Why is it "different when they're yours?"

[Ariadne_GR]

I think that it sounds as though you've made your decision and yes, you do have valid reasons.

In my case, I used to think kids were cute (in high school), now I just think they're annoying and would not want to be stuck with one, even if it was my own (great, I can't give it back when it starts whining). It's a life choice that should be your own and no one else's to make. Young people fall pregnant accidentally all the time, no one tells them they're too young and irresponsible. Not really, so why should someone making a decision not to have children be any different?

Do what's right for you, not what society wants you to do. I'd choose being able to enjoy my life and succeeding in my career over having children any day! I'd resent staying home and looking after kids, so I know it's not something I'm cut out for. It sounds as though you've decided that for yourself also.

 

[~Lynz~]

if you dont want kids thats fine thats your choice. but shouldnt you wait till your in a serious relationship untill u make a decision so permanent. yes your prob gonna find a girl with the same views as you to children... but whats the need to have it done right now...

and if u cant trust a girl to take the pill every day then u shouldnt be with them. you got to trust her fully.

i would suggest u wait till your in a relationship and the girl gets an iud or even an implant that will last a few yr before u make a big change to you.

 

[Spirit_Star]

I say if you are that firm that you don’t want kids then go head and get a vasectomy. Parenthood is not everyone in fact I think there are lot of people who should never be parents. If someone just knows parenthood is not for them then I think they are being responsible to try and cut down the chance that they would ever father a child or get pregnant.

Even if you change your mind one day there are other options for having children. Adoption, fostering, donor/egg donation, could end up married to a woman who has children already. We need to live our lives for today, not tomorrow, as that may never come.

 

[Umaro]

if you dont want kids thats fine thats your choice. but shouldnt you wait till your in a serious relationship untill u make a decision so permanent. yes your prob gonna find a girl with the same views as you to children... but whats the need to have it done right now...

What's the need to wait if I'm sure of it? It's implied that if I get into a serious relationship I'll potentially change my mind, but what if I do and regret it anyways like I originally thought?

and if u cant trust a girl to take the pill every day then u shouldnt be with them. you got to trust her fully.

You're thinking trust as in "I trust you not to cheat." I mean trust as in "can I really trust a person to never forget this daily ritual? We all forget things from time to time, but this one is really important to me." I'm not saying a girl is bad for it, just that accidents happen, and something this important I'm uncomfortable with unless I'm the one personally having to always remember.

i would suggest u wait till your in a relationship and the girl gets an iud or even an implant that will last a few yr before u make a big change to you.

I really wish there was an IUD like device for men.

 

[PegasusOnFire]

have you looked into joining a study like this: Male birth control pill soon a reality - Health - Sexual health ...

 

[Mayzoo]

Is your urologist refusing you the procedure after they had agreed?

 

[Umaro]

Is your urologist refusing you the procedure after they had agreed?

No, but I kept getting the run around with banking a sperm sample. "Oh, this is written on the wrong letter head" and other goofy excuses. That and my mothers profound protests have made me put it off for the time being.

 

[Mayzoo]

No, but I kept getting the run around with banking a sperm sample. "Oh, this is written on the wrong letter head" and other goofy excuses. That and my mothers profound protests have made me put it off for the time being.

Letterhead style and font, of course, is of paramount importance .

Seriously, if you choose to have kids for you, that is great. Do not choose to have them for your mom no matter how much she protests. My brother never had children, and I do not believe he regrets it. He was never really parent material (and I do not say this from hate, just loving truth that he also says). Our mother of course cried, manipulated, cajoled, pleaded, begged, etc for years and years. He never gave in, even though he has been married for over 20 years.

When people tell you that you are too young to make this decision, find out how they would feel about you getting married. Amazingly, it is viewed as perfectly fine to make a life long decision about marriage (probably the most important decision you will ever make ) anywhere from the age of 18-23 but you are not mature enough to decide if you want kids or not, also an important decision, but not the most important decision you will ever make.

Good luck to you no matter what you do.