomped on. I have been a Christian for 30+ years. I met my wife at school and she helped bring me to the Lord. We have three beautiful daughters a great Son in Law and an awesome grandson. Then Nov 25/03 my wife who had never been sick died while driving her car of a Brain Anuerism. Thank God she managed to pull her car over without harming anyone. She was 48 and we have been married for just under 30 years. Am I mad at God you better beleive it. But I still turn to him for help. We had a memorial service for my wife which was honouring to her and to God. A normal everyday woman and 800+ people turned up to our small church. The support from freinds and family has been great but now I need time to myself. To pray, think and refocus my life. Trust in the Lord and he will be there for you.

 

[Nikolas222]

another thing i believe is god takes some people to send challenges to others to test their faith.

Also, everyone has free-will so everyone controls their future, like putting answers on a test, you choose; the right one, or the wrong one.

I lost my cousin on 4/23/03, so please dont think i think i know what im talking about.

-Nick

 

[childofgrace]

Praying for you as you deal with this tremendous loss. May you see God's presence in the midst of this tragedy. I pray you will have the strength and the wisdom to handle all that you are facing right now.

Kirk

 

[Turtle For God]

I pray that everyone who is grieving will stay in the Lord and seek his comfort and guidance to deal with their grief. When I lost someone very dear to me, I turned away from God, turned toward the comforts of this Earth and ended up being a drug addict and an alcoholic. I wasted years of my life, because I lost my faith and refused to turn to God for help. I am finally back on track in my walk with the Lord. I regret that I threw away those years of my life by turning away from the Lord, but I must move on in my faith and return to the path that the Lord set for me.
PLEASE, do not waste years of your life like I did by turning away from God and turning to the comforts of this Earth. Keep with God and he will see you through this unbelievable time of grief and suffering.
My thoughts and prayers are with you all!